Time seemed to snowball quickly after Christmas. Arthur was released from the hospital, Harry was told he would be working with Snape to learn Occlumancy, and the Order met twice in the week after Christmas.

Remus had hoped for a free moment alone with Tonks, to give her her gift before he lost his nerve. But she arrived at the meetings just as they were to start and often left just as they ended. She was busy with both work and the Order and he was afraid she thought he had forgotten about her.

"Looks like Tonks won't be joining us tonight," Sirius said, walking into the drawing room several days after Christmas.

Remus looked up, surprised. "I thought she was working."

"I invited her to come over tonight for New Years, but she just sent me an owl saying she was tired and going to make an early night of it."

"That sucks," Ginny said from where she sat on the floor playing with Crookshanks.

"She was going to play winner of out tournament," Harry added from where he was playing wizard's chess with Ron.

"Don't worry, she can play me next time she comes over," Ron teased.

"What are you talking about? I just beat you!"

"I let you win. Besides, we're playing best out of three so the first game doesn't even count."

"I'll play the winner," Sirius offered, falling onto the sofa next to Hermione.

Remus checked his watch and saw it was still early. "Harry, would you mind if I borrowed Hedwig?"

"No, go ahead," Harry said absently, studying the board in front of him.

Sirius grinned at his friend and nodded.

Tonks pulled her boots off and wiggled her toes. She felt bad about turning down the invitations she had received, both from Sirius and her friends at the office, but she was exhausted and knew she wouldn't be able to make it to midnight.

Since she returned from her parent's house late Christmas night, she had averaged about four hours of sleep each night. Now that she finally had some time off, she planned on spending it unconscious. Pouring herself a glass of wine from the bottle her Secret Santa had given her, Tonks propped her feet up on the coffee table and sat back to relax.

"What now?" She groaned when there was a tapping on the window. If it had been any other owl than Hedwig, she would have ignored it. "What have you got for me girl?" She asked, opening the window and ignoring the burst of cold air.

As soon as the parchment was removed from her leg, Hedwig flew in to warm herself by the fire.

Tonks unrolled the parchment and immediately recognized Remus' neat handwriting.

Tonks,

I hope you don't think I'm being forward, but I was hoping I could take a moment of your time to speak with you tonight. I know it is short notice, but if you're free please let me know.

Yours,

Remus

Tonks read his note three times, chewing on her bottom lip.

"Who am I kidding?" She asked Hedwig. "Of course I want to see him."

She dug into the drawer of her end table and found a spare bit of parchment. "Is this why you're still here?" Tonks asked the owl. "Are you waiting for a response?"

Hedwig hooted and clicked her beak.

"Here." Tonks attached the parchment to her leg. "Take this to Remus."

Hedwig hesitated a second before leaving the warmth of the fireplace for the cold December night.

Tonks shut the window behind her and turned to look around the flat. It was clean enough and she had just recently finished unpacking everything. Looking down, she took in theold jeans she was wearing and a sweatshirt emblazoned with The Chudley Cannons. She wasn't so much a fan of the team as she was a fan of the bright orange.

"I guess I could try and make myself look presentable." She hurried back to her bedroom where clothes were tossed over the bed, the floor, and the chair. Digging through the pile on the chair, she could find nothing to make her happy. Feeling frustrated, she whirled around and found what she was looking for halfway under her bed. The green sweater had been a Christmas gift from her aunt. It was a bright green and fitted, the yarn was the softest she had ever felt and it complimented her pink hair.

Yanking off her sweatshirt, she tugged the sweater on. If she kept her arms down, it laid nicely, but if she raised her arms, it slid up past her bellybutton. Stopping in front of the mirror that hung over her bureau, she studied her image. Her hair was her trademark bubble gum pink and her eyes their natural dark brown. Shifting through the bottles and tubes on top of her dresser, she dabbed on a little lip gloss and sprayed a bit more perfume on.

When the quiet knock came, she hurried out to the living room, forgetting to put shoes on. "Who is it?"

"It's, uh, it's me, Remus."

The first thing she noticed when she opened the door was that above the worn and patched robe, wrapped snuggly around his neck was the scarf. She couldn't help but smile as she met his eyes. The second thing she noticed was how pale and tired he looked. Of course, she thought. The full moon is in two days.

The first thing he noticed was her scent, the rich vanilla perfume that mingled pleasantly with the scent that was uniquely her. The second thing he noticed was the way her short sweater and old jeans clung to every curve and made his blood boil.

"Remus, come in, come in. Oh, it's a cold night, isn't it?"

"Yes it is," he smiled as she stepped aside to let him in. "Good thing I have this handsome new scarf."

"You like it?" She asked, pleased.

"Very much."

A pleasant blush colored her cheeks as she shut and locked the door. "Have a seat, please make yourself at home. I was just having some wine, would you like some?"

"I don't want you to go to any trouble."

"Don't be silly, please sit. I do enjoy a good wine, it is a little luxury I indulge in from time to time. And this wine was a gift, so it's a better one than I can normally afford, and the only thing better than indulging in a good wine is indulging with a friend."

Remus stood in her living room, watching as she walked to a cupboard in the corner to retrieve a glass and return, all while talking and not missing a beat. He couldn't help but appreciate the way she moved, the sway of her hips, the way her bare feet padded across the floor. When she reached up to grab the stemmed wine glass, her sweater rose up, exposing a smooth span of creamy, pale skin and he had the silliest thought about it would taste liketo press his lips to her stomach, just above her bellybutton.

"Please, sit, make yourself comfortable," she instructed as she poured a glass of wine for him and topped off her own glass.

Remus unwound the scarf and removed his robes, laying them over the rocking chair. He sat on the sofa and accepted the glass from her. "Thank you."

Tonks sat on the other end of the sofa, tucking her legs under her, facing him. She raised her glass and smiled. "To a happy new year."

"Happy new year." He tapped the edge of his glass against hers before tasting it. "Oh, that is quite good."

"Yes it is, isn't it? I was lucky, Kingsley picked my name for Secret Santa and he and I had talked wine several times before."

"He has good taste. So, uh, how was your Christmas?"

"Oh, it was lovely, nice to see the folks again and the family from my dad's side. We had a big dinner at my grandmother's. I still have leftovers. There are plenty of cookies if you'd like some."

"Oh, thank you, but no, Molly has kept us all quite full."

"Yes, I bet she is. How was your Christmas?"

"It was excellent. It has been quite a while since I shared Christmas with friends." He immediately regretted saying that when he saw the look of pity cross her face. "But it was great, and I can't remember the last time Sirius was that happy."

"I'm glad to hear that. I had hoped to spend more time with you all, but it has been so hectic this past week. I do feel bad about turning down his invitation, but I was so tired, I just thought I would turn in early tonight."

"Oh, of course, I won't keep you."

Tonks laid a hand on his arm to keep him from rising. "That was not a hint for you to go. I'm glad you're here."

Remus hesitated, staring down at the dark liquid in his glass. He wasn't quite sure how to respond.

She cleared her throat and sipped her wine. "What was it you wished to speak with me about?"

He looked up at her. "I'm sorry?"

"The note you sent me said you wanted to speak with me."

"Oh, yes." Remus was overtaken with a sudden case of nerves. What am I doing? He thought as he took a large gulp of wine. What if she doesn't like it? What if I am making a colossal fool of myself? He looked up and saw her watching him. His heart skipped a beat. Too late now.

"I want you to know how much I really like my scarf," he began.

Again, color flooded her cheeks as she grinned. "I'm glad to hear that."

"I don't want you to think I forgot about you. I had hoped to see you before Christmas, but we were both so busy. I do have a gift for you." He reached into his pocket and pulled out the small, carefully wrapped box.

"Remus," she sighed, touched. "You didn't have to get me anything."

"I wanted to."

Tonks couldn't help but notice how his hand trembled slightly as he offered her the gift. She set her glass on the table and took it from him, her fingers brushed against his, sending a pleasant tingle up her arm. She could feel his eyes on her as she tugged at the ribbon. "Did you wrap it yourself?" She asked.

He thought it an odd question, but he nodded. "Yes."

"You did a lovely job."

"Thank you."

With her heart racing, Tonks peeled back red paper, uncovering an old cardboard jewelry box with worn corners and tear on one edge of the top. Gently lifting the lid, she gasped. "Oh, Remus, it's beautiful. I-I can't accept this."

"I'd like you to have it," he said quietly.

She lifted the delicate brooch. It was bar shaped and made of silver filigree, in the center was a small diamond. Obviously an antique, she could only imagine what it had cost him. She lifted her eyes to his. "I don't know what to say."

Her expression spoke volumes and Remus felt his heart melt. He was so glad he had given her the brooch, seeing her now, he knew he had made the right decision.

Acting on impulse, Tonks leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Thank you so much."

Feeling a bit flustered, Remus ran a shaky hand through his hair. "You, uh, you're very welcome."

Enjoying the fact that she could have that effect on him, Tonks slid a little closer to him.

He fought the urge to move away from her. There was a definite pull he was feeling but chose to blame the alcohol and he set his glass on the table. "I'm, uh, I'm glad you…you like it," he stammered. "Thank you for the wine, but I should be getting back to…to the house."

"Remus, please don't run away."

"I'm not."

She leaned closer, stopping just inches from him. "Why are you so nervous?"

"I really should be going," he said weakly as her scent and body heat permeated his personal space.

Tonks gently touched his cheek, forcing him to look at her. "Thank you," she breathed, going the rest of the way to gently touch her lips to his.

No! A voice screamed inside his head even as his arms came up to encircle her. This isn't right!

She leaned closer to him, causing him to lie back against the arm of the sofa. Stretching out on top of him, pinning him beneath her, Tonks slid her hands up to weave her fingers through his hair.

Remus was sure his body was acting completely separate from his mind. He couldn't remember the last time he had held a woman like this, feeling her body and soul. His hands raced down her sides and up her back as her mouth assaulted his. He couldn't feel enough of her and goosebumps rose on her skin as he slid his hands under her sweater and over the smooth satin of her back.

A whimper escaped her as she felt his rough hands on her. She broke the kiss and took a moment to lift her head and look at him. Love coursed through her and she felt her heart would burst with it. But now was not the time for words she decided as she pressed her lips to his neck, feeling the moan vibrate from within his throat.

Stop! You have to stop this before it goes any further! Remus continued to ignore the voice of reason in his head and went on with his selfish need to touch her.

Tonks let out a groan of pleasure when she felt his erection against her leg. The fact that she did that to him only excited her more and she pressed her body even harder against him.

"Tonks." His voice was even more hoarse as he slid his hands up her arms to disentangle himself from her.

"Remus," she murmured, misunderstanding his actions.

"No, please, we have to stop."

She hadn't expected that and she lifted her head to look down on him. His lips were a bit swollen, his hair mused, and his cheeks flushed. She thought he had never looked sexier. "What?"

"We have to stop this."

"Why?"

"Because I can't do this," he replied gruffly.

"I don't understand."

Remus gently pushed her off him and stood. "I can't do this."

"Remus."

He caught the hurt in her voice and it broke him a bit. "It isn't you, Tonks, it's me."

"I've heard that before," she muttered, pouring more wine into her glass.

"You just don't understand."

"Explain it to me then."

"I'm poor…"

"I don't care."

"…I'm thirteen years older than you…"

"I can add and I don't care."

"…and I'm a werewolf."

She stood abruptly, setting her glass on the table with a loud snap. "I am fully aware of what you are. You are a thick-headed prat is what you are! You think I care about money? I am not that shallow…"

"I never said you were, it's just that…"

She held her hand up, signaling for him to shut his mouth. "You're a smart, kind man with a good heart and great sense of humor. You have so much more to offer than money or possessions. Age is just a number, nothing else. And as for being a werewolf, that is just a small part of what you are. You have it under control and you've already shown you can live with it. What I don't understand is why you keep trying to use those weak excuses to push me away when I don't plan on going any where."

He wasn't prepared for the emotions her words stirred up inside him. Picking up his robe, he slipped it on over his old trousers and jumper. "I, uh, I wanted to thank you for my gift. It is getting, um, getting late, I don't want to keep you."

"Remus," she began weakly, unsure how to finish.

Her tone cut at him and he could hear the tears in her voice. Being around her was slowly killing him and he decided then and there that he had to put a stop to it. "I, uh, I guess I'll see you in a few days when we get the children back to Hogwarts."

Tonks nodded, refusing to let him know how hurt she was. "Take care, Remus."

He nodded and, still not looking at her, walked toward the door. "You too."

She followed him, biting hard on her bottom lip, fighting to keep back the sob that was trying to escape. "Happy new year."

Unlocking the door, he turned to look at her. She was staring at the door, her lip caught between her teeth, her eyes moist. "Happy new year," he whispered.

A quick, sharp knock on the door had them both jumping.

"Who-who is it?" Tonks called out, unable to control the quiver in her voice.

"It's me, Tonks, come on, I know you don't really want to spend new years alone!" Paul Dunne called cheerfullythrough the door.

She took a deep breath and tried to keep a rein on her emotions. If Remus didn't want to be with her then she really just wanted to be alone. Looking up at the man in front of her she saw what she thought was a look of condescending pity. Hurt by his rejection, she tilted her chin up in defiance and glared at him while she yanked open the door. With her eyes still on Remus, she addressed Paul. "You're right, I really don't want to be alone. Come on in, let me change real quick and we'll go over to Nigel and Lindsay's party."

"Really?" Dunne asked, surprised.

"Yes, really. Good night, Remus."

Lupin hesitated a moment before nodding. "Good night, Tonks, Paul."

"Good night, Remus," Paul said as the other man slipped out into the hall and down the steps.

Tonks stared at the spot where Remus had stood just a second ago.

"Tonks?"

She looked over at her friend and partner. Here was a perfectly nice guy who was interested in her, why couldn't she return his feelings? Why couldn't she just forget Remus and move on to someone who wouldn't push her away? Why did she have to love the one guy who wouldn't return her feelings?

"Are you sure you want to go?" Paul asked quietly.

She nodded, determined. "I've never been more sure of anything in my life."