Chapter 11 – a nice chat

Mr Davis' POV

The tall, blonde boy pulled away from the girl and suddenly the whole room was very calm. The children sat down on the sofa and the brunette started eating some of the packed breakfast.

"Please, Mr Davis, sit down," said the youngest boy sweetly, "I hope you will excuse my brothers and sisters, we were just playing dares."

"Ha ha! Tame game that was!" Boomed the more muscular son.

"Shut up Emmett," hissed the smallest girl. Thank god he was Emmett not Edward and I wouldn't have to face teaching him.

"So which ones are Edward and Alice?" I asked quietly, wondering if I should just turn around and sprint, somehow I got the impression that if I did, they would catch me pretty easily, "I could come back later if your parents are out."

"No, it's quite alright," said the tallest, blonde girl, "I'm Rosalie Hale their eldest sister." she motioned towards the youngest boy and smallest girl, "that's Alice and Edward." then she motioned to the brunette girl, "that's Bella Swan, she's going to collage next year too."

I tried my best to laugh, somehow the tenseness that should be in the room had been lifted, "Well, no need for a side trip then."

They all stifled a laugh too.

"So what I came for was to get to know you all. I thought we could have a nice chat together."

Edward's POV

"So what I came for was to get to know you all. I thought we could have a nice chat together." Mr Davis said.

Ha! I though watching Alice's visions of the day. Mr Davis day would be anything but nice if he stayed.

Jasper and Emmett slipped off into the garage and Rose made some tea, "Put something tasty in it." I muttered at vampire speed. Bella just caught it and clasped her hand over her mouth to stop a laugh. She turned very red.

"I'm sorry to ask but from a professional view I think I should ask what your Rosalie did to you Bella. You don't look well, I think you might have hysterics from shock or something, it can be quite common in social abuse-"

This set Bella off; she just couldn't keep it in, "Ha, ha, ha! Rose, Rose never..."

A wicked grin crossed Alice's face, "I'm sorry Mr Davis, you shouldn't have seen that. Rose does have some problems and Bella's problems do clash with them. One of Rose's is actually an eating disorder, we just sent her to make some tea for herself, would you like one?"

"Wait, you're offering me tea when..." he stopped in his disapproval when Alice's sickly sweet stare didn't stop, "I would love tea but you're telling me that your sister is abusing-"

Alice interrupted him, "Rose, bring out some biscuits too, I haven't seen you eat in weeks." If Bella was anywhere near finishing he hysterical laughing, now she started again,

"Yea, Rose, I can't remember ever seeing you eat!"

An anorexic sister, a hysterical girlfriend who is abused by the sister, an overly violent brother, a very... charismatic brother and adopted parents that haven't been around looking at the state of the house... no wondered Edward thinks he can read minds, it wouldn't surprise me if he could... I buried my head in a pillow subtly as I laughed trough Mr Davis' thoughts, then I accidental bit the pillow and covered Alice, Bella and Mr Davis in white feathers.

"Edward," Alice scolded, "That was 'Mom's favourite."

"Um, will Esme and Carlisle, your adopted parents, will they be home soon?"

This opportunity was too good to miss, "Mom, Dad? What, we're adopted?" whispered Alice putting on a wide-eyed shock-horror face, "Jasper!"

Jasper came running in, he gave even more realistic evils to Mr Davis and wrapped his arms (perhaps a little too... lovingly...) round Alice, "Please, Mr Davis, Alice and Edward didn't know yet."

I fixed my face to the correct emotions and Bella (still giggling and flushed bright red) came and hugged me, "Adopted," I mused, "I never would have guessed." Mr Davis' face was a classical mix of embarrassment and horror at what he had done, then Rose walked in with seven inch stilettos and a tiny dress on.

"I hope I didn't take too long, but my old sweats were hardly appropriate for company." Rose had actually been wearing skin tight jeans but Mr Davis hadn't noticed; thank god, who wants a pervert for a teacher? Thought Alice lazily.

"Actually," Bella said, "I don't think I'm dressed quite appropriately, if you'll excuse me sir." She smiled flirtatiously at him, "Alice?"

They disappeared up the stairs and Rose bent over to put the tea and cookies on the table, leaning right over poor Mr Davis of course.

"Tea?" she asked airily, am I genius or what? Rose thought smugly. I nodded back subtly.

Rose started sipping the spiked tea slowly, it didn't make any difference what was in the human food, it was just as nasty tasting. Remind me to sick this up before we get a repeat of Emmett on Friday night she thought. Rose was saving the actual biscuit eating for Bella's amusement.

"Rose, you're not going bulimic?" asked Alice disapprovingly as she and Bella walked back downstairs in dresses and shoes that matched Rose's. I noticed Bella clinging for dear life on the banisters as she manoeuvred the shoes.

"Excuse me, Rosalie, but I thought you were just anorexic... this could be very serious and perhaps I should..." started Mr Davis. His face was still a classic grimace, I wondered if he had detected exactly what Rose had added to the tea...

"Sir," interrupted Jasper distantly from the sofa where he was still sitting, waiting for Alice, "I don't think we want to get social involved, think what they might do to poor Alice. They might put her back in the asylum!"

Alice, who was about to curl back into Jasper's lap carried on across the room with a grimace, she hit the wall wildly, making another mark by the one Emmett made on Friday, "No, PLEASE, I don't think I could face it!"

No surprise she was in a home. Strange little creature. And how did she know Rosalie was going to spit up her food? Thought Mr Davis, does she have precognitions?

"Elementary my dear Watson." I grinned, it didn't look like we would be able to have him teaching us next year anyway, so why not have fun?

Did he really just read my mind? He awed.

My phone started to buzz in my pocket, it was Emmett upstairs, I didn't bother answering but then Alice saw what he would do to my room if I didn't, "Hello?" I asked, ignoring Mr Davis' protests,

"Look here Edward, put that down, I think we need some serious talks."

Alice was still dancing around the room manically, she leaned over the back of his chair and whispered into his ear, "Last year Edward tried to commit suicide. I wouldn't annoy him. He's attempted murder too." ALICE I thought, that was out of order. I carried out Emmett's instructions happily as Alice folded herself smugly into Jasper's lap.

"Incest!" I coughed.

"WHAT?" Jasper shouted, leaping up and hitting his head on the high celling.

"It's true," I said seriously, "they share a room, you can come see if you like."

"I don't think it would be very professional if I did, I think I should be off now." hmm, that older boy's funny, he thought, it would be interesting to see their room... no, no, it wouldn't be professional. It's as if he's controlling my emotions... I really, really want....

Rose was in with the plan she grabbed the already curious Mr Davis' hand and pulled him up stairs.

The first things his eyes flicked to in Alice's enormous room was the beauty salon sized bathroom and enormous walk in wardrobe, but then the French underwear and fluffy handcuffs Emmett had lovingly arranged took his focus.

"Alice, Jasper!" Emmett gasped walking in, "Is that mine?" he said pointing to a large leather whip.

Rose forgot the game, "No it's not! Alice, you stole my outfit..." she paused, in shock at herself, "I mean, it does look like yours Em."

How would she know? Wondered Mr Davis.

"Mr Davis, I am very sorry for my brother and sister's appalling behaviour, let me make it up to you," Bella planted a big kiss on Mr Davis' surprised lips and wrapped her hand round his waste, wow he thought, "come on, we'll have that talk you wanted."

Mr Davis couldn't take it any more and he ran out the house. He was right earlier, we could have caught him but we were all laughing too hard to get up.

We listened to his tyres turning off onto the free way, "I wonder when he'll spot the paint job!" Emmett laughed.

***

Mr Davis' POV

I ran out the house frantically. I spotted the pink lingerie that was painted on the car but I didn't care quite enough to go and demand it was removed. My mind was buzzing as I drove back to my sister's house. It was only when it was too late that I saw the wolf in the road...

***

An emergency service guy's POV

I hoped I didn't have to be the one to tell Carlisle that his children's future teacher was a teacher no more on the way (or maybe the way back) from his house. The circumstances of the incident were uncertain, it must have been some animal that he hit but it couldn't have been hurt, Mr Davis' Mercury was in a more sorry state though. Maybe it was one of the bears that had been spotted about last spring. He survived the crash but Mr Davis seemed to have lost his memory. I hoped Dr Cullen wouldn't take it personally, like if he were on holiday it wouldn't have happened... I had been strange circumstances though. Mr Davis had been discovered covered in pink feathers, with nasty garlic breath – as if the last thing he ate was garlic tea; and with strange pink blotched on the car. Still, someone's got to break it to the Cullens.

Sorry I changed the last bit. I didn't really want Mr Davis to die xxx