I realize I made a few careless mistakes in the previous chapter, I do apologize I had began writing at 2am I had a sudden want to write,
so I do apologize if you've noticed (which you most probably have haha)
everyone who has reviewed, I thank you from the bottom of my heart,
alongside the people who have me on their favourites, and alerts thank you all so so much :D
you know the drill, read&review please&thank you.
Once we had walked far enough into the forest I had dropped my jacket onto the floor alongside my shirt and shorts my valuables underneath, no one would find it out here, no one would dare venture out this far at night into the darkness, Jacob had come to pick me up as planned but he wasn't alone, I didn't let my eyes meet Sam's at all, not once because I knew I'd crumble. Jacob had turned around whilst I stripped down but I could feel Sam's eyes watching me,
"do you mind?" I glared over at him once I was down to my underwear, but he stood there obviously not going to turn around, "oh what the fuck ever Sam" I let the fire burn, encouraging it to spread, and as my body shook vigorously and within seconds I burst out of the underwear now into the grey beast I hated so much, sniffing the tree and my clothes I took in the scent.
'Lee' I heard Jacob in my head and I turned towards him,
'Come on come catch me'
'Jacob we're here to patrol not to play around' Sam sighed,
'I'll take the coast of the beach' I wanted to get far away from him as possible,
'Thanks' Sam replied dryly, 'why did you give me the ring back Leah?' I broke my gaze from his and I mentally winced once he brought it up, how stupid was I, I knew he would have sooner or later, but of course Sam was practical, he would wait until he could read my mind, but I wouldn't give him that pleasure,
'Jacob would you give us a minute?' he nodded before taking off,
'I'll just patrol around' and with that it was only me and Sam left,
'I'm going to phase back' I thought, "NO" he growled and I snarled, "What do you fucking mean no? you don't fucking control me Uley" I had never directly spoken to him using 'Uley'
'Leah if you phase back I swear I wil-' but that was all I heard because I now stood naked in front of a black wolf, with black eyes, he was as dark as midnight. Sam's lips curled up and he howled, before phasing back, "Why aren't you just fucking listen Leah? Why do you have to be so difficult?" I turned to pick up my clothes to slip into when they were pried out of my hands and chucked onto the floor, "ANSWER ME NOW" his face was rigid I could tell he was pressing his lips tightly together, because every time he did, he'd get the smallest three wrinkles appearing on his forehead, and one just on the ridge of his nose, "I gave you the ring back…"
"No, why did you phase? Why won't you listen to me?" I gulped; I could feel a lump in my throat, "because I don't want to be here, why would you put me on patrol with you? You know I can't fucking stand you as it is…" rolling my eyes I leant down picking up my clothes, "you still love me Leah" he whispered, and I slipped into my shirt, "yeah I do, but I've lost my respect for you, so I guess that's your answer, that's why I won't listen to you, because you're nothing, you're a child in grown mans body" I hissed through my teeth, and he flinched his eyes closing, "I'm so –so" I lost it and pushed him, "you think a simple apology is going to magically fix it all Sam? I walked in on you fucking my cousin," I croaked out,
"I lost my child because of you, you attacked me and broke my leg, you attacked the mother of your dead sons to save your precious Emily" by this point I couldn't see anything I had fallen to the floor, sobbing my body shaking viciously in response, "my sons?" I nodded, I had found out but acting like I never knew, because we had both wanted twin boys first, and then two girls, we planned everything, every detail. I felt him kneel down in front, "that ring…" I continued moving away from him, "that ring, doesn't belong to me, go start your family with Emily…oh that's right, you can't" I breathed out, I could see the tears fall from his eyes, "hurts doesn't it? Having the thing you want most ripped from you" taking a deep breath I stood up, "you could have fought for me if you wanted to, seeing as you were still able to fuck me, kiss me, and tell me you love me after you imprinted, you could have fought for us, for what we had"
He remained silent, "but you weren't man enough, you just gave in and let everything you once knew go in a second, I hope you're happy with your decision" …silence, he had nothing to say of course, he couldn't, he couldn't justify anything, make himself seem innocent and that's when he rose to his feet still completely naked and turned towards me, the look in his eyes, I'd seen that once before; when he went to protect Emily, I stood my ground if Sam thought I would back down he was terribly mistaken, he took a step towards me, his body was practically convulsing, his face was rigid and hard, we were around two meters apart, I knew if he phased at any given time from the spot he was in, I'd find him on top of me, so I had to act fast.
"Don't you dare" my head span to the side as I saw Jacob, his fists were clenched besides him, and within seconds he stood in front of me, protecting me. I could fight my own battles, I could take Sam if needed, "you don't hit a girl, if you want someone to take your anger out on" Jacob took a huge step his nose was practically touching Sam's, "you fight me," Jacobs voice was cold, Sam's midnight black hues, if looks could kill, my heart would have stopped beating long ago, not that there was much left to it now anyway, it was cracked, shattered, broken, whatever you wanted to name it, Leah was broken beyond repair.
"Leah…" Sam whispered his head dropping his body calming slightly just like his voice did, "I still love you Lee-Lee" and that did it, that nickname hit my weak spot, I clutched my chest, where my heart was as I fell to the ground, sobbing, "you" I breathed in, "you." breathes "have." breathes "no." breathes "right." breathes "to." breathes "call." breathes "me." breathes "that." I managed to say each word after a gasp for air, "you you can't say that, don't say that" I pleaded, hunching over as I felt him slip down in front of me, "Lee-Lee please look at me" I obeyed him and looked up, and he smiled, and then I let my fist collide with his face, knocking him back onto the floor onto his back.
"You took everything Sam, you took everything from me" I croaked out almost inaudible, I could barely hear my own voice, I sat there clutching my knees and rocking, "I gave you everything I had, you took my virginity, you took my heart, you took five years of my life, and you took my babies from me" my bottom lip at this point was quivering, "you took it all and now what am I left with?" I starred into his eyes, "TELL ME SAM WHAT THE FUCK AM I LEFT WITH HUH?" he cringed back shaking his head, "I never meant to do this Leah I swear" I couldn't believe him, he still was acting like the victim in all this.
"I have nothing now, I have no friends, I have no heart, I have no children, no fiancée, I'm not Leah anymore do you realize that? I'm someone else entirely, someone who's been beaten down and broken, someone who was left by herself, her own family abandoned her, I had to get myself through everything, and I could barely stand myself, I have me only, I have nothing, I have nothing to give any other guy, I'm just a burden to you, my family, this pack" I let it all out and before I noticed he leaned forward his lips were an inch from mine before I used all my strength to push him away,
"Fuck you Sam Uley, fuck you, fuck you and your Emily, FUCK YOU" I growled, "WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT IT WILL ALL BE SORTED WITH A KISS, WITH A NICKNAME WITH THOSE THREE WORDS YOU UTTERED? THAT ARE COMPLETE BULLSHIT. THAT WHEN I HEAR IT I'LL JUST FORGIVE AND FORGET?" I hadn't even noticed it began to rain; it was pouring heavily my clothes were drenched as was the ground around us, "you utter that nickname, your lips, or your hands come anywhere near me, or I hear those three words again, I swear Sam, I swear I will kill you" turning I ran towards my house, I had to get away from him, from his lies, from everything I needed to be alone with my thoughts and my thoughts only.