Sharing in Grief

Father or Brother

c.1060 TA

Once Legolas had also gone to bed, the King and Queen laid next to each other still awake, but tired and still partially weighed down by their own loss. "Something angered you tonight." Oiolairë said reading her husband correctly.

"Yes," Thranduil said. "It was Haldir's aunt, and she was…"

"Irksome?"

"To put it mildly. She finds us heartless cowards who teach their children disobedience, and she wants to keep Haldir and Orophin so they can work for her."

Oiolairë stiffened slightly. "So she did come for them."

"Yes," Thranduil answered. "It angered me. I do not understand. People find me greedy for no purpose, but then someone like that comes along and wants to use her nephews to help her pay for her own children."

"How many does she have?"

"Haldir said five."

Anger rolled through his wife then as well. "I suppose that would be difficult but I think we would have that many if we could, and somehow someone like that-."

"I know," Thranduil said softly, her words voicing the same that his had said earlier. He paused, thinking over the night's events again. "Haldir impressed me though." He said. Oiolairë glanced up at him.

"He did?"

"Yes, he stood up to her quite well, probably better than many adults would have."

Her mind searched through his thoughts for the events and he let her see them. "It was impressive." She said. "On his part. I rather want to strangle his aunt."

"Join the army." He said. "Everyone who heard her at all tonight was thinking the same."

"I suppose that is well in case she does try to come back."

"Mhm." Thranduil said.

"I do not understand," Oiolairë said, her voice close to breaking. "Why do such things happen? Why do three elflings lose their parents and have a greedy aunt to take their place? And why does that same aunt have five healthy children and we have one?" She sat up, face buried in her hands. Thranduil sat up and pulled her into his chest where he felt tears start to gather.

"We cannot do that." He said softly. "I do not understand either. But we cannot let ourselves do this."

"Haldir and his brothers never deserved that." Oiolairë sniffed. "And if any of them, Legolas should have been the less healthy for we were more unstable at the time."

"I know," Thranduil said, "We have thought as much before."

"But his aunt gets five? Why does she and Fëanor get so many and not us?"

"Love," he started.

"Tell me," Oiolairë said, more tears escaping.

"I do not have any answers." Thranduil said, one tear escaping his own eye. "No one has come to me with any answers for me to give. There was no reason that any of them should have died. Not that I know of. Perhaps someone has an answer but I cannot find them without leaving Ennor." Oiolairë buried herself further into his arms, not that he really minded. But his thoughts were just as troubled.

Perhaps one day he would find an answer. He hoped it was soon, for Oiolairë's sake anyway.

They woke up the next morning groggily. They simply lay there for a few minutes before one of them finally spoke. "I thought about something." Oiolairë said. "You had been thinking a lot of Haldir's problem with being father instead of brother. I know we cannot take anyone's place, but there must be a way we can make his load feel lighter."

"You have done a lot of that yourself- with Rúmil anyway." Thranduil said. "But you are right. I will think on it as well. Perhaps a solution will present itself."

Haldir woke with more grogginess than anyone though, having been drugged. He woke to find Rúmil crying and he stumbled out of bed and stared down into the crib at the child. Rúmil saw him and reached his arms up. Haldir sighed and picked him up, still not entirely awake. He sat back down on the bed, unsure what to do. Orophin walked looking just as tired into his bedroom as well.

"What's wrong?" He asked. Haldir shrugged tiredly as Orophin sat next to him. Both of them leaned up against the headboard as Haldir tried fruitlessly to calm the baby. Finally, he started singing softly, something his mother used to sing to him. Orophin leaned his head on his shoulder as he too recognized the song. It worked, however, and Rúmil slowly stopped crying and fell back asleep. Orophin had already fallen back asleep and Haldir was too tired (and too drugged) to do anything but.

"Where are they?" Legolas asked his parents as they ate that morning.

Thranduil glanced at the door, but when no one appeared he shrugged. "Well, after the incident last night I might have drugged Haldir. They are all probably asleep still."

"Should I get the baby?" Oiolairë asked. "He might wake them up and after all they may need the sleep."

"I suppose, if he has not woken them up already." Thranduil answered, eyes narrowing at Legolas as he said it.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"He remembers all the times you woke us up after some really long nights." Oiolairë said off-handedly as she got up and went to the children's room.

Legolas blushed slightly looking at Thranduil. "I suppose I should be sorry."

"You will be." Thranduil said.

"When?" Legolas asked.

"When you have your own." Thranduil answered.

Oiolairë caught her breath as she entered Haldir's room. The three of them piled on the bed, now asleep, was both amusing and adorable and concerning all at the same time. Her heart melted and she walked over to the bed, her hand resting on Haldir's forehead gently before she pried the baby just as gently out of his arms. The babe stirred but snuggled into her arms. She grabbed a blanket and wrote a quick note where Haldir would find it. Then she carried Rúmil back to where Thranduil and Legolas were waiting.

"It looks like he did wake them up for a few minutes. Somehow they managed to get him back to sleep and I found them all piled on Haldir's bed asleep again." She said softly rocking the baby.

Legolas' mouth raised slightly while Thranduil appeared curious. "All of them?"

"Mhm," Oiolairë said.

"I guess Orophin heard and went to see what was going on and they all just kind of fell asleep." Legolas said.

"Well, Haldir must have done something. He and Orophin were both up against the headboard. Orophin's head was on Haldir's shoulder and Rúmil was in his arms."

"That doesn't sound comfortable." Legolas said. Oiolairë shrugged.

"They looked quite at ease."

Thranduil sighed. "Well, I have Council. So do you, Legolas." Legolas grimaced but followed his father dutifully out the door and toward the Council chambers. Oiolairë looked thoughtfully down at the child.

"What are we going to do?" She asked herself. There just had to be something.

After Council that morning Thranduil retreated to his study. He sat at his desk and held a quill over an empty scroll, thinking. Finally he put the quill down and started writing.

Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel,

I believe I have to inform you of a situation that includes most specifically four of your subjects. It is to my knowledge that one recently died in childbirth and her husband, Nemirben, Sailed soon after leaving three children behind. Haldir, his eldest, had been staying here in Greenwood until he got word from his father and we insisted he return when all was over with his younger brothers as they had no means to support themselves.

Apparently, when he returned, his father passed responsibility to Haldir but told him there were plans already in place. These plans included giving Haldir, only 100, a job and separating the other two brothers between their aunt and a stranger. Haldir told his father that he had also made plans, and though hesitant, his father eventually agreed and gave his blessing to Haldir before he left. His aunt was less excited and tried multiple times to stop them.

This would all be blown over, except that last night his aunt, Tauredhiel, proceeded to come to my Palace. Beyond trying to get me to hand over the three of them, she also decided to insult me in front of everyone. I would be inoffended, except she also slapped and tried to beat Haldir for what she thought was disrespect. According to him, it seemed she wanted to bring them back for her own gain. I cannot confirm that, but the way she reacted when Haldir accused her made it seem obvious.

She seems to want Haldir to work to provide extra income, and Orophin to become a caretaker for her own children. She was still going to send Rúmil off to someone else. She said that if he did not come, she would take her case as prime guardian before you to make me turn them over. Haldir countered by saying if she insisted on doing such he would claim refuge here.

All might still have been fine if she would have turned and left then, but she proceeded to grab him to keep him from saying anything. He fought her off and told her she had an hour to clear the Palace. That was when she insulted me. I may have drawn my sword, but nothing more and no intention beyond trying to scare her away. Then Haldir turned and went ahead with claiming refuge. I never fulfilled the claim before she attacked Haldir physically. My guards dragged her out and have set her on the road home.

In case it is not clear, I will not give up the children without a fight. I have no intention of letting them return until Haldir sees fit to do so, which at the moment is twenty-five years from now when he is of age. We have more than enough means to raise him and his brothers here. I do not want to fulfill his claim of refuge unless it becomes necessary, but if there is any more coming here from anyone trying to forcefully bring them back, or any signs of such a thing occurring I will.

I do request that someone check the children's home as Haldir speculated his aunt might have tried to sell anything she could to make money. He also said one more reason for her wanting to take them in might be because without them there she cannot draw on their inheritance. And if Haldir does not return until he is of age it passes to him.

I hope you take this into consideration.

The Elvenking Thranduil

He sighed, rereading his correspondence before rolling it up and walking out to where the birds rested in between flights. He started singing softly and a raven landed on his arm. "Straight to the Lord and Lady." He said. The raven cawed once and let Thranduil tie the letter to his leg. "To Lórien's leaders." He said and the raven cawed again and took off. Thranduil watched it go and then sighed going back to the Royal Wing.

He found the other two boys had recently awoken and Haldir looked like the effects of the drug were still in him. Thranduil felt a little guilty, but not much. Haldir was rubbing his forehead as if trying to get it out of his system and Orophin threw his brother a concerned look. Thranduil saw Legolas entertaining Rúmil while Oiolairë watched.

After the two older brothers finished eating, Thranduil had a plan formed in the back of his mind. Oiolairë seemed to realize this and after combining their ideas in mind together they both decided on a more final plan. Orophin had joined his younger brother and Legolas on the floor and Haldir had turned and was watching with a slight smile on his face. "Haldir," Thranduil said softly. Haldir glanced at him silently. "Care to take a walk?" Thranduil asked.

Haldir seemed to consider, looking at his brothers again before he stood. He followed Thranduil as they walked out the door. Legolas glanced at them for a second confused but Oiolairë reassured him and told him of their plan in his mind. So he turned back to the two younger ones and set about playing with them.

"What did you want to talk about?" Haldir asked softly as they walked.

This child may be too intelligent. Thranduil thought wryly. "I suppose it could not just be for entertainment?"

"I doubt it, Your Majesty." Haldir said quietly. All three of them were far quieter and calmer than anyone in the Royal family.

Thranduil was silent for a minute. "In this instance you are right." They stopped when they arrived at a small private sitting room. "In here," Thranduil said and they went in and sat down.

"Is it about my aunt?" Haldir asked, his eyes not quite meeting the king's.

"Well I suppose I can start there." Thranduil said. "All I can say on that is that I sent off a letter to Lórien. It should arrive tomorrow." Haldir jerked his head in a nod, eyes still appearing weary after the night before. "That is not really what I wanted to talk to you about."

Haldir's eyes lifted for the first time and mild interest sparked in them. "Then what was?"

Thranduil considered his next words carefully, not wanting to insult the young ellon. It would only make him feel even worse. "Since you came here," he started, "I have noticed that, well, you are going to wear yourself down."

"But I-."

"Haldir, we brought you back so you did not have to be a father."

"What do you expect me to do?" Haldir asked.

"Let us help, well, more than we have."

"What more could you do?"

"Well, for one, you cannot spend all your time teaching them. You still have much to learn yourself."

"But I-."

"And what will you do when you return home and cannot work because you do not know how?"

"Well," Haldir started.

"Haldir, you can do both and not exhaust yourself like you have been." Haldir looked at him with more interest and it seemed a sparkle of hope in his eyes.

"I can?" He asked.

"If you trust us then yes." Thranduil said. "The same people who started teaching you can help teach Orophin. And I think Oiolairë has grown attached to Rúmil and would watch him while both of you learned."

"I am not sure I understand." Haldir said.

Thranduil looked at him, cocking his head slightly. "Something like this: you all wake up, eat, then Oiolairë or perhaps even someone else can watch Rúmil, Orophin can be taught whatever he wants to learn, and Legolas can work with you. Then a break for lunch and a few hours after for you to help them with whatever you want too. Then nothing but dinner and relaxing. There is no need to push yourselves, especially with grief still near. Trust me Haldir, I know." Haldir was thinking the matter over carefully.

Finally he looked up and nodded. "Okay, we can try." He said.