Part Ten: In Which Evie Finally Faces Her Demon

"Hello, Ash," I said, without looking up.

"It's been a long time, Evie."

"Eve, please. I'm not sixteen anymore." I raised my head to look at him. Ash was sitting beside me. Seeing him now, I wondered how I could have mistaken Al's impersonation for the real thing.

He hadn't changed in thirty years, but he appeared completely different to my adult eyes. He was much younger-looking, for a start (anyone over thirty looks like an old fogey to a sixteen year old). He had also updated his wardrobe to a simple, expensive-looking button shirt and black slacks. I realized, as my heart gave a funny little sideways tug, that I really had had a big crush on him as a girl. He was handsome, in an intelligent, nerdy, understated kind of way. The Jeff Goldblum of the demon world. Where Al was flamboyant and crude, Ash had a quiet intensity about him that was much more subtle. When he looked at you, you did feel like you had all his attention, that nothing in the world was more important than you at that moment.

He was examining me seriously as well, and I shivered. His red, goat-slitted eyes were as disconcerting as I remembered. "No, you're not," he agreed. "How long have you known I was watching you?"

I shrugged. "I didn't. I just knew you'd be here. You knew I'd come."

"How do you know I'm not Al?" he asked teasingly.

"You're not nearly furious enough to be Al, not after the other night."

"I saw that. You've made yourself a deadly enemy, there."

"Heh, you saw that...?"

"Indeed. Al couldn't resist telling me what was up, so I came to watch the fun. I couldn't hear what was said, but I must say that I was impressed with how you handled yourself. "

"Yeah...?" I caught myself being flattered, just like in the good old days, and scowled.

"Yes, at least I don't have to worry about Al snatching you. I think you actually managed to scare the daylights out of him. What did you say to him? I've never, ever seen him let someone go before."

"First time for everything," I muttered.

"I can't believe you went to Algaliarept, of all people," Ash continued, grimacing with distaste. "Why him?"

I had to smile at his tone. "What, you're not jealous, are you? How the hell would I know how to find you? I found another summoner and asked for some help. I got Al instead."

Ash grunted, mollified. "You're still an idiot. All you had to do was stand in the line and call me. Now you've got Al to worry about, too."

"First, we moved the fuck away from here as soon as I could feed myself again, and second, it'll be a cold day in hell before I call you for any reason,' I said amiably.

"Yet here you are," he said, just as pleasantly. "And I should probably let you know, hell- or at least the Ever After- is pretty damned cold."

Heh, the more you know. I'd never use that phrase again. "Yeah. Here I am. But not because of you. Long story."

Ash waited for me to tell him, then realized my days of thoughtlessly speaking whatever was on my mind were long gone. His eyes flicked to the scar on my cheek, then to my hair. "What's with the butch haircut?" he asked. "You had such lovely hair."

I couldn't help it, I snorted and burst into laughter. "...asks the man who fucked up my face," I replied.

"You chop off your hair, you alter your face with a charm…yet you don't hide the scar. I'm a little surprised," he continued.

I smiled ruefully. "Sentimental reasons. It was a gift, you know?" I drew a finger down it gently, from force of habit. "Suits me, yeah?"

"Sentimental reasons," he echoed, amused disbelief in his voice. He reached to touch it. I'd been prepared for that and steeled myself not to move. There was a hint of chill as his insubstantial fingers passed through my skin, and he withdrew his hand. We weren't sharing realities, after all. We were just hooked into the same line.

"Yeah, well, I didn't say what those sentiments were." I rested my chin back on my knees, gazing at him thoughtfully. I wasn't even sure what they were myself. Thanks to the amulets, it was as if I was looking at both of us from a position a few feet back, and Ash was a being who had a job to do. He had tortured Greg, true. But he hadn't been gleeful about it, simply...practical. It was a strategy that would have worked on most people. It hadn't worked on me. He didn't have a conscience, but now that I'd met Algaliarept, seen the evident enjoyment he'd taken in killing the unfortunate Blaise and Kevin, well...I had to say that Ash was looking better for the comparison.

I didn't think this conversation was going as he'd planned. What was he expecting me to do, rage at him? Beg him for news of my friends? Toss myself at him out of guilt? Offer to melodramatically do anything to gain their freedom? Heh. Riiiiight.

He tilted his head again to regard me fondly, a simmering intensity to his stare, and I felt my heart lurch again. "I've missed you, Evie. I have so many plans for you."

"Oh, pull the other one, Ash!" I said, rolling my eyes. "You wouldn't even have remembered me if Al hadn't reminded you. As you said, you're a lazy son of a bitch, and I'm not that special."

"But you're still mine. Not his." I noticed he hadn't contradicted me. Bastard. He had forgotten!

I didn't answer him right away, thinking over all my epiphanies of the evening instead. "You're right," I finally replied, and he did a double take.

"I'm...right?" he repeated, stunned.

"You're right. I've been yours ever since that night. Everything I've done, everything I've learned, everything I am, is because of you. You're my motivation, my nightmare, and my muse. You haunt my thoughts, you walk my dreams, and my every decision has you at its heart. No other hand has influenced the course of my destiny more than yours. I hate it and I wish it were different, but it's the truth. And you will haunt me until I die, whether or not I ever see you again. It was a curse and a gift, this scar. I escaped being your familiar by a lucky accident, but I never escaped you."

Ash was silent for a very long time, contemplating my answer with an unreadable expression. "Why, Evie," he said finally, "You've grown up."

"Yeah. And you haven't changed a bit. That's the worst part. That you've touched every aspect of my life, and I was absolutely nothing to you ." There it was, I thought. I didn't really believe that my charm would kill Ash permanently. But he sure as hell wouldn't have forgotten me after that. Maybe that was all I had ever wanted, just...to hurt him. To scar him. To be unforgettable. A special snowflake after all.

Heh. Maybe I was still sixteen in there somewhere. I certainly still wrote shitty emo poetry.

He was silent again, regarding me with an unusual gravity. "Why did you reveal so much to me, Evie?" he asked finally. "Such honest insight into your thoughts is dangerous. You must know I will use it to my advantage."

"Oh, right. You like that kind of information." I wasn't sure why I'd told him, either. These amulets were supposed to make me logical and cold, dammit. Old habits die hard? "I should have saved it to bargain with, I suppose. I wonder what I could have bought with it?" Before he could answer, I shrugged and stood up. "Well, this has been fun, but I have an early plane to catch. So long, Ash."

"You're leaving?"

"Yes. I'm done."

"You're….done," he repeated, looking honestly confused. I think he still expected me to try bargaining for info about my friends. But no.

"Yup. I'm done. With you, with all of this. Done. Moving on." I began walking away.

"Al will be looking for you," he said.

"Yeah, so he said. He was only out to piss you off. And he really doesn't have a reason to spend the effort to track me down, since he said I'm worthless as a familiar. A fucking lunatic. He'll turn to easier pickings. Like you will." I didn't even turn around.

I heard him chuckle. "You keep thinking that," he said, amused. "Al sold me your address."

"Yeah, well, ask him sometime why he sold it to you cheap, before you decide to look me up."

"I'm not worried. If I decide to snatch you, I'll just be sure to knock you good and senseless first," he said lightly. "Until we meet again, Yvette."

I stopped dead with shock, heart suddenly in my mouth again. I whirled around and stared at him, appalled. "How did…? Who the FUCK told you?" I demanded.

His laugh was full of wicked satisfaction. "Lucky guess. Have a nice flight." He dissolved into smoke with a mocking little wave.

Well, shit.