As If Love Were Enough

by alz3

Futuristic Fic. Two years after graduation, a very determined Santana is following her dreams of becoming a singer, while Quinn Fabray is exploring her new life in NY and all that comes with it. What will happen when they finally bump into each other? Lots of fluff, and M rated goodness in later chapters.

11. Till I Can Hold You In My Arms

S's POV

Have you ever felt like the air has been knocked right out of your lungs? As if an amazing day has suddenly turned for the worst, kind of like that awful feeling you get when you are in the drive thru and someone starts taking your order but you haven't decided yet. That awkward feeling of, of… I can't seem to grasp the word.

Nevertheless, that's what was happening to me. It is not something that easy to explain as anyone can obviously see; in all honesty, it is kind of a bitch to deal with. If it was easy, if that was the case, I would not be rambling right now. Before any of this, I didn't even know I could ramble. Feelings are just horrible to deal with, even the good ones and because I generally perceive them that way, this one has been just off the charts annoying. This one showed up when you least expected it did not it would fail to represent its name and definition. Good ol' fashion UNCERTAINTY. That's what I was experiencing when Q's number popped up on my cell phone's screen not more than five minutes before dinner was due.

A million thoughts raced through my mind, was she already at the door? If she was, I was totally screwed. More than screwed actually, I hadn't even gotten dressed yet. Now I was wearing a big ass baggy shirt I usually wore before I had to get ready for a date or do chores. Sure I only had to run to the room and get on with it since I had already done my make up but still, I wasn't planning to let Q let herself in, and much less to make her wait while I finished getting dressed. My Mom used to nag me all the time precisely cause of this, cause of how much time I usually took to get ready. She would say that if we had made plans or I was going somewhere with someone, I should not make said person is waiting.

"Si te van a dar pon, esta lista media hora antes, así si pasa cualquier cosa y llegan antes, no tienes que pasar malos ratos."

If someone's giving you a ride, be ready about half an hour earlier, that way if something happens, you won't have to find yourself in an uncomfortable situation that will probably ruin your mood.

Damn her and her wise comments… or should I say damn me for not listening to them when I should have the most. Like I said before, there were a million thoughts banging my head but then… then I got to one of the bad ones. What if Q was not calling because she was at the door, what if that was actually the furthest reality. What if she was calling to cancel because something had happened, was she okay? Worse, what if she was calling because she WANTED to cancel, maybe she had found something better to do.

Sure, like that could happen, you are a Lopez, you know how to get a party going, and you know how to show people a good time. However, what you should be worrying about is how ridiculous it is for you to think it's worse that she wanted to cancel on you, instead of the fact that something bad could have happened to her. Shit, you need to get your priorities checked. In addition, to make things a little more insane I was now having ongoing conversations with myself. No, no, wait. Q had just hung up while you were still busy rambling to yourself, AGAIN. In addition, she hung up cause of it, tough luck Santana, tough luck.

I dialed her number back. It rang, and it rang and it ra-

"S! Oh my Gosh, I am so sorry!" That didn't sound good. What was she sorry about? She wasn't coming; something in my gut was telling me so.

"Sorry about what Q?"

"About dinner? Uh, Oh, crap… You forgot. Ah, um, uh, it is okay. We can do this some other time, I wouldn't want to impose its fine, I'll ju-"

I didn't feel comfortable with all this awkwardness going on so I settled for teasing, teasing usually worked for me. "Hold up! What are you talking about Q? I do remember. We even texted about it a few hours ago, are you drunk already?" She was trying… trying to hold it in, but I could hear her laughing.

Once she could keep it together, she spoke again. "No, but I trust you will be, very soon. I got held up buying wine and then I bumped into a friend I'm not really that friendly with anymore and I wanted to fix something and, never mind. I just called to let you know I'll be there in about fifteen minutes." So now, she was the one rambling, interesting turn of events.

"Making me wait, I see how you're playing this."

"It's all about the teasing, not about the pleasing."

I laughed, and then realized what she was saying… wait. "What?"

"Uh, yeah, never mind, I just meant you know, the point is I'll be there in fifteen."

"With the whole vineyard, I suspect, if you meant that comment of getting me drunk, I mean that's what you'll need, I'm a tough one so it's either that or it just won't happen, aw too bad."

"Don't be so sure, I'm bringing something that will erase that cocky smirk I know you have on right now, so buckle up Lopez. Tonight we will see what you're made of."

"You do know I'm a bartender, so unless you're planning to drag me it won't work. I pretty much know every alcohol there is, even the ones that aren't legal in the United States."

"Just you wait Lopez, just wait."

"That's what they all say."

"And who's "all" compared to the legendary Quinn Fabray? That's right, there's just no comparison."

"Wanky."

"Either way I'll be there in about fifteen minutes or so to prove you wrong, get ready."

"That's cute; you actually think you have a shot at getting me drunk. See you in fifteen, Q."

"You'll see."

"Bye."

By now, I had thankfully finished cooking every bit of food I had in mind. I had actually gone out earlier and bought wine and other beverages for when. I was not planning to get Quinn drunk. I had seen her like that too many times now, and even though I loved being around her when her walls were down, even though I loved it to pieces, I didn't trust myself not to make a move while sober, I could only imagine what I'd be capable of doing drunk.

Although I do have decency, and my ego is painfully present even when I am drunk, but I didn't want to screw this up. I couldn't afford to screw it up; it was just out of the question. So I would either have to make sure neither of us would go overboard, nor contain myself as best I could considering the situation. Moreover, it already seemed a bit unrealistic because Quinn seemed set on the task of getting me drunk. Enough thinking, more doing.

I still needed to get dressed and set a few things but at least this bought me some time. I was having problems with how to set the table; I don't want it to look like the ones you see in romantic comedy movies, because after all, it wasn't a date. But, at the same time I wanted it to look like it was. These are the times when I wish we could control our feelings better than we actually do. It was frustrating, and if it was usually frustrating for normal people, it was even worse when it came down to me. I wasn't big on romantic gestures, I used to be at one point of my life, but that was long gone and since then I had stray away from anything related.

I had done a good job, it didn't need a lot of effort, most people didn't seem to get to me, none of them seemed good enough, not that they were bad to start with, actually yeah, most of them were. However, it wasn't until now that I had felt all those annoying left over feelings I had once felt. I didn't want them, I didn't need them, I had convinced myself pretty well of it, but she was sending all this progress to hell.

I started feeling anxious, I fucking hate all thinking I had done lately, I kept thinking having this dinner might not have been such a great idea after all. What if everything turned out for the worst, what if I ended up liking her more than I could handle and… nah, that wouldn't happen. She likes guys, and that was it. The problem was that I couldn't stop thinking about "what if". Those freaking "what ifs" could bring hope to even the coldest douche in the world. As I said before, uncertainty, that is as best I could describe whatever I was feeling.

Either way tonight will be fine. What else could happen? I'm having dinner with my best friend. If I could even call her that? We were basically strangers once again so I wasn't sure of anything.

I looked at the time, now the hard part –which should be the easiest- is to find the correct outfit for the non-date/date with my dear old friend. I normally looked hot in everything but I had to do something else. I wasn't sure of what I wanted to imply, but my level of hotness had to increase tonight, one way or another.

I walked towards the closet and pulled out some black long harem trousers, now the problem was what blouse I was going to wear with these pants. I tried to see which of them looked better on me, but for some reason all of them looked either as if I was ready to go to a ball or like I was getting the trash out on a Sunday. I opened one of my drawers and reached for a black tank top. Yes, this works. This style will definitely look hot but not extravagant enough to make it look like I'm ready for a date.

I placed everything on my bed and looked at the time once more and realized Quinn would be here in a few minutes. Shit! I checked my phone and noticed I had a text from her.

-San I know I'm close. But maybe I'm not so sure if I am or am not in front of the correct building.

I looked at the time she sent me the text. A minute ago. I couldn't help but to laugh before texting her back.

-I bet you're already drunk Fabray. Where are you? Tell me what's in front of you.

-I am not drunk… yet. I'm right in front of Luigi's Pasta.

-Okay Q, turn around and walk two blocks, you should see it then.

I left my phone on the bed unattended.

I made my way back to the bedroom and picked up my clothes; after I changed, I took one good look at the mirror and smiled. God bless the Latina blood that flowed through my veins. Most people, especially today, were insecure about their looks, I wasn't, and I guess because of it I didn't worry if I caught someones eye or not. I never really had to work too hard to get what I wanted, in the looks department at least, everything else was a different story.

I had worked my ass off since I could remember, and at least something good had to come my way, and my best guess was this, this which I saw in the mirror. People used to say I was a conceited brat cause of how smug I was, and I have to admit back then, I was a pain in the ass, but I've changed, not that much but it's something. I would always tell people that knowing you were attractive wasn't necessarily a bad thing, our culture made you think it was, but it wasn't. Many hated me for it, and so be it, as If I cared, I was proud, I still am, very much so, actually even more now. I just do not waste that much time being a bitch anymore.

If I handled tonight, as good as I looked I'd have this in the bag. However, what exactly would I have? Here we go again, a mental rodeo threatening to attack. This whole working the entire time thing had made me lose it. Thankfully, the low season was around the corner and because of it, I would not have to work as much anymore. I needed time off, ASAP. Saying I was excited was an understatement, I would finally have a damn chance to catch my breath, work on my lyrics and go to more singing classes.

After all that's what I was here for, I wasn't about to give that up, I was working hard, but I was saving most of my money, and so far it was looking good. I was proud of myself for making it this far by myself, my parents were proud, and in general, I felt good. I felt alive and ready to kick this dinner's ass. As in good, that is good, not bad, whatever.

Five minutes later, I had decided to move the small table to where the large glass wall was in my studio, through it you could see the whole city. Who could not love a view like that? Here was hoping she wasn't one of those people who didn't. However, I wasn't going to keep worrying, I had done more than enough. I invited her to dinner. That right there should have encouraged and shocking enough. I don't do these things; everyone knows it, so why do I keep repeating it? Maybe cause even though "I didn't do these things." Here I was, doing precisely that. Moreover, to make things even more entertaining the invitation had fallen from my lips faster than I could blink. I hadn't been in my right state of mind, and then again how could anyone be in their right minds when a girl like Quinn looked so, looked like that, so early in the morning. I did better than most would.

Quinn should be close by now. I pulled my hair back and let my locks hang freely. Everything was perfect, except for the part when I noticed I needed shoes. Shit, I don't think flats will work. I heard the doorbell ring, my heart was about to burst through my chest. Quinn was at the front door. I grabbed my red pump shoes and started to run towards the door, I was running and jumping all at once trying not to fall while putting my shoes on.

I stood in front of the closed door with one heel on my right foot and the other one in my hand. I put on the other heel fast and fixed my clothes once more, taking a deep breath before placing my hand on the doorknob.

I was shocked. When would her insane beauty stop surprising me? She has one of those long jackets you see in spy movies, with the exception that this one was black instead of the usual beige color, and she was carrying a bottle of wine. I closed my mouth and made a hand gesture letting her know she could come in. I'm tired of this… This "not being able to understand what's happening in my stomach every time I see Quinn Fabray thing" is getting very out of hand.

"Hey, Q! Come in. Let me help you with that."

She's staring at me. This would be a very different story if this was any other woman at my doorstep. I took the wine; she took off her jacket and handed it to me. If I thought, she looked beautiful with nothing but a simple yet elegant jacket I was wrong. Underneath it, she had a stunning white shirt with black sleeves, low waist black skinny jeans and flats.

This is going to be the end of Santana Lopez. She hasn't said a single word; she's just smiling and nodding. Can't help but wonder what she's thinking. She moved forward and opened her arms. Within seconds, she was hugging me and before I realized what I was doing, my arms were wrapped around her, tightly.

She smiled. "I need to thank you for not looking like this in high school Santana." She cleared her throat before she continued. "I certainly would've had a lot of issues being popular then. Not like I didn't have it going for me, but you're cute though." She teased and proceeded to place her bag on the counter.

"Oh, don't start Q; you always knew I was the hot one." I took a breath. "You're not that bad either though."

She arched her eyebrow, like if she was waiting for something else to come out.

"Okay Quinn, I mean Hot Fabray, are you hungry now or do you want to do something else?" She chuckled at my statement. Yes, I can get used to these types of interactions any day.

"I'm starving San; I think I might actually take the risk of eating your food."

"You'll love it, believe me. I'll probably even have to hide the rest of it." I gathered the food and placed it on the table that was now placed in front of the glass wall. I could see her looking through it. I was smiling, hard. She looked so beautiful; I felt this huge pull, as if I just wanted to be close to her.

"This is amazing San, it's so beautiful." She turned and looked at me. "Can I take a picture of it one day?"

"You can take it whenever you want Fabray." I smiled at her, moved to the table and placed our wine glasses. "Are you into photography? I mean if you want to take a picture you have a phone so…"

"Yeah." She blushed. "I love it, it's nothing professional though and more like a hobby, but it really entertains me. Calms me somehow, you know."

When I finished placing everything else, I served wine into our glasses and we sat. "Can I see your pictures one day?"

"If I survive this meal, be my guest." We laughed. "I hope this tastes good, it looks delicious San." She took a small bite making a face while she chewed and a low moan escaped her mouth.

My eyes went wide and I was trying hard not to think of what had just happened. "I hear apologies coming my way. I know how to cook. I'm Latina, its genetics."

"This is so good San. Mmm I had never tried mashed potatoes with bacon before."

"Are you serious? They're delicious, well if I make them, that is." I winked.

We kept eating and I could honestly notice she was enjoying the meal. After she was done, she looked out the window, grabbed her glass of wine, and drank a little. A smile instantly appeared on my face. How it is possible for someone to be so naturally cute? It was honestly beyond me. Instead of feeling giddy and content, I could not help but to feel jealous, jealous of the man who would marry her one day.

"Now that I'm certain I'm not going to die, I have to tell you something." She laughed. "I brought wine, but this is not going to get you drunk. We'll need like two cases."

"I was going to say something about this wine, but…"

She chuckled. "Lopez, there's nothing you can say to convince me that you're not going to get drunk."

"Are you trying to take advantage of the situation? Because let me tell you tha-

"I thought about it and then I remembered I'd be at your place, so it would prove to be a little difficult since I don't know where everything here is." She said wiggling her eyebrows. "I'll work on that when you're completely drunk."

I didn't know what to do or say, I felt like a mumbling blob. Quinn is so... Hot and different and-

She kept talking once I didn't say anything. "San this was delicious. Thanks! I loved it."

Her plate was empty. She was happy and for some reason I wasn't hungry anymore. I felt a tingling sensation, kind of like if a million ants were crawling on my skin.

"Any time." Was all I managed say.

"Let's play a game." She looked so alive, who was this girl, and where had she been all through High School? I stood and picked up our plates and placed them in the sink.

"Truth or Dare? I think we're too old to play that game Q."

She looked at me and rolled her eyes.

"No San and we can play whatever we want, we are young you know." She stood up and walked towards the counter filling our glasses with wine once again. "I just want to know you, what's been happening in your life and how much you have changed." She was looking at her shoes now.

"I like that okay, but why did you pour me more wine? Does one have to get undressed every time we lie?"

She burst out laughing. "San, if you need some time alone, I assure you I can go."

"Fabray I assure you, YOU need to stop the teasing."

I wanted to remember this version of her, forever. She opened her bag and pulled out something that looked like a jar. "You are going to like this S."

"Why? Cause you put some drugs in it?"

"I'm pretty sure Katy's boyfriend has some but no, there's nothing but good ol' alcohol here." She opened the jar and pulled out a strawberry. "This."

I was laughing hard. "God Q, you're going to get me drunk with strawberries?"

"Strawberries submerged in red berry Ciroc."

"Interesting Fabray, since when are you a vodka fan?" I was curious, very curious.

"I haven't tried it yet. I was waiting for a good occasion. Nevertheless, my Mom used to do this all the time back when… I'll explain some other time. The point is I was waiting for a good occasion."

"How long have they been dipped in vodka?"

"Three hours, I think."

"Bring it then, Blondie."

She smirked at me and moved forward with the jar in her hands, she looked out the glass staring at the building lights with a smile on her face once more.

"So where do I start S?"

"Truth or Dare, wasn't it?"

"So how are we playing this?" She opened the jar and grabbed a strawberry. The smell of vodka was strong. I could see the fruit dripping in alcohol. "Okay, so every time we refuse to do a dare or lie about anything we have to eat one."

"Not lame, Fabray, not lame." It was interesting how she was setting everything up. I have to admit I'm a little bit nervous. Not because I'm afraid to do one of her dares, if not cause of the things I was feeling, somewhere in my chest.

"Okay San, let's do this." I took the table out of the way and pushed a couch to where we were. I then sat and she followed. "Truth or Dare?" she smiled at me moving the fruit in her hand.

"Truth." Let's see how this goes first.

"Ah, looks like someone isn't afraid of vodka? I see." She cleared her throat and her eyebrow rose. "What do you usually do in your spare time?"

"Nothing too interesting, what do you do?"

"Uh uh, it's my turn to ask. You'll have yours, now answer as you should or these…" She said pointing to the jar filled with strawberries. "Will get gradually worse." She finished smirking in the process.

"Oh scary. Okay, I usually lay back, I don't really go out because you know working at a bar and Starbucks the constantly socializing gets out of hand. So I like to be by myself or go to a small get together, nothing too loud."

"See, you said oh scary, yet you answered. I still feel like you're not giving me the full story though."

I giggled. "Nothing much, just here."

Her brows furrowed. "You can't just be here and do nothing; there must be something you do to make time pass." She said placing a soaked strawberry in her mouth.

Shit. What was she trying to do? It wasn't even her turn to eat one. "Well I write, not stories or anything like that, but the lyrics, I write lyrics." I finished throwing my hands up in defeat.

"Mmm these actually taste amazing. Nevertheless, these are not half as amazing as the fact that Santana Lopez writes? And lyrics? Oh this was definitely the best game we could have ever played."

"Yeah, you can ask more questions once it's your turn again, but it's not so tough luck Blondie."

She pouted and God forbid if it was the most precious thing I had seen in my entire life, but then she spoke proving me wrong once again. "I see we're making a habit of the nickname." She said biting on her lip absently.

How could anyone go from cute, to insanely sexy in such a short spam of time? It was unbearable, no, no. What it should have been was illegal, it should have been illegal.

"Not if you're going to be a baby about it." Before I knew it, she smacked my arm.

"You deserved that, and its okay, I see how we're playing this." Oh no, that smirk, I remember that smirk, she would have that face whenever she was developing a devious plan. It could be worse it could be good, either way it was nerve wracking, even to me, so I swallowed, hard and changed the topic.

I shifted in the seat and spoke. "Okay um, it's my turn right?"

"Aren't we forgetting something?"

"No…"

"Yes we are, you didn't eat your strawberry." She said motioning to the new one, she had picked after she finished the other one.

"Oh no, you're not getting me with that one. Weren't we supposed to eat one if we refused to do a dare?"

"Aw, who's the baby now? It would seem that either someone's getting cold feet or that I didn't explain myself very well." She said looking at me defiantly.

"Explain yourself again because I smell a trap, and Santana Lopez does not get played, I'm sorry it just doesn't happen."

"Oh really now, okay. Well the point of the game was that if you don't choose a dare or refuse to do one then you have to eat a strawberry, so basically the only way you get out of not eating a strawberry it's if you do a dare." Was her eyebrow always arched or was it just something she did a lot now?

I took the strawberry from her hands and said. "So basically I can't win. Or better said, basically you won't win since I have an outstanding alcohol resistance."

"Nothing to worry about then, if you're so sure about yourself… that is." There we go again; I swear her eyebrow was always arched. I could do nothing but laugh, Quinn was just some other thing.

"Okay so it's my turn then, what does the dopey blonde at the end of the couch wants truth or dare?"

"I do not appreciate these nicknames you're providing, and I am not dopey… yet."

"Sure sure, I'll stick to first and last names for now."

She looked lost in her thoughts and then something changed and she answered. "As that proverb says if there's a wuss in the room, act as a wuss as well, so I'll take truth cause I won't give you the pleasure of daring me."

I had not really caught what she was saying; I was too deep in my thoughts when a decent question popped in my mind.

"Oh no… what are you going to ask? I know that smile Lopez, I'm a sweet human being, don't be too rough!"

"What face?" I knew exactly what a devious smile she meant but it wouldn't kill me to play dumb for a while.

"Oh, um." She cleared her throat and shifted a bit closer by accident. "You know…"

"I hear lots of talking, not enough doing. Hmm, let's see… How about this? What's something freaky, no one knows you do or can do?"

"Freaky? What type of freaky?" She was the epitome of nervousness.

I teased. "Oh so there's types now… okay well didn't know you were so diverse, like Wanky freaky then. Something no one would expect from a good ol' daddy's girl."

She huffed. "I'm going to kill you, you know."

"You know how this works, if you don't tell me then that mean the dosage of sweet strawberries goes up, by a lot."

"I am not saying."

"Oh you just gave yourself away, there is something, I see. Just so you know I will find out."

"I know, there's not anything. Whatever give me those strawberries."

"Here you go, two for you, if you refuse to answer another the amount goes up by one."

She glared at me and took the first strawberry, she ate it without giving it a lot of thought but then just when she was about to eat the other one something outside the glass wall caught her attention, and I started seeing it all unfold before me. It looked as if she had lost herself in thought, but that wasn't something I couldn't handle, I would've handled it just fine if it hadn't been for the fact that she was playing with the strawberry while she got lost in her thoughts. She would move the strawberry from side to side a little and then bite it a bit too slow to be considered a normal pace. It was driving me insane, and I was sure it was noticeable, the room felt hot, I felt hot, everything around us could have burned up but I didn't really care. I couldn't find a way of detaching myself from the view I had before me, and God did I wish I was talking about the view outside the glass wall, but no, I wasn't. I was blatantly staring at Quinn eating a strawberry, I never thought seeing someone eating a strawberry could make me feel like everything was burning up inside. I needed water, I needed to cool off somehow but I couldn't move.

Then like a heavenly call from above the phone rung. She jumped up in surprise and I followed knocking out a few napkins I had stacked next to the table I had pushed.

I bent down and started picking up everything. "Shit, can you answer the phone while I fix this?"

"I don't know, I mean it could be… uh someone, I do-

"Who could it be? Never mind please do me this favor besides couldn't the legendary Quinn Fabray handle pretty much anything that was thrown her way?" I said mimicking her when she wiggled her eyebrows earlier.

"Sure, pull that one now. You'll pay for it when I get back."

"Mhm."

And off she went, I started gathering the things I had knocked over and taking deep breaths getting ready for whatever happened when she came back. In the distance, I could hear her mumbling a few things and then a little bit of laughter. She was laughing? Who was she talking to? Great, I'm at my apartment and Quinn is answering my phone, and I don't know who it is and shit, maybe sending her to answer the phone wasn't a good idea.

Before I knew it, she came back, a weird smile plastered on her face.

I couldn't help myself so I asked. "What was that about?"

"Jealous are we? It would appear so that I get along much better with people who are around you often."

"Psst, please. I'm a joy to be around."

"You can say that again." She said smoothing her shirt.

"You never answered."

"I did not. Seems you're right."

"Fine, I won't beg, but this is my apartment, I will find out once you leave."

"Throwing me out, no chances of sleepovers? I see you don't want to wake up next to this."

"What, no you can stay over if you want; I just meant I'll find out either way."

She bit her lip and played with her feet a little before she looked up and started speaking once more.

"It was Puck."

Oh no. This was not happening, not after that awkward Maury type conversation we had this afternoon on the golf court. When I told him Q was in town and that she actually lived here, he looked like if I had just told him he wasn't the baby daddy and he actually wanted the baby. Jesus, what had his huge ego -which was the only huge thing he had I must add- stomped on this time. Then again, I really needed to get my shit together, Quinn was not my girlfriend, she did not even play for my team, Puck was available, he always was and sadly, it was the circle of life. I should have seen it coming, I should have listened to my wise mama, but no, I wanted to get messy.

I was mad, a thousand thoughts roamed my brain, but I had to say something so I pulled myself together and spoke. "And?"

"He seemed kind of really happy to talk to me, which was a bit weird… considering, you know."

"Yeah, that's Puck for you. He's charming like that." I wanted to sound like I was okay with all of it, but I wasn't and because of it, I sounded as annoyed as I felt. Thankfully, she either didn't notice or decided to ignore it.

"Charming? Well that's a word I thought I'd never hear you using when describing him."

"We all change, or so I've been told." I was trying to keep the words that came out of my mouth short, if I didn't something awful would come stumbling down and I was not in the mood for it.

"I guess, anyway he invited me, we actually, to a Halloween party. His Halloween party apparently? I see that hasn't changed." She finished trying to find my gaze.

"Yes, his annual Pucksaurus Halloween Smash Ball as he calls it." There was silence, nothing but extremely loud silence. How can silence be so loud you may ask, well I was sure we were both painfully aware of just how quiet it had gotten so how could that not be loud. Anyway, I brushed it off and continued. "You should go. It's fun."

"I don't really feel like going, unless I'm going with someone... That is."

"Last time I checked Puck was available, you can always ask him. I'm sure he would just LOVE that." I was annoyed to say the least.

She walked to where the couch was, picked up the jar full of strawberries and ate another one.

"I don't feel comfortable with that, plus he must have a thousand girls on the waiting list already."

"He'd make an exception for you."

"I don't want him to get the wrong idea, is what I meant then. I would actually want someone totally different to go with me."

"Then ask that person and go."

She stood there with her mouth open, I knew she was at a loss for words but I didn't know just what about. Who in their right minds would turn down Quinn? A jackass, that's who. Maybe it was Puck after all.

"I… can we keep playing?" She asked blushing furiously.

What in the hell was going on, I was about to get a whip splash from all the stupid mood swings everyone was getting lately. I settled and answered. "Sure thing."

We sat down and after a while, the tension was almost gone completely. We were laughing and to be honest I was feeling kind of dopey myself by now, not as much as her, but I was definitely being buzzed and was failing miserably at hiding it.

"My turn." She hummed. "Let's continue with a simple one, okay?"

I nodded and she looked straight at my eyes. I was getting used to this constant glancing at each other. I was getting used to her.

"Why New York?" she blurted out.

"Great Q, you just want me drunk."

She laughed. "I warned you San, I'm going to prove that you are not as bad ass as everyone seems to think."

I rolled my eyes at her. "Well it's easy. Lima was quiet and boring. New York seems like a good option for a woman like me." She nodded. "Besides, New York is full of dreamers, maybe one day I'll reach mine. And if not at least I tried."

"Wow, Santana Shakespeare Lopez!" She said clapping.

"Shut it Quinn!" I said slapping her arm playfully.

"Make me."

I looked at her arching an eyebrow. What was that supposed to mean? She did nothing but stare at me and I couldn't help but to look at her lips. I closed my eyes and laughed.

She gave me the strawberry and I took a bite. I had already eaten a few but damn it, they were delicious. The vodka flavor was so strong but combined with the sweetness of the fruit, it was like heaven on earth.

"Shit Q, this tastes good."

"Really, you like it too? I know I did but you hadn't said anything so I wasn't too sure."

"Yeah, it tastes great, your turn."

"Truth, I pick truth."

"Okay don't get me wrong, I like it... But, why aren't you as guarded anymore?"

She laughed. "And by guards you mean a bitch, its okay you can say it, remember I'm not as guarded anymore I won't bite." She finished with a wink.

"Not really, I mean you were a bitch, but so was I, that's something we can't really prevent it's just who we are. But what I'm talking about is how different you seem now, I'd say carefree but that's not the right word, it's almost like, like you're happy for the first time."

"I am."

"You're what?"

"I am happy for the first time." She finished, a dopey smile taking over her features.

"For the first time though?"

"I mean it's not like I haven't been happy before, but it is the first time I don't feel pressured. I mean I do but not like before. I used to have a reputation to keep up, parents to please, friends who weren't really friends, no offense. People who I didn't even know looking up to me, it felt like a lot to handle so I didn't feel happy."

"It was a lot."

"What was?" She said tilting her head to the side.

"What you dealt with."

"Well you dealt with the same things and you still managed to look somewhat happy when you weren't yelling in Spanish that was."

"Ha, very funny. I managed, besides even though my parents weren't a walk to the park they didn't really pressure me into anything, they were and are pretty accepting still so I never had those problems you did."

"Still I would've handled it better, I guess."

"You need to give yourself a break. You could only do so much; we were teenagers for Gods sake, what they expected from us."

She shot me a huge smile. "I guess you're right, you're not so bad after all Lopez."

"You're not so bad yourself Fabray, now eat your strawberries."

"Strawberries as in plural? Why are we talking in plural, I answered it, I'm suppose to get one."

"So you're a wuss, okay."

She opened her mouth and her arms shot up indignantly. "Am not!" Before I could say anything, she had grabbed four strawberries and said: "But if you're going to make demands, then so will I, you need to eat these two and I'll eat these two."

"You don't see me whining."

She huffed and shoves one in her mouth. A few minutes later, we kept exchanging truths and dares and by then I was feeling a lot woozier than I had originally planned.

"You seem a bit flustered S." She said poking my nose.

"What, no way, those strawberries haven't done a thing to me, you're crazy."

"If you say so, now dare me, come on, dare me." She said in a sing-song tone.

"You on the other hand are definitely buzzing but whatever lets me think of a good dare." I scrunched my nose, coming up with dares was a lot harder than I originally thought.

"I'm getting old here Lopez, throw the best you got my way little missy."

"Okay, but you're not going to like it."

"Pish posh, tell me, I'll do it cause Quinn Fabray says yes to everything, except tap dancing I'm just not to fond of that."

I burst out laughing, God she was ridiculously cute.

"I dare you to tell me what freaky thing you do."

Her eyes went wide and she stood up so quickly my intoxicated brain could not even register the action.

"Oh you're sneaky, I like that… I respect that." She said, shifting closer.

"You best do, Blondie."

"Well if you must know, I've been told my dancing skills are pretty rad."

"Oh come on, that's not freaky, we all know your dancing skills are pretty good, that doesn't necessarily make it fair-

"Lap dancing Lopez, I mean lap dancing."

She motioned for me to come closer and for the first time in my life, I gulped.

"Yeah, I've been told I have the right skills to pull off a great lap dance. I have never really tried it per se, but I've been told several times so here's to taking their word for it."

"And who exactly told you that?" I was amazed I could manage to get the words out. She was so close to me, I could feel her breath or was that the alcohol? I wasn't sure but suddenly everything smelled like strawberries with a dash off… of pure unadulterated sex. Shit, snap out of it!

"Wouldn't you like to know?" She said drinking a bit of wine from the glass.

"That's why I asked." I said trying hard not to bite my lip but failing miserably at it. I needed to get all this built up frustration out somehow, and biting my lip seemed like a good option. That was until I saw her looking at my… was she looking at my lips? Oh shit, something told me I wouldn't make it out alive of here tonight. She started leaning in, and I was sure I looked composed outside, but inside, I was freaking the fucking out. She looked a bit nervous, but considering what she was leaning in for, who wouldn't be? She licked her lips and smirked.

My mouth hung open and that is when she averted her sight and wrapped her arms around my waist and positioned her face on the crook of my neck instead. What in the name of God had happened? I was sure she was leaning in for a kiss, but then she suddenly stopped and went in for a hug instead. Oh yeah, I know what happened. She's straight, she's drunk and this is what happens, people get freaky but instead of getting freaky all the way she decided against it, cause that's Quinn, she probably thought of what she was really doing and made a better judgment.

We lay there for a long, long time. And just when I was about to ask her if she had fallen asleep she spoke.

"S, will you go to Puck's with me?" I could feel her breath on my neck, this was driving me insane.

"What? Now? He must be out partying or sleeping, it can wait, we can go there some other time."

She was giggling, why was she giggling?

"No, I mean like for the party, I don't want to go to his house, what made you think I wanted to go to his house? You're insane and drunk, definitely drunk." She said pulling me in a bit tighter.

"Oh." Was all I could say.

"Oh as in you'll go with me, or oh as in I already have a thousand of girls who I plan to score and won't have time to spend time with the infamous Quinn Fabray?"

"Oh as in I didn't think you'd want to go with me, don't you have a million of guys who would want to go with you to a thing like this?" I was honestly surprised, why would she ask me to go with her, it was so not like her.

She mumbled something but I couldn't hear it, you know her mouth being in the crook of my neck still. Jesus!

"What was that Fabray?"

She lifted her face a little bit, making me miss her warmth instantly and said. "Are you calling me easy Lopez? Because if you are I must retract my invitation." She laid her head back once more and the coldness went away as fast as it had come.

"You? Easy? Please, I wouldn't be surprised if you'd remained untouched utill marriage."

"Who says I haven't lost the big V –card already? Miss know it all."

"I mean it's a possibility, it's not like there wouldn't be any suitors, it's just I doubt you would for some reason." I finished letting out a breath.

"I guess you'll have to find out in some other game of truth or dare then."

"I guess I will then, to both things."

"Both things?" I could feel her nose scrunch up.

I laughed. "The party and finding out I mean, not necessarily in that order."

"Whoa there, you have to buy me dinner first."

"I seem to be confused, isn't that what this was? Oops, let me cancel the mariachis then."

"You ass." Was all I was able to hear.

"I'm an ass? I made dinner, you're the ass." I said trying to look at her as best I could when I noticed I was playing with her hair, when had I started playing with her hair? This girl made me do things I wasn't even aware of.

"True, but even though this was pretty magical I do know that if Santana want's to romance a girl, like the date type of thing she goes over the top, cause that's how she does things. It's either all or nothing with her."

"Why are you referring to me in third person and even more frightening who is this romantic Santana you are speaking of? I don't seem to recall these romantic events ever happening."

She let out a giggle and after some time passed, she spoke again. "I missed you."

"Oh so you don't miss me anymore, I see."

She slapped my arm and huffed. "Be as cocky as you want San but I know you missed me too, otherwise you wouldn't have invited me to dinner."

"Maybe I was bored."

She started drawing with light circles on my back with her fingers."Maybe you're bad at making up excuses."

"Maybe… I wanted to spend time with you."

That's right, I said it. She moved a little grabbing the now almost empty jar. She opened it and grabbed a strawberry. What is she doing?

"That seems pretty true to me. Here you go; you get to evade a dare." She placed the fruit in front of my mouth. She kept her face buried deep on my neck and started to press the fruit on my lips.

"What are you doing?" I mumbled.

"You have to eat one San."

Her fingers grazed my lips and I took a bite of the strawberry. Her fingers were filled with the strong substance. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I swallowed the fruit and once I had finished, her fingers weren't on my lips anymore. I looked her way while she ate the rest of the strawberries and licked her lips.

"San, do you have tape?"

I laughed.

"Why do you need tape Q? Are you ready to start your plan of taking over this place? Because let me tell you I'm not drunk. At all."

"San tell me where is the tape and stop being such a coward."

"Nobody calls me a coward, Quinn."

"Well get your fine ass up and get me that tape."

"If you release your hands from my body."

She laughed. "Right. No, don't move tell me where it is. I'll get it."

I wasn't sure what this woman was doing but whatever, I was going to find out eventually.

"Third drawer in the kitchen to your right."

She stood and started to walk towards the kitchen, stumbling a bit on her way. She opened one of the drawers.

"San there's just forks here, and spoons." She shouted.

She's an adorable drunk. "Fabdrunk that's your left."

"Let's see who is the drunk one in a minute, Lopez."

I was curious. She had duck tape in her hands and my mind started to run by itself. Was she going to tape my hands and legs to the chair? Shit, what am I even thinking? Of course not! Instead, she pulled some tape out and placed it on the floor, right in front of me. What the hell?

"Get up and walk a straight line Lopez."

"Who do you think you are? Officer Fabray?"

"Don't make me arrest you then, San."

I laughed; she was trying hard to stay serious, which made everything just that much more hilarious.

"I got nothing to hide officer."

I stood and once I did, everything felt like it was spinning, I felt a little dizzy to say the least. The lights in front of me blurred for like three seconds before it all went back to normal. She was laughing so hard. This could not be happening. How many strawberries did I eat?

"Check this out Officer." I tried to move my legs as normal as possible, but my heels were not helping at all.

"Miss, you are not even in the line." She was covering her mouth with both hands, trying to muffle the laughter.

I took my heels off and started to walk on the line. This was embarrassing, how the mighty have fallen.

Suddenly I heard a shutter. No freaking way.

"What do you think you're doing Fabray?"

"Remembering the glorious moment when Santana Lopez lost against me. You are drunk."

"Give me that right now."

I started running after her. I was blinking fast. I was not allowed to fall. That would have been the end of me. Dignity, I had to keep my dignity intact.

She stepped behind the island in the kitchen and started to do I don't know what's on her phone.

"Fabray! You better delete that photo now." I tried to sound normal, but it came out sounding like a scowl.

"It's Officer Fabray for you Missy." She said laughing and pointing her phone at me.

In a swift moved I snatched her phone, and started searching for the picture.

"You won't find it San. I deleted the picture. After sending it to my email, of course." She was grinning.

I smirked, pressed the home button, and touched the small envelope in the corner of her phone.

"What are you doing?" She was almost yelling at me.

"Are you really that drunk Q?"

I looked at the phone screen once more and almost growled when I saw the "make a new account or add an email" thing on the screen.

"The answer is, NO!" She laughed and took her phone away. "I'm smart you know."

"No you're not." I couldn't help myself, I had to laugh.

"That's a lie Santana, you have to eat a strawberry."

"We're not even playing anymore Quinn."

"I am."

I walked towards her and grabbed one of the last strawberries from the jar. She seemed happy about it.

"Are you ready for more or do you just want to accept I won and get this over with?"

"There's nothing you can do about it Q, I'm not drunk."

She rolled her eyes pointing at the jar and said. "Let's make a deal. I will eat these two and you eat the rest okay?"

"Why?"

"Because I would like to see how you wake up in the morning when you're all hungover."

"So you're staying?"

She blushed. "Uh. No, I don't want to impose, I should go. Actually I need to go it's getting late."

"Lies, you want to stay. Eat one Quinn."

"I… that's. Okay." She grabbed two strawberries out of the jar and proceeded to eat them slowly.

"You can stay here if you want to. I wouldn't let you walk alone this late in New York anyway." She nodded and handed me the last strawberry. I chuckled and ate it quickly.

"Were you in love with Jessica?"

What the hell? Why was she asking me about her. How had she even remembered her name?

"Um, no I wasn't Q."

"Should I make you do shots, liar?"

I shook my head. "She was a selfish bitch, a hot one with great lips but a selfish bitch nonetheless."

She arched an eyebrow. "Are you describing yourself four years ago?"

I grabbed one of my couch cushions and threw it at her.

"Ouch! That was not cool. When I become a Vet I will sedate a monkey and then when he's up, I'll throw him at you."

She is unbelievable. "What would a monkey do to me Dr. Fabray? I could probably give him a banana when he wakes up and become his best friend."

"Plot twist, the monkey will have rabies."

We both burst out laughing and fell flat on the couch. A few seconds passed and she started staring out the glass wall again. "So you weren't? You were not in love with her?" She had this particular grin plastered on her face. I could not decipher what it meant.

"Not at all, Quinn."

She nodded. "Good."

"Good?" I asked almost instantly, a hint of shock lingering in my voice.

"Yeah, I can't imagine us hanging out right now if she was still with you. If she really is like you describe her, your double and what not. She would be here right now sleeping and being all grumpy."

I laughed. "Yeah, you're right."

"Besides, then I would have to sedate two monkeys instead of one."

I laughed as if I had not in a long time. This Quinn Fabray was perfect in every single way, she was so lighthearted, and it almost felt as if I was meeting some other girl for the very first time. On the other hand, her past self was still very much there, but it would usually present itself through her snarky remarks, which made her interesting to say the least. Maybe if she had been like this in high school everything would have been easier for me… or that much harder.

"I see you have no objections."

"About what?"

"About, making one of my future wild animals attack your past lover."

"My ex being the very wild animal right?"

She snorted at that, and it took me back to those sleepovers we all used to have, that's when we would really let our walls down. At least half way down, that is when Q used to actually let her laugh/snort out. That was one of the easiest ways you could spot when she actually felt comfortable in your company.

"You can read minds then, I'm glad." She said smiling.

"Don't tell or there will be very bad consequences, speaking of, what time is it?"

"Mm, I don't know, but this couch is comfy, I don't want to move. No, correction I can't move."

"Please, you're just being lazy Blondie."

"Cannot move. Physically impossible."

I rolled my eyes and stood up, where had I left my cell phone? I checked in the living room, the kitchen, the table were we had dinner earlier, but there was nothing. Then I remembered I had left it on my bed. I went to look for it there, forgetting shortly that there were other clocks around the house. I picked it up and saw a few text messages, I would check them later. It was one thirty –two. Fuck, I really needed to go to sleep, tomorrow was one of my busy days. I worked at Starbucks and Azzardo, and to top that of I also had to attend singing class. This hadn't occurred to me when I first invited Quinn for dinner though, I guess I'll have to be a buzz kill for tonight, otherwise there won't be a living soul that will be able to handle me tomorrow.

"Hey Q, you tired yet?" She said something but I couldn't really catch it so I got closer. "I asked if you're tired yet?"

She mumbled a few things and after a while, I could actually understand something.

"Mm little bit." A hint of sleep in her voice.

"That little bit sounded like a lot."

"Maybe, but I don't want to be a party pooper."

"God Fabray, who says party pooper?"

"Oh yeah I'm a God alright. Wait, not a God, more like a goddess, yeah." She said with a goofy grin.

"Okay… that's our queue, let's go to bed. Well you can take the bed and I'll take the couch."

"NOOO. We can sleep in the same bed, like old times. It's fine." She tried to stand up but was struggling so I ran, a little wobbly myself, and helped her up.

"I could've stood up just fine by myself but thank you anyway Miss Lopez."

"Sure you could, that's why you're clutching my shirt." I teased.

"Shh, I ate more strawberries than you did, cut me some slack miss I'm a bartender and I know it all, and watch me flex my alcohol resistance pecks." She was trying to free her hands from my grasp so she could flex her muscles but decided against it after a while of struggling.

After a few minor trips and lots of laughter, we made it to the bed. She started talking about how many things she had to do tomorrow, something about going to class early and then having to work, there was a truck coming with new books? Honestly, I did not remember very well, my mind was fuzzy and I just wanted to go to sleep as soon as possible. Tomorrow would be a bitch.

She snuck in bed, wrapped herself in the covers and motioned for me to get in.

"I'm cold San, get in bed." She said pouting at the end.

"I'm coming." I said from the bathroom.

I heard some insane laughter and then nothing but pure silence.

"You asleep Q?"

Nothing.

Once I walked in, I saw her lying there peacefully asleep. I snuck in, pulled the covers and was trying to find a comfortable position when I felt a hand wrap itself around my waist.

"You're warm. Warm and comfy." She hummed.

Oh God, kill me now. Was Quinn really cuddling with me and telling me I was warm and comfy… I was so much more screwed than I thought. I needed help, I needed to snap out of it, but instead I found myself wrapping my arms around her waist and intertwining our legs.

"Goodnight Q." I whispered.

She said nothing. I was trying to fall asleep but my brain kept working itself. I seriously considered drinking some pills just so I could catch some sleep, tomorrow would not be easy. I picked up my phone very carefully trying not to wake up Q with any sudden movements, and set my alarm. She said she had to wake up early and so did I but I didn't know just how early she meant so I set it to half an hour earlier than I usually did and shifted a bit. For the next couple of minutes I did nothing but lay there and breathe.

Finally, after a while I started getting sleepy so I shifted once more and before I knew it, I was placing a warm kiss on her now cold forehead. I sighed not really knowing what to do with myself and slowly drifted to sleep with just one thought in my mind: What I'd do to fall asleep every night with her in my arms like this.