Not sure if I am going to keep running with how season 12 went. At this time, that's not the direction I think I see this going, but sometimes when I write, it just finds its own path.
*I forgot to mention the song Emily sang in the last chapter is Cue the Rain by Lea Michele
Thank you for the comments! Xoxox!
(xxxxx)
Emily looked at her watch. It was nearly midnight her time. She still hadn't heard from Spencer that day. She'd check in with him every day since he'd been gone. He was very distressed about what to do for his Mom. She thought about their last conversation.
"How is she doing today?"
"Not well. She's been very confused and aggressive. When the nurse came in to give her medicine, she threw the pills across the room saying the government was trying to control her," Spencer said sadly.
"Oh, Spence. I'm sorry. What are you going to do?"
"I don't know. I don't know. It's like being 18 all over again."
"I know this is hard for you, but you are strong and so is your Mom. You will figure something out."
She picked up her phone and tried calling him, but as it had all day, it went straight to voicemail. She decided that it was time to go to bed. She would try again tomorrow.
(xxxxx)
Emily walked into the office that morning exhausted. She was up all night worrying about Spencer. Sometimes she had this overwhelming feeling that she did the wrong thing breaking up with him and taking this job. Why did she always put her career over everything else? He needed her and she abandoned him.
She opened her office door and let out a small, startled yelp. Standing near her desk was Spencer. She rushed toward him and threw her arms around his neck. She fit perfectly in his arms. They held each other tightly and much longer than they should have, but neither wanted to let go.
"I was worried about you," she said softly.
"I'm sorry, things got a little crazy with Mom," he replied still holding her.
Emily finally broke the hug and stepped back.
"How is she? How are you?" she asked.
"She's alright. She's waiting in the conference room," he said sheepishly.
"She's with you?" Emily said stunned.
Spencer nodded and looked down at his feet.
"What happened to Houston? The trial?" Emily said with concern.
"She was getting the placebo. I can't just let her … I can't leave her in that place … knowing she'll never have a chance at getting better," he said choking up.
Emily took a deep breath.
"Ok, so what are you going to do? Can she go back to Bennington?"
"Probably," he replied.
"But?"
"But, I don't want to take her back there either," he said. Emily didn't know what more to say, so she looked at him with questioning eyes. "I am going to have her stay with me. This way I can keep an eye on her and make sure she is being treated with the best care."
"Oh Spencer, that is a big undertaking," Emily frowned.
"You don't think I know that?" he snipped.
"I didn't say that. I just … I think what you are doing is incredibly honorable of you. You've always had a huge heart and your mother is lucky to have you as her son. That being said, I don't think you are equipped to handle her full time while working here," Emily said.
"I won't do it alone. I'll have a caregiver who can stay with her while I'm at work or away on cases," he said as if that solved everything.
"Spencer, you have already moved your Mom once. Now you have moved her again. To a place where she'll be alone most of the day. This is going to be extremely stressful for her," she said.
"She'll be fine. She'll see me more and I make her happy," he defended.
"Of course, you make her happy, but at what cost to you and your health? This job is demanding as it is and now you're taking this on your shoulders as well," she said.
"Emily, I appreciate your concern, but I'm not changing my mind. My Mother is staying with me. I came in to let you know I need a few more days to get a caretaker and then I will be back to work," he said.
Emily could see that he was angry with her and she didn't want him to leave angry with her. She walked closer to him and reached out to grab his hand. He flinched as if he was going to pull away, but allowed her to clutch his hand.
"If this is what you want, then I support you one hundred percent. I will help you in any way I can and I'm sure the rest of the team would feel the same," she said.
He looked down at their hands and a small smile reached his face.
"Thank you," he whispered.
(xxxxx)
"Mom, stop! It's just soup!" Spencer hollered.
"It smells funny! I think it has cyanide in it," Diana said as she dumped the bowl of soup into the sink. "The delivery guy did it. I could see it in his eyes."
"Mom, the delivery guy didn't do anything and you can't smell cyanide. It's just soup, I'm eating it and I'm fine," he said as he tried to take the container from her hand.
Diana and Spencer struggled with the container until it fell to the floor.
"Great," he sighed.
"You'll thank me someday," Diana replied before walking off to the bedroom.
Spencer frowned as he watched her walk away. He grabbed a handful of paper towels and cleaned up the floor, when there was a knock at the door. He walked over to the door and opened it to find Emily holding a bag.
"Emily? Hi. What are you doing here?" he asked surprised.
"I thought Diana might want a few things to help her settle in," she said holding the bag out for him.
Spencer took it and gave her a grateful smile. He stepped aside to let her in.
"Oh, I'm interrupting your dinner. I can come by another time," she said noticing the Chinese take-out all over the table.
"No, it's alright. Mom isn't hungry. Do you want some? There's more than enough," he offered.
"I don't want to impose –" Emily began.
"You aren't imposing. Please stay. I could use the company," he admitted.
"Ok, then," Emily said as she walked over to the table to sit down.
Spencer handed her a container and a fork. The two sat in a comfortable silence eating, when the door opened to Spencer's bedroom.
"Who are you?" Diana said to Emily from the doorway.
Emily jumped up from her chair.
"Mom, this is my Unit Chief, Emily. You've met her before," Spencer said before Emily could respond.
Diana eyed her suspiciously.
"Unit Chief? What does that mean? Are you his boss?" she asked.
Emily smiled. "Basically, yes. I just direct the team. It's a pleasure to see you again."
"I don't remember you," Diana said.
"Mom," Spencer scolded.
"Spence, it's alright," Emily whispered to him.
Spencer gave her an apologetic smile before he grabbed the bag Emily gave him. He carried it over to Diana and handed it to her.
"Mom, Emily brought some things over for you. She thought it might help you settle in," Spencer said.
Diana looked from Spencer to Emily before peering into the bag. She pulled out a book and looked over the cover. She put it back and took out another book. She went through the bag one item at a time. Spencer watched her nervously.
"How did you know I liked these authors?" Diana asked with her arms crossed.
"Brilliant minds love brilliant authors. So, I did a little research and found these to be some of the greatest Renaissance authors," Emily said smiling at Diana.
Diana looked at Spencer and then back at Emily.
"Well, you must care a lot about my son to go through the trouble of trying to win over his Mother," she said.
"Oh, no –"
"Mom, we're – no."
They both started talking at once.
"I am a Paranoid Schizophrenic who is slowly losing her memory, but I'm not stupid. I can clearly see two people in love. So, don't insult my intelligence and pretend otherwise," Diana stated before grabbing the bag and walking toward the bedroom. "The only people you are fooling are yourselves."
With that she shut the door leaving Emily and Spencer alone in an awkward silence. Spencer shuffled his feet, slowly kicking up and releasing the corner of the decorative carpet that laid in his living room. Emily glanced at him. He looked up at her and bit his bottom lip nervously.
"She's right," Emily said softly. "We are only fooling ourselves."
"Everyone knows?" Spencer asked, looking almost panicked.
"No, I just mean, the fact that we both think we can just move on. Like our love meant nothing," she said frowning.
"It didn't mean nothing, Emily. It doesn't mean nothing. It means everything to me," Spencer said earnestly.
"That's my point Spencer. I am kidding myself if I think I can just let you go because of a job. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and it's been a huge part of my life, but the thought of losing you … it's not worth it," she said.
Spencer was stunned by her admission. He ran a hand across his mouth and jaw. He stepped closer to her.
"Emily, I love you more than words can even express, but you can't give up this job for me. You may think that's the right decision now, but in time you'll regret it and you'll resent me," he said with sadness in his eyes.
"No, I won't Spencer. The only thing I regret is allowing this job to get in the way of happiness. I've always picked everything else over me and I've always felt lost. My entire life I've spent searching for my place in this world and I thought the BAU was the answer, but I realized it had nothing to do with the job.
I never realized how at home I felt when I was with you, until you were gone. All those feelings of being lost and needing to find my way came rushing back. Spencer, you are my home. Without you I'm just that scared little girl searching for answers. Searching for where I belong. This is where I belong. With you," she said as tears filled her eyes.
Spencer stepped toward her and pulled her into his arms. He held her tightly and kissed the top of her head. He could feel her clutching the back of his shirt tightly as if she was afraid he would disappear.
"So, what do we do? The second this comes out, one of us has to leave," he said, still holding her close to his chest.
"I know. Right now, I don't want to think about that. I just want you to hold me. We can figure out the rest later," she said listening to his steady heartbeat.
Spencer shuffled the two of them over to the couch, where he sat down and she snuggled against his chest. They held each other tightly until they fell asleep clutching desperately at one another.
The bedroom door slowly opened. Diana stuck her head out and smiled. She walked over and picked an afghan off the nearby chair. She draped it over the two sleeping lovers. She smiled as she looked at them.
"I won't remember either of you soon, but I'll be at peace knowing you will take good care of my baby," she whispered before walking back off to her room.