Oh my god ive left it so long! So sorry everyone! Thank you so much for all the lovely comments and reviews, much appreciated and it really does keep me going! Who watched Casualty on Saturday? I was so excited I think ive rewatched it about 20 times already, so happy I could explode! Love Zax! Big chapter this time around
It was the morning of the funeral and he was making the final preparations to leave in the car. He took a deep shuddering breath. When he had first moved, years ago, he had always told himself he would never ever go back. His mum visited him at his new home, for a reason. Everyone he wanted to visit or have around, visited, or they lived around Holby.
He held a coffee and went to the hospital quickly to say bye to Robyn. He had been a bit harsh on her lately and he wanted to make sure she knew that he appreciated it, he knew she was only ever trying to help, be a good sister, she was a little overbearing but she had a heart of gold
He stopped for a quick fag outside the hospital, he had a feeling this was gong to be his only chance for any peace today
"Max-" sounded a female voice, but it wasnt Robyns. He turned to see Zoe, holding her own cigarette and gazing forward
"thought you were off?" she questioned, looking at him
"I am, was just coming to say bye to Robyn, then-"
"the desire for the cigarette just took over" she gave him a sarcastic smile
"something like that" he gave her a small smile, she laughed at him, appreciating the rare smile
"how you holding up?" she asked him, eyeing him with concern, he felt her eyes trailing from his shoes to the mess that was his hair, he hadnt really been taking care of himself, he hadnt shaved in a few days, he didn't really style his hair, he didn't have the energy to care at the moment
"i think you can see for yourself" he smiled a little, she chuckled and nodded, giving him a low whistle
"is there anything I can do?" she asked, taking a puff of her cigarette, and suddenly the tone of the conversation had gone back to being serious
"no. thanks though" he told her, before stubbing his out. He felt a hand on his arm, Zoe was looking at him, forcing him to stare back. He caught her eye
"tell me if you need anything" she told him, calmly. He looked away
"thanks Zo" he quietly said, holding her arm for a moment. Looking into her eyes, he almost felt like everything was going to be fine. But the moment he looked away, he didnt feel like it would be ok
2 hours later, and he was at the local pub, in his old town.
The barman was the same, the locals were the same, but unfortunately, so were the people he feared, the locals he didn't want to see, ever again.
While he had gone to uni and got out of the town, they had got even more reliant on drugs, some of them sold drugs.
There was one friend of his, Charlie, who had always been ok. He was his best friend. He sometimes visited, stayed over with him, had nights out. He was the only one who he wanted to keep in touch with, he had arranged to meet him at the pub so he didn't have to go alone, he didn't want to see his mum just yet, she would only ask how he was countless times and he wasn't ready for that
"Max!" Charlie said, clapping his back as he got to the bar
"Sorry to hear about your old man" he told him, noting the dark circles under his friends eyes
"Me too"
"i tried calling you a bunch of times"
"yeah sorry pal I changed numbers a while back" he had wondered why his oldest friend hadn't even tried getting in touch, that had cleared it up
"too many girls?" Charlie chuckled, Max shook his head with a grin
"I dont even know myself" he laughed, Charlie suddenly looked a little worried, Max followed his gaze, seeing why immediately
Ryan and Trevor, the two roughest guys on the estate had shown up, the two that used to do drugs, the two that used to be Max's friends, the ones that used to make him take drugs. The ones who had spiked him years ago, putting him in hospital.
"I need to tell you something" Charlie whispered, trying to get Max away from the eyeline of the other two, they couldn't see him, not yet
"lets just ignore them" Max replied, folding his arms and drinking a pint. He didnt need this, not today and not, ever. This was why he never wanted to come back to this place
"no Max-" Charlie stuttered, pulling him to a corner so the other two didnt see them
"what, what could it be, its been years"
"those two deal"
"right, and my little teenage drug phase went out years ago, just because I'm a bit sad at the moment doesn't mean I want to load up, i thought you out of anyone would know that" Charlie was in the same boat as Max, they used to do drugs because they were forced, because they had nothing else better to do, nobody to turn to
"they are claiming they used to deal to your dad". Max wheeled around. He had known his dad left, he had known he liked a pint, he liked fun. He was not into drugs
"he did not take drugs Charlie" he said, sternly, looking at his friend, who looked earnest, concerned. Looks wise he was opposite to his friend, he was blonde haired, blue eyed, tanned, and liked to hit the gym pretty much daily. He had turned it around for himself, but he had stayed in the town
"thats why ive been trying to ring you psl, hes been around these past few weeks, ive seen him up here with your mum once or twice, he asked about you so I tried to call"
"you didnt try very hard. anyway, why would he ask about me?" Max bitterly replied, trying to piece together all this information,
Why hadnt his mum said anything "you could of faecbooked, emailed-"
"i didnt think ok, these two have been on my back for weeks"
"why, are you-?
"no, im not on drugs. They reckon now your dads passed that his debts on you. But, your not here, and they knew that I was in touch" Max sighed.
This sounded like the crap that this town would pull on him, nothing was ever simple.
Of course his dad hadnt simply wanted to get in touch with him, he had been on drugs, he was in debt, he wanted help. Now Max was at the pub, probably with no way of getting away from these people, with no money, no dad, no Zoe, and a very shaky best friend, a friend that didn't deserve to be involved in this, especially as he was miles away in Holby, avoiding everything. He knew what it was like with those guys, they could turn up at every corner, threatening family members, anyone.
They had a network now, people worked for them, they were the ringleaders
"its not true" Max lamented
"ive seen him, I tried to stop him. It wasnt some full blown addiction it was just a bit of weed"
"just a bit of weed?" he asked, shaking his head. This time 2 years ago he would of seen it casually but since he started working in the hospital he didnt, it was dangerous, he had seen patients who had their lives ruined by this stuff, and now it turns out his dads on it
"all im saying, if you believe it or not, you need to stay away from Ryan and Trevor. They know what the ocassion is, they wanted you here to try and get you to pay, I've already told them to sod off but they aren't going"
"im not doing that"
"maybe it would be wortth settling it?"
"no, im not that snotty kid who does everything they say anymore. They are getting bugger all from me Charlie, and you better not pay them either"
"dont worry mate I wasnt going to" Charlie shook his head and shrugged as Max ordered a water.
"Thanks by the way Charlie"
"For what?"
"Having my back, even when I'm MIA"
Charlie gave him a pat on the back, and walked away to use the loo
He was going to drive back today, there was no way he was staying longer then he needed to
Max went outside for a quick fag before the service started, wishing more then anything that he could drink and drive. He sighed, breathing in the air around him, and seeing the church up the road. He didnt want to walk in there, it still didnt feel real to him
"Maxxy!" shouted a familiar voice, and he turned. He knew who that was without trying, it was Trevor, the guy that used to throw him against walls, threaten to hurt his mum, threaten to hurt Robyn. He was the worst one
"Thought I would see you at some point" he commented, watching as the man next to him lit up a fag and leant agaisnt the wall
"sorry to hear about your old man" he told him, roughly it sounded insincere, he knew Trevor couldn't wait to start telling him about whatever false debt he had incurred
"your not sorry, you want me to pay for his drugs. Which, by the way, is as likely as me taking a trip to the moon in the next hour"
Trevor turned to him, narrowing his eyes
"always thought you were funny didnt you?"
"funnier then you, yes" he smiled. He didn't feel scared of him anymore, he had moved on, unlike the others. He was in a completely different place to these losers now
"see, I dont think you understand Walker. Your dad owes me about a grand"
"thats not possible though is it? and while we are having this chat, you leave Charlie out this. He's my mate, not my family, so stop hassling him at every turn"
"he kept saying there was a bank problem, and i don't need to hassle Charlie now your here in the flesh"
"and thats not my problem"
"hes dead, so it is your problem" Trevor stood a little closer to him
"I'm not scared of you" he replied, his eyes meeting Trevor's and his gaze holding. He wasn't going to look down like he usually did, like he used to
"you should be"
"well im not" Max responded, even though he was a little now. This was reminding him of school again, and this time he couldnt run home
He had managed to get through the funeral, just about, he was starting to feel ill, he had been distracted for the whole time, he couldn't focus on one point, he had cried, but he hadn't even felt present, he had Charlie's hand on his back as well as his mothers but he barely felt it, he didn't know what was going on
He didnt understand why, he wasn't drunk, he hadn't touched anything apart from a water at the pub, which washed down his half pint nicely
"are you ok Max?" his mum asked. He looked at her, his eyes widening a little. She looked blurry, almost as if she was moving from side to side, but he knew she was standing still, making it all the more odd
"fine"
"you cant be fine after that, do you want to talk?" he didn't want to talk to his mum, he had a lot of questions for her but he didnt want to ask them, he didnt want to hear it. He also knew it was going to be pretty hard for her aswell. He didnt need to dump all his feelings on her at the moment, he was barely processing it himself, he didn't even know how he was feeling, apart from right now, he felt ill.
"actually mum I think im gonna get going, I wanted to get back to holby tonight"
"its only a few hours away" she reasoned, touching his shoulder
"honestly id rather go now, drive while its light"
"its not anything to do with those lads is It? Trevor and the other one? They cant scare you away from your dads funeral.." she started
"no, its not that. Th-his funerals over. I just want to get home mum" she looked at him and sighed, before pulling him into a hug. He pulled his arms around her and hugged her back
"are you ok?" he asked, using her to steady himself slightly
"yeah. Ill be fine, its all just been a bit of a shock. Its just been really quick"
"i know what you mean" he agreed. His eyes blurred over once again, he rubbed her shoulder
"say bye to Charlie for me, I dont know where hes got to. But give him my new number" he quickly said, he needed to get out now, he was feeling worse and worse, he felt a bead of sweat appearing on his head. Which was odd, because it was raining
"ok" she said, quietly, watching him go, worried.
He started to drive, wondering why he felt so odd. Was this some sort of delayed shock? His eyes were blurring, he was sweating, but he was shaking. Did he have a cold? Was this what people said was an emotional response, he didn't feel emotional he just felt like rubbish
Half an hour later, and it was even worse. He was coughing, he was tired, he could barely keep his eyes open, he decided to call Robyn, just to let her know he was on his way back
"Robyn?" he asked, hearing her pick up on the first ring, he was relieved at this point to have such a caring sister, especially when he had been pushing her away
"Hey, how did it all go?" she asked, she sounded concerned
"fine, it was fineee"
"are you slurring? Are you drunk?" she asked, her voice raising a little, sounding a little surprised
"no,no, im driving home actually. I feel a bit crap actually, sweating, coughing, I feel really tired"
"well its been a pretty big day-" she reasoned "when are you home?" she asked, a softer tone to her voice
"hopefully in about 10 minutes"
"wicked, ill get some ice cream and we can watch some movies"
"i couldnt tell you how perfect that sounds right now"
"oh I know bro, im good at these things" she replied, and he could tell she was smiling
"see you soon" he smiled, closing his eyes for a few seconds, he felt like he needed glasses almost, he couldnt see a thing, he was drowsy, he was sweaty. He wasnt generally a sweaty person, and it wasn't like he was exercising, he was just driving
Robyn walked towards Zoe, knowing she was a softer touch then Connie
"Zoeee" she sing songed, and the other woman turned around, a kink in her eyebrow
"yes?" she looked a little amused, the other girl obviously needed a favour
"could I knock off half an hour early? I wouldnt ask its just Max is coming home early and he said he feels ill and to be honest he sounded a bit rubbish on the phone" she started rambling a little, and Zoe watched her. She wondered what was wrong with Max
"Yeah sure, go now, ill cover you with Connie. She said she would be upstairs anyway so lets keep it between us" she nodded, walking past. Robyn was shocked, she was expecting at least a little bit of a fight to be put up, Zoe wasn't that easygoing, not normally
"Are you sure?" she asked, Zoe nodded. She knew this would help Max, if he wouldn't let her help, she could at least try
"Thanks Zoe, I really appreciate this" she gave her a warm smile, and Zoe started to walk away
"look after him" she said, quickly, and a little quietly
"what?" Robyn asked, looking a little suspicious
"You said he was ill didnt you?" Zoes eyes widened a little, she couldnt believe she had gone and said that out loud.
She was worried about him, more then she wanted to admit. She also didnt want to admit that she was upset that Max didnt seem to need her. She missed him, even this sad version of him.
She just wanted him around and now she couldnt, she was backed into a corner.
Max had manged to get himself into Holby, he just had a few minutes to go. He was still sweating, he felt even more bleary eyed, he was so tired he was ready to fall asleep at the wheel. His phone suddenly rang through the bluetooth system on his car
"Max?" came a frantic voice
"Charlie?" he mumbled
"where are you?" he heard the fear in his friends voice, he suddenly sat up a little bit, hoping that him talking to Trevor hadn't made him take some sort of revenge on Charlie
"on my way home?" he answered
"on the bus?"
"no, driving"
"pull over, now" charlie said, sounding even more worried, he could hear his voice shaking
"im almost there mate, ill call you when im in"
"no, you dont understand, while Trevor was talking to you Ryan spiked your drink, I heard them talking about it, laughing about old times and saying you should of paid, pull over and call an ambulance, I called the police"
"bastards" he sighed, putting one hand on his head, which was now feeling really hot. He needed to call someone
"ill sort it, thanks Charlie" he slurred, hearing his friend shouting his name before the line got cut. He then picked up the phone and dialled the one person he didn't want to bother. But the one person he knew could help, the one person who knew about his past, the doctor
Zoe was outside, before her phone started ringing. She narrowed her eyes, it was Max. She wasnt sure why he would be ringing. She almost considered leaving it, but she couldn't
"Max?" she answered, and she was immediately alarmed by the heavy breathing she heard on the other end of the phone, was he drunk? Or worse on drugs?
"Zo- Zo you know those guys I told you about" he started, still driving, talking to the speaker, he was starting to panic now, there was nowhere he could get to pull over without causing some kind of crash, he could barely see and it was dark, it was getting darker, he didn't even know where he was going anymore
"what guys?" she asked, confused "slow down Max, talk to me"
"the drug guys". She froze, he sounded distant, his words were slurred, he didn't sound alert at all. She could hear the wind in the background, meaning that he was driving. She stubbed her cigarette out
"what about them?" she asked, wondering why he wanted to talk about them, why it was such a desperate need that he needed to ring
"they-they thought dad owed them money-" he started rambling
"max, your making no sense"
"they think I do, and I didnt give to them, and I feel really odd and then Charlies called and said that they've spiked my drink and I need to pull over- but I cant see- theres nowhere to go"
Zoe took a sharp intake of breath, he sounded awful, she had thought so as soon as he had called he didnt sound like himself. She tried to think, she needed to do something, time wasn't on her side, or his, she needed to get him to pull over without making him panic
"ok, just take a breath, just get to the nearest patch of grass, anything, you need to pull over. Ill come and get you, tell me where you are" she was trying to keep herself from sounding scared, but she was
"i c-" he started to stutter, he couldn't even speak, he kept trying to speak but the words weren't coming out, then someone came past in a car, the lights blaring. he saw the flash of the lights, that was the last thing he saw.
He couldnt see anything anymore, he was plunged into darkness.
Zoe heard as there were beeps, she hoped that meant he was pulling over. She couldn't of been prepared for what she had heard next
She heard skidding, banging, followed by an almighty crash. What made it worse was that she couldnt hear Max at all, not even the heavy breathing she could hear before, he wasn't saying anything, she didn't even hear a shout, a scream, he must of blacked out
"Max?" she asked, loudly into the phone
"MAX?" she called, frantically, tears starting to fall, her phone fell out of her hands, she was trembling violently, had she really just heard that? Had she heard Max crashing his car, he had called her for help and he had crashed, she let a small sob emit as she started shaking, she tried to call Max back but she just got a dialling tone each time, she didn't know where he was, she didn't know how he was
"Zoe, whats wrong?" Connie asked looking alarmed and heading over to her, she had never seen Zoe cry, not like this. Not over patients, not over anything
"I need to go on a break" Zoe shakily told her, starting to go towards her car, another tear threatening to fall. She didn't have time for this, she needed to go.
"Why?" Connie asked, extending a hand to Zoe's shoulder
"I just got a call from Max, he was driving back, he said his drink got spiked and I heard him crash Connie, I think its bad" she spoke so quickly, she knew it was bad, he hadn't replied, he had been drugged
She was shaking, Connie was confused, she hadn't taken in any of the facts apart from the fact that Max had called Zoe. Zoe over his friends, and his sister..
"Why woul-" Connie started, startled
"We've been seeing eachother ok, not so much recently but- I cant talk about this now I need to find him, he's out there somewhere alone, and he's crashed, he wasn't responding, he won't pick up the phone i can't explain this right now" she snapped, walking to her car, another sob racking her body, it was so horrible not knowing anything, she couldn't lose him, not after this, not now
"Zoe!" Connie shouted, as she got into her car, wiping a few stray tears away. Connie got in on the other side
"Four hands are better then two. Lets go find him" she told her colleague, she didn't want to comment on anything else, she wanted to help the life that was now in danger, and Zoe couldnt do it alone.