Hey everyone! Thanks so much for people still following and commenting on this story! I told you I haven't given up on it. What I'm going to do is that every saturday I will post a new chapter for everyone to read! It will be a long one too, in thanks of having people wait so long to read what's going on. I truly hope you like this next chapter. Please leave me feedback and comments. I try and take into consideration everything that you all say! Thank you! Enjoy!

I had come to the very strong conclusion that try as I may, I was falling quite hard for Edward Cullen. It's not like that type of falling where you're aimlessly gliding through a dark abyss. But, like the falling where you're okay because you know you're going to a better place. It was as if I was falling from the heavens only to be brought back to earth. I couldn't stop thinking about him, and at first I believed myself to be totally mad. At night I would dream about his eyes, the same eyes that dug through my flesh as he stared at me that night. I would remember snippets of his hair as it brushed against the most sensitive parts of my skin. His kisses were the most intoxicating because it felt as if he was a part of me. It was as if I had lost my breath for so long and had finally learned to breathe the right way. It was a spark, like a bolt of lightning being shot through my veins every time we are together. He was a wild forest fire beside me waiting to alight me in flames, but, it's okay because I welcomed getting burned.

I don't quite know how this all happened. I am a serious girl who tries to think rationale about every little detail. However, Edward quiets my endless thoughts and gives me something I thought I would never quite have, belonging. He makes me feel special and no one has ever made me feel like I was of importance. Course, my family loved me, then again they have to because I'm their daughter. Still, I have always felt that that's the key point in my family's relationship to me: they HAD to love me. Edward didn't have to do anything. Choice, that is the key, he chose to be with me. It's something beautiful about the human being able to choose their own destiny. Even though he and I being together seemed to hurt two of the most important people in our lives a part of it felt nice. As selfish as I sound a part of me knew I should stop seeing Edward Cullen, but, I knew deep down in my gut that I never would.

It's been two days sense our encounter. I haven't seen him and I don't know exactly how I feel about the situation. A part of me knows it'll be good for me. I needed a couple days to cool off and think rationally about the situation. But the other side of me smacks that side in the face, saying "you know you liked him around. He made you feel things, such wonderful things." I sit in front of the mirror brushing my hair. I have just washed it and it falls in a heap of waves down my back. I am trying to think of an escape plan, one, that I can get out of this house unnoticed so that I could see him. The cullens would be a problem getting passed however, but, it was a risk I was willing to take. Wow, me, taking risks! I don't know if it's the carnal instincts of me going wolf, or if it's just because I'm a stupid love sick teenager… love… wow, big word. I don't know if I should really be saying that…

I hear a knock on my door and it throws me out of the 15th stroke that I have just done to my hair. I turn towards the door awaiting the next movement. I know I should say enter, or come in, however I'm scared of confronting Jake. It's also been two days sense he's talked to me. For the last couple of days he's stayed at home treating me like I was nonexistent. It truly hurts my feelings because we have always been so close. I think that's another reason why I'm so scared of my feelings for Edward. Are they really that strong that it would allow me to betray the one person I care the most about? My own flesh and blood and my own pack member?

"Leah, can I come in?" It's his voice before I hear my own. I nod my head but I soon realize he cannot either see nor hear a nod. I put my brush down feeling rather foolish as I say,

"yes. Come on in Jake." Jacob walks into my bedroom door and his look has slightly shifted. For the most part he can actually stare at me in the eyes. At first he wouldn't even look at me as if I were a clump of dirt on the ground and he wanted to kick me under a sofa. Jacob walks close and sits down next to me. He is quiet for a moment and for a second I believe he will not say anything. After a while he looks up at me and I cannot help but smile, rather softly, in his direction. He does the same and wraps me into an embrace. I sigh in relief as I'm in his arms. I wrap my rather small arms across his rather large waist and I feel the upmost comfort knowing that I got my best friend back. After we're done with our embrace we both lean back.

"I'm sorry I went off so much on you. I kind of went psycho there." I push some of my hair behind my ear.

"It was kind of like night of the living dead. All the scary fairytale creatures battling each other." We both laugh in unison. I pat his thigh, "no, but in all seriousness. I understand why you're so upset. I'm sorry I don't know what came over me…" He shakes his head and sighs,

"Edward is good at what he does. He preys on women making them fall in love with him, making them feel as if they need him. He's a monster Leah. He's a blood-sucking demon that has been around for years. I would think by now he's mastered woman and he's damn good at what he does."

"But, how do you know all this about him. It's not fair to prejudge someone without knowing them." I defend.

"Didn't you see what he did to Bella?" I want to say Bella is weak, but, I have just won back Jacob's trust I don't think I can bare another argument with him over Bella. In fact, he loves talking about Bella so why not change the subject to her?

"How is she?" I really don't care to know the answer but I can see the shift in mood on Jacob. His eyes become softer with her being brought up. I do not see this affect that she has on him. What made Bella Swan so damn special? It was as if she had a spell over him, maybe she was a witch? If vampires and werewolves existed why not add a freakin pimpled nosed, broom flying, witch to the picture. I mean I'm pretty sure she did like black cats…

"She's better now. She's pretty shaken up you know. I think she's more hurt than anything." I nod my head.

"I can understand that." Jacob raises an eyebrow,

"can you really?" I nod.

"yes, Jake really. I would never be that type of girl that would mack on someone's boyfriend. Plus, they were broken up." Jacob shrugs,

"Still she had very strong feelings for him."

"Sure didn't seem that strong when she was with you in the movie theater." Jacob throws me an annoyed look. I bite my lower lip and roll my eyes.

"Okay, what are you suggesting? You want me to throw myself at her and beg for forgiveness?" Jacob gives me a devious smile. I do not like it at all one bit.

"Well, I had thought of something different, but, sense you've mentioned it."

I cannot believe that I am outside the one house that I thought I would never be. I stand outside with my arms crossed around my chest. Jacob is standing next to me with a grey hoodie on and blue jeans. He lifts up his arm ready to knock on the door. Before he can knock Charlie, the man with the thick mustache opens the door.

"Oh, Jake, It's good to see you again." He pats Jacob on the shoulder. He turns towards me and smiles,

"and you as well." I nod my head. I hope he doesn't notice the intense aggravation that I am showing.

"You too Mr. Swan is Bella in her room?" Charlie looks up towards her bedroom window, the sun hits his eyes, and he slowly looks back down at us. He has that worried father look, and it merely breaks my heart. I realized that by hurting Bella I not only hurt her but all the people that were connected to her. She was a link in a chain of many other people. Yanking that chain would expose all the rest of those pieces in the process. My arms slowly come uncross from my stomach and fall towards my side.

"Yes, she's in her room. Hasn't left in two days. Won't tell me why though. I don't know what she'd do without you Jake. Especially sense you know who left." Jacob smiles,

"You know I'll always be here for Bella." Charlie nods.

"I know, well, in that case I'm off to work. I'll see you both later." He leaves the house and both Jacob and I walk inside the quaint little home. We walk up the stairs and I swear it feels like its mountains. My heart thumps rapidly inside my chest. As we get to the top of the stairs I take Jacob's hand and grasp it quite tightly.

"Jake, I don't know if I can do this." Sure, I seem more confident now because of my change, but the same old me is still burrowed deep inside of me. I still wanted to be liked by Bella, I never wanted to truly hurt anyone.

"We're here now you have to. Plus, the least you owe her is an apology." Jacob wiggles his hand free from mine, and I know that if I don't do this I would lose him as well. I sigh as I place my hands on the wall breathing. I turn around and notice that Jacob has already walked into Bella's bedroom. I take another sigh as I walk towards her room. I look inside and see her sitting in a chair peering outside her open window. It has a weird odor inside her room and I do not dare and think it's musk. Jacob is kneeling beside her and holding her hand so delicately.

"Bella, someone is here to see you and apologize." She doesn't say anything. If it wasn't for her russet hair peeking from above the brown wooden chair I would think Jacob is talking to thin air. He looks at me and I take it as my cue to step forward into my own demise. I walk over towards her and stand in front of her. I can fully take her in now as the sun slowly hits her tired face. She is hunched over in the chair with a brown hoodie on that is way too big for her slender body. Her hair flops around her slender shoulders and falls slightly towards her back. Her pale face looks grey and dull and slight circles have assembled under her eyes. Her brown eyes meet mine and I swear I feel something I have never felt before. She looks at me and it almost reads how could you? I feel awful with myself and I take pity on her. I want to touch her hand or shoulder but I know that wouldn't be appropriate.

"Bella…"I begin to say whole-heartedly, I truly do seek her forgiveness. "I'm so sorry. You were so sweet to me. Welcomed me here when I knew no one. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you." My eyes begin to water and I hate myself when a tear trickles down my cheek towards my chin. I feel like such a horrible person and I cannot take this blame on me any longer. Bella nods her head and I can see her eyes swell up with tears as well.

"It's not your fault. I just couldn't believe Edward would…" She trails off and Jacob has lifted her up, as gently has Edward had done me, and placed her sobbing body on his lap. She curls around him like a crying child as he rubs her head. Jacob looks up at me and I nod my head. I hated being this person that caused so much pain and ruin in someone else life. That had never been me. I wanted to be the girl who always smiled, the one who could brighten up someone's day, even if I couldn't brighten my own. Were my feelings for Edward altering me in the process?

This realization is way too much I bolt out of Bella's room and fly out of the house. My anger and sadness is boiling inside of me like a volcano and it's ready to erupt. I fall forwards and I know its happening before I can even stop it. I begin to shed my skin and my cries piece the sun above me. I feel the immense pain of the change and then I can see perfectly. I begin running in my wolf form towards the forest. I can hear Jacob calling me back, inside my mind, but I choose to not listen. I don't want to be around them anymore. I don't want to see what I had done to them. I had slowly become more accustomed to my powers and being in my wolf form. It gave me a sense of knowing and allows me to be free of limitations for awhile. I run so fast that the wind slams itself against my face. I run towards a meadow with flowers gliding through the wind. I stop as I see Edward in the clearing by the meadow. He is deliberately in front of me and I know he's there because he means to stop me. I don't want to stop however, he would only remind me of that wrong that I did. I want to run past him to show him my strength but I cannot bring myself to do so. I slow down and stand before him. A part of me is embarrassed, would he still like me knowing what I truly am, seeing the evidence right in front of his face? He reaches out and glides his hand alongside the fur on my face.

"Take control," he murmurs. I obey, in fact, in this form I could hurt someone and that is the last thing that I wanted to do. I nod my head slowly and I begin the pain of transforming back. Edward turns around and I am thankful he did. I didn't want him to see me this way going through this type of pain. I didn't want him to think less of me. I also knew that once the transformation was complete I'd be naked…

I come back to reality on the forest floor with the birds chirping loudly. I hear their song but I can no longer understand it. I wrap one hand around my bare chest and the other around my womanhood. I flush a pale pink.

"Um, do you mind finding me something to wear?" I can hear a slight chuckle under Edward's breath as he begins undressing his jacket and dress shirt.

"You know if you wanted to plan an outing where it required you naked you simply should have asked."

"Just, don't turn around." I say still turning a beat red. He hands me his dress shirt, his eyes closed as he turns around. We are in the shade but I can still see the beautiful definition of his naked chest, arms, and abdomen. His body so chiseled and pale like a sculpture formed by the most eloquent hands.

"You're starring at me," there is some amusement in his tone. I become annoyed, frustrated, but slightly more embarrassed of the two.

"You said you're eyes were closed!" I grab the dress shirt and wrap it on my body quite swiftly. He smiles, eyes still sown shut,

"they are but your heartbeat gives your secret away." I begin buttoning up the dress shirt.

"Perhaps I should stop breathing then." I button the last button and notice that the dress shirt only comes to the middle of my thigh. This is so highly inappropriate. If anyone saw me… worse…if Jacob saw me. "You can open your eyes now." Edward does as he is told and as his eyes stare upon me I feel my breath catch again. The universe pulls us together, we're meant, as if we're carved in a tree entailing our destinies.

"You were upset." He says softly and it makes me want to run towards him so he could comfort me, just as Jacob is comforting Bella. I simply nod.

"There's been a lot of blame placed on me lately. It makes me feel like some type of—"

"Monster?" Edward states before I can. I nod my head. "But you know you aren't a monster." I shrug,

"I don't know who I am anymore. I mean did you just fully see me? I don't know how you could still look at me the same." Edward laughs but it's more hoarse and filled with pain. He shakes his head,

"As if I'm any better?"

"You're beautiful," I blurt out. I feel dumb for saying it but it had to happen. I cannot seem to hold my tongue when I'm around him.

"I am the farthest from that." He comes closer to me and takes my hand. His touch feels so nice. I lean in closer to him and he stops me from doing anything further. "There's something I want to show you." I nod my head as he walks me deeper into the meadow where the shade no longer hides us. He stops as he gets towards the sun and I look at him oddly.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"You showed me yourself fully. Now it's my turn," I look at him incongruously and before I can stop him he walks into the sunshine. At first I thought he would fall to a pile of ashes on the ground. However, it is the exact opposite he glitters and lights up like the purest diamond. His body glistens like dozens of crystals and it makes him look even more stunning, even more divine. I walk into the sunlight with him and it seeps into my skin as well. I cup the side of his face and I know he doesn't have the strength to back away from me. He's so cold against my skin like a cube of ice melting in the sunlight. I look at his face and take in every single detail about him. I want to remember every curve of his lip, every speck of golden inside his eyes.

"You're perfect," I say softly.

"For only someone with the purest of hearts could see through my darkness and still find me perfect when I am anything but." I press my nose close to his and our lips are barely touching. We can breathe in each other's air.

"We're both tainted Edward. But together perhaps we can be made pure." He is the one this time that bunches into me gliding me closer to him. His hands around my waist. He leans in and we share each other's breath. He is like the poem I never knew how to write and this moment now is the story I've only dreamed of living. It's better than any of the books I've read because it's so real. Time before him I had read books as one would breathe air to fill up and live, now, he was the lines inside the pages filling me up with welcomed bliss. I love that he appreciates me for the monster than I am and I him. I didn't care what he was and he didn't care about my tainted past. Imagine meeting someone who understood even the dustiest corners of your mixed-up soul. That is what Edward Cullen did for me. I couldn't be without him now and dare I say I loved him. Not simply for his beautiful appearance but for the struggling creature in search of his own identity. For I too am in search of the person that I am meant to be. Maybe all this time our souls were in search for each other? He glides his icy cold hands up my thigh to my lower back and I swear I will most likely melt into him.

"You look so much better in my shirt," he murmurs against my lips.

"I shall have to make it an agenda of mine to steal more of your clothes then." I kiss him back and feel the lean muscles of his chest and skin. I remove his jacket that has him bound and it falls like leaves towards the forest floor. He growls lowly as he slides his hand lower towards my thigh once more grabbing my leg and placing his close to his body. I cease from kissing him and he looks at me oddly. He sparkles, so beautifully, I have to admire him.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"Edward…" I begin I know I shouldn't say it in fact It's totally the wrong and most inappropriate time to say it. "I'm scared." He lets my leg go and places his hand on his chest,

"Of me? Well, you should be," he teases ushering me closer. I shake my head and break away from his embrace.

"No, of how we could hurt people. Like Jacob and…" I don't want to say her name but I know she has to come up sooner or later. "And Bella." Edward nods his head and I know that after this conversation that we're about to have nothing will ever be the same.