Ike's text had me in hysterics last night. I was basically thinking about it right up until I fell asleep. Ethan didn't find it as amusing as I, but he just didn't understand that's all. However, that was all last night. Last night verses now was very different. I was currently walking down the streets during this unholy time in the morning, with my eyes barely open, and my body not even awake yet. It was making me out to be more miserable then anything. It definitely wasn't funny anymore. Five forty five AM isn't exactly my cup of tea-coffee. Coffee.. Boy did that beverage sound good. Coffee is what I need. I didn't even have coffee today. I basically rolled out of bed and away from Ethan and I's cuddle fest to clumsily get ready to go. (Yes, we sleep in the same bed much like Henrietta and I. It's just normal now. And it's not our fault when we wake up snuggled together or spooning. We've just gotten so fucking used to it that it doesn't matter anymore.) I left the house like someone who just rose from the dead, and I had to exorcize self restraint and hope to not punch Ike in the face for no reason at all. I was moody. However I almost hoped he said something so stupid, that I had no choice but to give him a good punch in the face.
Then I found that the thought of punching Ike in the face, was the only thing to be motivating me at the moment. I really wanted to have a reason to hit him. I pushed myself along with that awesome thought, trudging down the cold streets in silent prayer that I'd get to hit Ike today. All he needs to do, is say something really stupid. Then I could just give him one good punch in the face, and it'd make my day. Please god let this be the day-this is fucking pathetic-I cut myself off. The realization wasn't hard to see, I was being silly. I was just grumpy and tired. I needed to wake up a bit, and maybe get out of this stupor. I tried to meagerly stretch my arms up over my head as I let out a long yawn. My body felt the strain, and it helped a bit. I gave a look around to try and notice my surroundings, the sun was on the mist of just barely rising. It was cascading a beautiful hue of red, pink, orange, and yellows across the sky. It's something people love to see, but I'm pretty indifferent to it. It was just the beginning of another day, and I was beginning it a lot earlier then I'd like to be. However contrary to my complaining, as I began to get closer and closer to my destination I started to forget about being tired. That wasn't the issue anymore. A new one was arising.
I really didn't want to see Ike. At all. Even yesterday when I was laughing about it, it still wasn't an enjoyable thought. Yet, I was swallowing my pride and doing the exact opposite. But the closer I was getting towards the school, I was finding myself with more and more regret. I should have just stayed asleep. Then continued my merry little life instead of doing this. And I had now gotten close enough that in the mist of the morning I seen someone standing there and leaning against a pole. It stopped me dead in my tracks. God.. That's definitely him. Just seeing him made the urge to turn tail and run almost become a reality, however I had already gotten this far. I really didn't want to deal with him. But running would be cowardly, I huffed a breath and fought my urge to leave. Fuck it. I took my stride towards him. It would be stupid of me to let him dominate the situation that I technically gotten us involved in.
So I'll just make this a game in my own mind. A game of awkward. I make him more awkward then I. That's it, I'll just make him out of place, rather then I. That's all I got to do. I gently played with the strap of my messenger bag as I got closer with every small step. When I arrived, regardless of my nerves, I spoke up first.
"Hey, loser." He didn't move, however I did hear him giggle to himself. Then I noticed the cord for his headphones, and it made me feel like the loser. So I stood there awkwardly deciding on whether to reach over and alert him of my arrival, or wait for him to notice.
"I wanna touch you, kiss you, freak you, fuck you, lick you, tease you, please you, suck you." The boy sang out rather happily. I honestly had no thoughts as the boy bobbed his head to the beat of his music. My mind went blank. "I wanna make you cum.." He whispered, the smile on his face never falling. His iPod in the palm of his hand as he tapped his finger to the beat. "I wanna-" My face was hot, I think I was embarrassed for him. I didn't want to hear anything else, so I interrupted him immediately by jabbing his arm. He jumped and snapped his gaze towards me as he pulled his headphones from his ears. "Oh, good morning." He squeaked in surprise, but broke from it pretty easily and offered me a smile, like I'd somehow didn't hear what he was just singing about. Was that all he listened to? Raunchy music about sex? This is the second time now.
"Uhm. Good morning. I guess." I muttered, it was underlined with attitude.
"Wow, didn't think you'd actually show." He explained as he was putting his music device into his backpack. I found myself regretting this the longer I stared at the younger boy, who to my dismay was winning in the height department. He was wearing a light blue track jacket, and some baggy black sweats that met with a pair of grey jogging shoes. He looked to me, and gave a soft laugh. "Are you really going to run in those jeans?" His right eyebrow arched in a small tease. I frowned in return. As if it wasn't hard enough to socialize with him, he has to go and make it awkwarder by playing like we were acquaintances.
"I don't care." I replied, it was pretty neutral of a response. He just rolled his eyes at me.
"Alright then, I've already warmed up, so lets get going." He gave me a genuine smile. The pep this guy had so early in the morning made me uncomfortable. He began walking in a direction that I realized was the road. "Are you ready?" He questioned. I was slightly wondering what that was supposed to mean?
"Uhhh, yeah." I replied with passive aggressive sarcasm, acting like that was the stupidest thing I'd heard. It's not like my fucking leg was injured or something. He sighed. But he set the rhythm, it was steady and rather slow. I felt like he was taking it easy on me. To be honest it was slightly offensive. I was instantly irritated.
However it was like he picked up on my irritation without even giving a look in my direction, he piped up "I don't want to ruin my energy to early, so I'm going to take it slow."
"Do you get tired easily?"
"Have you ever went jogging before?" He questioned with sass. I frowned, the truth was no. I haven't. This was a first. The closest I'd ever gotten, was running down the street away from someone I pissed off. "It's called pacing yourself." He informed me.
I gave a scoff in return. The guy didn't say anything to me however, only ever so slightly picked up the pace. But as we kept going in silence, I began to loose my breath pretty quick. But I didn't want to seem like a loser, so I kept pushing myself and I noticed we were heading for a trail in the nearby woods. It was a dirt trail, and must have been used often judging by how there was no grass growing on the commonly walked on soil. The only thing that was surrounding it was vegetation. The trees were tall, strong, and looked incredibly healthy. They were evergreens. They must have been old. Their trunks were fat and solid with age, it felt almost fresh to be running through here. It was an odd thing to explain. The air itself felt clean, however I knew deep down that it mustn't have been that different from that podunk little mountain town. It was just a mental thing. And the only other noticeable thing at the moment, were the tiny trickles of sunlight poking through the evergreen's growth. It was a nice setting, and would have been more enjoyable if I wasn't being worked so hard.
I was tired. A small sweat was beginning to break out over my forehead. I honestly didn't think I'd get tired this quick. I over estimated myself. And my fucking smoking habit wasn't helping at all. And as I was mentally encouraging myself to keep pushing on, we rounded a corner a moment after, and it lead straight up a steep hill. Any power I had gained had drained instantly, and I wanted to fall to my knees in defeat. But I couldn't bring myself to do it out of sheer pride. Nor did I say anything, I didn't want to seem like an out of shape loser in front of him. So I began to trudge uphill with no break. My legs feeling like wet noodles, and my body aching with stress. I was getting a cramp in my side from breathing so hard as the minutes passed by, but he never once stole a glance my way.
And I lasted for about another 5 minutes. Until my body just couldn't do it anymore. I can't take this! My mind was screaming, and my muscles were begging me, every ounce of my being was searing in over exertion. I couldn't control my body any longer as I keeled over and landed on my knees in the cold soil, and it was just as Ike announced "we're here!" However I was to busy violently gasping for air. He heard my desperation and must have turned around to look at me, and then he let out this little amused smile. "You said you were alright, so I didn't make any rest stops." I heard his words however I still wasn't really in the mood to reply. It was hurting to breathe, even my ears were throbbing. My whole body was heaving with every small breath and I had sweat caking my forehead.
A truly pathetic sight...
It probably wouldn't have been so bad, maybe if I wore some shorts instead of jeans, however it was against my moral code. And as I was kneeling here I thought Ike was beginning to worry that I might be on the verge of death. But then he burst out laughing at me. I had to hand it to him though, it was really stupid of me to push myself so ridiculously hard over pride. Even I let out a throaty little pathetic chuckle, because what else could I do? Get mad at him? Regardless of how much I hate the kid, it was kind of my fault this time. And when I looked back up, he was just standing there smiling at me. It was warm, and friendly. He meant it. It wasn't fake, it wasn't mocking, it was real. And I couldn't help but find it weird. No matter how mean I can be to him, he never holds a grudge for long. He always seems to get over it. It surprises me to be honest. Like, could I punch him in the face and have him laugh with me tomorrow?
"Good god Ike." I managed to squeak out, using some of the air that I just gained back. But my sentence trailed off as I was working to speak without sounding like a complete out of shape loser. I stood up on shaky legs, and brushed some dirt off my knees. I may be a skinny kid, but running was not my thing. "Why the fuck did you take me up a goddamn mountain?" I asked, he ended up laughing at me again.
"It wasn't a mountain! It was just a hill. Not even that big really." He teased. But for whatever reason, it didn't piss me off. Usually something like that would. Instead I ended up giving a small smile in return. I hadn't tried to, it just happened out of instinct. He didn't show it, but I seen the surprise in his eyes.
"Okay Ike, I'm out of shape. That's what you're getting at right?" He nodded, giving off a small snicker.
"I know, I know, it is kind of a hike." He admitted "but I really wanted to show you this." He explained as he walked through a few trees, I followed behind him. I knew it was probably a nice view, but I wasn't expecting it to be as breath taking as it was. It was gorgeous. I couldn't even explain it. Seeing this view made nothing else matter at all. The sun was cascading down the valley before us, as nature stood there in a classic painting. It was crisp, and perfect in every way. A small mist was leaking through the evergreens however the psithurism was so gentle I couldn't even notice it. Or maybe I just didn't care at the moment. All I wanted to do was greedily take in this view for myself, box it away and store it in my memories. Unlock it when I wanted the rest of the world to just melt away. "You draw and stuff, I just thought maybe you'd be able to get inspired with something like this." He shifted awkwardly.
He was shy to say it, like he knew whatever he said to me would sound dumb. And I'd like to keep his assumptions the truth, however the inspiration that was pumping through my mind was intense. He was right, it helped with that. I wanted to throw myself on the ground and sit here drawing for the rest of the day. And if I could, I would. I wanted to listen to my music and sing as loud as I possibly could, just because no one could here me. I'd be alone and happy about it. Then I had realized I was still gawking.
I immediately spoke up with the realization, "it's nice." I told him, then turned to face the boy with as much apathy as I could muster. He just gave a small nod in return. And then a slightly comfortable silence washed over the two of us. The thing I found cool about this place, was how you could just stand here, with absolutely nothing and be completely entertained because of how gorgeous the scenery was. It was like that shitty town of Southpark had disappeared all together, and I lived alone in a small cabin in the woods. There would be nobody but me, with nothing but my art and all the time in the world. No school, no parents, no problems. Shit, I almost forgot about my mother. I couldn't help but let out a sigh at the remembrance of my unresolved problem.
"What kind of music do you listen too?" Ike's voice piped up. It was quiet however very audible at this current location. It startled me just a little bit, however it took me out of my stupor that was sure to come. I usually fight with him when he asks stupid things like that, however at the moment I just didn't feel like it. Perhaps it was the intense running, or maybe the environment effected my personality. Either or I didn't want to put the energy forth to start a fight. So I just looked at him for a moment. I watched him get awkward immediately after, and it amused me. He had no idea how to socialize with me, which made it so much harder for himself. Specially when he was trying so hard. "I know you always talk about how it's dark, and how I wouldn't understand because I'm a hipster, but I dunno. I'd just like to know." He trailed off as his eyes scanned the scenery far away from me. I scoffed.
"I'm into all sorts of music. I like, rock, metal, black metal, indie rock, classical, jazz, hardstyle, electronic, k-pop-" I stopped immediately. That last one just slipped out on it's own. I hadn't meant to include that in my mindless music babel. I didn't want him to know about that, then again I didn't want anyone to know about that. However as I waited for the teasing to begin, nothing happened. He never pointed it out, but when I looked at him, he had this little knowing smile.
"People label you a lot. But, as for music, do you like, for example: Arctic Monkeys?" He asked. His eyes finding my face.
"Well, yeah. That band is a given. How can you not like them?" His demeanor changed and he appeared to be rather giddy. He must have expected otherwise considering I'm a non-conformist. Oh, well.
"How about Arcade Fire?" I nodded. "Bloody Beetroots?" I nodded. "Two Door Cinima Club?" I snorted.
"I know them, their alright however kinda faggy." Ike began to giggle pretty hard.
"That's so awesome!" He looked like he wanted to dance, or hug me or something. But his restraint is good, so he just took to standing and beaming with unabashed happiness. "Sorry." He apologized. "I'm just pretty excited that you know all of my favorite bands. I can't believe people judge you so badly." He kept repeating that. I wasn't sure what to think or make of it. So I didn't question. I mean, I've always been misjudged. I never longed or cared to be judged properly. I simply never cared, and never would.
"Well, I thought you only listened to sexual songs with catchy beats." I decided to add to our conversation. He laughed.
"You seriously catch me at the wrong moments. I mean, don't get me wrong, Chris Crocker make one catchy ass song, but it's not like I always listen to him, or those kinds of songs in general. Those are the kind of songs I listen to that help me calm my nerves-" He stopped abruptly and choked on his words for a moment. Then he let out this dorky laugh. "Not that I was nervous about you! Well, er, maybe just a little bit. But I wasn't even sure if you'd show. So it was the waiting that was wrecking my nerves." He thought for a moment. "Come to think of it, I have no idea why I dragged you out here. It was a spurt of the moment thing. I was seriously pissed off about what you said. However throughout the night I got over it." He shrugged. "I'm special and I know it. I have my talents and I know it. I may not be that different from everyone else, but I'm doing a damn good job at being me. And I'm happy about it.
I raised my brow at him. He sounded like one of those self esteem Dove commercials. He was such a loser. But then he turned to me and smiled, it was wide and silly. His cheeks and nose were still bitten by the cold air, and tinted a carmine pink. My heart skipped a beat for a moment, and it caused me to frown at him. I think his dumb face might have just offended me. "Don't give me that stupid look."
He giggled, and gave a loud pfft. "Whatever Georgie." He rolled his eyes, and disregarded my comment. "It took a lot of thinking. I was honestly convinced that my life was terrible. For the past little while it's been bothering me. It got worse ever since I got involved with you. I thought I was this stupid conforming little sissy." He explained, gently playing with the fabric of his jacket. "But then I started to think about the things I love to do. I love to run. It's exhilarating. It makes me feel alive, and just good in a general sense. I'm good at it. I thought that I'd try to get you to try it out for yourself." I didn't feel the need to say anything as he paused to give me the opportunity to do so. With nothing, he just continued. "It was also a statement. Running's not your thing, and you're not good at it. In fact your terrible at it. You really sucked at it. It was Horrible-" I shouldered him.
"Oh fuck off. I wasn't that bad." He laughed.
"Anyways. It's my thing, and it's different from you. I can't draw for shit, so even if I'm wearing track pants or American Eagle shit I'm still different. I'm me." He gave me a sideways glance. "I sound like such a tool."
"Yeah." I agreed with an amused snort.
"Can I ask you something?" I looked back at the teen.
"Well, it's not like I'm pointing a gun to your head telling you not to." He gave me an unreal sarcastic laugh before breaking off for his question.
"Do you put up a front at school? You seem.. different right now." His question caught me off guard. I took a moment to ponder the idea. Perhaps I did? I don't even know.
"I think you just wore down all of my energy. It feels like it would take to much effort to start a fight." It was the best I could come up with. He grinned. Then, after that, we chattered for quite some time. It was all nonsense and I probably wont remember what we talked about. However I managed to get past his annoying demeanor and not get pissed off. I was surprised to see that he wasn't like Filmore and his gang, he was eccentric.
Time must have rolled by pretty quickly, and eventually Ike suddenly stopped and let out a random outburst "oh, wow." I wasn't to sure why, but then he got really alarmed. "School!" He exclaimed, while informing me at the same time. At the mention of school, it took a moment to click. Holy shit, I forgot about school. "Shit, class started 5 minutes ago." He stated, his tone turned to a panicked one.
"How the fuck did that slip my mind?" I openly asked myself. Ike never replied because he knew it wasn't for him. Instead we both ran down through the woods to find the trail. And once we found it we ran along retracing our way back to school. It seemed a lot easier with the downhill. And when we finally arrived at the school, we were a good half hour late. We didn't even care as we burst through the front doors together, however we parted ways instantaneously. I had all of my junk in my bag that I needed, so I headed straight to class. I sat in my desk huffing and puffing. I didn't really give a shit about what the teacher had to say. I just fell right back into my usual routine after I calmed down. And thankfully the half hour actually went by pretty quick.
I gathered my things and left when the bell rang, and began my walk down the halls. Everything was normal, but then I seen him. That annoying loser. I hadn't seen him since that last encounter. Filmore. It's not like I feared him or anything, I'd just rather not have to deal with him. It was always just a nuisance. However at this moment there was no stopping it. He seen me. He didn't say anything as we were walking towards each other to cross paths. I was hoping to just walk by without any unnecessary trouble, however I knew deep down that that was wishful thinking. He shouldered me, really hard. I dropped my note book, and two of my loose papers fluttered across the floor as I stumbled to the side. I heard his laughter bubbling up instantly. "Sorry, didn't see you there."
"Bull-fucking-shit." I spat. His friend picked up one of my papers that fell. He cooed in sarcasm, and I felt my face heat up. He turned the drawing around, and it was one of my doodles I'd done to study body proportions. The two people were cuddling. I believe that they must have thought it was something I yearned for. However they were wrong, it was hard to draw two people in a position like that. Clothes crinkled, and a peaceful expression. Either way, it was practice, but none the less embarrassing to have people see it. It had them all laughing in my face. I had nothing to say, I only gave a sigh of frustration. The friend that was holding the paper, walked over to me and shoved the paper to my chest giving it back, but also sending me stumbling back some more. And it was funny when these things went down. The rest of the student body just walked by like nothing was going on. Like there was a wall between us and them. Perhaps I got a glance of sympathy here and there, but I didn't want their fucking sympathy. Fuck, I didn't want this either. No one would ever stop to do anything about it though.
"How much cock did you suck this morning?" Filmore asked me, taking a step forward. He was obviously trying to intimidate me and piss me off. He was still holding that grudge from the other day as far as I could tell.
"None that I can recall." I answered honestly. He scoffed and rolled his eyes.
"I already told you to watch your back at school, because you managed to piss me off enough to go out of my way. I hate you, and I hate to see your face. Don't cross paths with me emo kid. If you do that, you wont find yourself in trouble." I raised my brow at the emo comment, but didn't want to give him the satisfaction.
"Pfft, fuck you, you piece of shit." I shoved my way through them. "I'll go where ever the fuck I please, and I don't care if I see your ugly mug even though I'd rather not." Stupid insignificant pieces of garbage. Leave me the fuck alone.
"Fuck yourself Georgie. Oh! Wait? You probably already do that everyday, knuckle deep in your own ass."
"Don't give yourself a boner Filmore." I muttered under my breath. He didn't hear me, I just retreated down the halls.
"Don't run from your fight Georgie." I rolled my eyes. He wasn't worth my time.
Thanks a lot for the new reviews. I enjoy writing this, and I'm happy others are enjoying it too.