„A Dark Dream"

The sun was setting slowly, seemingly waiting for adventurers to use its glow to regain some of their lost strength. The unconscious members of the party were severely weakened, but fortunately still alive. Anomen had to use up all his healing spells for Xan and Jaheira to come round. Mazzy joined him with her curative blessings, confirming Daria's suspicions about halfling being a paladin, but elven diviner also had an ace hidden up her sleeve. Her minor healing abilities, coming from her unusual heritage, put Nalia on her feet swiftly enough and raised few eyebrows. Nonetheless the patients were still weak and there wasn't much of a space to argue about the place of their rest. It was already dark, only small sign of the end of sun's journey glowing by the horizon, when the camp was finally set on the top of the hill and Merella's body buried by the altar.

Daria was weary after hours of tearing through tunnels and fighting, but she compelled her body to one more effort. She made a round through the camp, checking up on everyone, mostly asleep, covered with blankets on their bedrolls. Xan was deep in his reverie, his hand still clutching his new spellbook, acquired from one of the merchants in Imnesvale. Daria kept a matching tome in her pack, replacing her previous one, lost in the dungeon. She smiled at the thought that they shared at least this small thing. Jaheira was mumbling something in her sleep, as well as Nalia, and Minsc began his usual snoring. Only Anomen was laying peacefully, small smile curling his lips as he slept. Mazzy went to pray by the remnants of Amaunator's altar, but also fell to the lure of sleep. Daria covered her in a blanket, leaving her to her dreams. Yoshimo was the only one who avoided weakening by the shadows' touch, because of the repelling sun gem he held in his free hand during the battle. He was sitting by the fire, rearranging his tools with stoical care. Daria sat on the other end of the campfire, joining him on the first watch.

She felt warmth in her heart looking at her party, her only family left. They all survived, they succeeded in saving the village. She pitied Mazzy for not being able to say the same. To lose everybody, to see her beloved ones changed into foul undead… she wouldn't endure something like that. These few people sleeping in the camp were her only reason to go on, to live. Should they die… there would be nothing.

Because of this Daria fought the need of sleep, willing to guard her family through the night, despite the tiredness. But there was also another reason for staying awake, she realized, when she raised her eyes at the firmament. A reason shining with silver, rising in a clear night sky - a bright full moon, symbol of Sehanine Moonbow, herald of the time most favorable to diviners. For Daria, sign of the worst three nights in a month.

It was a time when her powers were at its peak, yes, but it was also the time when her dreams were clouded with reflections of the strongest emotions experienced, or yet to come. And the strongest emotions usually meant pain, fear and shock, since the time her foster-father was killed upon leaving Candlekeep. She didn't know what her mind had in stock for her after Irenicus' tortures and didn't want to find out. She took her spellbook from her pack trying the best she could to be quiet, despite that even a dragon storming their small encampment would most probably fail to wake her resting friends. She realized she forgot to check whether the large beast had any treasures to sleep on, after seeing its size. It wasn't that she would try to steal anything, since she did value her life more than gold, but curiosity remained.

'I'll check the next time I see a dragon' she decided, before leaning over her spellbook to prepare new spells.

***

She was lying on a floor, side her face pressed to a cold stone. The campfire was gone and she couldn't see any of her friends around. A quick surge of panic raised her heartrate, when she realized that she has no idea where she was or how she got there. She tried to get up, but some strange burden weighted down her limbs, making it impossible to as much as move a finger. She couldn't move her neck to fully view and recognize the place, but she had few horrible suspicions about where she was. Something was moving around her, back and forth, a presence unrecognizable in a dim twilight.

And someone was standing in front of her, only few steps away, but she couldn't see who it was without moving her head. Something akin to a shadow, only without the light source, looming over her betrayed the humanoid form.

She nearly yelped in surprise as something cold touched her bare foot and hastily withdrew. The contact was short, but she could feel that the thing, the presence, was not only cold, but disgustingly evil, corrupted to the very core. She was no saint, but such a corruption was opposing everything she ever fought for, it was everything she feared to become. When a cold tentacle once again caught her foot, this time not letting go, she desperately tried to wiggle away from its grasp, but managed only to bend her neck to see the person standing over her.

It was Xan, looking at her, his face full of hurt. He was beyond the reach of her arms, even if she could move them and it looked as if he was keeping this distance on purpose. A moment of shock resulted in another wicked tentacle seizing her other foot. She tried to ask for help, but her throat was as useless as the rest of her body, crushed under invisible weight. Both tentacles were crawling on her skin, two more clutching her hands. She couldn't fight, couldn't scream when the darkness, which the dark limbs originated from, began to cover her, soaking through her skin to her veins, aiming for the heart. She couldn't even cry with disgust, when her spirit was being defiled, dark taint leaving an irremovable mark.

All this time Xan was watching her motionless, looking into her eyes, as if searching for something hidden from his sight. But when Daria tried to reach him, moving her hand only few inches, he broke his gaze, turned around and began walking, never looking back, toward a city looming in the distance. He stopped once as if considering, but continued his march despite a moment of deliberation. She tried to call him and make him stay, to save her before the darkness consumes her completely, but couldn't even whisper. She tried harder, more desperately, feeling the evil now burning like a tar through her, changing her into something she'd rather die than become. Hatred, anger and revulsion were throttling her, dark tar filling her mouth, plastered to her skin. She was losing her identity, she couldn't hold on to her memories and feelings. Drowning in dark liquid, dragged down by revolting tentacles she almost gave up, when only a tiniest thread was linking her to what she truly was, but suddenly she felt somebody pulling her from this hell, ending her torment, saving her. She didn't remember anything anymore, her mind erased in the depth of evil, and couldn't see an ebony-black hand holding hers, leading her back to the light.

***

Daria woke up lying on a blanket, still unable to move. Only after a moment she realized she was pinned to the ground, held down by Minsc and Yoshimo. She felt completely devoid of any energy, sweated and shaking, but managed to look at her party gathered around her. Judging by the frightened and shocked looks on their faces she must have given quite a show during her nightmare. Nightmare… She probably fell asleep while studying her spellbook, after Mazzy came to take the second watch. She didn't have any rest, plus she woke up everybody else. She always knew that it was a bad idea for her to become a leader. Her only skill in uniting people made them wake up simultaneously in the middle of the night. Minsc and Yoshimo let go of her arms and legs and she curled into a ball, pressing knees to her forehead.

"What happened? Daria, what did you see?" Jaheira put her hand on elf's shoulder.

"Don't touch me!!!" hysteria took over in Daria's voice at the memory of vile tentacles and darkness emerging to seize her once more. The warm fire of the camp disappeared before her eyes, replaced by the grim images from her dream. She tried to back away from the dark monsters, not strong enough to stand on her own.

"Don't!!! Don't…" she was struggling to catch her breath, fear clenching her throat. She felt people surrounding her, though she couldn't see them in the darkness. She raised her arms to protect herself, despair taking over.

"Please, just leave me alone" she begged weakly.

"Daria look at me." She compelled involuntarily. Xan was in her vision, pained expression still on his face, only this time he looked more determined.

"You are safe." He muttered a spell silently. Daria recognized a charm, but couldn't guess why he would use his enchantments now.

"No one is going to hurt you. You are among friends" he continued. His voice was calm and mesmerizing, delicate, but deafening all sounds of her vision. Daria felt torn between her fears and desire to follow it.

"Wake up, mellonamin. Wake up, my friend" the pull was becoming stronger and she closed her eyes, flowing with the current. She relaxed completely feeling something soft under her head and gave up to a dreamless sleep.

***

Her second awakening was much more pleasant, if a bit awkward. The sun was already high above the horizon when she opened her eyes to meet a peculiar view. All her party was stepping on tip toes, bustling around the camp like ants. She watched with amazement the quietest putting on armor ever, performed by Minsc, Jaheira being hushed up by Nalia and Anomen trying to gather his pack, without moving in his clinking armor. She tried to stay motionless taming irrational laugher at her friends' efforts to stay silent. One person was missing however – Xan was nowhere to be seen and she realized why, the moment she began to wonder what this conformable pillow under her head was. She shifted her head to look up and found the missing enchanter.

'It has to be another dream' she thought, realizing her head was resting on his lap. He was reading his spellbook, placed on the ground next to him, but looked at her at the sudden movement.

'I dream about future and past, and it can't be…' Daria felt her face reddening. 'It's not possible. I'm not blushing. I never blush!'

Xan was slightly pink himself, but placed his hand on her forehead, checking the temperature. He opened his mouth to say something, but probably couldn't think about anything coherent and closed it.

Daria's stomach twisted when she tried to recall what happened, leading to her current state. The last thing she remembered was the nightmare, falling and being drown in darkness. She sat down and tried to set some distance between herself and Xan before she vomited everything she ate last afternoon. She already ruined his robe once, long time ago, and that was enough. Someone held back her hair, but Daria closed her eyes tightly, letting the body do what it had to. From the familiar smell of the herbs she recognized it was Jaheira reaching for her to help.

Daria inhaled slowly and forced the nightmare out of her thoughts. She was getting better at ignoring everything painful – all she had to do is focus on the present and don't look back. Or forth. She stopped Jaheira trying to use her healing spells and rose to her feet. All activity in the camp stopped and all eyes turned towards her.

"I'm fine" elven diviner said. As always nobody seemed to believe her.

"'Fine' people aren't that green, my friend" Yoshimo smirked.

Jaheira tried to check her temperature, but Daria drew back. She felt uncomfortable feeling somebody touching her bare skin and the druidess for once didn't want to pry.

"I need to go clean myself. Will you be ready to depart in ten minutes?" Daria looked around the camp, avoiding Jaheira's disapproving look. She knew she's avoiding questions, but since the vision was most likely about the past, relating it couldn't be of any use for them, right? The tents were gone, fire extinguished and packs… packed. Nothing kept them from setting off from the hill.

Daria took her water flask and went into the forest, keeping her eyes peeled to the ground.

***

Going back through the forest was much easier without unholy shroud covering the view, shadow wolves attacking every few steps and uncertainty weighting over their heads. Trees were budding with amazing speed all around them, as if happy to be able to unleash their energy after long time of being suppressed by the dark magic of the portal, and before an hour of walking they were surrounded by a living green forest instead of the dark and dead place they crossed before. It seemed as if a blessing of a long lost god was still shining like the sun over the area, protecting all life within. Daria wished she could forget everything and enjoy being connected with nature, but instead she felt out of place, a false tone in a harmonic song of life. She felt too hot clad in cloak, hood covering her face, even her hands hidden in gloves, but decided to stay this way until she gets used to another horrible memory stashed at the back of her head.

She had to analyze her vision however, in attempt to understand its meaning. The twilight place was most likely Irenicus' dungeon, as she could feel the well-known aura surrounding the mage, making her mad with fear every time he got close. If it was her prison then the darkness and tentacles could symbolize the tortures and madman's ravings about 'unleashing her potential'. But what Xan was doing in her vision? He left the party before they were captured. The city looming in the distance… Could it be Evereska? He looked saddened... Maybe he felt upset because of leaving the party to such fate? The only pleasant thing about the nightmare was that it was showing a part of the past. Visions of future could be even nastier, since they tended to come true in the worst possible moments.

She was given a wide space - none of her companions approached her yet, and she wondered how bad must have her nightmare sounded for her to be shunned like that. She wanted to know, but didn't want to tell anything herself, and to do that she couldn't ask Jaheira nor Xan. Anomen would make it a point on his honor to pull everything out of her and Yoshimo could trick her into saying more than she wanted. No, to get her answers she had to corner Nalia.

An occasion presented itself when one of the straps of young noblewoman's pack came loose. Daria came up to her and fastened it, but remained by her side walking along.

"I'm sorry I woke you up tonight. My nightmares are getting worse it seems." Daria began casually, starting a conversation.

"Don't worry about it. It happens sometimes" Nalia was fidgeting nervously. She obviously didn't see something like that happening. This did not bode well.

"The worst part is that I don't remember what was happening" Daria continued expecting Nalia to get her meaning.

"You were asleep. It's natural you can't remember anything." Guess Nalia wasn't into subtle. She started fidgeting even worse.

"But you saw the whole thing. How bad was it?" It was time for straightforward approach. If this won't work Daria could try being nice, though it was too early for such drastic measures.

"You really want to hear it?" Nalia wasn't sure she wants to say it, but she continued after receiving a nod. "Well… I only woke up when you began screaming, but Jaheira and Xan were already up. The elves have sharper senses, is that right?" she looked as if expecting confirming. None came. "…right. Anyway, you were tossing from side to side and Jaheira was afraid you may hurt yourself, and she told Yoshimo to hold you, he was awake, you see, because she and Xan were still weak and couldn't hold you." Nalia stopped to take a breath. "And then Minsc woke up and held you to the ground, and you began to scream quieter and quieter, and then fell silent, and we were afraid that maybe you stopped breathing." She took another breath pause. "But you woke up and Jaheira tried to ask you what happened, but you screamed again and tried to back away, but then Xan came to you and did something - I think he used a charm - and you fell asleep." Nalia finished her tale taking few deep breaths. It seemed she wanted to get over with it as fast as possible.

"And then?" Daria was interested in the fallowing part the most. Nothing so far explained how she ended up where she woke up.

"Then we took you closer to the fire, because you were very cold" Nalia carried on more reluctantly. "And Xan held you and said he would watch out, so you wouldn't have more nightmares, and I went back to my bedroll."

"And why are you all so nervous?"

"You were yelling horribly, like you were being skinned alive…or worse." There was authentic fear in Nalia's voice. But then again she didn't have much experience with Daria's visions. Truth to be told she didn't have much experience with anything apart from being a noble. "And you were screaming for help and crying, and when you were beginning to sound weaker it was really terrifying, like you were dying in your dream. And you were calling Xan's name all the time, pleading for help" Daria felt like she was splashed with freezing water. "…and he tried to wake you and talk to you, but you didn't hear it."

That certainly was bad. She saw him in her dream and tried to call for his help, but should she know she would be heard, she'd bit her tongue and let the tentacles drag her to the lowest pits of Nine Hells without saying a word. She didn't realize it was a dream until it was over unfortunately.

"Thank you for telling me Nalia" she walked of, distracted, unaware of a worried glance she received from her.

Avoiding Xan would only lead her that far. She couldn't ignore the whole episode, otherwise he could get the wrong idea, that she blames him for something, or that something horrible was going to happen. And she owed him for that charm. And the few times he saved her life by the way. He cared for her, even if not in the way she wanted, and it must have been unpleasant to hear her like that. But what could she do? He was walking ahead of her, alone, and she caught him looking at her with concern. She could apologize at least. Apologizing was a good way to start.

"I'm sorry I woke you up tonight" Daria unknowingly began the second conversation the same way, but without the casual tone this time. "Nalia told me I was calling you in my nightmare. I didn't mean to cause any distress." Xan looked at her with resignation and sighed.

"You should care more about yourself instead of worrying needlessly about me. Your visions got much worse since Baldur's Gate. You have every reason to be concerned."

"It wasn't that bad…" Actually it wasn't the vision that was bad. It was the past it was showing that was, and there was nothing that could be done about it. It was like blaming a mirror for what it showed.

"Believe me, it was" he made a gesture as if he wanted to hold her hand, but reconsidered, recalling how she reacted when Jaheira tried to touch her. "I know it must be hard for you, and I don't want to put pressure on you, but maybe you would feel better if you told me what you saw?"

"I'd rather not, if you don't mind." It could be important, as were some of her divinations from time to time, but this one wasn't, she knew it.

"Daria, do not doom yourself any further. You went through a lot, but you have friends to help you recover. I will always hear you out, should you need it, as long as I am still breathing that is. A pointless as all wishing is, I would rather meet my doom before witnessing yours. You shouldn't close yourself for your friends' help."

"I can't see how stirring such things could be of any help. It was a vision of a past and let it stay this way." She tried to sound harsh, with moderate effect. For once she wanted to keep something for herself, rebel against this influence he had on her.

"Daria…" he looked as if he was to say something more.

"Please Xan, leave it be." She hastened her pace leaving him behind, making him wonder what was the past that haunted her so much.