"I have to say, Sheldon, I'm flattered that you personally asked me to be your pretend girlfriend tonight," Bernadette said, a bright smile on her face as she drove them to the science center.

"Well," Sheldon said, sitting in the passenger's seat of Bernadette's car, "to be honest, my first choice for a fictional mate would have been Penny, as she seems like the kind of person who's more capable of pulling off this type of deceptive ruse. However, since Amy has already met Penny, and the two of them have evidently become good friends now, I had no choice but to go with my second option, which was you."

Bernadette's smile faded. "Oh," she said, and a brief silence followed, before she spoke up again. "Well, anyway, I get that you're planning to totally one-up this David guy tonight, but I was wondering, is there anything in particular you want me to find out about him? Or about their relationship?"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows. "Like what?"

"You know, like how much time do they spend together on a daily basis, or have either of them spent the night over each other's apartments yet, or, I don't know, have they…" Bernadette paused, raising her eyebrows suggestively. "…had sex yet?"

Sheldon's eyes widened into two small, perfectly round spheres. He had never even thought of that before. Then again, why would he think of that? It was disturbing in every way. They couldn't be having coitus. Could they?

Of course, even if they were, what would it matter to him? It wasn't as though Sheldon was interested in Amy that way. Physical attraction had nothing to do with this. Tonight's goal was simple, to get Amy off his mind for good so he could once again return his focus on his one, true love: Physics. He had no right to ask Bernadette to dig up details about Amy's personal life. It was none of his business. Frankly, he didn't want to know what kind of amorous activities Amy partook in with her boyfriend, as the thought of her being physically involved with that guy made his blood boil. No, they couldn't be having sex. They just couldn't be.

He realized, suddenly, that perhaps his new found mental obsession with Amy did run a little deeper than he'd previously thought after all. Much, much deeper, in fact. Logically, he knew he shouldn't be getting involved with her, but he was already far beyond the point of stopping himself now.

"Do you really think they've already engaged in coitus?" Sheldon asked when he just couldn't take it anymore.

Bernadette gave him a coy smile, which only made him feel even more unsettled about everything. "Well, we'll never know for sure unless one of us asks, won't we?"

Sheldon stared at her, eyes wider than before, and she stole a quick glance at him, the smirk still on her face. He slowly turned his head away from her, settling back against his seat as his stomach tightened, greedily swallowing up any last bit of confidence he may have had up until now. He needed a new plan.

"You know what?" he said. "I believe you might have the right idea. It may seem far-fetched, but I don't care. Tonight, I'm going to prove to Amy that I'm the more desirable mate for her."

"So, which exhibit would you like to see first?" David asked as Amy excitedly flipped through a pamphlet that contained all the information.

"Gosh, I don't know," she said, scanning the names of the various exhibits. "They all sound really interesting. Of course, I'm impartial to biology and neuroscience, but look, there's computer science, meteorology, astrophysics, experimental physics, theoretical phys…" Her voice trailed off, as she couldn't help but recall that theoretical physics just so happened to be the scientific field in which…he studied. An intense heat rushed to her face at the mere thought of him.

No, she thought, scolding herself. Forget about him. You're here with your boyfriend tonight. Sheldon should be the last person on your mind.

She looked up at David. "I think I'd like to check out the physics stuff first," she said in spite of herself.

"Okay," he said, and held up his hand. "Lead the way."

Amy gave him a small grin as she fell in tow with him, heading towards the physics section of the museum. There weren't many people there tonight, likely because it was a Monday night, but Amy preferred it that way. Less crowds meant more focus on science, and that was really all she cared about.

As for David, he hadn't exactly been interested when she suggested they'd go here tonight, but she'd come to find that he was surprisingly easy to persuade. Within no time, she'd managed to change his mind, and he'd agreed to accompany her.

The physics area was filled with historical knowledge of well-known physicists and even contained replicas of their many discoveries and inventions. David wrapped an arm around Amy's shoulders, and she immediately stiffened. When he glanced at her, though, she forced herself to relax against him, even giving him a smile. Baby steps, she reminded herself.

"Oh, look," she said, pointing to one of the exhibits up ahead. "Marie Curie."

"Right, she worked with radioactivity," David said.

"She did more than just that. Her work with uranium rays led to the revolutionary discovery that atoms were not, in fact, invisible, as had been the previous assumption amongst the scientific community during that time. As a matter of fact, her innovative research on radiation led to her becoming the first female physicist to ever win a Nobel Prize."

Amy nearly stopped breathing in that moment. Sheldon? It couldn't be him. She must've been going crazy. Still, that didn't stop her from turning around, deliberately pulling herself out of David's grasp. She didn't even care. Nothing else seemed to matter when she locked eyes with none other than her new, secret object of affection.

Although, as it turned out, he wasn't alone.

Standing beside him with an arm wrapped around his elbow was a petite blonde woman. The height difference between them was astonishing, yet what was even more astonishing was the fact that he was even here. With a woman.

Who on earth are you?

Searing hot anger rushed throughout Amy's entire body, bringing an entirely new wave of heat to her face. She stared directly at the woman, who smiled at her as she brought up a free hand, lightly tapping Sheldon's arm once. He flinched from the contact, but he looked down at her to meet her gaze.

"Sheldon," she said, her voice the pitch of a mouse's squeak. "Aren't you going to introduce me?"

They stared at one another for a brief moment, when Sheldon's eyes widened. "Oh. Yes." He cleared his throat and looked at Amy, whose anger momentarily subsided as he addressed her. "First of all, it's nice to see you again, Dr. Fowler. What a coincidence we'd run into each other here. Allow me to introduce you to my dear friend and recent romantic partner, Dr. Bernadette Rostenkowski."

Amy was motionless on the outside, her body completely numb with shock, all the while her mind was in a whirlwind of absolute chaos. None of this made any sense. Either Penny had lied to her about Sheldon's seemingly asexual nature, which she knew was highly unlikely, or he'd somehow transformed into any other normal, lust-driven man with physical desires over the span of three days since she'd last seen him.

The latter scenario seemed even more unlikely, given everything Amy had come to learn from all her interactions with Sheldon. And yet, here he was, in the company of this moderately attractive woman, who apparently was his…girlfriend?

The jealousy Amy felt in that moment was so intense she frankly couldn't even trick herself into pretending it was any other emotion. She knew she had no right to feel like this, for she barely even knew Sheldon that well, apparently even less so now than she'd previously thought. Not to mention, she had a boyfriend of her own.

Oh, crap, she thought, finally stealing a glance at David to see him standing there, jaw clenched, as though physically restraining his anger. Her eyes widened at the sight of him silently fuming. She needed to diffuse the situation as quickly as possible.

"David," she said, bringing up her hand and gently touching his back, in hopes that the physical gesture would calm him down. While he didn't move away from her, he unfortunately looked more perturbed than ever, his eyes staying on Sheldon. She knew David had to remember him from their unpleasant exchange at the movie theater weeks ago, because, well, how could anyone not remember a bizarre encounter like that? Still, she knew she needed to explain.

"This is Dr. Sheldon Cooper. I met him personally through his friend, Penny. She and I met while I was waiting for you to arrive that night we had dinner at the Cheescake Factory. I know it may not make much sense to you, considering how he behaved the first time we met him, but as it turns out, he and I actually have quite a lot in common, and we've become acquaintances now."

David was still staring Sheldon down, his eyes narrowing slightly, like he was trying to figure him out, or maybe threaten him with mere eye contact. Either way, it was disconcerting, and Amy's heartbeat quickened. She didn't know what to do here. David wasn't budging, his lips pressed in a hard line. She frowned and slipped her hand off of his back, and it was only then that David finally looked at her.

"You mean to tell me you're actually friends with this nut job?" he asked.

"Excuse me," Sheldon said. "Just who do you think you are to blatantly insult me like that when I'm standing right here, you ignorant little—"

"Sheldon," his short companion said, her voice loud and sing-song. When he looked at her, she raised her eyebrows and lowered her chin so that her eyes peeked out over the top rims of her glasses. "Play nice."

She held the stern gaze, and Sheldon finally sighed.

"Okay," he muttered.

Amy just stared. What the hell is going on here?

"Sheldon," she said at last, and though she felt all three of them look at her, she only kept her gaze on him. "It's great to see you again. And it's so nice to meet you, Dr. Rostenkowski."

She waved a hand. "Oh, please. Call me Bernadette."

"All right," Amy said. "And this is my boyfriend, David Drescoll."

"Nice to meet you," Bernadette said, offering him the hand that wasn't clasped around Sheldon's arm.

As David reached out and accepted her handshake, Amy looked back up to see Sheldon staring at her, his gaze cutting right through her. She felt tingles roll through her body in a powerful wave that caused her stomach to flop.

I'm in trouble here.

"So, Amy, should we maybe…move along to another exhibit now?" David asked.

It took her a moment to realize what he was trying to ask without having to say it directly. She was just so distracted by Sheldon's penetrating gaze, and she couldn't help but sense that something was definitely not adding up here.

"Um," she said, her gaze lingering on Sheldon a bit longer, until she finally forced herself to look away and meet David's eyes. She felt so lightheaded all of a sudden that she couldn't even think straight. "Okay. How about…" She awkwardly fumbled with the pamphlet in her hands, opening it and briefly looking it over, before she found something that caught her interest. "Microbiology."

"Oh, my, another coincidence," Sheldon said, and Amy looked up at him to see him grinning almost too widely, immediately raising her curiosity. "That just so happens to be Bernadette's main field of study."

"It sure is," Bernadette said proudly. "In fact, I'd be happy to share some fun tidbits with you two, if you'd allow us to join you."

Amy glanced between the two of them, observing their intertwined arms and forced smiles. There was definitely something strange going on here. She narrowed her eyes, determined to figure out what it was.

"Do you mind, David?" she asked, looking at him.

He stared at her a moment, only to let out a hard sigh. "Sure. If it'll make you happy."

She reflexively glanced back at Sheldon, taking in his wicked grin, and she felt a smirk of her own coming on. Oh, yes, she was definitely going to get to the bottom of this.

The four of them spent the next hour and a half touring the entire museum together. Sheldon quickly proved himself to be the most knowledgeable and, therefore, the most talkative of the group. He had a fact to share about every scientist, every theory and every revolutionary discovery.

Amy was positively enthralled.

She listened eagerly to his detailed speeches, and occasionally she'd add an interesting fact of her own. Sheldon would pause, taking in the information, before nodding appreciatively and mentioning how that was, indeed, a noteworthy point. The two of them were so deeply wrapped up in conversation that Amy had forgotten all about Bernadette and even poor David, who stood idly by, masking his silent irritation with a wall of thinning patience.

Every once in a while, though, Amy would glance at David and catch a hint of a scowl on his face, just before he'd catch himself and smile uneasily at her. There was a part of her that felt a little guilty, although it was miniscule, because after all, he was the one who'd agreed to let them tag along. She didn't have to feel guilty for enjoying herself tonight.

And she was definitely enjoying herself. Probably a little more than she should be.

"You really are quite the genius, Dr. Cooper," Amy said toward the end of the night.

"That isn't news to me," Sheldon said, walking alongside her. How they'd managed to break away from their significant others so they could walk together was beyond her. "Although, having someone with such a keen intellect as yourself point it out makes it much more meaningful, so thank you, Dr. Fowler."

Amy grinned at him. They'd gone through every single one of the exhibits and had ended up back where they'd originally started. She figured they would all have to part ways now, which she found unfortunate, as she didn't want the night to end just yet. Upon glancing over at David, though, she could see that he was more than ready to call it a night, and she decided that she had no other choice. Finally, her guilt won.

"Well, we should probably get going now," Amy said reluctantly. "I just have to use the restroom first."

"Ooh, me too," Bernadette said. "I'll go with you." She walked up to Sheldon and smiled at him in a sickeningly sweet way. "We'll be back in a few minutes," she added, and winked at him.

It took all the strength Amy had to keep her jaw from dropping to the ground.

There was a moment in which Sheldon didn't respond at all, and instead just stared at Bernadette, as though lost. Suddenly, however, he raised his eyebrows and opened his mouth, before answering, "Oh. Yes. Very good."

Amy looked between the two of them, catching yet another sinful smile on Bernadette's face. She subconsciously clutched the strap of her purse, so tightly that the leather dug sharply into her skin.

"So, Amy, you and David make an awfully cute couple," Bernadette said as she turned on the faucet to wash her hands. "Have you guys been dating long?"

Amy did the same, standing beside her and looking at her through the large rectangular mirror that hung above the sinks. She absentmindedly watched as Bernadette lathered up her hands with liquid soap. It wasn't until Bernadette looked up at her again that Amy realized she was waiting for her to respond.

Still, she couldn't help but notice that the way Bernadette was looking at her was anything but innocent. In fact, Amy could see a hint of a smirk playing at her lips, and she had to restrain herself from narrowing her eyes at the tiny blonde, as if to challenge her. Two could play at this game.

"Thank you. And no, our relationship is still fairly new," she said, purposely being vague with her answer. She turned off the faucet and reached for a paper towel to dry her hands. As they both fell silent, she decided to use it to her advantage and steer the conversation in another direction. "Anyway, you and Sheldon certainly make an…interesting pair. How long have you two been seeing each other?"

"Oh, you know. Not very long, either. It's just casual. Nothing too serious," Bernadette said a bit hastily, which Amy found suspicious, especially when she promptly looked down and started shaking out her wet hands, water dripping everywhere.

Seeing that she was struggling, Amy ripped out another paper towel from the dispenser and handed it to her.

"Thanks," Bernadette said.

"You're welcome," Amy replied.

Another awkward silence fell between them as they each focused on drying off their hands and discarding their wet paper towels.

"So," Bernadette said, the slyness returning, "tell me more about your boyfriend. Is he romantic?"

Amy stared at her carefully, wondering why she was so adamant on learning more about her relationship with David. She wasn't sure if Bernadette was simply asking out of curiosity, or if there was something else behind it.

"He's wonderful," Amy said, though again, she was determined to take the attention off of her, and she allowed her own curiosity to fuel her. "How's Sheldon as a…romantic partner?"

"Oh, he's the best. Really knows how to treat a girl right," Bernadette said, her voice once again full of haste. She started heading for the door.

"That's nice," Amy said as she followed her, feeling her heart sink a little.

"Yup, it is," Bernadette said, and just as she reached the door, she stopped. "You know, I probably shouldn't say this, but…you and Sheldon seem to make a really cute pair, too."

Amy's heart jumped back up. "Excuse me?"

Bernadette shrugged, entirely calm all of a sudden. "Well, it's just, the way you two were talking to each other all night, it almost makes me wonder if there's something more to your friendship. You clearly have more of a connection with Sheldon than you do with David."

Amy said nothing, although her nerves were pounding away. Is it really that transparent?

"Maybe you should consider…giving Sheldon a chance."

As Amy took in the teasing look on Bernadette's face, any remaining trace of jealousy or confusion melted away. It all began to make sense to her, the personal questions about her relationship with David, the stealthy looks and cunning smiles between Sheldon and Bernadette…

It was all his doing.

Amy almost smiled. "You're not really dating Sheldon at all, are you?"

Sheldon stood tall, his hands clasped in front of his waist, while David stood near him, anxiously looking at his watch every thirty seconds. The two men hadn't said a word to each other since Amy and Bernadette excused themselves to use the ladies' room. Truthfully, there was nothing Sheldon wished to discuss with David at all, as he knew Bernadette was doing all the dirty work for him. She'd insisted on it, and in fact, seemed quite a bit eager to do it.

All he could do now was wait in a rather uncomfortable silence. It was a small price to pay, though, as he'd been more than pleased with the events of this evening. In fact, after tonight, he couldn't help but admit to himself that Amy truly was the most captivating woman he'd ever met.

"You and Amy seem to get along really well," David said.

Sheldon glanced over at him. He'd been fine with the uncomfortable silence, but apparently David had other plans. He took a moment to simply take in the shorter man, noting that he was roughly the same height as Leonard.

"Indeed," he finally said with a curt nod, and he immediately fell silent again, as he had no interest in pursuing a conversation with a man he didn't care for.

"I just find it hard to believe that the two of you are friends now, considering how rude you were to Amy when we first met you," David said. "Do you remember that?"

Sheldon's eyebrow twitched. "Yes, of course I remember," he said. "It wasn't that long ago. Are you attempting to patronize me?"

"No, absolutely not," David said, though something in his tone led Sheldon to believe that he was not being sincere. "I was just making an observation. Amy never told me that the two of you had become friends. I guess it's a good thing."

That immediately caught Sheldon's interest.

"Well, I assure you, we are definitely friends. She even accepted my friend request on Facebook."

"Huh," David said. "You know, I'm not really much of a fan of those social networking sites. I do have a Facebook account, but I hardly ever use it. Amy likes it, though."

"I know," Sheldon said, perhaps too quickly, as David's countenance suddenly hardened again.

"Anyway," David said, his tone decisive and calculating. "You're dating that woman, Bernadette?"

Sheldon swallowed, realizing that this conversation was heading down a dangerous road, but he kept his gaze steady.

"More or less," he said.

"I just find it strange that you spent the whole night talking to my girlfriend," David said. "That's a little…abnormal, don't you think?"

"I fail to see what's so abnormal about that," Sheldon said, his temper beginning to stray from him. "Amy and I were simply discussing science, a topic in which we share a deep interest, as we both have careers in our respective fields of physics and neurobiology. The fact that you would find that peculiar seems to reflect your own personal insecurities concerning your relationship with Amy."

David's eyebrows flew up in surprise, and right at that moment, Sheldon found himself holding back a smirk, knowing he'd just earned the upper hand. He never should've doubted himself. When it came to mental dexterity, nobody was a match for Sheldon Cooper.

"We're back," Bernadette said. The timing couldn't have been better.

"Great," David said almost too eagerly. He walked past Sheldon to meet Amy as she and Bernadette approached them. Sheldon watched the scene play out before him, feeling his skin prickle when David ran his hand down the length of Amy's back. "Ready to go, sweetheart?"

She gave him a smile. "Yes. Thank you for being so patient. Just one more moment."

When she looked at Sheldon, he felt his breath hitch, lodging itself in the back of his throat. His stomach twisted again, the sensation powerful and sudden, though it wasn't painful, like a stomachache. Instead, it was a tickling sensation. Butterflies. He saw a smirk slide over Amy's face, and the feeling only intensified as she walked up to him, tilting her chin up.

"I'm onto you, Sheldon Cooper," she said, her voice such a delicate whisper that it caused all the blood to drain from his face, and he shivered hard.

Well…perhaps there was a match after all.