Chapter Ten

"What's up with him?" Tony asked as he plopped down in the seat Bruce had been occupying just before he'd walked into the kitchen.

Carter shrugged, eyes still on her fiancé's back. Bruce looked a bit like he was fleeing a crime scene. Her brows contracted in concern. "I dunno. Said he wasn't feeling good and that he was gonna take a nap." She paused for a moment and reached over to the partially empty tea mug Bruce had left. "I found him down in the lab. He'd... he'd had a nightmare of some sort."

"What about?" Tony propped himself up on one elbow, turning his head so that he could see his friend better.

"He didn't say." Carter pressed her lips together. Tony could picture the gears in her head turning.

After a quick awkward silence, Tony whipped out a sheet of paper, unfolded it to reveal Steve's drawing, and pushed it in front of Carter. Her eyes grew wide as she looked at an almost exact replica of Logan.

"Someone here has artistic talent?" she asked incredulously.

Tony nodded. "Steve. And he drew that of Logan - in 1944. See the war uniform and the headset? Apparently, Logan ran the radio. Only his name wasn't Logan; it was James Howlett."

"So..." Carter picked up the piece of paper to get a closer look. "Logan is James? And James served in World War Two?" She waved her arms in the air exasperatedly. "How many icebergs did people get stuck in, anyways? Next thing you know, Hitler's gonna pop up and be all, 'Nien, I vas just sleeping'."

"That's the thing," Tony explained. "Well, not the Hitler thing, but you do have an excellent point there. That actually could happen. We should really have someone be on the lookout... Anyways, I looked up 'James Howlett' in SHIELD's database system. And no, I am not actually allowed to do that. From what I found, there's been a 'James Howlett' in every war from Civil to Vietnam. And it seems like the same James Howlett."

Carter gave him an annoyed look. "Are you telling me we have another temperamental god on out hands?"

"A god he is not," Tony replied, thinking of the gruff, wild man who was now living under their roof. "But immortal he may be."

"You used proper English in that sentence. You've been hanging around Thor and Steve too much."

Tony sighed at his own proper grammar. "I know. But look, we're getting off topic again. I think we need to ask someone about Logan/James."

Carter thought about it for a minute. "You're right, but who? We can't go to Fury," she pointed out. "He would never talk. And neither would Coulson, if Coulson had that sort of information. We probably should just go behind Logan's back; if we ask him and he doesn't react well, we become human shiskabobs."

"I already thought of that - minus the shiskabob thing, which, again, is an excellent point." Smirking at his own genius, Tony continued, "I found out who our new friend worked for before this. And I've set up a meeting with him!"

Tony clapped Carter on the back. "My friend, you and me are going to Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters!"

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE

Logan had had it with this Thor guy.

First, the Poptart thing. Thor had completely wiped Walmart out of Poptarts, and then the idiot had the nerve to complain that the store was 'insufficiently stocked' and the he was 'in need of more of these delicacies'. Three hundred boxes (plus the ones that were at home in the fridge) was more than enough. And, of course, it turned out that Thor was also expecting about nine thousand boxes of Girl Scout cookies.

While Logan had a thing for Samoas, enough was enough. How many carbs did one guy need? The fridge was packed; at this point, there would be no room for Logan's beer. And he had a problem with that.

Logan was drawn out of his self-pity-angst party by moaning coming from the other room.

That sent him back to the party: After the Poptart thing, Thor had dragged Logan to SHIELD's base so the god could visit his girlfriend at work. Their visit had started nearly half an hour ago, and judging by the sounds coming from the room, was not likely to end soon.

Logan slumped back against the hallway bench and let out a growl. If he'd thought it would work, he would have put a gun to his and pulled the trigger by now. Anything to make this end.

With a decisive snort, he propelled himself to his feet and began to stalk down one of the many metal-walled SHIELD hallways.

There was a good chance he'd find his way out to the parking lot eventually.

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE

Ethan, Pepper thought, jotting it down. Ethan Stark. That would be a good name...

"Oh, hey, Peps!"

Pepper looked over her shoulder to see Tony coming up, a huge grin on his face. He crossed the office floor in three long steps and leaned down to plant a quick kiss on her lips. "Whatcha doin'?"

Pepper showed him her notepad. "I know I should be working, but I started writing down some baby names and got a bit carried away," she admitted with a sheepish smile.

"Me too! Well, that's not exactly what I was doing, but I've got a list!" Tony reached into his suit pocket and produced a crumpled up sheet of paper. "See? I actually do! Want me to read you some?"

Pepper beamed at her husband (who was finally being responsible) and nodded.

"Alright." Tony cleared his throat. "Pepper 2.0, Tony 2.0 - "

"That will make our child sound like a robot." Pepper face-palmed and felt her high hopes drop instantaneously. She prayed that there was actually useable material on that list. "We are not going to name our child anything that so blatantly has to do with technology and mechanics. I'm sorry."

Tony face fell, but he rebounded quickly. Focusing on the list, he said, "So, I should take 'Machine Gun', 'Missile', War Machine Jr.', 'Screwy', 'Iron Baby', 'Ironita', 'Crankshaft', 'Screwdriver', and 'Toyota' off the list then? What about 'Nut'? I was thinking of that as more a food related name, because I also have 'Pecan' and 'Apple' written down. Speaking of Apple, should I take 'PC' off here, too?"

"Yes," Pepper replied tightly, nerves starting to fry. "Yes to all of that."

Tony picked up a pen and scratched off the nixed names. He scratched his beard thingv (which Pepper needed to ask him to shave) thoughtfully, like a Disney villain who was plotting something. "OK. So, there are a couple I'm not really sure about, but I thought I should just throw out there anyway. 'Stan Lee', 'Jorge', 'Spot', 'Rex', 'Zeus', 'Athena', Poseidon', 'Hades' - "

"We cannot name our child after the god of hell!" Pepper exclaimed, looking at her husband with wide, horrified eyes.

"OK, OK," Tony said quickly as he held his hands up in surrender. "No gods of death. In that case, I should probably take 'Pearl Harbor' and 'Adolf' off here. Heh." Before Pepper could start screeching at him again, he continued.

"Now, I'm actually excited about these next few. 'Nick Fury Jr.' and 'Jesus' are probably my favorites, but I'd be willing to go for 'Thor Jr.' or 'Lil' Steve' or even 'Coulson' if that's what it comes down, too. Oh, and this is perfect: 'Your Mom'. No? How about 'Your Face'?" You know, you don't have to glare at me like that, Pepper. Oh, hey! Brilliant idea - 'Pony'! Like, 'Pepper' and 'Tony' combined!"

"No."

"Yeah, you're right that's stupid. It'd be like a rip-off of 'Ponyboy', and we cannot have S.E. Hinton sue us over our child's name." Tony tapped his chin a couple of time. "Oh! Oh my God, yes! Are you ready for this, Peps?"

Pepper pursed her lips. "Tony, you're getting on my last - "

"I change my name to 'Salt' and then we name the baby 'Paprika'! And then we'll be 'Salt', 'Pepper', and 'Paprika'! Get it?"

Closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose, Pepper sung her arm around and pointed at the door. "Get out of my office, Tony. Now. Before I kill you."

"Oh! What about 'Naked'? Then he can be 'Naked Stark', like stark naked, only - "

"Now."