Disclaimer: Please refer to chapter nine, then eight, then seven, then six, then five, then four, then three, then two, and then chapter one.

Author: --she blushes and giggles, holding hand over mouth like the girly, fourteen year old she is-- Thank you for the reviews, folks. I'm really pleased. Yes. If you noticed... I'm not updating as quickly. Why? Honestly? I'm a Gemini. For you people who don't get my zodiac-lingo, that means I was born between May 21, and June 21, and that I get bored extremely easily. I know where I want to go with this story, but I'm not in the mood to write it- I'd rather watch Johnny Depp be beautiful, and read books.

Personally, I blame the fact that Johnny Depp has beautiful cheekbones- yes- I just blamed my laziness on cheekbones. But I can do that! Can't I?...

Point, I'm trying. Give me time, oh loyal people. And sorry for my talking of nothing Twilight related, I'm simply thinking of Mistah Depp today.

Happy Holidays, and Merry Christmas, to those who celebrate it. Drink in moderation, kiss your lovers, and stay safe.

To my darling beta, Luna, don't give up on me.

Chapter Ten: Not About Love

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-x-Last nights phrases, sick with basis, are still writhing on my floor-x-

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I went into lunch with Amy, informing her that Jasper would be taking over her duties to hold my books (only when I said it out loud did I think of how romantically stupid it sounded, he would be carrying my books!). She seemed shocked that Jasper had offered, but told me to give him her thanks.

She then went into a ten minute rant on how the evil "Spires" had given her a detention for chewing gum. She had not been chewing gum, so she claimed. I listened to this story as we sat at the end of a table, me sipping my water, and her making her way through a slice of peperoni pizza, when I saw an odd sight taking place on the other side of the room.

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-x-And it doesn't seem fair that your wicked words should work-x-

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Over the exaggerated limb movements of Amy (such an enthusiastic person, honestly, she was a dear) I saw Alice was arguing with Jasper. She was standing in front of him, her hands on the table, finger splayed flat, and was inches from his face, saying something with fury in her eyes. He hissed something back, his eyes flickering to the surrounding students who happened to leaning towards them, hoping to catch a snippet of the argument.

"Amy, are you done with your food? I'll throw it away for you." I grabbed Amy's tray, despite her protests, and began walking towards the garbage cans, which were placed directly next to the arguing duo. I was ashamed of how curious I was, but it couldn't be helped. I was simply fascinated by anything that was remotely connected with Jasper. I was like a fan-girl, disgusting.

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-x-Given at close range, for the gag, and the bird, and the ammunition round-x-

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Edward Cullen was in the conversation now, speaking quickly, his eyes darting back and forth between them, looking like a dreadful middleman. Like a human trying to rip two fighting dogs apart, although the fight between the duo was definitely not like rabid dogs, ripping each other apart. It looked more cold, than vicious.

I walked closer, taking in the entire scene, and wondering what could cause such an argument. I hoped it didn't have anything to do with me, but I guess it was a selfish thought to think that way- not everything had to do with me.

Deep inside me, I unbearably thought how I wished everything that had to do with Jasper, would with me, as well. I frowned at myself, but continued making my way across the crowded room, holding the tray above my head so it wouldn't meet it's demise against the bodies of one of the students who surrounded me.

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-x-Doesn't seem fair that your wicked words should hurt me-x-

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Suddenly, Jasper's head snapped up to meet my eyes, and then I caught part of a sentence that Alice said, filled with malice and pleading;

"-what you've done!"

It wasn't the secret of life on earth, but it had an effect on me; as though I had found out some incredibly important, yet devastating secret. My knees locked. My legs stiffened, my spine was straightening, when a sudden memory hit me- no, it couldn't be a memory... Couldn't be, I told myself, as I watched it.

Jasper- sitting on my bed, in my bedroom. My hand was locked in his vice-like grip, and he pressed my bleeding finger to his mouth, his icy tongue coming out to trace the dark trail of blood that had-

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-x-Conversation once colored by esteem-x-

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"Grace? Are you alright?"

I was staring at Edward so suddenly, that I was unsure when he had gotten there... Hadn't he been across the table- at least ten feet away?

But my eyes caught Jasper's over his shoulder, and he was staring at me to, his eyes wide- those eyes! The eyes that were so black, so black, before, but were such an orange now.

I took a step back, cocking my head at them, realizing that the entire Cullen-Hale family was standing there, staring at me-

-but I was hardly staring at them, that scene of Jasper licking the blood off my finger kept replying like some horror film that I had been thrown in.

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-x-And it doesn't make sense... no it doesn't seem right-x-

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"Deliver us from evil?" I murmured it as a question, but the affect it had on their faces was startling. Jasper flinched backwards, and his head turned sharply away, as though I had slapped him. It seemed that he did that a lot when I opened my mouth. He began to glare at nothing and everything all at once, his fists clenched tightly until tendons stuck out on his beautiful arms...

Edwards eyes didn't change a bit. They were already a steely gold, and he kept staring at me! Goodness, why was he staring at me like that? He was looking at me as though he suspected I was a criminal- he was looking at me suspiciously.

I'm innocent! My mind shouted it out as I turned my eyes away from his imploring ones, unto the shorter one.

x

-x-"What is this posture, I have to stare at?" that's what he said when I'm sitting up straight-x-

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Alice was shaking her head, and glaring at Jasper, still mumbling things at him. Her little eyes held a fury that I would never want to be on the receiving end of, but her eyes quickly turned back to me, wide. Frightened. Timid. I couldn't stand to look at her either. They were all looking at me as if I had the answers! I didn't know what in heaven or hell was happening to everyone- and what did it have to do with me?

Emmett looked genuinely confused, his eyes flickering between all of us, as if looking for explanation. I felt a little thankful he wasn't just looking at me to explain.

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-x-Turn on my heels, step out of sight, and try to live a lovelier life-x-

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Rosalie simply looked furious. She was the only one, other than Edward, staring directly at me, and her eyes were like coal, and icy. Similar to the ones from my dream. Jasper's eyes.

"Sorry," I mumbled, though for what I had no clue, it was simply a knee-jerk reaction, and I turned to walked as quickly as I could without exciting any attention, out the doors of that stifling cafeteria. I felt like I was choking.

The hallways seemed full, though it was lunch, and I had no idea what business they had in the hallways. Someone much older than myself, and rather tall, pushed me sharply into the lockers, out of their path.

"Stay out of my way!" they shouted at me, and I mumbled an apology, ducking into the first doorway, to get out of the sea of teenagers. If I didn't, I would drown.

I hid myself in the girls bathroom, the stall locked, while I waited for lunch to be over. I tried to distract my tired mind, by reading the walls.

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-x-Not about love, cause I am not in love-x-

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C.C. and D.K. for ever- was written in a crude heart, and I felt a pang of anger at the fact that this C.C. seemed so sure of her love- but that brought me back to Jasper (love? Jasper?)- so I read something else. Hopefully something that I couldn't connect with Jasper.

Jess Ricketts is a slut. Okay- that was pretty harmless- to me- after all, I didn't know this Jess, and it had no connection with what I was trying to keep my mind off of. Of course, the rudeness was shocking, and that thought brought me back to that first look Jasper had given me, which sent me reeling into a state near hyperventilation.

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-x-Cause I am not in love-x-

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Goodness, my reactions to these things- Jasper, I thought firmly, if you're gonna say it, say it- was ridiculous.

I couldn't run from them, because Jasper was going to be coming to my locker to carry my books. I needed to think.

First, my dream last night- the one with the eyes, and the arguing. And then, I saw Jasper licking the blood off my finger! Like some kind of vampire!

I thought of these things for a few minutes, until the bell rang, a shrill sound that cut straight through my sanity, but it was mulled underneath my drowsiness.

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-x-Cause this is not about love, in fact I can't stop falling out. I miss that stupid ache-x-

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I felt so tired, due to my bad dreams, I was sure, that I could hardly try to make sense of anything.

I unlocked the stall, and the instant I stepped out, I noted the fact that perhaps, I was more tired than I thought. The entire room seemed to spin, and I could hardly concentrate of my walking...

Suddenly- it hit me.

"Oh goodness," my breaths came in short, quick spurts, as I leaned heavily against the side of the stall.

Drowsiness, to the extreme. Quick breaths- how long had I been breathing like that?- cold and clammy skin, although I couldn't judge that for myself, I did feel cold. Nausea.

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-x-This is not about love!-x-

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All symptoms of an overdose of Vicodin.

And this drowsiness could lead to a coma. Which could lead to death if I didn't get out of this bathroom, and to a place where someone would find her if she passed out cold.

But the entire room was spinning, and I could hardly keep my eyes open. My breathing was so quick- not as if I couldn't get enough oxygen to my brain, but as if all the carbon dioxide wasn't getting out of me. I wanted to breath out, more than I did in.

Hyperventilation, my mind told me. You're hyperventilating, congratulations! And you're doing it in a bathroom, in a school you hate.

A stupid school, full of stupid people- and smart ones who hate you.

I found myself laughing. It was hysterical, horrible giggling, that sounded more like choking, but I had to express my humor at the fact that once again within two days I had found myself in a life threatening situation. Was I so stupid, as to overdose on a medication that was suppose to keep my limbs from being sliced off?

"Grace?" It was Alice, who already had her cellphone out, and was dialing furiously, her fingers blurring in my tiredness- or was she simply dialing so quickly that I couldn't follow...? It didn't matter. I struggled to listen to her words, but they hardly made sense, to my ears.

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-x-'Cause I choose to listen to that filthy mouth-x-

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"Lean against me, my dad's on his way," she said, but her voice sounded so slow, it was hard to concentrate on it.

"It's an overdose," I tried to say, but the syllables sounded so slow that I couldn't understand them. I scrambled for my pocket, trying to get the pills out, trying to convey the message that she might already even know, she always seemed so knowing.

I got the pills out, but dropped them, and I groaned, prepared to slump for the floor and go on a twenty-minute-grope-fest of the linoleum to find those bloody pills- it seemed horribly reminiscent of the mornings grope-fest- but I saw she already had one in her hand.

"Vicodin. Overdose, yes, thank you. Stay awake with me, okay? I'm just going to help you get out of here. It's the-" She stopped talking suddenly as if she had said more than she wanted, and put her words into actions, pulling my arm around her shoulder. We were similar heights, and she seemed patient with my slow steps.

My eyes were closed by now, and she was murmuring with more urgency, commands for me to stay awake, but it seemed like at times she wasn't talking to me- giving orders to people around us, perhaps?

"Tired," I slurred. "Coma. Death. Deliver us from evil!"

"Yes, in the name of the father, and the son, and the-" She seemed to be praying with me, and I could detect a note of sorrow in her voice, and all I felt was a silent sense of deja vu, before diving into a sea of darkness that was very comforting, but very frightening, all the same.

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-x-Become dialogue, as a diagram of a play for fun. Blood-x-

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Author: I know. You're thinking "This piece of shit is what it took her so long to write? I want my money back!" Even though I am not soliciting money from you- I get the gist.

But please don't say this to me. The last person who flamed one of my stories- I never finished it. I'm the kind of person who feels like, if one person hates what I tried so hard to create, they all hate it, secretly.

The song, in this shitty chapter, was "Not About Love".

-x-Ebony-x-

Post Script: I'm really sorry, too. Honestly. I have just been a little depressed lately. Maybe that's why my character keeps murmuring in my ear and telling me that she should have another accident.. Eh, I don't know. Review. Please?