A/N: I know it's been a while since I updated (a whole 5 days according to this), but I finally got the next chapter up. I must say though that I lost most of my motivation due to the lack of reviews I've receive lately. Only three reviews, which is disappointing when it really doesnt take that long to review. It really does afftect the reate at which I update! Also a huge to my latest reviewer... LennonxElize! And one again, abc (alicebrandoncullen, that's now your new nickname) is an absolute sweetheart, and if I got that reaction out of everyone else, there would be no problem!

Chapter 10 – Waking Up

It was dark when I woke up. A dense fog seemed to have settled over my brain, making everything cloudy. Things soon started to become much clearer, and there were two things that I was most aware of. First was the pounding of my head, which felt as if someone was beating a bass drum deep within my head. The second was that there was something in my throat. I tried to lift my hands to see what it was when I heard a familiar voice.

"Bella, it's Dad. It's ok, don't panic, you're in hospital."

His voice sounded distant and strained. I forced my eyes to focus on him where he stood beside the bed. Even in the dim light of the room, I could see the stress and worry etched in his face. I made another movement to my throat, trying to remove whatever was there.

"Wait a minute, hon. Don't touch anything just yet, the doctor will be here soon."

Less than a minute later, the room became much brighter as someone else entered the room and turned up the lights.

"Bella, Can you hear me? It's Carlisle. You were in an accident and we had to put a tube down your throat to help you breathe. I'll remove it now for you, but I'm going to need your help, ok? When I tell you to, I need you to cough for me. Don't nod, just blink twice if you think you can do that."

I had to concentrate on making any part of my body move but I blinked twice.

"Ok," he replied, resting one hand on my chest and the other around the tube. "Ready? Now Bella."

I coughed automatically as the tube slid easily from my throat.

"Good girl," Carlisle said, as he poured a glass of water. "Drink this slowly, so we can try and get some moisture back into your throat. It's going to feel extremely dry and sore. That's normal."

He held the cup out to me and angled the straw towards my mouth. I sipped the water hesitantly, but it felt so good against my raw throat that I began to drink much faster.

"Slowly," he reminded me, his voice remaining silky smooth and extremely relaxing.

I obeyed and soon finished the water. "Better?"

I nodded my head slightly. "Charlie?" I croaked, my voice still raw.

"I'm here baby," he said, returning to the side of the bed.

"Would you mind if I talked to Carlisle alone for a minute?"

He looked apprehensive for a moment. "Sure. I'll just go and grab a coffee and see if I can find Alice to tell her you're awake. She's going to be so relieved."

After he left, I turned back to Carlisle. "Alice is here?"

"She's the one that found you. She saw you crash and got there just before you did. She called an ambulance and waited for them to arrive. When they got to the hospital, she told me what she saw."

I thought of the last thing I saw after the crash, a black and white shape that had ripped the door off the car. Alice was the black and white figure. As that realization came to me, another presented itself, although this time, it was worse.

"She saw how I crashed, didn't she?"I said, praying she remained clueless to my real reason for leaving.

"Yes," he replied. "She said that you seemed to rub your chest before you crashed and I decided to check your file. Why didn't you tell anyone? Bella, even Charlie had no idea when I mentioned it."

I closed my eyes and lay my head back against the pillows, frustrated that my whole reason for not telling anyone in the first place was to avoid hurting them. Now, it seems as though I had actually caused them more pain. They had to find out my condition from a file. "How much does Edward know?"

"Not much. When you were brought in, we needed to give your body a rest, give it a chance to heal, so we put you in a medically induced coma for the last 5 days. I told Alice to avoid Edward until I had a chance to talk to him, to explain what happened. I told her to go and get Charlie, to bring him back here while I went and spoke with Edward. I told him that you had been in an accident, and I had never seen him struggle so hard with his feelings. He so desperately wanted to come – his heart was telling him he should – but he didn't because he thought he'd hurt you more by coming."

"So he doesn't know about the ASD?" I clarified.

"No."

I sighed, relieved about that. "I know that he's your family Carlisle, but I don't want to see Edward. It would kill him if anything happened to me, and I won't do that to him."

"You don't have to worry about that now," he said, putting his hand on mine. "I spoke to your Cardiologist, and your surgery is booked for next week. After that, you can decide what your next move will be. If you decide that you want nothing more to do with our family. Then I promise that we will respect your wishes and not bother you again." Through his compassion, I could see the hurt in his eyes. I knew this man loved me as he did the rest of his family and yet, I continued to cause them all pain. Still, this was far better then if something happened to me.

When I spoke, the loudest voice I could manage was barely a whisper. "Will you do it, Carlisle?"

"Do what?" he asked.

"My surgery," I replied.

"I'm not a cardiologist, Bella. You'd be better off having someone trained in this area do it, like Dr Reynolds."

"It doesn't matter," I spoke with a certainty in my voice. "You're the only one I trust enough."

He stood silent for a moment before answering. "We'll see, I'm not going make any promises. But for now, rest. It's going to be a long and tiresome week, and you'll need your strength."

"Carlisle?" I called out as he headed for the door.

He stopped in the doorway. "Yes?"

"How is he? I mean, how is he really?"

He sighed. "I won't lie to you Bella. He's hurting, almost as much as you are underneath this tough exterior. The only difference is that you have someone you love that you have to stay strong for, whereas Edward…" he trailed off, knowing it had to hurt him to see his son like that. "But he's still with us – he's still alive – and that definitely counts for something."

It hurt me to know that Edward was suffering; it felt like someone had begun tearing at my already damaged heart. But he was still here, he was still going, and there was still hope for the future.

"I'm glad you're here, Carlisle."

He smiled softly. "As am I. Sleep well, Bella." And with that, he turned off the lights and I once again succumbed to sleep.

A/N: So what did you think? I figured the faster I make amends for how mean I've been to Bella and Edward, the faster I'll get reviews... Just remember, I didn't slipt anyone up or kill anyone in this chapter, so please don't let me down and review!