Her mother's house was stunning. Located in the heart of Paris, it could be described as one of those buildings that made Muggles gasp in awe. Or at least, it would, if it wasn't invisible to them. Its white walls, decorated with a lot of various sculptures and reliefs always reminded her of her family's wealth, something that was a blessing and a curse at the same time.
Clarisse loved that house, there was no denying that fact. Most of her happy memories of childhood were connected to that place and its various attractions. As an old building, it held many mysteries, which proved to be a dream come true for a little girl, who had always been too curious for her own good.
She remembered all those times, when she had played hide and seek with her father. It used to be her favourite game, as it made her tingle with excitement every single time she had tried to find a hiding spot good enough to trick her old man. It made her so proud to know that he was having more and more troubles finding her in that massive house. Back then, that feeling had been everything she wanted.
Things had changed too much since then. Her father's face became nothing, but a blurry image in her memories, getting more and more vague with every passing day. She tried not to think about it, but she feared the day when it would become completely invisible. Her father was that one person, who was always there for her, protecting her from all the madness coming from her mother. Clarisse admired him and had always wanted to be just like him, to be an Auror and to make him even more proud of his little girl.
So many years later, she still wanted to make him proud, but she doubted he cared, wherever he was. Nobody knew whether he had even been alive, but she doubted that as well. Kylian Bouchard loved his family, he would have never simply left them behind and that meant he had to be dead.
Clarisse came to peace with that knowledge a long time ago, but seeing her house always reminded her of the possibility that he was still alive somewhere and it made her uneasy. She didn't need a constant reminder of that, but what other choice did she have? She couldn't avoid that place forever, especially with those nightmares haunting her every night. Besides, her mother would kill her if she refused to ever come home.
With a sigh, Clarisse crossed the street and climbed the stairs, leading to the house. When she grabbed the golden handle, all of the hesitation was gone from her face. She had already used all of the possible solutions to her problems and while one of them worked, she certainly wasn't going to make another mistake like that one.
What on Merlin's pants was she thinking? Considering the fact that she was about to walk into her mother's house and announce that she might have been a Seer or something equally ridiculous proved that she was a bit nuts. But to let Aedan Finley sleep in her bed? She hated that bloody git! What the hell was wrong with her sleep-deprived brain?!
What made things even worse, was the fact that it worked. That ridiculous, pointless and completely messed up idea worked. She woke up rested and satisfied and completely baffled with the scent of her pillow. Her pillow had never smelled like a man before and that concerned her for a moment, until she had remembered that stupid decision and her concern turned into shame and fury.
She had no idea how she was supposed to face him after what happened and she had absolute certainty that their next meeting was going to be terrible. But there was also a good consequence of her mistake. It had gotten her to go and see her mother, because she really didn't fancy the idea of letting Finley into her bed ever again.
The house was filled with silence, but it didn't startle her at all. Her mother hated noises, as she claimed that they disrupted her focus. It seemed weird to everyone, but Clarisse had actually gotten used to the silence pretty easily. Out of all the weird things coming from her mother's views, this one was almost bearable.
"Mother?" she asked, as soon as she had closed the door behind her and walked into the vast living room.
After what seemed like eternity, Eugenia Bouchard walked down the stairs with a completely surprised look on her face.
"Clarie? What are you doing here?"
"I need to talk to you," she answered, not wanting to make this visit longer than necessary, but her mother clearly didn't appreciate her efforts.
"Please, don't tell me it's about that book again."
Clarisse rolled her eyes and sighed. Well, it wasn't, but it didn't take a genius to figure out that this damned book had been in the centre of action. They still didn't know what it said, but Mr Leighton worked on it since the day before and, according to Jacques, he seemed completely mesmerised by it.
"No, mom. It's about something else," she said and sat down on the couch, biting the inside of her cheek.
Eugenia stopped at the bottom of the stairs and looked at her daughter carefully. Something in that gaze made Riss incredibly uneasy, so she shifted on the couch and scratched her head, while her mother smiled with satisfaction.
"You're ready to admit that you were wrong, aren't you?" she stated cheerfully and Clarisse supressed the urge to moan in despair.
Of course, she should have known that her mother would figure things out even before she had managed to start explaining. That was so like her, after all.
"I have no idea, that's the thing," Clarisse answered, not wanting to give her all the satisfaction. "All I know is that I'm having those nightmares and I can't seem to get rid of them."
"Splendid!" Her mother clapped her hands and smiled brilliantly, making Riss open her mouth with disbelief.
"Splendid?! I'm barely sleeping! How is that any good?!"
"You don't look so tired, Clarie," her mother noticed, forcing Clarisse to blush like a child.
Why would she look tired after spending the night in Finley's arms? Wasn't he everything she had ever wanted? The Auror wanted to grit her teeth at her own, ironic thoughts. Even in her head, those things sounded absolutely ridiculous and there was no way in hell that she was going to tell that to her mother.
"Yes, well, my body decided that it can't stand another insomniac night. I basically passed out in work and slept for a whole day," she lied and rolled her eyes at her mother's obvious doubt.
"You're lying."
"Am not! Why do you always have to assume that?"
"Because you are your father's daughter." Her mother's voice was quiet and filled with melancholy that instantly made Riss feel like trash.
She hated that bloody tone, because it was one of those things, which her mother used against her in every difficult, tense situation. Including this one now.
"Why does it even matter, mom?" she finally sighed and rubbed her temple. "I came to you for help, not for an interrogation. I have enough of that on daily basis."
Eugenia fell silent and after a minute, she joined her on the couch with a serious expression.
"What do those nightmares look like?" she asked quietly and Clarisse closed her eyes, letting her mind drift off to those familiar scenes.
"They are always the same. I walk through a thick mist, that refuses to dissipate for a while and then, it suddenly disappears, leaving me on a square, surrounded by those churches."
"What churches?"
"Crime scenes. Every crime has happened in front of a church," Riss explained and her mother frowned with worry.
"What happens next?"
"The door open and those shadowy figures walk out of the churches, as I drop down to my knees, suffocating. A wave of nausea hits me and I struggle for breath."
"And?"
"And then I wake up."
Her mother nodded and smiled cheerfully.
"Do you want some wine?"
Clarisse expected a lot of things, but this? Um, no.
"Are you serious?"
"Why, yes, of course! We have a long talk ahead of us and I hate talking without something to drink." Eugenia's voice was light and airy, making her daughter even more annoyed.
She didn't have time for this. Her work was waiting for her and she needed to get back to it soon. Certainly, her mother had to understand it.
"Mom, I just need you to tell me how to make them stop," the Auror said making the older woman scowl.
"It's not so simple, Claire. It takes a lot of practice to learn to control your dreams. Every Seer needs to understand that."
"Well, I'm not every Seer, mom," Riss sighed and shook her head. "You know that I need to sleep in order to do my job properly."
"You need a lot more than that, Clarie." Her mother's voice made shivers run down her spine; it was quiet and low, almost threateningly so.
"What do you mean?"
Her mother sighed and reached towards her neck, startling her at first, but when she took out the Merlinite from underneath her shirt, Clarisse frowned slightly.
"I wasn't sure if you decided to wear it. I thought it would take less time to make you come here," Eugenia said and Riss blinked a couple of times, trying to understand her words fully.
What was she trying to say, huh?
"You told me to wear it," she muttered and her mother smiled proudly.
"Of course I did. How else could I get you to acknowledge you heritage?"
"Wait, what?"
"That stone was supposed to make you discover your abilities. You've spent your entire life supressing them and I couldn't let you do that anymore. I knew that you weren't going to drop that horrible case, so I needed to make sure that you will be ready for what's coming your way."
Clarisse wanted to scream. Literally. All that talk about her mother being gentle and loving, unable to hurt her own daughter... Well, apparently it had all been a joke. A stupid, terrible joke.
"Please, don't tell me that I've spent the last week torturing myself, because you decidedto force me into something I clearly don't want," she gritted through her clenched teeth and her mother shot her an offended look.
"Clarie, don't you understand? You need it, whether you want it or not. There is no other way around it."
"Why don't you let me decide on that, mother?!" Riss stood up rapidly, unable to contain her anger. "Just once, for fuck's sake! You've always despised me for making my own choices, claiming that only the future you've planned out for me is worth anything. You've never supported me and you don't give a shit about my actual life! All you care about is to make me acknowledge something that has always been a curse to me! Do you hear me?! A curse, mother!"
She didn't care if the entire neighbourhood had heard her, even with all those spells cast upon the house. Suddenly, it didn't really matter that she had spent years trying to stifle all those emotions deep inside her heart, not letting them escape.
That one single thing made her blind with rage. It summed her life so perfectly that Clarisse really didn't have the strength to stay civil. She was done with feeling unloved, she was done with feeling guilty for not being the perfect daughter, but, most importantly, she was done acting like a stone wall unable to feel anything.
"No matter what I do, I'm never good enough," she whispered, sounding completely broken. "Not to you. The only way to change it, would be to forget about my own dreams and goals, to admit defeat. To everyone, I'm worth something, but to you? No. I'm just that daughter, who needs to change, who needs to do something, who needs..." she broke off and shook her head, when tears started to gather in the corner of her eyes.
She hadn't cried for years, since her father's disappearance. Tears were completely useless, after all. They didn't fix things, they didn't make the pain go away. They were a waste of time and Clarisse hated wasting her time.
"I don't need a Seer in my life. I never needed one. What I needed, was a mother. And guess what, I never got that. Just as you didn't get a daughter, who wants to listen to all that crap," the Auror said after a short while and looked at her mother, who sat on the couch completely still and shocked. "You can say that I'm blind, that I'm making a mistake, but you should really look at yourself in the mirror and think about your own actions. Because tricking your daughter into wearing a necklace that made her life a living hell doesn't qualify as a good deed."
Silence enveloped the room once more and Clarisse realised how uncomfortable it must have been for all the visitors. She could hear her own raging heartbeat, her mother's shaky breath and that annoying ticking of a clock, hanging on one of the walls.
"Clarie... I was doing everything for your own good," her mother whispered after what seemed like an eternity. "There are things that you simply cannot ignore, you have to learn to control them, before they start to control you."
"The only thing that's controlling me is you," she answered and unclenched her fists, letting the blood rush to her palms, making them hurt all over. "If I take that damned necklace off, will the nightmares end?"
"Yes, but..."
"Then I don't want it," she interrupted and almost ripped the Merlinite off her neck. "Take it and give it to someone, who actually appreciates your meddling."
With that, she spun around and left the house without the intention of ever going back.