A/N: The Ballad Of The Gunslinger And The Cat, now with over 9000% more plot and emotion. Basically, this is the serious chapter.
Chapter Nine: Shatter
I woke up, and the first thing I knew was that Vincent Valentine was going to be murdered. And that I was going to be the one doing the murdering. I knew this because Shera was looking down at me with a concerned and motherly expression on her face.
After some shouting and screaming and a few waffles for breakfast, I got to the heart of the matter. He Who Should Really Jump Off A Cliff Already had told Cid about my little episode on the boat. Cid's fatherly sense tingled, and just like that, I was prohibited from leaving the house. Gawd. I'm a frickin' ninja, guys. So what if I was having a teeny-tiny emotional breakdown? I can still go to the goddamn shop without bursting into tears.
Not that being stuck in a house with Cid all day was all that bad. He might stink like a horse, but the man knows how to entertain. He sat there, a pen in his mouth and his feet on the table, telling me how sure he was that Cloud and Tifa were having secret sex. He told me about how he'd caught a punk scribbling on the back of his garage, and how loudly the kid screamed when Cid hung him by the underwear from the Weapons Shop sign. And he told me about the time that the shop had run out of tea, and he'd had to go to Junon for a pack. (He also brought back some of Junon's famous whisky. I was planning on stealing it).
Eventually, though, he wanted to talk about me. And it didn't go well.
"So, brat. Vincent tells me that you ran away from Wutai. What the hell happened?" he asked gruffly. Shera was sitting in the background, listening in. All of a sudden, I felt claustrophobic.
"I had an argument with Dad. Nothing major." I smiled.
"Nothin' major? You got mixed up with Reeve and Vince, went monster hunting, and risked a burning ship over nothin' major? Give me some credit here, runt."
Crap! What happened to the kernel of truth rule? Were more of my epic ninja powers deserting me, or was Cid just more shiny and golden than I thought he was?
"Uh...Just drop it, okay? I don't wanna talk about it." I frowned. I was trying to play the 'I'm under bed rest on your orders, show some sympathy' card.
"Okay, kid. Next question: You broke Reeve's nose when last you saw him, but you're still doing his dirty work. Why?" he asked. There was something of a growl creeping in.
"Basically, they made me. I was gonna try and get over to Teef's and get a job in Edge or something, but I got cornered by monsters and Vince saved me and then I owed him and then Reeve came and now I'm Vinnie's hostage." I said, choking it out quickly. Unfortunately, Cid picked up on the one thing I was hoping he didn't pick up on. Lousy jock-strap airship-monkey.
"Cornered by monsters? What, those wimpy Wutai things? You took down half of Deepground, kid. No way were you gonna get offed by some scrubs. 'Specially not since monsters have been getting' weaker lately." Now he was definitely getting angry. I needed to throw him off, or I'd actually have to tell him the truth.
"I left my weapon at home, y'know? I don't wear old-man slacks with massive pockets like you." My grin was fake; so was my confidence. I could almost hear the drop of sweat dripping down my scalp.
He got up, upending both the table and the chair that he'd been sitting on. Shera made a little noise, half-way between a sigh and a scream. There was metaphorical steam coming from Cid's ears, and as he paced towards his weapons rack, I almost thought he was gonna take out his spear and gut me with it. And gutted Yuffie is not as tasty as gutted salmon.
Instead, he rooted around on the table next to the rack, then threw something at me with a huff. It hit me in the face, flapping like an angry bird. I gulped, and looked down. It was a newspaper.
"Read the first page, Yuffie." Cid growled, deadly serious.
"Uh...Edge Broncos make the semi-finals in the Spira Cup?" I read. Maybe Cid really was going senile.
"Other side, runt."
"Oh." I muttered, flipping the newspaper over. What I saw made my heart sink. "Heir of Wutai denounced for attempt on the King's life. An arrest warrant has been issued on behalf of the Wutai State, and a reward of 1,000,000 gil has been issued. The King is currently in emergency care..."
Wait, what? A million gil? For my sexy little ass?
"Yer all over the frick'n news, runt. Newspapers, radio, TV, the whole schebang." he said, picking the chair up. He spat his pen out, put a cigarette in his mouth and lit it, with the same dark style as one of those greasy private eyes you see in TV dramas. Shera looked at him disapprovingly, but realised that even fluffy bunny slippers wrath paled in comparison to the foulness of Cid's mood right now.
I busied myself looking at the paper. Today's date. Probably took my asswipe of a dad that long to decide how many of his middle names he was gonna put on the arrest warrant. He has, like, fifteen of the damn things.
"So, wait. You're putting yourself at risk by housing me?" I asked, the gears in my head whirring so loud I could hear them. I liked the sound. It distracted me from the creeping urge to be sick all over my shoes, the painful constriction of my heart and the gasping, desperate need of my lungs for more air.
"Pah. I put myself in more danger flyin' my dang airship, and I do that every goddamn day." Cid sniffed. He hadn't denied it. My head was starting to get heavy.
"You...You don't have to put yourself at risk for me, y'old geezer. I'm a ninja, and...and..."
My breath hitched. What was I talking about? Ninja were supposed to be strong and tough and detached. Ninja didn't throw up or cry into Vinnie's cloak or crack up in the heat of battle. Ninja were always on the run from someone, always ready to be captured by enemies.
People always say that things 'hit them' at times like this. Nothing hit me. It crept across the floor like smoke, wafting up into my lungs and settling in my blood. It travelled like snake venom, silent and painful, to my brain.
I wasn't a ninja anymore. As soon as the thought came into my brain, I knew it was true. I could feel bits of myself falling away, the bits that I'd wrapped up in my identity as a ninja. The confidence, the bravery, the deep-seated belief that whatever happened I'd be okay- it all collapsed. And all I could do was stand and shiver.
"Who the hell do you take me for, Yuff?" Cid said, getting right up in my face and snapping me back to reality. My feet were on the ground, my hands were balled into fists, and Cid was as pissed as a scalded cat.
"I'm Cid freaking Highwind. You honestly think I'm gonna let them touch a goddamn hair on your goddamn head? You're as good as family to me, runt, and don't you forget it." His voice was suddenly soft, and I could feel his gloved hand in my hair. I couldn't say anything. After a second or so, Shera shifted up to Cid and laid a hand on his arm. He got the message, and drew away. They left the room, and all I could bring myself to do was sit on the floor.
I was still on the floor when Vince came in. I'd long forgotten how angry I was that he'd told Cid and Shera about the boat episode. I'd almost forgotten our friendly animosity. All I could remember was that he was Vince, and Vince never lets a girl down, even if he has to get back to them after being locked in coffins and stuff.
"Vinny. I'm in trouble, aren't I?" I asked. My voice didn't sound like me. He looked at me. He was so much taller than I was, even when we were both standing up, and now he seemed like a giant because I was on the floor and he was still standing. He had no choice but to look down on me.
"Yes, Yuffie. You are in trouble." he said. His voice, usually so smoky and dark and Vinny-like, was clear.
"What? You're supposed to be comforting and supportive and stuff." I pouted. Like a spoiled child. "Well, whatever. You're just...Just...fat."
"...Fat?" His eyebrow had raised.
"Yeah. We all know that the only reason you wear leather is to restrain your bingo wings, and once you take it off, you just flob out like a big ol'..uh...hecteyes." It shuddered, and I let it drop.
"...As I was saying, Yuffie, you are in trouble, but it is not as serious as it appears." he went on, dropping to one knee. His hair fell in his eyes, and he brushed it away without even thinking about it.
"How? This is pretty much as bad as I've ever had it, Vinny." I had the urge to reach out and touch his cheek, just to check...but check what? I didn't know.
"Remember who you are."
I thought about it. I was Yuffie. Yuffie the Blank. Not Yuffie the White Rose of Wutai, because I'd been kicked out. Not Yuffie the ninja, because ninjas were so much more epic than I was. Just Yuffie the Blank. There was a perverse pleasure in it.
"You're a member of Avalanche, the group which helped save the world. Thrice. You were there at Sephiroth's defeat, there at the battle with the Weapon in Edge, and there in the war against Deepground." he went on. "You've got a reputation, Yuffie- as one of the most dangerous people on the planet."
"How does that help me, Vince? I'm not one of the most dangerous people on the planet. I'm all..." I protested. He ignored me.
"On top of that, you have a one-million-gil bounty, which is exactly the wrong price to put on your head."
"...How'd you work that out?" I asked.
"People will wonder why it's so high. And they'll associate reward with risk. Your reputation is dangerous, and you have a bounty reserved for the most dangerous criminals. Combine that with the fact that you're one of the saviours of the world, and not a lot of people are going to want to take this bounty. They'll either be too scared to pursue you, or they'll be on your side." he said, building momentum. When he put it like that, I felt a little better about it.
"On top of which, you've recently been seen travelling with another dangerous person- me. I'm a known ally, I'm highly trained, and I, too, have a reputation as being someone not to cross." he went on.
I couldn't resist breaking into a smile. I didn't feel all that useful at the moment, but I had Vince. Vince was practically un-killable, a lunatic and murderer. No one was gonna mess with him.
"You also have friends in high places, namely the Commissioner of the WRO. Reeve's battling your side in the legal arena, as well as in less-than-legal markets." Vince said, almost smiling at the last part.
Something occurred to me. Cid was normal, he'd asked right away. But Vince...
"Vince, how long have you known the truth? You never did ask me about why I ran away from Wutai."
He frowned. "From the day you ran off to hunt monsters. I called Reeve as soon as I found you, because there was obviously something. Reeve may be the arbiter of peace and rebuilding now, but do not forget that he was once king of spies; he worked his way into our group with nothing more than a robot and a stuffed moogle. He has sources in Wutai."
I groaned. And Vinny had been sparing my feelings all this time. Never had him down as Mr. Sensitive.
"As soon as he knew, he started making plans. One of the reasons we were forcing you to travel with me was so we could keep an eye on you. Reeve's the one circulating the reports of us travelling together to ward off bounty hunters." he explained.
I wanted to thank him for looking out for me, for putting himself in danger for my sake. For respecting my feelings about the whole thing by not telling me. But somehow, I just couldn't do it. The wan light falling from the kitchen's solitary lightbulb didn't even reach his face, and he just seemed so far away.
"Yuffie. You are in the best of hands. You are part of Avalanche, and we will allow no-one to harm you." Vince. We. He'd finally started to think of himself as one of the team. It almost made me smile. Vinny was gonna be all right. Looking back, I guess I was just distracting myself from my own troubles, but it still made me feel warmer inside.
His hair fell over his eyes again. I reached my hand out, and bridged that chasm between his dark face and me; I brushed his hair (so close to my mother's) away, allowing my fingers to linger on his cheek. I couldn't feel his skin through my numb fingertips, but it was okay. I leant my head forwards and rested it against his shoulder. I idly thought what a good pillow his mantle made.
I awoke to the sound of sizzling bacon. I was wrapped in Vinny's spare cloak again. He'd done it. I could tell, because it was awkwardly tight, as if he hadn't known what he was doing. Cid grumbled as he shuffled around the kitchen, flicking the switch for the kettle (I could already tell the difference between that and the other switches, due to the copious amounts of tea in Cid's crap-shack), buttering toast and doing something to make the bacon spit. Every so often, he'd break into a volley of subdued cursing. Good old Cid.
What I didn't expect was the sound of a plate being put right next to my head. Seconds later, it was followed by another clink and a splat. Cid swore again and walked away. I pulled my head out of Vince's coat and checked the tributes. I almost wished I hadn't. Cid may be a shiny golden god, but his eggs and bacon breakfast combo looks like a pile of crap. And the glass of OJ that he'd put down and spilled looked like it was fresh from the cement mixer.
Still, food's food, and breakfast in bed (or on the floor) is better than none at all. I pulled myself upright, looked around blearily, picked up the plate and put it on the table. Vincent and Shera were already sitting down, each of them with a plate of Cid's cooking and the cement OJ. Shera was already eating, but Vinny looked like he was wanted to shoot it, just to make sure it wasn't alive. Eventually Cid took his own plate and sat down. I'm pretty sure he was thinking of putting his feet on the table again, but Shera was shooting warning glances.
Actually, Cid's cooking wasn't that bad. It was just greasy enough to give you a feeling of guilty pleasure, without being so greasy that you threw it back up. As I shovelled mine in (table manners are for dorks and Vincent), the others began a conversation.
"So, Vamp. How was your little monster hunting trip yesterday?" Cid asked, his mouth full. Gawd, I love the old fart.
"I was unable to kill any, but I have the data that Reeve required. It backs up a theory that we rather hope is not the case." Vince said. His plate of food was untouched.
"Hm? What theory is this?" Shera asked. Science was her thing, after all.
"It's easy to explain in simple terms, but hard to justify..."
At that point, I decided not to listen. Geekspeak is so not equal to breakfast when it comes to my attention.
"If I told you that there may be a direct link between myself and Sephiroth, would you believe it?"
Someone dropped their glass. I looked down and found out it was me. So much for not paying attention. I was gonna drink that OJ, as well. Cid got up, cuffed me around the back of the head, got a cloth and cleaned the spill. The conversation resumed.
"Well, I suppose that genetically, there is a chance of lineage..."
"What Shera means is that Hojo was a little fugly to be that pretty boy Sephiroth's dad. And seeing as you're the only other guy with a shot at banging this Lucrecia woman..."
Shera punched Cid, and Vince shot them both a glare. They settled down. This was starting to get interesting.
"I don't mean in terms of genetics. Merely in terms of role. What I saw yesterday supports the theory that Jenova, the so-called 'Calamity From The Skies', was an entirely natural phenomenon." he went on.
"Entirely natural? Sorry, but don't most natural things come with heads?" I asked, mouth full of bacon. Vince shot me a look, and I swallowed. Without my inner ninja, his death glare was a trillion times more dangerous.
"The 'from the skies' part is what interests us. We believe that Jenova is not from this planet; Cetra records tell us that much. We also believe that the Northern Crater was created when Jenova, or the comet containing Jenova, impacted the planet."
"Skip this boring crap and tell us the ending, Vamp." Another punch from Shera. If she had her slippers, he'd be dead.
"We also believe that Jenova is, at least in part, biological. Which implies a biological creature capable of travelling through space under its own power."
He looked at us, in that Vinny way that means 'I have just spelt something out for you in basic terms. It should be immediately obvious what my point is, despite the fact that what I spelled out has nothing to do with anything.' After a while, he gave up.
"We know of only one type of creature capable of that. The Weapons. More specifically, Omega Weapon."
"You have got to be freaking kidding me. No WAY was Jenova an Omega Weapon." I spat.
"Unfortunately, there's a possibility that it was. Jenova and Sephiroth sought to become Gods of the planet by fusing themselves with the Lifestream- in other words, absorbing it. The Omega Weapon was the only other known creature with that capacity. In addition, Omega Weapon was supposed to bring our planet's Lifestream energy to another planet and colonise it, meaning it would have had to override another planet's Lifestream in order to carry out its purpose. That's suspiciously similar to Jenova's aim." Vince went on. Shera's jaw had dropped.
"So, wait. Jenova and Sephiroth were just another planet's takeover attempt? Bullcrap, Vamp. Ain't no way in hell." Cid spat. His cigarette quivered dangerously on the edge of his lips.
"Of course, there were differences, too...The theory is currently that Jenova was another planet's Omega Weapon, but that it was malfunctioning in some way. Almost like a cancer. If we liken Jenova to a cancer cell, with the ability to grow back and reform when scattered, it makes a good deal of sense." Vince went on. He was the only one among us who was impassive. "Sephiroth may be likened to Chaos; his mission was to return as many souls to the Lifestream as possible, probably with the impact of Meteor. Those would then be absorbed by Jenova, the dominant partner of the pair. That's the theoretical link between he and I."
I was hearing it. I was understanding it. And yet, all I could think was that it was way too early in the morning for this.
"So, how do frickin' mutant monsters back this crap up?" Cid asked. His bacon was forgotten. I considered stealing it.
"The monsters...They had Geostigma."
The table fell silent.
"If Jenova was another planet's Omega, and it was in space, it would mean that it had absorbed and therefore still contained the Lifestream of that planet. That Lifestream would be released when Jenova was destroyed, just like our Omega Weapon. We destroyed Jenova in a place surrounded by our own planet's Lifestream." Vince carried on. "Geostigma is Jenova's 'memetic legacy', and can be traced directly to her- or, rather, it. All life comes from the Lifestream, even monsters. If new, mutated monsters are being born, and Geostigma is present at birth..."
"Then Jenova's Lifestream and our Lifestream are mixing. The monsters are from Jenova's Lifestream, being born on our planet...The takeover attempt isn't over. It's only just beginning." Shera finished. Her lip quivered. The ashes from Cid's fag fell on the floor.
Jenova Doomsday Theories cereal- the depressing way to start your day. Coming to a planet near you.
A/N: Well. There we go. Original theory over! The story takes a serious tone here to coincide with Yuffie's emotional breakdown- the lack of jokes is intended to mirror that breakdown. I promise things'll cheer up soon. And, yes. This chapter was late.
On a side note, the whole theory is a kind of reference to FFIX's plot- the whole Gaia being subsumed into Terra via souls (Lifestream?) being replaced. This story now has layers; fear its onion-ey goodness. Recurring themes in Final Fantasy for the win.