Chapter 10 Oh. My…how did I miss that?
The gardens were beautiful, in full summer bloom with fragrant flowers and candlelit arbours casting shadows in each corner. Willow sat herself in one of the swings that sat beneath the trees.
"What is it you wanted to say William?" he got up and began to pace- like Spike did when he was uneasy.
"I…we, you know I have. I mean to say that I –I." he bit off a curse under his breath. He ran his hand through his hair and sighed heavily.
*Oh boy, this is scarily familiar, is William going to tell me to do a spell before threatening with bottle in face?*
"Sp- William, whatever it is- it's okay." He stared at her for a long minute.
"I- I love you, Lady Willow. Completely and totally and although I am talking above my station I believe that I would be the happiest man in all of history if you would consent to be my wife." The look of quiet desperation echoed in his eyes.
"Oh." She breathed in wonder. Her face lit up *he loves me, he wants to marry me. We could, I could!*
She grasped his hands and replied fervently "There is nothing in the world that would make me happier, I'd be on cloud 9 no cloud 14," she giggled "I am so happy I can't even just wait until I tell-"
*Buffy. Spike.* Willow's world crashed around her ears, leaving her heart shattered in its wake and shaking in the aftermath. Her face fell.
"What is it my love?" William said after a moment
"I can't marry you." Her voice showed her severe heart ache. And she clasped her hand to her chest as her breath became laboured
"Why not?" William asked
*I have to get Buffy back to the future so she can defend the Hellmouth and I need to let you die so you can become Spike and save the world from Angelus.*
"I have obligations." Willow thought she was going to be sick
"To whom?" his voice was soft as he could see the distress in her very bearing.
*Oh this is gonna hurt, for the first time I appreciate how making up stories on the spot is good training, like why we are in the library at 3am on a Sunday or why I have to break the heart of the man I love.*
"My family, I am betrothed to another, a f-friend of my father, a political marriage. We left America to- but my father has found us and myself and Lady Buffy are to travel back to the America's in two days time."
"Two days?" his jaw dropped
"I thought we had at least a month more but he found us rather more quickly than I had anticipated, indeed I had hoped we could be elusive for ever.
She looked up to see William distraught
"Please don't hate me." She begged
He was surprised "Hate you? I could never, why you think that?"
"I never intended to hurt you or- or lead you on. It kills me to have to leave you; I think my heart is breaking." He held a finger to her lips stemming her flow of words
"I need to ask you three questions, will you answer them?"
"Yes." The tears fell down her cheeks at the unfairness of it all
"What is *his* name? You're betrothed?"
"Sir Daniel Osborne." *well why not* she thought wretchedly
"Do you love him?" his eyes bored into hers
"No." she replied honestly, any feeling she had had for Oz left the minute he called for his stuff and refused to tell her where he was.
"D-do you love me?" he held his breath
"With all my heart and soul." He pulled her into his embrace and held her tight. He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead. He pulled back as she asked
"Dance with me?" They stood up and Willow moved into his arms to the music straining from the inside of the grand hall, they danced a Waltz, years before it's time.
Willow slept fitfully that night. Her dreams were snatches of memory of Spike and William intertwined and mixed beyond recognition. William threatening to shove a broken bottle in her face, Spike dancing a waltz, William throwing her on her bed in the dorm and holding her whilst Spike drained her crying about Drusilla and Cecily.
When she woke up, the first port of call was to find that elusive spell ingredient.
Originally the plan had been to wait for the apothecary to order in the ingredient, if it didn't take longer than two months. They had been having so much fun that the idea of staying the full two months was agreeable. However Willow didn't want to spend another day in this time let alone a further month. Having ones heart broken is a definite cure for procrastination.
The very idea of being unable to escape the reality of having her desire for William thwarted by happenstance and circumstance was just too painful.
At that moment, however, it seemed that fates conspired to prolong her torment.
"I am sorry My Lady but we still have none in store. We may be getting a delivery in a fourteen night hence."
"I 'm not waiting two weeks. I am quite desperate, do you know of any hereabouts that stock it?"
"Sorry, some may have it in private stores but the nearest town that may have it is in Leicester, two days ride."
"Two days is passed the full moon." She breathed in frustration and left the apothecary. She blinked in the bright sun and waited for her eyes to adjust, which is why she didn't see the approach of-
"Lady Willow!"
"Cecily." she bit back a groan, she really wasn't in the mood for this right now.
"Well fancy a chance meeting, are you well, you left the ball so abruptly last night."
*Screw being polite- as soon as I am gone she will attempt to sink her filthy paws into William. I will be damned before I give the bitch the respect of courteous society.*
"Look Cecily. I am having a truly crappy day. Meeting you has just dropped it to new levels of sewage, so why don't you take your false smile and piss off, and go simper elsewhere."
Cecily gaped "I beg your pardon?"
"Beg all you like, you ain't getting it. But feel free to gloat you vapid…I'm leaving tomorrow so William will be free. No doubt you will attempt to dig your skanky she-bitch claws into him, but just remember this." Willow spat "No matter how well bred and sophisticated you *think* you are, you are beneath him and will never be good enough for him, ever!" with tears of anger and frustration in her eyes she stalked off down the street with a stunned Cecily staring after her.
"Willow, wait!" Willow turned to see Mrs Ashton hurrying after her
"Mrs Ashton, I-I didn't see you." She struggled to regain her composure
"I know, I was in the apothecary and overheard everything." Willow closed her eyes "And I'm glad someone finally put Cecily Adams in her place." Willow's eyes snapped open and she pinned Mrs Aston
"I thought you liked her?"
Mrs Ashton snorted "Idea's above her station and always mocking my poor William no matter the sincerity of his affections. I am glad be bestowed them on a more willing and welcoming participant." Willow ducked her head
"I know what happened between the two of you, my William and I have no secrets."
"I never meant to hurt him." Willow whispered
"I know that, my dear, a woman can tell plain as day that your heart is aching. The fact that you would forfeit your own happiness for familial loyalty tells me all need to know about you my dear. I like you and I have the ingredient that you desire. I will send my man with it to the Hardwood's directly." She smiled and Willow felt connected to this woman in a way that she had never done to her own mother.
"I love him so very much, I don't want to leave. I want to stay and keep him safe and have his children and grow old with him. I hate that I have to go just when I found my soulmate."
"Fear not Child. The fates decree what will be, we are but pawns in the game of life. Perchance you will be together in a different life. His soul will wait for your own. Carry him in your heart always and take him out every now and then to show how much you were loved."
The gardens were beautiful, in full summer bloom with fragrant flowers and candlelit arbours casting shadows in each corner. Willow sat herself in one of the swings that sat beneath the trees.
"What is it you wanted to say William?" he got up and began to pace- like Spike did when he was uneasy.
"I…we, you know I have. I mean to say that I –I." he bit off a curse under his breath. He ran his hand through his hair and sighed heavily.
*Oh boy, this is scarily familiar, is William going to tell me to do a spell before threatening with bottle in face?*
"Sp- William, whatever it is- it's okay." He stared at her for a long minute.
"I- I love you, Lady Willow. Completely and totally and although I am talking above my station I believe that I would be the happiest man in all of history if you would consent to be my wife." The look of quiet desperation echoed in his eyes.
"Oh." She breathed in wonder. Her face lit up *he loves me, he wants to marry me. We could, I could!*
She grasped his hands and replied fervently "There is nothing in the world that would make me happier, I'd be on cloud 9 no cloud 14," she giggled "I am so happy I can't even just wait until I tell-"
*Buffy. Spike.* Willow's world crashed around her ears, leaving her heart shattered in its wake and shaking in the aftermath. Her face fell.
"What is it my love?" William said after a moment
"I can't marry you." Her voice showed her severe heart ache. And she clasped her hand to her chest as her breath became laboured
"Why not?" William asked
*I have to get Buffy back to the future so she can defend the Hellmouth and I need to let you die so you can become Spike and save the world from Angelus.*
"I have obligations." Willow thought she was going to be sick
"To whom?" his voice was soft as he could see the distress in her very bearing.
*Oh this is gonna hurt, for the first time I appreciate how making up stories on the spot is good training, like why we are in the library at 3am on a Sunday or why I have to break the heart of the man I love.*
"My family, I am betrothed to another, a f-friend of my father, a political marriage. We left America to- but my father has found us and myself and Lady Buffy are to travel back to the America's in two days time."
"Two days?" his jaw dropped
"I thought we had at least a month more but he found us rather more quickly than I had anticipated, indeed I had hoped we could be elusive for ever.
She looked up to see William distraught
"Please don't hate me." She begged
He was surprised "Hate you? I could never, why you think that?"
"I never intended to hurt you or- or lead you on. It kills me to have to leave you; I think my heart is breaking." He held a finger to her lips stemming her flow of words
"I need to ask you three questions, will you answer them?"
"Yes." The tears fell down her cheeks at the unfairness of it all
"What is *his* name? You're betrothed?"
"Sir Daniel Osborne." *well why not* she thought wretchedly
"Do you love him?" his eyes bored into hers
"No." she replied honestly, any feeling she had had for Oz left the minute he called for his stuff and refused to tell her where he was.
"D-do you love me?" he held his breath
"With all my heart and soul." He pulled her into his embrace and held her tight. He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead. He pulled back as she asked
"Dance with me?" They stood up and Willow moved into his arms to the music straining from the inside of the grand hall, they danced a Waltz, years before it's time.
Willow slept fitfully that night. Her dreams were snatches of memory of Spike and William intertwined and mixed beyond recognition. William threatening to shove a broken bottle in her face, Spike dancing a waltz, William throwing her on her bed in the dorm and holding her whilst Spike drained her crying about Drusilla and Cecily.
When she woke up, the first port of call was to find that elusive spell ingredient.
Originally the plan had been to wait for the apothecary to order in the ingredient, if it didn't take longer than two months. They had been having so much fun that the idea of staying the full two months was agreeable. However Willow didn't want to spend another day in this time let alone a further month. Having ones heart broken is a definite cure for procrastination.
The very idea of being unable to escape the reality of having her desire for William thwarted by happenstance and circumstance was just too painful.
At that moment, however, it seemed that fates conspired to prolong her torment.
"I am sorry My Lady but we still have none in store. We may be getting a delivery in a fourteen night hence."
"I 'm not waiting two weeks. I am quite desperate, do you know of any hereabouts that stock it?"
"Sorry, some may have it in private stores but the nearest town that may have it is in Leicester, two days ride."
"Two days is passed the full moon." She breathed in frustration and left the apothecary. She blinked in the bright sun and waited for her eyes to adjust, which is why she didn't see the approach of-
"Lady Willow!"
"Cecily." she bit back a groan, she really wasn't in the mood for this right now.
"Well fancy a chance meeting, are you well, you left the ball so abruptly last night."
*Screw being polite- as soon as I am gone she will attempt to sink her filthy paws into William. I will be damned before I give the bitch the respect of courteous society.*
"Look Cecily. I am having a truly crappy day. Meeting you has just dropped it to new levels of sewage, so why don't you take your false smile and piss off, and go simper elsewhere."
Cecily gaped "I beg your pardon?"
"Beg all you like, you ain't getting it. But feel free to gloat you vapid…I'm leaving tomorrow so William will be free. No doubt you will attempt to dig your skanky she-bitch claws into him, but just remember this." Willow spat "No matter how well bred and sophisticated you *think* you are, you are beneath him and will never be good enough for him, ever!" with tears of anger and frustration in her eyes she stalked off down the street with a stunned Cecily staring after her.
"Willow, wait!" Willow turned to see Mrs Ashton hurrying after her
"Mrs Ashton, I-I didn't see you." She struggled to regain her composure
"I know, I was in the apothecary and overheard everything." Willow closed her eyes "And I'm glad someone finally put Cecily Adams in her place." Willow's eyes snapped open and she pinned Mrs Aston
"I thought you liked her?"
Mrs Ashton snorted "Idea's above her station and always mocking my poor William no matter the sincerity of his affections. I am glad be bestowed them on a more willing and welcoming participant." Willow ducked her head
"I know what happened between the two of you, my William and I have no secrets."
"I never meant to hurt him." Willow whispered
"I know that, my dear, a woman can tell plain as day that your heart is aching. The fact that you would forfeit your own happiness for familial loyalty tells me all need to know about you my dear. I like you and I have the ingredient that you desire. I will send my man with it to the Hardwood's directly." She smiled and Willow felt connected to this woman in a way that she had never done to her own mother.
"I love him so very much, I don't want to leave. I want to stay and keep him safe and have his children and grow old with him. I hate that I have to go just when I found my soulmate."
"Fear not Child. The fates decree what will be, we are but pawns in the game of life. Perchance you will be together in a different life. His soul will wait for your own. Carry him in your heart always and take him out every now and then to show how much you were loved."