Title: Without Reservation – Pt. 10

By: FanofRandy

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. Emergency! is owned by Universal and Mark VII Productions. I write for pure enjoyment and to stretch my imagination…I do not make any profit from these characters or stories.

Summary: A new policy had Gage worried and Brackett concerned for this young Paramedic. What happens will change their relationship, and other friendships Johnny has forged, forever.

Author's Note: I wondered about John Gage's ancestry for the years I watched Emergency! Since it was not expounded upon…it leaves a lot to our imaginations (what better fodder for Fan Fiction, huh?). I am taking a few liberties and much of my research was done online.

Flashback:

Johnny had done okay at most of the foster homes he visited after leaving the Lewis'. But some of them had been pretty bad. He had nearly died at one of the places when the mother put four of the foster kids, including Johnny, in a locked shed in her back yard for three days. That had been the hottest summer on record and when the children were found, they were malnourished, dehydrated and nearly dead from heat exhaustion. At the clinic on the Reservation he saw the same doctor who had treated him in Florida and told his Father to move his family to Oklahoma. Johnny had heard a rumor that one of the other kids had actually died. But, all he knew was that he wished he had died. At least he would not have to endure any more pain.

Right before he was saved—for that was how he viewed it—he had a particularly bad foster "dad." This man was not really a dad, he was actually the drug dealer of his foster mom. He was a big, mean guy and for some reason, he really hated Johnny. Johnny tried not to be at the house when he came 'round, but that was not always possible. Whenever "Daddy Dave", for that was what he demanded to be called, came around, Johnny was beaten within an inch of his life. This went on for a year before someone finally noticed the horrible scars on his back and legs and "saved" him.

Johnny went to seven different foster homes before his high school track coach finally took him in and made him a part of his family. Mr. Garner had encouraged Johnny to try out for track and helped him with his troubles when he could. When Mr. Garner stepped in, sometimes things became worse for John, so he tried to pick the battles he helped with. When he saw Johnny beaten to a pulp and blood soaking through the back of his t-shirt one morning, Mr. Garner went to the principal who then called the police. Johnny never saw "Daddy Dave" again.

When he went to live with the Garners, he was scared, bitter and angry. He had so many emotions flooding him that he did not know what to do. The Garners sent him to see a psychologist for a few weeks. He hated it…he hated talking about his feelings and would much rather just forget everything that happened. One day, a bully at school said something about his mother, and Johnny just LOST it. Before he knew what was happening a teacher and the principal were pulling him off the kid. He was arrested for assault even though the boy was not hurt badly. Mr. Garner talked to the judge, Johnny got a few months probation, and the boy never bothered Johnny again.

For the next two years, Johnny's life was as good as he could have imagined it without his parents around. Mr. Garner and his wife were nice to him. He learned to allow the bullying and teasing to "roll off his back" as Mr. Garner taught him to do. Whenever he heard someone call him a "half-breed", "stupid injun", or other racial slur, Johnny would just turn his face up toward the heavens and remember that he was made in God's image and that meant he was special. Johnny remembered the story of the Frog and the Scorpion and told himself he would not allow his "nature" to be spoiled by the horrible events in his life-he would choose to be the kind, generous, loving boy that his mother had always said he was.

When Johnny was sixteen, his Aunt Sandra came to get him. She had been estranged from the family since she went off to California and was not aware that her sister had died. She was devastated when she heard the news and tried desperately to find Johnny. She called Mr. Garner and let him know that she would like to take custody of her nephew, but did not want to do anything to further traumatize him. Johnny insisted that Mr. Garner keep his experiences in foster care from his aunt. "She has enough to feel guilty about with Mom dyin' and her not knowin'. I don't want her to think she is in any way responsible for the hell that I went through in those places." Mr. Garner was amazed at how insightful John was at only 16 years old. He promised John that he would not say anything to his aunt, but encouraged him to tell her one day and not to keep it a secret.

"Secrets can kill, John. Believe me, a secret kept can tear you, and those around you, apart."

Mr. Garner whispered those words to John again as the young man got on a Greyhound Bus with his Aunt to head out to California to live. Johnny had plans to live a life to make his parents proud. He wanted only to make them proud. And, that would be what he would spend the rest of his life doing.

Roy waited by the ER double doors. He felt like this day should be over; the shift should be over—they had gotten called out after lunch and now it was dark outside and Roy wasn't sure of the time and did not have the energy or desire to look at his watch. He saw the Ambulance make the wide right turn and back into the bay…he grabbed a gurney and called to the others waiting—Early, Brackett and Dixie, "They're here."

The doors of the ambulance swung open and Gil Robinson pushed the gurney toward Roy. The young girl was barely breathing and needed immediate attention. Roy caught a glimpse of Johnny, lying on the ambulance bench in his stokes. "He looks too pale." Roy thought. Dr. Brackett took the young girl and Dixie directed them to Exam Room 3. Roy jumped in the ambulance and looked down at his injured partner. "He's stable, Roy." Gil said, "Let's get him on a gurney and get going, huh?"

Roy cleared from his daze and pushed Johnny toward Gil who had grabbed the waiting gurney. Dr. Early was quick to begin checking Johnny's pupillary responses as they moved him to Exam Room 4. There was a flurry of activity. Gil filled Early in on Johnny's vital signs and his LONG ride to the hospital—it had taken them almost two hours to get down the canyon roads! Roy thought of the girl and what Brackett had told Johnny earlier "She will drown in her own fluids or bleed to death in the next hour, Johnny. Isn't there a faster way to get her out of there?" Johnny had found a faster way to get her out, but not a faster way to get her to the hospital. He knew Johnny well enough to know the young paramedic would blame himself if things did not go well with the girl. Roy thought he should call Joanne…she may hear about some of this on the news and wanted her to know he was okay, and he knew that she would pray for Johnny, too. "The more people praying for him the better." Roy believed.

Brackett tried to save the girl, but she went into respiratory arrest and then her heart stopped. They defibrillated several times, but there was no bringing her back. She was pronounced dead at 8:42pm (20:42 hours). Brackett tore off his gloves and determined that he was going to be sure that a certain paramedic would survive the night and crossed the hall to where he was being cared for.

As he entered, Dr. Brackett heard his friend, Dr. Early calling for all the usual tests and x-rays. He sidled up to Dr. Early and nudged him. Joe glanced back and knew that Kel's presence meant that the girl had died. Though that saddened him, he was more concerned for John Gage now. This young man had been through hell (he was remembering back to what he had seen on the x-rays and medical reports, not to mention he'd spent the day trapped in a car with two dying people). Joe intended that he would help him find some peace, somehow. Dr. Brackett and Dr. Early both looked up as that portable x-ray machine entered the room. They shooed everyone out, especially Roy, and stepped into the hall.

"Doc?" Was all that Roy could manage.

"Roy, Johnny is strong. His pupils are sluggish, but reactive and he hasn't lost too much blood. I think his chances are pretty good depending on what we find in the x-rays. Let's just think good thoughts, huh?" Joe Early told Roy, and the rest of the group as well.

The men of Station 51 stopped by the hospital once they were able to get back to the city. Cap stopped by the nurse's station to see Dixie. When she was not there, he went down to the coffee lounge. He found everyone he needed—Dixie, Roy, Dr.'s Brackett and Early. "How's John and the girl?" Hank asked the full room.

"Captain Stanley, I'm sorry, the girl didn't make it. But we are waiting on x-rays for Johnny and we will know more soon." Dr. Brackett offered.

Finding no relief in the answer, Cap stood stoically and stared at the floor. He had not lost a man yet…he would be damned if John Gage was the first. He said a silent prayer for the man and stepped out to update his other crew members on the news.

Johnny thought he could hear noises, but he wasn't sure. He knew that his head hurt and, well he hurt all over. He could smell antiseptic and felt a chill. "I am in a hospital." Johnny thought as his mind drifted back to his youth…

Johnny enjoyed his Aunt. She was very much like his mother in her temperament and outlook on life. She told Johnny that she was sorry that she had not been there for him when his mother and father died. She felt terrible that she had let bigotry keep her from her sister's funeral and caring for her nephew. Knowing that his Aunt had enough guilt, he decided to continue the "secret" about what happened to him at the orphanage and in foster care. He did not want to add to her burden and, besides, it was in the past now.

It was February in his junior year of high school when he finally decided his career path. He was running through the park one afternoon when he was flagged down by a woman who was crying and screaming hysterically. She was yelling something about her children having fallen in the water. When Johnny looked, he saw a small head bobbing up and down in the flowing river below. Johnny yelled for someone to call the police and he ran down the path to catch up with the tiny floater. When Johnny jumped in the cold water, he didn't even notice…he swam out to the boy and caught him just as he was about to go under again. Johnny pulled him to the side of the river and laid him down. The small child was crying and coughing when the mother arrived with the police.

Johnny suddenly realized two things…that he was very cold and that the women had said "children"—not just one child. He began to get up to go find more children when he collapsed. He woke to find two fire men leaning over him and telling him that the children were fine and that he would see them at the hospital. In the hospital, Johnny was greeted by someone from his past. The kind doctor who had treated him in Florida and Oklahoma was at his side once again. "Boy, you get around, dontcha, doc?" Johnny chided.

"I guess I can say the same about you, son." The Doctor retorted. The doctor explained to Johnny that he had been on "mission trips" to the Reservations each year of his life as a doctor. He felt it was his "Christian Duty" to help others who were less-fortunate. He shook his head as he examined Johnny. He knew the boy was in trouble the last time he saw him, but the doctors at the clinic would not let him call the police.

"You've had it rough, huh, son?" the Doctor asked the young man.

"No worse than some other kids I know, doc." Johnny answered and thought he liked the way the man called him "son". "Things are better now that I am with my Aunt. I am on the track team, the yearbook committee and I will graduate near the top of my class next spring." Johnny continued.

"Well, that's pretty great then. You are going to be okay…just a little hypothermia. You saved that boy's life, you know. If he had been in the water even another minute or two…well, you saved his life."

"I just did what I felt I had to do, doc. I'm no hero. People should just help cuz' it's the right thing, like you going to help on the "rez". You just do it, right?" Johnny asked as he thought maybe one day he would be a doctor like this dark haired man before him.

"I guess you are right, son. Well, I have sick people to see…you are going to be okay. You can go home tomorrow morning. And, Son, one more thing…" the doctor continued.

Johnny raised his eyes to meet the older man's gaze…"I don't want to see you as a patient again. Okay?"

"That's a deal, doc." Johnny laughed and they shook hands as the doctor went on his way.

Later that evening, one of the firemen who he met earlier that day came to visit him at the hospital and told him that he was very brave to have jumped in the cold river to save the drowning boy. Johnny asked the man if that was any different than running into a burning building to rescue someone. The man just laughed and said he did not think it was so different. Johnny admired the courage in the man before him, and knew that one day he would be a fireman—no matter how dangerous the job…Johnny knew that was what he was called to do.

Johnny felt that being a fireman, saving other people's lives, and helping kids like him would be a marvelous way to honor his parents' memories and make them proud.

TBC