Finally a turning point in this story! I can't believe that we are eleven chapters in and there hasn't even been any supernatural yet! But this is definitely a chapter before some stuff goes down and it will also give you a better insight into Natalie's mind. I know some of you hate her and think she is selfish...and maybe she is, but aren't we all?
"The fairytales lied,
And the Disney movies died.
'Cuz I'm not some kind of princess,
That's been locked up inside.
I've been led to believe that love comes for free,
But I'm learning quickly that nothings as it seems."
-Glitter, Drew Tabor
Nikita.
I didn't want to go anywhere the next day.
And neither did Ava.
I learned that when Natalie and Ava where really young, Ava wouldn't go anywhere without her big sister. If Natalie stayed home from school sick, Ava insisted on staying home too. If Natalie refused to go to one of Ava's lacrosse games, Ava suddenly hadn't wanted to play that day. It was sad, really, because apparently Natalie would complain about Ava wanting to be like her and then would proceed to ignore her the entire day.
So I did just the opposite.
Ava stayed in my room all night, running her fingers through my hair and holding me while I cried.
"Okay, so you broke up with him? Just call him and tell him you're sorry and didn't mean it. Everyone loves you, he'll get back together with you in a second!" She insisted. I shook my head and buried my face in her shoulder. "But you have to get back together with Seth. He's so cute and he's so nice to me." I hadn't realized how close to tears she was until that point, though I'm not really sure why she wanted to cry. "All your boyfriends are so mean to me. They're not nice but Seth was nice to me. If he saw me at school then he would smile and wave and he didn't treat me like some little kid who didn't deserve to know him."
"You're going to hate me." I blurted out as I processed her words.
"What? I could never hate you!" She insisted, her eyes wide. And I believed her. She could never hate Natalie. Even when Natalie was horrible and mean and ignored her, she would never hate her.
Unfortunately, I was Nikita.
So I would not be forgiven.
By anyone.
Natalie.
I boarded the train with some other Los Angelers and chose an empty row I could sit comfortably in. I had left Saturday evening and had to switch trains a few times but by early morning on Sunday had ended up in Oregon, heading towards Everett and - even better - La Push. This time I had taken the train to Everett instead of all the way to Seattle. Everett had a bus station and I would then be able to take a bus to Port Angeles where Nikita could pick me up. I shut my eyes and dozed for a little, only waking up five minutes before my stop. I was so eager to be off this train but knew getting on a bus wouldn't be much better. When I finally stumbled off the train and over to the ticket window to buy my bus ticket, I was surging with energy. Tonight I would be sleeping in my own bed. Tonight I would see my family. Tonight I would be in La Push.
"Next bus should be here in about twenty-five minutes." The woman standing at the ticket counter drawled before sliding my crumpled bills towards herself and my ticket to home towards me.
"Thank you!" I chirped, more cheerful than usual on an early Sunday morning, before pulling out my old, makeshift cell phone and calling Nikita.
"Hello?" Her voice was soft and she didn't sound as cheery as I felt.
"Nikki, Baby! Hi!" I laughed, walking over to a vending machine and putting money in to get a water.
"Hey, Natalie." She whispered back. Her voice sounded scratchy and she sounded upset.
"What's wrong?" I asked, pausing for a moment before selecting the drink I wanted.
"I...broke up with my boyfriend." She muttered. "I'm sad." I frowned and grabbed my drink before walking over to an abandoned bench.
"Oh…right. I didn't realize you were still hung up on that." I admitted, opening my water and taking a swig.
"He was my boyfriend." She gritted out. "What type of person do you think I am?"
"Sorry!" I apologized quickly. Actually, I thought she was just having fun while I was gone. I thought she just needed some entertainment and Seth had been the first person she saw, his locker being next to mine. But I kept my mouth shut.
"Did you need something?" She asked tiredly.
"Actually, I'm going to need you to pick me up in Port Angeles at 4:15 this afternoon." I responded. I smiled at her intake of breath.
"What?" She gasped, suddenly brightening up. "Really? You're coming home!"
"Yes!" I squealed. "I'm somewhere in northern Oregon right now. I've been on trains all night. I have two busses and then I'll be at the bus station. You'll pick me up, right?"
"Of course!" She laughed, sounding much happier than she had moments before. "I'm so excited!"
"Me too." I giggled. "I've missed everyone and everything and...well, you of course."
"I've missed you too." She admitted. "A lot."
"When I get back we can be real sisters." I promised.
"Real sisters." She repeated.
"Okay, I've got to go but I'll see you later." I said.
"Okay, bye!"
"Natalie!"
I spun around and got to witness Nikita's face light up as she sprinted in my direction and threw her arms around me. I dropped my bag to the ground and wrapped my arms around her.
"Nikita!" I squealed before pulling back.
"I missed you." She breathed and I noticed she looked close to tears.
"I missed you too." I replied softly before leaning down to pick up my bag. "It feels so good to be back in Washington!"
"Thank God you're back, I don't think I could have handled another day pretending to be you." She sighed, leading me towards my car.
"It is a pretty hard life, huh?" I murmured. "And it's definitely hard to fill my shoes." She made a face but stayed quiet. "Speaking of shoes, what are you wearing on your feet?"
"Uh, sneakers." She stated the obvious, glancing between her feet and me.
"I know what sneakers are. I just don't understand why you are wearing them when you're not at the gym!" I let out an exasperated sigh. She had a lot to learn. "Never mind. I can drive, right?"
"Uh...it's your car." She reminded me.
"Oh, right!" I laughed, grabbing the keys from her and unlocking the car. After tossing my bag into the back seat and sliding into the front, I started the car. After Nikki had gotten into the passenger side, we were off. I expected her to ask questions, want to know what I had found out, at least ask me what had happened, but instead she stayed silent and just looked out the window.
Whatever.
She didn't say anything until I had pulled up to the little motel near Forks Middle School. I parked and was out of the car before she could ask what was going on.
"Wait!" She gasped, opening her door. "What are you doing?" I paused as she unbuckled her seatbelt and got out of the car.
"Well, we can't exactly both go back to my house...it's kinda a dead giveaway. You need to stay here for a day or two until I can tell my parents and get my life back under control." I explained. I mean, duh! We couldn't just walk through La Push together without having everything sorted out.
"I have to stay here?"
"Just for a day or two, promise." I assured her. She stared blankly at me for a few moments and finally I just sighed and walked back over to the car, reaching into the backseat and grabbing the bag I had brought with me to LA. "I have a bunch of magazines in here and some fast food menus that you can look at. And I can come over tomorrow and see you."
"Oh...well...I guess…" She conceded.
"Good!" I skipped forward, handing over the bag and giving her a kiss on the cheek. "You're the best sister ever!" A genuine smile graced her features and she tucked some of her hair behind her right ear before nodding her head happily.
I handed over almost the rest of the cash I had with me to the old man at the counter and booked a single room for one night but told him I might be booking it for a second night. He nodded and didn't ask any questions, just had me fill out a form with my name - I wrote Nikita's - and gave me a room key. Thank God I didn't know that many people in Forks or this could have gone bad. Of course no one in a small town would care about details at a little motel and, for that, I couldn't be happier.
"Okay...well…" Nikki trailed off as I looked around the dinky room. "I'll see you...tomorrow? Right?"
"Of course and there's some granola bars and fortune cookies in the bag if you get hungry." I offered.
"Uh-huh."
"Oh, and can I have my phone back?" I remembered. She reached into her pocket and handed over my slick iPhone. I had missed this baby. We paused for a few moments and just stared at each other. It really was creepy how similar we looked. We were identical and I still hadn't been able to find a key difference between us. Even our voiced were the same - though Nikita's was definitely softer than mine. "Wellllll...bye!" I sent her a quick wave, turned on my heel, then pranced out of the room, shutting the door behind me. I think I heard her say bye after the door was shut.
Whatever.
I had things to do, people to see, people to...do?
I needed to find Lucas, explain myself. I needed to see Dakota and Spencer. I knew they missed me. And, of course, I had to see my family. I had missed everyone.
Hello, gross moss-covered everything! Hello, damp ground! Hello, La Push!
I've missed you.
I wrenched open the front door that I hadn't used in over two weeks. I wasn't sure how exactly I had let my trip last as long as it did but it was over now and I could finally get on with my life...and figure out how to integrate Nikita into it.
"Ah!" I yelped, grabbing onto the little table by our front door as I almost face planted. I had tripped over Ava's boots that had not been put away. I glared at them and straightened myself. "Ava!" I screeched. "Are you trying to kill me?"
"Nat?" She called in a panic, rushing down the stairs. She spotted the boots and gulped. "I am so sorry! I completely forgot to put them away! Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." I snapped, losing patience for her and watched as the light faded from her eyes. I pushed past her and started up towards my room. Sleeping in crapy motels with stains on the comforters was not what I was used to and I had missed my beautiful room with my fluffy pillows and array of eyeshadows.
My door that was usually closed was wide open and I inched closer to it, wondering what would possess Nikita to leave my bedroom door open. My mom might go through my stuff or Ava might steal my clothes. It should not be left open. I walked quickly into the room and suppressed a groan. My room was clean and I hated it.
The makeup that had covered my vanity was now either organized neatly or put away. Little did anyone know that the mess of the different products had been organized to me. My nail polish was no longer lined up on the window sills and clothes appeared to be hung in the closet.
I could kill Nikita.
My iPhone vibrated and I jumped in surprise. I hadn't had my phone with me in what seemed like forever. I opened the text. Seth. Of course.
*Can we talk? I'd like to at least be friends…*
I almost laughed. Almost.
What I wanted to write back was that I'd rather gorge my eyes out, but I decided that it wouldn't do Nikki any good and I didn't want her mad at me so instead I ignored it. Not like it was important anyway. Besides, what idiot wants to be friends with their ex? And they were dating for, like, a day.
"Want me to stay in here again tonight?" Ava asked from the doorway, offering me a small smile.
"I'd rather gorge my eyes out."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
She stood there for a few seconds.
"You can leave now."
Dakota always says that beautiful people should never date each other. She says that together they just don't generate enough attention. When both people are beautiful, neither are beautiful. Together, as a couple, they are less than what they should be. They cancel each other out.
This is part of the reason why Nikita can't date Seth. Nikki looks just like me so of course she is beautiful...gorgeous even. And - while I hate to admit it - Seth is hot. He is a beautiful He-Men Hottie and I guess he's a nice guy. If he was uglier and drug-free I'd definitely approve.
I don't know. Maybe. Probably.
"Four, thirty-six, twenty-two." Dakota trilled loyally from her spot, leaning against the locker next to mine. I sent her a smile and she winked back. It was as if nothing had changed. And maybe it hadn't...maybe things were exactly as I had left it. "Jeez, I missed you." She sighed, smiling wide.
"Missed you too, Boo." I cooed, opening the locker and rummaging through my things that were most definitely not how I left them. "Do you know where my chemistry book is?"
"My locker." A deep, sad voice answered. I froze momentarily before motioning for Dakota to move aside. She quickly hurried away from Seth's locker and flanked me on my left side
"And why would they be there?" I snapped before I could help it.
"Because you don't have enough room in your locker with all the clothes and makeup you keep in there." Seth. He explained the reason my books aren't in my locker so calmly and nicely that I was a little thrown.
"Oh, of course." I muttered and suddenly Spencer was on my right side - having abandoned her flirting session with Cole - with her hands on her hips and ready to back me up.
"Can I walk you to class, maybe talk?" He suggested, running a hand through his hair as he pulled both of our chemistry books off the top shelf of his locker and handed over mine.
"If I wanted to talk, I would have answered the phone." I insisted, crossing my arms.
"Yeah, she doesn't want anything to do with you." Dakota pointed out.
"You should just leave her alone." Spencer continued, flipping her hair behind her right shoulder. I watched as Seth's eyes moved away from his locker to glare at my two friends.
"Can you call off your minions, Nat?" He gritted. The nickname shot through me. He was close enough to Nikita that he used nicknames for her…? I shook my head, shaking off my hesitation and also answering no to his question.
"Puh-lease, like you're flying solo." I accused, nodding in the direction of Brady and Collin. They were standing behind him and both looking at me with confusion and betrayal. I focused back on Seth and, for the first time, stared him straight in the eyes. He froze for a moment before squinting slightly. "What?" I asked, breaking him out of his revere.
"Guys, go on, I'll see you at lunch." He waved Collin and Brady away. They both glanced at each other before shrugging and heading off in the direction of their next class.
"Kota, Spence, wait for me at the water fountain." I ordered.
"But-" Dakota started.
"No."
"Natalie!" Spencer protested.
"Now."
"You know, you really shouldn't talk to your friends like that. Maybe you'll wake up one day and realize you don't have any left." He sighed as my two best friends left me alone to talk to my ex-boyfriend...well, Nikki's ex-boyfriend. My mouth dropped in surprise and I really hoped Dakota and Spencer hadn't heard what he said. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said that." His quick apology surprised me.
"No, go for it. You can say whatever you want because we're not together anymore." I replied coldly.
"Nat...Natalie, what happened? And don't give me some crap answer about Lucas...I know something else happened. I just don't get it…" He trailed off. "Everything was fine and now...well…" He swallowed.
"What?"
"You're just...different…and I don't understand." He admitted.
"Different?" I sucked in a breath.
"Yeah...I mean, you look the same but you just seem different than the girl I spent everyday with for the past two weeks." He looked guilty as he said the words and I cocked my head to the side in confusion. He had only been with me for five minutes and somehow he just knew I wasn't his Natalie.
"Hmm...interesting…" I murmured, studying him for a second longer. "Maybe I misjudged you...give me a day or two." I turned away and started towards my friends who were waiting by the fountain for me.
"Wait. Natalie, I don't understand." He called after me, but I just ignored him, heading towards Chemistry, both the girls following me.
"So...Nat," Spencer finally spoke up. "I think Cole may really like me." I glanced towards her and she was nodding, looking expectantly at me. "He doesn't have a date to the Winter Ball yet and I think he's going to ask me."
"That's great, Spence." Dakota encouraged, giving her the reaction she was obviously hoping for. Dakota looked at me and both girls waited for me to say something. I rolled my eyes.
"Spencer, I love you, but we all know Cole is never going to date you. Ever. So you should just drop it." I insisted, giving her the truth. Cole had been flirting with her for the past few months without making any move towards something permanent. He wasn't going to date her. He just wasn't.
"Nikki said I should go for it." She whispered softly and I could see the hurt that flittered across her face. "She said that she thinks he likes me, even if I'm too good for him." It was possibly one of the most hurtful things she could say to me. Comparing me to my sister and indicating that Nikita was better than me on some level. I stopped dead in my tracks and spun around to face her.
"Well, Nikki's not here." I shot back. "And she doesn't know anything anyway." She turned on her heel and headed away from us towards her math class. Dakota and I stood there for a few silent moments. "Come on, Kota, we need to get to Chemistry." She followed without another word.
"Hey, Jake." I smiled flirtatiously as I took my seat in front of him in English. His eyes widened before he narrowed them at me.
"Hey."
He sounded colder than usual and I couldn't hide my surprise. Ariana was staring at me wide eyed from her seat by his side. I hadn't seen her in weeks, she had been absent for two weeks before I had left and she looked different. I gave her a once over, not impressed. Clearly she had joined the cult and taken some steroids. She looked uncomfortable and confused by my gaze which was weird but I just turned back to Jake and smiled.
"So, what's up?" I asked, twirling a piece of my hair.
"Nothing." He answered tightly. "What's up with you?"
"Oh, you know, nothing." I responded, offering him a smile. "Spencer thinks that Cole is going to ask her to the dance, how delusional is that?" I laughed slightly but they both just stared blankly at me. Tough crowd.
"Why are you being a bitch?" Ariana finally asked. "Why did you break up with Seth, you're his-"
"Ari."
"But they're-"
"Ariana."
She gave him a submissive look before glancing down at the notebook that was sitting on her desk. I narrowed my eyes. Ariana and I weren't friends or even acquaintances, where did she get the right to call me a bitch?
"You should control your gang members, Jacob, maybe put a muzzle on her." I scowled. Her head snapped up and, as if to prove me right, she let out a low growl. I jumped in surprise, almost falling off my chair. "Did she just growl at me?" I squeaked. But Jake just slid an arm around her neck, pulling her close, and acted as if it never happened.
"Class is starting, Natalie, you should get your homework out." He said and I knew this was the end of our conversation. I also knew that I had no idea what my homework was or if Nikita had even done it.
Well, shit.
Nikita.
"Knock, knock!" A voice called from outside the door. I shot up from the bed I had been lying on and flung open the door, surprised by who was there but happy nonetheless. "Nikita!" Dakota exclaimed, smiling wide and pulling me into a one armed hug. "I come baring food." She produced a takeout container from The Diner the she had been holding in her other hand.
"Dakota! Thank you!" I smiled, taking the food from her. "I am starving." The granola bars and fortune cookies just weren't cutting it and after reading through all the Chinese takeout menus, I was even hungrier.
"Natalie said she would visit later but she got invited to hand out with Jake and the gang so she sent me over to see you." Dakota explained. I paused mid-bite of a delicious looking chicken nugget.
"With...with Seth?" I asked. She nodded, looking semi-apologetic before changing the subject.
"Anyway, can I call you Nikki?" She asked, resting her elbows on the little table and laying her head in her hands. "Or maybe Nix?"
"If-if you want." I responded.
"Great!" She announced. "Though I do really like Nikita, it's a pretty badass name. We'll get you some leather jackets and black healed boots and then we'll be all set!"
"Sure, Dakota." I agreed, just glad that someone was with me and talking to me. It had gotten rather lonely in the little motel room. There were only so many Spanish soap operas on and only so many times you could read Wah Sing Sai's lunch menu before you felt like slamming your head against the wall. I ate some more of the food while she fiddled with her phone before I finally getting the courage to talk to her about something that was bugging me and that I wanted to clarify. "Um, you and Spencer are not mad at Natalie or me, right?" I asked. She gave me a confused look.
"Of course not."
"I just mean...I didn't tell you...we didn't…"
"Oh. Oh!" She interrupted, recognition flittered across her face. "Oh Honey, of course I'm not mad at you. Spencer and I knew the entire time."
"You knew?" I questioned. The words sounded funny to me even as I repeated them back to her.
"Yes, of course." She rolled her eyes. "Natalie is our best friend so of course she would tell us about you. I mean, it was Spencer's idea that you guys switch places. I have to say though, when I saw you on that Monday morning, I swear I thought it was still her and that she hadn't made the switch. You guys just look so much alike, it's crazy. I just - hey, are you okay? What's wrong?"
"Excuse me?" I pushed back the chair and stood up so fast that it knocked over and she jumped in surprise.
"We knew." She repeated slowly. "We knew you weren't Natalie."
OKAY! I wanted this out about a week and a half ago but I've been working way too much and I decided to make this chapter even longer than I anticipated. The next chapter is almost done though which is really good! It will probably be up in a week or so.
I also want to let everyone know that I am almost finished with my Kim and Jared story: Wonderland that takes place in my Kills World. There are only a few more chapters left and then I will be continuing in that world with my Jake/OC story: Acid Annie. It won't be required to read Wonderland to understand Acid Annie but it definitely helps and I wanted to let you guys know so that if you do plan to read Acid Annie and want to read Wonderland first, you could start now. For more information on Acid Annie, I will be posting a special summary for it at the end of the next chapter of Wonderland that should be out soon.
Finally, check out my tumblr for exclusive content, pictures, and to ask any questions. I recently posted a list of a few of my favorite Kim and Jared stories and I posted the link to my Goodreads so if either of those things interest you, check out the link in my profile!
Thanks for sticking with this story and I hoped this chapter lived up to your expectations. I know the end was a little bomb that I dropped and I am curious to see if anyone thought that or had suspected Spencer and Dakota knowing. I had only officially told one person about my plan for them to know but if any of you read Break You Hard, you might have suspected it. Let me know!
XOXOC