Wanda's POV

I wake up from the shouting outside my room, followed by something that hits the walls.

"You've done enough, don't you understand that?" I hear Jared shout again. I wonder what he is doing outside my bedroom, and how long he has been there. I've been very clear when I've told everyone to leave me alone, trying to remain as polite as I can. But it's like I don't care anymore.

So the next voice that raises makes my heart pound hard against my chest. "Let me through, Jared!"

"You didn't even give a shit about what you did to her!" Jared says. It feels like I'm going to explode, my head aching the harder my heart beats. I'm shaking as I try to stand up, realizing that I haven't really done anything but lying in bed since Ian hung up the phone. Since Ian supposedly died.

Except he didn't.

"Ian..." I try to shout it out over the noises, but all that comes out is a hoarse cry, barely above a whisper. I walk towards the door, trying to keep myself from falling back down as my vision dims.

Just before I reach the handle on the door, someone else pulls the handle and the doors shoots open, and there he is, more alive than I've seen him in months, standing in front of me. And my heart slowly goes back to normal speed. My shaking stops. I stop.

"Wanderer." He says. I can't do anything but stare at him, and I wonder what he thinks right now. I can see it in his eyes; worry, confusion, hurt, and guilt. I've seen it all before.

Jared is standing behind him, staring at me as well. He hasn't seen me in days. The only person I've let inside my room is Melanie. No one else got to see me like this. After a while, Jared lays one hand on Ian's shoulder, trying to lead him out."Ian-"

"Wanderer, I am so very sorry," Ian says, his voice breaking and his eyes suddenly filled with tears that he tries to blink back. "I'm so sorry," he says again and pulls away from Jared, closer to me and wraps his arms around my stiff body. I don't put my arms around him. I don't cry. He was dead. I cried over his death for so long, and now I don't even know what to think.

I don't know how long we stand like this. He doesn't say anything, the only sound that comes from him is when he sniffs, or when he breathes out so heavy that I can even hear that he is shaking. Then, abruptly, he pulls back and I can feel his eyes on me. But I stare right at his chest.

"Please, Wanda, say something," he says. When I don't answer, he tilts my chin up so we make eye contact for a split second before I turn away from him and sits back down on the bed.

He stands there for a moment, then he sits down next to me, folds his hands and stares straight ahead.

"Look, I know I've been selfish and... out of my mind, I know. But..." He stops for a second, lays his head in his hands and breaths in and out before he turns his head and looks at me. I look at him as well, and it hurts me to see him cry. After months where he has struggled with all the memories, where he cried himself to sleep not knowing that I could hear him, when he woke up screaming, couldn't eat, couldn't think clearly, couldn't do anything but trying to keep himself from falling completely apart. I was there the whole time, I should be used to see him like this by now.

He looks down, still looking for the right words to say. "I thought that you might be better off without me," he says quietly. "And that was a selfish thought. Because the truth is that I thought I was better off without myself. I just wanted it to be over, Wanderer."

He looks at me again, doesn't say anything for a while. "I understand if you don't want to talk to me. But know this," he says and leans a little forward. "You're the one that kept me going all along, okay? And I love you so very much, and I'm so terribly sorry for hurting you like this."

He stands up then, and walks quietly towards the door.

"Are you leaving me again?" I say, forcing my voice to be steady, and he stops.

"I'll be back," he says and then he is out the door.

Ian's POV

"Ian," Jared says as soon as I'm outside again. "The soul you brought back... I don't want you to..."

"What?" I say, still walking.

"He's awake. And Reader says he knows him from the past, I don't know..."

"So it's true?" I ask, though I don't really care anymore.

"He's not a seeker, if that's what you mean. At least that's what Reader says, but it takes a lot more than that to trust him. But please don't look for him."

"I'm not gonna look for him, I'm staying with Wanda."

He walks next to me for a while, not saying anything. "Is she okay?"

I stop abruptly. "No. She hates me."

"She doesn't hate-"

"She does, and it's so clear. I hurt her, Jared, I really hurt her," I say. I feel so terrible, and when I saw her there in our room, she looked so sick. She was so pale, her eyes were swollen and all I could think was that it was my fault.

"Yeah, you did," Jared says and crosses his arms. He's so mad at me. The first thing he did when he saw me was yelling at me, but I didn't really have time for him. Nor do I have time for him right now. I need to stay with Wanda.

"How long is it since she last ate, slept, did anything?" I ask and start walking again.

"Almost a week," Jared mutters behind me and I turn around again.

"You haven't-?"

"She refused."

They might all be angry with me, but right now I am angry. She could've died. A couple more days and she would've died.

I walk straight towards the kitchen, avoiding the people that tries to stop me as I walk past them.

"Ian?" Someone says, and I don't even look at him. I'm not leaving Wanda. I'm staying with her. I'm going to make it all better.

When I walk into the dining hall, everything turns quiet, and the few people in there have stopped eating and is now staring at me.

"I'm just gonna..." I mumble and take two plates of pancakes, a couple of cups and a mug of water, and walk away from the kitchen again as fast as I can. I can't stand all these eyes staring, like I'm a ghost. Being a ghost would've made the same difference anyway.

When I get back to our room, Wanda is still sitting on the bedside. She hasn't moved an inch.

"I brought us some food," I say and walk over to her, carefully placing the plate on her lap. "Jared said that..." I stop myself. Of course she knows herself. She has been in here for almost a week now, not eating, not talking. I've only seen her like this once, and I hated Jeb for letting her see what was going on at Doc's, for making her feel this way. "Please eat," I finally say. "I'm going to stay here with you now, okay? And I'm going to fix this. I'll fix you."

"Promise you'll stay," she says.

Carefully, I lay my hand over hers, squeezing it softly. "I promise."