Beautiful Disaster
A/N: You people are just made of pure awesomeness! I love you all! You were just so supportive and you sent me Jazz! yay. LOL anywya this chapter may be a lil' deppresive because i wrote it after a really off day so you might get a little down...when you read it. anyway sorry it took me so long! it's just school has been kicking my ass lately and i finally got my break! so yay more action for the lovely readers.Btw this chapter is in a third person POV just not anyone from the fic. Anyway. review and i will love you unconditionally and irrevocably ;)
He thinks it's wrong. No. He knows it is wrong
The wires are all over her body, some are in her chest, and her slow heartbeat is the only sound that fills the cold hospital room. Rosalie likes to pretend that she doesn't know that her heart pounds everytime he talks.
He was there during the whole weekend. Rosalie was there too. He's pretty sure this is the first time that Rosalie Hale hasn't showered in four days. Her t-shirt stills has some dry blood in the border. She constantly runs her fingers through her blonde long hair and sighs out in frustration. She freaked out when she first saw him there. She screamed and shouted during almost an hour.
He didn't answer a word. Just sat there and held Bella's hand. Her dark hair is falling all over the pillow. But there are some wires in her head too. There was even one in her hand. With a needle. He knows Bella hates needles, so he covers it with the blanket, he doesn't want to cause her any more pain. At night he stays there too. But she doesn't talk in her sleep anymore and he realises how much he misses the low sound of her voice.
Carlise comes by Sunday morning, he says he has to go to school. He blinks, twice and nods. Monday morning he kisses her cold, almost dead-cold, hand and leaves. Rosalie is still sleeping in the couch.
Alice rambles and asks where the hell he was and that strangely Esme is not mad. She brings up Rosalie and Bella, but Jessica drops it. He can see that Alice won't let it go, in her eyes, she's curious, more than that she's worried. Emmet and Jasper know, he's sure. But they know that Rosalie will break down if they show up. And no one's ready to see Rosalie Lillian Hale break down. She was the strong one after all.
He'll never admit that he heard her cry every single night he was there.
He goes back when school day is over. He sits in his chair near Bella's bed. Her heart beats a little lower and her hands feel a little colder everyday. He kisses them everyday and holds them, to try to warm them up. Her face is pale and he notices the little scar in her forehead. Rosalie says she fell. He should've known, Bella always falls, he only knows that for the last three months he has been there to catch her.
Sadly not in every way.
When he comes in one morning he kisses her on the lips. Softly. But he misses how bittersweet her breath in his mouth tasted. He grins at the sound of her raced heartbeat but the grin turns into a simple nothing as soon as he remembers why he's there. Rosalie bits her lip and says she's leaving for half an hour to get clothes and a shower.
He knows she won't be back for at least two hours, because she needs to be alone and accept that her cousin is in a coma. Maybe she'll call her parents finally. He doesn't want her to thought. Because they'll come and take Bella away. And he doesn't recognize the unbereable loneliness that fills his chest when he thinks about it.
Because even if he only knows what her favourite color is he can't imagine falling asleep before kissing her red lips and seeing her blush creep slowly up her cheeks, or how she bits her lips when she's nervous or asks him to go away when she wants him to stay.
Of course he would never admit noticing this things after Bella wakes up.
Because she has to wake up. He needs her to wake up.
An hour later Rosalie enters the room, her eyes are swollen and he knows she has been crying but she doesn't mention it. Alice walks behind her. Alice must have heard her, she looks at him with a mixture of anger and pity in her eyes. That eventually turn into pity.
He's sure that his eyes are full of pain, but he can take them off of Bella for more than a brief second so he turns around. And there she's, helpless. And somehow when he looks at her he feels like he's the one who's altered and that he can't fix it.
He wants to see her beautiful brown eyes, that haunt him when he manages to fall asleep. Always holding her hand.
Because if he has to admit even if he has to admit it out loud that he can barely imagine life without seeing those brown eyes everyday, even if he lived 17 years without them, if that confession will bring Bella back he would. But he knows it won't.
"She's not going to wake up, is she?" Rosalie whispers one night
He doesn't answer. Hope is all he has left after all.
Because if he had to do something, something he'd never thought he would.
Even if he had to admit that he was falling in love with Isabella Swan. (He knew her middle name was Marie)
He would.
---
'How long has it been since you ate something Edward?' Rosalie asks
"A while." Two weeks "I want to be here when she wakes up."
"Go..." she waits "Go it'll take a minute."
He got up. Her heart pounded.
He sat down again.
"I'm not going anywhere."