Luna Lovegood and the Dark Lord's Diary

by The madness in me

Tom Riddle's plans fall through when Ginny Weasley loses his diary shortly after starting her first year and it is found by one Luna Lovegood. A series of bizarre conversations follow. Luna? - Yes Tom? - I've been giving this a lot of thought...and I believe you may be insane. (Not crack. I repeat, not crack ! Plot takes a few chapters to appear but it's there)

11. Choices

If you had the option would you rather be a Hornwinged snuffle trout or a Pulley-tot?

I'd rather be a Wizard and I'd rather you be some sort of insect so I could tread on you and grind down you into the ground

Don't be mean Tom, that's not how the game is played.

I didn't realise I was playing.

Well you are.

I think I'll pass.

If you play, I'll agree to stop putting things inside your pages.

I have your word on that?

Yes.

Fine...I'd rather be the second one. Whatever it was.

The Pulley-tot? Really? But they are so slimy!

I can't win with you can I?