Author's note: To those of you reading along with this story, I'm sorry for the delayed update. The next chapter will be posted a lot faster than it took me to post this one! I promise! Wasn't the season finale kind of sad?! Okay, anyway. Thanks for reading! Enjoy! xoxo
(Disclaimer: I do not claim anything related to the characters, ideas, plot, etc. to the television series, One Tree Hill, as my own.)
--
Haley turned her key roughly into the lock at the front door of Keith and Karen's. When the keyhole refused to unlock, she grunted with frustration, on the verge of barreling through the glass windows, instead.
"Haley?"
The startled girl turned to come face to face with Karen Roe, concern written all over her face. Lucas' mother had an incredible gift, for in that instant, despite her worried expression, she calmed Haley a great deal.
"Hey, Karen. I'm… I'm sorry, I just…" she mumbled, fumbling with her words.
"If I didn't know you any better or didn't sign your paycheck, I would've thought you were trying to break into the café," she teased with a hint of a smile. "Come on, let's get inside,"
The graceful woman turned the key with ease and waited for the younger girl to enter before she followed and relocked the front door. The two were forty-five minutes ahead of opening time and began their usual routine of preparing for their slow Saturday mornings, until about 10:30am, that is. After setting up the variety of coffee machines and a fresh new pile of pastries into the front display, Haley plopped herself down onto the stool behind the register. Karen was in the kitchen, pulling out her homemade and refrigerated batter to bake another batch of muffins and scones. She also set a kettle of water onto a burner.
They still had about fifteen minutes until they were officially opened, when Mrs. Roe reappeared to the front with two mugs of hot tea. She handed one of the cups to Haley.
"Don't worry, it's caffeinated. I just thought tea might be better at relaxing you than your normal cup of Joe. You kids and your coffee,"
"Thanks," Haley smiled briefly, accepting the comforting beverage.
"So, Lucas tells me that Jimmy is back in town. How is your father? In fact, how are both of your parents?"
Having grown up with Lucas, meant having to grow up with his parents as well; who were extremely involved ones at that. There was a time when it offended her that he'd tell everything to his mother, specifically, because the courageous woman wasn't afraid to bring it right back up to the timid girl. She was embarrassed because the James family was not anything like the Roes. But, she learned that Keith and Karen brought up those often times, awkward but direct topics, for her benefit. They gave her a guardian figure to lean upon and to gain support from. After the fourth grade or so, Haley learned to trust them as much as she trusted Luke; never again were their conversations awkward.
"After the silence treatment the two were giving each other this whole week, I had quite the 'rude awakening' this morning. Hah! At least they were acknowledging each other, right? Is… is it terrible that sometimes I just… I just want him to break it off with my mom?"
Haley sighed into her mug, hoping to cool down the steaming drink, as well.
Karen looked at her with a tight-lipped smile, trying to hide the sadness that crept through her veins at the girl's question. She couldn't bear to think how it would be if her son ever felt that way about her and Keith.
"No," she softly answered.
"I wish… he'd take me with him, wherever he did decide to go. But then, I'd be leaving you guys and Tree Hill and only everything I've ever known…"
Karen smiled carefully, her eyes shining with sympathy. She didn't know what to say. She never really knew what to say.
"Can we just not talk about it anymore? Anyway, the semester finals are in a couple of weeks. It'll be a very welcome distraction," Haley said more to herself than to Luke's mom.
Karen nodded agreeably, feeling as though she'd accomplished nothing with this mini-conversation, and began to head over to the front door.
She was about to turn the lock open, five minutes to nine, when she heard a diminutive voice.
"Thank you, Karen,"
--
Jimmy James had been serious about the dinner date he'd promised his daughter upon his arrival. That was surprise #1. Well, the fact that he was hanging around long enough to even take her out to dinner was probably surprise #1. But, Haley learned to grow much more forgiving of her father over the years—with less expectancy, came less heartache.
So when he offered, she'd eagerly accepted his invitation, conflicting with her evening plans with Lucas. Lately, he had been pretty busy with his new interest, who was demanding of time and attention. She refused to go the week without a traditional movie veg-out and had planned accordingly so with him on Friday, after school. He was hesitant, of course, wanting to leave his schedule flexible for Brooke's convenience. Now, she was going to have to remove herself from his Saturday night slot. She doubted he would mind, that is, if Brooke wasn't too busy.
Haley picked up the phone, dialing Lucas' house while grimacing at the thought of the infamous Miss Davis. She didn't know what to think of her and whatever category of a relationship she was developing with her best friend. The girl was practically a walking, talking heartbreak waiting to happen. Oh, well. Lucas was a big boy.
"It scares me how telepathic we can be, best friend. I was just about to call you," Lucas answered in a falsetto tone.
"Uh huh… well, look, it's about tonight—"
"Yeah… about tonight, Hales… I'm not going to be able to do 'movie night'. I'm sorry,"
Her words caught in her throat for a moment, before she realized that she was the one who had to re-schedule, anyway. Yet, it irked her.
"Oh, no, it's okay. I was calling for a rain check, anyway,"
"Yay!" a female voice burst in the background; a raspy female voice.
"Who's that?" Haley asked, surprised by the sudden noise.
"Hi, Haley-Baley! It's Brooke,"
This time her voice rang clear through Haley's phone.
"Uh… Lucas? Am I on speakerphone?"
It was so out of character for him to display their conversation like that. She felt violated for some reason; as if her and Luke's get-together was just a big fat joke.
"Yeah," he admitted sheepishly.
"Well, can you take me off it?" she said coldly.
She heard what sounded like the hissing of a cat. Too bad the Roes didn't have any pets. Haley rolled her eyes at, most likely, Brooke's commentary animal sound.
"Sorry about that," Luke apologized quickly.
Brushing off his pathetic and meaningless apology, Haley replied,
"I'm not your mom, Luke. You don't need permission to blow me off for the millionth time to be with Brooke. So, please don't act like I'm pulling your teeth out when I ask if you want to hang out. I don't take it personally because I know you guys are pretty serious, or so it seems. All I'm asking is for you to treat me like your friend… best friend… or whatever,"
Haley hung up before giving him the chance to reply, but she could care less at that point. She dropped her phone carelessly onto her bed, letting out a frustrated sigh, as she ran both of her hands through her hair.
--
Sitting directly across from her dad, Haley fiddled with the array of utensils spread out before her. She'd give more than anything to be sharing a booth with her dad at Keith & Karen's rather than some fancy seafood restaurant in Wilmington. But, she went along with her dad's recommendation, wanting to avoid running into Lucas, at all costs.
"You okay, Haleybub?"
Jimmy observed his daughter's quiet demeanor and gave a go at breaking the unwavering silence.
"Mom would've liked this place," She half-heartedly threw out, dodging eye contact with her dad by opening up her menu.
"She was already out when I came home," he shrugged.
"I see,"
Silence.
Mr. James cleared his throat, again cracking the quietness with his whip of a tongue.
"How's life, kiddo?"
This time she eyed her father wearily.
"Great," she replied in such a low tone, her voice nearly croaked.
Thankfully, both father and daughter caught sight of the approaching server, his paces ever so slow. She waited curiously for her father's reaction when the waiter offered their wine selection, which he stiffly declined. He used to drink quite casually with her mother, especially when they attended their friends' soirees on the weekends. They were carefree and loving. Her eyes misted at the sudden wistful memory.
The clinking of their silverware against the plates was the only sounds now, aside from the casual conversations from the other tables wafting through the air. The entire environment was drab and dull: it was quite suffocating, in fact. While chewing the shrimp in her mouth, she turned to see what other kinds of people were seated, if anyone was as boring as she and her father were. Her eyes became transfixed with a vixen-like redhead, seated at the bar. She was staring straight at Haley. Despite her naturally sultry looks, she looked sharply dressed, clad in a fitted yet professional beige suit.
"Dad, do you see that woman? She won't stop staring at me," Haley nervously pointed out.
Without even looking up, Jimmy wiped his mouth with the napkin that had been in his lap and placed it onto his place. He didn't answer.
The way he had gripped the teal green cloth caused Haley to raise her eyebrow. She swung right back around to see that the redhead had disappeared from sight. She puffed out a small breath of air and followed her dad by putting her napkin onto her plate as well.
"Haley,"
"Mm hmm?"
"I feel… I feel that you've grown to become a very responsible and mature young lady,"
She felt a heaviness from his out-of-the-blue compliment and decided to remain quiet.
"And… well, there are a few things that I've been wanting to tell you,"
Her heart flip-flopped against her chest. Thinking back to her talk with Karen, it seemed that fate had been listening and dealt her a hand that suddenly she did not want. She waited for the "d" word.
"As you know, your mom and I… well, we've had a bit of a falling out…"
"Dad, I don't need the sugar-coated words. Just… say… it…" she struggled with her own demand.
"Your mother and I decided to get a divorce…"
She shut her eyes momentarily, anticipating the sting that was to come; there was none.
"… ten months ago,"
But, the next oncoming waves of pain, she had not prepared for.
--
Haley seated herself at a table at the tutoring center. She often went there to study and had even volunteered some time to tutor a freshman or two. But, today, she was meeting up with several girls from her U.S. History class for a project, Brooke Davis included.
"Ah, Tutorgirl!" Brooke nearly squealed.
Haley looked up, recognizing the rather annoying voice, but with a look of skepticism.
"Tutorgirl?"
"Oh, don't deny it. Luke informed me about your favorite pastime,"
Haley rolled her eyes and offered a plastic smile, showing a lack of amusement.
Ever since her little tiff with Lucas, they'd both been avoiding each other. She was fed up with him brushing her off, while he wanted to give her time to cool down before he approached her. He noticed a change in her mood and her enthusiasm; his mother had mentioned a few things as well. Not to mention, Brooke and him had officially become girlfriend and boyfriend. He was a tad bit occupied. Surprisingly, his new girlfriend felt terrible for what she felt was her fault and despite the two friends' current status, she kept her boldness alive when it came to Haley James.
The rest of the group entered, rescuing Haley from any further uncomfortable chit-chat with Brooke. Erica, president of the junior class, and Rachel, a cheerleader with a well-known reputation grabbed their seats, joining the two other girls.
As the girls worked on their poster board assignment, the school heating system was beginning to bother everyone in that tutoring room. Sweaters were peeled off, one-by-one. Haley was busy clipping some magazine photos as Brooke begrudgingly looked up dates in their history text. Erica was busy at the copier when Rachel subtly approached her from behind.
"Oh my God, did you see that Haley girl's arms?"
Erica swiveled around, irritated by the other girl's sudden close proximity and careless as to whatever she had observed in that tasteless and absurd manner of hers. But, she found her statement was eerily unexaggerated.
Sporting only a three-quarter sleeved t-shirt, the freshly scarred arms of Haley's moved back and forth as she nonchalantly slid a pair of scissors along a magazine article.
"Let's hope she doesn't 'slip' while using those scissors," scoffed the cheerleader, in a mocking tone, twisting the ends of her red strands around her fingers.
Haley noticed immediately. She felt the intent stares. She glanced up, noticing the sneering, judgmental gaze of Rachel's and the wide eyes of Erica's. They were both just as hurtful. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment, as she realized her mistake. She reached haphazardly for her zip-up sweater, throwing it back on as she swept her belongings into her bag, catching Brooke's attention.
"Oh, no; you are not leaving me with Crazy #1 and Crazy #2," Brooke whined.
"I have to go, Brooke… I um… I forgot about uh… shifts that I picked up over at the café,"
She stood, trying to front her ashamed emotions, as she scrapped together an excuse.
"Fine, then I'm done for the day, too,"
Brooke let out a small sigh, closing the heavy history book shut. She was never one to actually worry about a project, anyway. She slowly stacked up stray papers, not noticing that Haley James was long gone and her conniving cheer-mate walked unflinchingly towards her, her lips heavy with a topic of gossipy news.
Haley's mind buzzed and blurred with what had happened in the past five minutes. She had heard the exact words of that red-headed wench, Rachel. Rachel reminded her of another red-headed stranger that had been thrust into her life, so abruptly, her eyes blurring with tears at the memory.
"As you know, your mom and I… well, we've had a bit of a falling out…"
"Dad, I don't need the sugar-coated words. Just… say… it…" she struggled with her own demand.
"Your mother and I decided to get a divorce…"
She shut her eyes momentarily, anticipating the sting that was the come; there was none.
"… ten months ago,"
Mr. James didn't even budge as he said it. Ten months. Those heavy words lifted from his shoulders and he breathed a bit of fresh air.
"And during that time… well, I've actually met someone,"
He had to tell her everything. And with no emotional response from her, yet, he took advantage of her speechlessness.
"She's been dying to meet you and I've been dying to introduce her to you. I… told her to meet me here. Um… her name is Carolyn,"
Nothing really registered in Haley's brain, after the fact that her father just admitted his ten month-long divorce with her mother. Her thoughts drifted aimlessly as she wondered if Taylor or any of her other siblings knew and if they did, why she was so out of the loop. She wondered if there was to be a custody battle over her, but then she considered that she was going to be eighteen in only a couple of years. They didn't care. She knew her father would be far too infatuated with his precious Carolyn to have time to rebuild any relationship with one of his many children.
In her peripheral line of sight, she saw the very same clean-cut redhead, who had been sitting at the bar earlier, heading their way. Carolyn.
Standing in front of her locker, Haley pulled out extra textbooks she needed at home, cringing at the remembrance of that awful night. She rubbed at the self-inflicted wounds, over the top of her sleeves, ashamedly. She was utterly pathetic. Wasn't Rachel's reaction precisely what she yearned for? It was attention, wasn't it?
There was no precise explanation to why Haley had begun hurting herself, from the first several nights, when she slid out the glistening blade of the box-cutter she kept in her desk drawer. Watching the blood droplets beading in a straight line against her searing skin temporarily pulled away from the anger she felt inside. Some nights she prayed that her father would decide to make a surprise visit and walk in on her and see how he had broken her. She knew that would never happen—a visit. After that night, he flew back out to D.C. with Carolyn; that's where she lived. Her mom never came home that evening.
--
"Knock, knock,"
Brooke stood at the entrance of Peyton's bedroom, noticing her friend doodling furiously away as her grungy hits blared through her stereo.
Peyton turned her head over her shoulder, throwing her best friend a keen smile as her blonde curls flounced around, following her movements. She picked up her stereo remote, shutting of the music.
"Are you busy? I… I don't really want to bother you if…"
"Brooke, when have you ever cared if I was busy or not?" Peyton said with a teasing grin.
Swiveling her computer chair around, she motioned for her friend to sit on the bed.
The usually bouncy girl stood still, her hands jammed into the pocket of her stylish leather jacket.
"You know what… I… I'll just come back,"
Her words betrayed her as she stood planted in the same spot, stationary.
"What's wrong? Did something happen?" Peyton asked, finally noticing her friend's strange behavior.
"If I tell you something… this has to stay between you and me, okay?"
"Uh… okay… what is it? You're not in trouble are you?"
"Look… if someone we knew was… uh… hurting themselves… well, okay. What do you say to someone if… you don't know them that well but, they're…"
Brooke's words dispersed as did her thoughts.
"What? Hurting themselves? Who's hurting themselves?"
Peyton's eyes widened with a feeling of fear bubbling inside of her as she watched her best friend's eyes spilling over with tears. The only other time she had seen Brooke this emotional was when Peyton's mother had died a year into their friendship. She got up from her desk chair walking over to wrap her arms comfortingly around her best friend, still clueless as to why she was hurting.