Chapter Eleven:
Patrick got back into the car with the bags of groceries and was glad to see Robin still asleep in the back seat. He knew she needed to eat liquids for a while and he was afraid of leaving her at home alone. He figured a quick run into the store would be okay.
"Can you please take me home now?" She asked from the back seat.
"Yep, but you've been asleep, so I figured it was okay to stop," he said as he pulled out onto the street and made his way to her place.
Robin was out again and he smiled as he looked in the rearview mirror.
XXXX
A little while later, Patrick sat in her family room while Robin took a nap. He had so many questions for her, and so many issues on his mind; he didn't know what to do first.
He was also worried about her. She should be in the hospital. She shouldn't take any chances with her health.
He looked up as she came out of her bedroom and walked slowly to the comfy chair in the room.
"I thought you were sleeping," he smiled.
"I can't. I didn't think you would still be here."
"Does it bother you that I'm here?"
She looked at him and her tears came, but she brushed them away.
"No. I'm glad you're here, but I feel weird saying that. I really will be okay if you want to leave."
"Why do you feel weird?"
She tucked her hair behind her ear and winced at the bruising on her face.
"I've always been a self sufficient person. I don't need anyone to take care of me."
"And now?"
"I don't want to need anyone. I need to be able to get through this on my own."
Patrick smiled and nodded.
"What happened in your past to make you that way?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, you are self sufficient, that's obvious, but you seem afraid to let me help you. You seem to act like it would be a sign of weakness and it's not."
Robin didn't like how accurate he was in his assessment of her.
"I'm not afraid to let you help me."
"Okay, so what's bothering you?"
"I really don't like violence. I guess this shook me up more than I wanted to admit. I kept feeling his hands on my throat and the gun in my side," she looked at him and shrugged. "I really hate guns."
"It sounds like you have experience with guns? Your friend Sonny seems to be a reason why."
Robin smiled.
"Not a fan of Sonny?"
"At least he had a small personality. Jason is like a brick wall."
She raised her eyebrows as she looked at him.
"You met Jason? Did you have a chance to examine him?"
"No. He's an asshole and to be honest, you don't strike me as someone who would have anything in common with him."
Robin smiled.
"You might not know me as well as you think."
He leaned forward and flashed her his dimples.
"Now I'm intrigued."
"I'm sure you are, but I think it's been enough talk about my life."
"I don't think so. I think you're an enigma and I want to know more."
"An enigma? I like that. There is something to be said for a girl keeping a few mysteries to herself."
"True," he stood up and went into the kitchen, coming back with some jello. "Now you need to eat."
She looked at the jello and then at him.
"I don't need a nurse. I can get food if I'm hungry."
He put it down and sighed.
"Then why am I here?"
"I told you that you could leave. I'll be okay alone."
"I know. You're self sufficient and wonderfully capable. You're also kind of irritating."
She picked up the jello.
"It's part of my charm."
He chuckled and sat down, answering his phone when it rang. Robin swallowed with some difficulty, but was happy to see her voice and breathing seemed to be strong.
She took her meds and sat back, closing her eyes for a minute. So much of what he asked, what he said, struck a nerve.
She could tell him more. She could open up and let him in. She could try.
But she was scared.
"Well, it looks like an apartment might have opened up," he said and startled her.
"Sorry, I didn't realize you were sleeping," he said softly.
"I wasn't, just thinking. That's great about the apartment."
"Thinking about what?"
She smiled.
"It's nothing."
"Why did you call me earlier?"
She wiped her face and looked at her hands.
"I don't know."
"I don't believe you," he smiled.
"I have a hard time with violence. I've always hated guns and gunfire. My parents left when I was little and I guess I always tried to be good so they would come back. I overcompensated and I followed the rules. I tried to be careful and smart. I didn't want to cause any trouble."
"Did your parents ever come back?"
"Kind of. I grew up thinking they were both dead, but that wasn't true. They just had jobs that kept them away from me. My Uncle Mac raised me and he has been the best parent."
"What kind of jobs did they have that made you think they were dead?"
"They are spies," she said and smiled at his shocked look. "I'm not that exciting, so no worries."
"Wow. Spies?"
"Yeah, but when you're a little kid and you need your parents, that doesn't mean a whole lot. I went through so much and they weren't there. Mac was there, and so was Sonny."
"Sonny. The guy who loves guns."
"Right. He was a surrogate father or brother really, to Stone."
"Stone? What is a Stone?"
Robin looked at him.
"He was my boyfriend who died of AIDS."
Patrick sighed.
"I'm sorry."
She stood up and hugged her sweater around her.
"I just hate being out of control. I couldn't control what happened to Stone and I can't control the life Sonny chose and by default, the one Jason chose, too. What I can do is live my life with integrity and make sure I leave the world a better place than before I was here. I take my meds and work hard and stay safe."
"That sounds great, but it's not realistic."
"I just want to feel safe, you know?" she turned and looked at him and he walked over to her. "I guess that's why I called you. I just wanted to feel safe. Is there anything wrong with that?" she started to cry.
He didn't think. He simply pulled her into his arms and held her.
"No, there is nothing wrong with wanting to feel safe. I'm honored that I seem to be someone who can do that for you."
She rested her head against his chest and let herself be held, if just for a minute, before her need to protect her heart took over.
Patrick relished feeling her in his arms and he rested his chin on her head as she tightened her arms around him. He heard her sniff and step back.
"Thanks, but I really think it's time for you to go. I need to go to sleep and then try to figure out how to get Jason to agree to see you."
He nodded.
"Okay. I talked to his wife and she agreed to get him in to see me tomorrow so I can run tests."
"Seriously? You'll see him?" she smiled and he had to admit it was beautiful.
"I will, but I won't agree to like him," he smiled and grabbed his keys. "You'll call if you need anything?"
She walked him to the door and nodded.
"I promise. I'll see you tomorrow, okay? I'll meet you at GH for the appointment."
"Okay," he stopped and looked at her. "And Robin, you deserve to feel safe, always. I'm really sorry this happened to you."
She nodded and smiled again.
"Thank you for saving me."
He beamed and left, wanting more than anything to hold her again.