"Stay Dean." Dean turned and found his little brother standing in the doorway. Neither had heard him enter.
"I'm going to go Sam. I didn't mean to…"
"Just. Stay." Sam said with exasperation. "Your leg is a mess. You shouldn't spend the next twelve hours in a car. That won't be good for the area around your knee. Not too sure if you did damage to more than the skin there. You don't have a lot of meat there."
"I'm fine."
"Shut up Dean. Sit down. Shut up."
"Don't order me around Sam."
"You'll do whatever in the hell I want you to do. Driver picks the music remember? Well I'm the driver here. So I'm picking the music. And I suggest you sit your ass down." Dean, taken aback, did as instructed.
"Jess." Sam started.
"Your behavior has been unacceptable Sam, and I don't appreciate being lied to."
"I couldn't' just say, 'hey I'm Sam, I come from a family of ghost hunters, wanna go on a date?' Really Jessica, you would have thought that I was insane."
"We've been dating almost three years now Sam. When did you plan on telling me?"
Sam looked down, he didn't want to answer this question honestly. He wet his lips and then looked her dead in the face. "When he left I made him promise never to tell anyone." Dean said and took his place next to his brother, defending Sam even though he had been awful to him mere hours ago. Sam looked over to his brother, amazed.
"Why?" Jessica asked in dismay.
"Because, we do what we do and we stay quiet about it. It keeps us safe and it keeps those we are close to safe. The bad things can't come and get what they don't know exists." Jessica wrinkled her brows.
"Then…do you have a girlfriend that doesn't know about this stuff?"
"No. I don't do normal."
"You don't do normal?" she asked, confusion and amazement etched into her features. "What in the hell does that mean?"
"It means I live the life, I hunt, I kill, I try and protect people. I don't have time to do this.." he indicated the apartment around him. "I can't risk getting someone else hurt…or dead. I can't do it!" Dean exploded. "I've lost everyone I've ever loved. I can't…just can't."
Jessica looked at Sam and then back and Dean and the pieces started to click into place. The anger, the love, the hate, the loyalty, the hurt, the worry, the bitterness. She was beginning to understand now.
She took a seat on the chair opposite Dean, ran her hands down the length of her face, clasped them and put them on her knees. "So, Sam gave up 'the life'." She said using her fingers as quote markers. "So he could have this life. So he could have normal."
"Yes." Dean said and Sam nodded.
"But, you got stuck with the life, you got stuck following your dad's orders."
"I…" Dean didn't have a chance to finish, Jess stopped him.
"And you're jealous, because he got to have a life, any kind of life that wasn't constantly consumed with evil."
"He deserves it."
"I've never understood why you are like this! You constantly do that. You act like a martyr."
"I have to protect you."
"I live here, I'm fine, I don't need your protection Dean! I'm not a child!"
"The thing that killed mom, what if one of these days it came after you, or Jessica? Huh? What then? It's not like we are off that thing's radar. They will always be after us, or the ones we love. We have to stick close."
"I don't want to worry about that stuff for the rest of my life Dean!"
"You have to! It's not right to know about it and then do nothing! There are other people out there…"
"Who cares! There are people right here! There are people right here, there is a family right here, that needs to be protected and cared for. And don't give me that bull crap sticking together speech. Dad isn't with you. He isn't watching your back. He isn't sticking close to you, so what does it matter?! Obviously dad isn't worried! Why should we!?"
"There are people out there Sam!"
"People we don't know…we can't save everyone Dean. We can't!"
"But we can save some…"
"This is nothing but revenge. REVENGE Dean. Mom is long gone. You can't possibly remember her, why are you so hell bent on this crusade?!" Jessica knew that Sam had gone over that invisible line. She felt it and watched Dean's face fall.
"Sam. You have a remarkable knack for sticking your foot in your mouth." She said and looked at Dean. "He didn't mean that."
"Yeah, he did. And I'll have him know, that it isn't revenge. It's all about me not wanting another four year old to have to raise his little brother, to have to watch other kids get things that he can't even dream about, about missing a mom so badly that you can't stand it. If it stops one kid from being terrified at night, then it is worth it. That's why I do what I do, and sacrifice everything for it." Dean swallowed and looked away and said. "Even if that means I lose my brother and his respect."