In which Susie breaks machinery and the voices in Envy's head turn traitor
It would have been much easier to get to the front drive if the kitchen, hallway and sitting room hadn't been transmuted into a war zone. And Envy wasn't stupid enough to try the old keep-your-head-down-and-pray approach to crossfire. But he was damned if that bastard was getting to that frickin annoying short alchemist-wanna-be first. He had survived weeks of hostage keeping, been captured, stuck in a Flammel array, rescued, whacked, brow-beaten, tied up and shaved. That was far too much to let his leverage go so easily. And if that retard didn't have the sense to get out of the god-damned way when people started shooting he deserved to get hit.
There was only one sensible option really, to go round from outside. There could be another truck full of soldiers out there of course but if there were they'd probably already got her. He could always circle back for Pride, get the two of them out of here and steal back that annoying little bitch once he'd got some red stones.
So what are you waiting for?
Of course there was also a good chance that he was out there.
Chicken.
The homunculus headed for the nearest window with a snarl. One of the voices in his head had clearly turned traitor. He added that to his mental tally of things that were somehow Elric's fault and vaulted out into the garden, narrowly missing an overgrown shrub.
This was stupid. He was weak, he could barely change form, he didn't have any handy weapons or backup and he was walking straight into a situation likely to contain in no particular order, sharp shooters, state alchemists, chimera, a new and powerful homunculus and him of course. All for one more in a long string of pathetic human bastards.
Oh so you're gonna run away and let Him take her after all that huh? The little bitch CUT YOUR HAIR. Are you gonna let her get away with that? Are you gonna let HIM win so easy?
That was more like it. Still, caution was called for in this particular situation. He flattened against the wall, changing to an adult male form he picked at random. He paused for a moment waiting for the pain to ease away. May be he should have given it a military uniform….then again they were looking for a shape shifter and they'd probably seen all the soldiers that'd come for the raid.
You're stalling.
He eased along the wall. What had happened to the dog? The damn thing seemed to think it had a duty to yap at anything that moved but the only sounds he could hear were coming from inside. It was stupid the things you thought about when your life was in danger.
Frickin typical if I die worrying about a damned dog.
He reached the corner and peeked round. Right, one white military van battered, one old banger no suspension, no chimera, no sign of him, no soldiers and no female midgets.
Right, now what?
Go over and check, moron. Unless you're too scared?
I am NOT afraid of Him.
Yeah right, pull the other one.
Shut up!
Chicken!
Screw you!
He broke cover, heading for the van.
He was pleasantly surprised when no one shot him. There were no ominous growls, no give away flashes of light, no swish of claws in the air. It was a bit of an anti climax really.
Waitaminute….where's the driver?
The front seats were horribly empty but the van was meant to be carrying personnel and there was always the back…….Where they usually kept the stock of weapons and ammo.
Shit.
He glanced around quickly, there was no one in sight, the clamour of the battle of the living room was still strong enough to raise any dead in the vicinity not currently walking. The homunculus took a deep breath, surprise, the guy wouldn't be expecting it, it would all be fine.
Yeah, right.
He pressed himself against the side of the van and started easing towards the back doors. Something grabbed his ankle.
And Envy, to his eternal shame, yelled loud enough to alert the military in South City, let alone the front room.
-
Susie wriggled out from under the van. "Well done moron! Why don't you scream a little louder then they'd be able to hear you in North City too!"
"I did not scream you little-"
"Yeah you did. You think I was a soldier?"
"Shut up."
"Seriously how many soldiers hide under trucks?"
"Go soak your head."
Susie snorted. "So do you know how to hotwire this thing or not?"
"Is that what you're trying to do?!"
"Well I was until you showed up-"
"You realise that's the gas tank right? The engine's up this end…"
"Shut up!"
"And you don't have to hotwire it anyway-" Envy continued in what passed for patience coming from him.
"Oh so it's just going to magically start is it?!"
"No." Envy stated calmly. He walked around to the back of the van, opened it up and pulled the unconscious soldier out.
"Generally the driver has a set of keys."
"I knew that!" Susie insisted, snatching them from him.
"Would you be able to see over the steering wheel?"
"STOP CALLING ME SHORT!!!!"
"And who's bringing the military down on our heads now pipsqueak?"
"They're blowing the kitchen up! They can't hear us!" She protested.
"Really so when you were complaining that I'd-"
"Screamed like a little girl? OW!"
"Can you even drive?"
"Can you? Anyway we have to go back in there-"
"No we don't-"
"To get my Aunts-"
"Those hags can take care of themselves-"
"And Pride-"
"If that retard is too stupid to-"
Susie stopped listening. Instead she dug into her pocket, quietly breaking off a piece of chalk. She kept her scowl carefully in place as she drew the array out on the side of the van. There was something satisfying about how far backwards Envy jumped when he saw the flash of light. It didn't last.
"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST-WAS THAT A TIRE?! THAT HAD BETTER FRICKIN WELL NOT HAVE BEEN A WHEEL!!!!"
Susie smiled an irritating Elric smile. "You're not going anywhere without my say-so, and I'm not going anywhere without my Aunts-and Pride."
She sat cross legged in the dirt beside the van.
"YOU'RE WHAT?!"
"Oh come on, otherwise you'd just have hit me over the head and taken the damn keys right?"
Envy goggled, she was clearly smarter then she looked. "I wouldn't have-" He began
"Are you going to get them or what?"
The homunculus grabbed her arm and pulled her up, using far more strength then was strictly necessary. Muttering mutinously he dragged his sister back to the open window.
-
"So what's the plan?" Susie asked in a tone eager enough to be infuriating.
"The plan was to get the hell out of here as quickly as possible. Now the plan seems to be to become collateral damage in a three-way last-man-standing-wins brawl-you don't read westerns do you?"
"Nope. Why?"
"Then you won't be disappointed."
"So what's the plan?"
"You stay here-"
"WHAT?!"
"And I get them out. And if I get shot, sliced or transmuted into any state I don't want to be in you suffer for as long as I can think of ways to make you." Envy snarled.
"Why can't I help?" Susie gripped.
He shrugged. "Because you're six, because you're short, because you're a girl, because you'd be useless in a fire-fight, because you broke the frickin car-take your pick."
"You're a bastard."
"So are you."
"An arrogant infuriating bastard. And I'm eleven."
"Whatever you say short-arse." He took a final glance around but the coast was clear and you could only put these things off for so long.
He leapt through the window.
It is amazing how quickly bullet holes and alchemic burns could change the atmosphere of a room. The focus of the battle seemed to have retreated to the dining room so Envy risked running to the opposite wall. He was pleasantly surprised to find he reached it without getting shot. Military marksmen had obviously gone downhill since the Elric-days.
Another rather large piece of the floor above had fallen on Pride, but he didn't appear to have noticed. He was happily contemplating what was left of the ceiling when Envy hauled him out. He didn't appear to notice when his brother slung him over his shoulder and pelted back across the room. Had he still been alive there would have been several loud complaints about being used as a human shield, as it was Pride did not so much as whimper when he was hurled through the window.
Susie may have commented when several kilos of alchemically animated flesh landed on her, but Envy didn't stick around to hear it. He dashed across the room ducking into the doorway for shelter. A quick glance into the next room revealed a good amount of Lust-induced rubble, so he ducked and skidded behind a decent pile of bricks.
I really hope this wasn't a supporting wall-when was the last time I took cover behind a supporting wall?
Someone was shouting what might have been an order, but it was drowned out by the crash of crockery.
Oh yeah-that's why you don't take cover behind supporting walls…
You're stalling again.
Shut up!
It's ONLY Lust!
EXACTLY-after last time she's gonna-
She probably doesn't even REMEMBER that, it was DECADES ago-
I'm gonna die.
Chicken!
He edged towards the kitchen, sticking close to the walls and convenient cover. A well- timed alchemic-outburst made the floor shake and almost floored him. The remaining walls at the back of the house faired far worse. A few more tonnes of bricks slid inwards making the dust billow upwards again.
For a long moment the world was a blurry brown, punctuated by gunshots, yells and flashes of light. Then Lust was running towards him, practically on top of him.
Oh crap-
She's probably not gonna recognise this form-
She skidded to halt and glared at him. "You."
Oh crap-
Well she probably doesn't remember about-
Her claws slid slowly outwards and she raised her hands-
Oh crap-
Envy ran.
-