Remember the words you told me, love me 'til the day I die
Surrender my everything 'cause you made me believe you're mine
Yeah, you used to call me baby, now you calling me by name

You push and you push and I'm pulling away
Pulling away from you
I give and I give and I give and you take, give and you take

Youngblood, by 5 Seconds of Summer, from the album Youngblood, released in 2018

"She's not lying Carlisle- I don't know why but I can feel her emotions again. She's bein' honest."

I'm under the impression that I wasn't supposed to hear that. Got to love the enhanced wolf hearing- it certainly did come back in handy. I quickly re-wrapped myself in my shield, with it happily covering my own mind, locking off my emotions once more. I hoped to get to the bottom of why they were here, especially considering that they didn't seem to be aware of Edward attacking me.

I guess that provided some sort of leeway with their actions, especially regarding leaving me by myself, but even if Edward hadn't done what he did, they still would have left me all by myself. Which wasn't right, regardless of anything else.

"What do you mean by Edward attacked you, Sweetheart?"

Esme's kindly voice separated the discussion the two men were having with ease, and it was then that I realised that her golden eyes had dimmed to onyx. She was clearly angry at something, but it was practically impossible for me to tell who it was directed at. Upon scanning over all of the Cullens, I watched each of their reactions. Rosalie's face had narrowed into a half-snarl, whereas Emmett was looking dismayed at something.

The scowl on Rose's face was nothing new to me, having become accustomed to it, but the expression on Emmett's face was foreign. The happy go lucky, competitive, jokey vampire I knew, almost seemed sullen, weary, and tired. It was a strange expression to see on a vampire, even stranger to see on him. Esme's darkened eyes seemed to be shining in the little light, and they seemed to be filled with venom. It looked like she was about to cry, if that was even possible for the vampires.

Carlisle's face was similar to Esme's, except he didn't have venom-filled eyes. Alice was tense, her small form leaning heavily into Jasper's as she looked shocked, and apologetic, rolled into one. Jasper's face was impassive, neutral, and impossible to see whatever emotion was under there. There was one thing in common between the family- all of their eyes were a deep onyx, and not the colour they went when they were hungry. Ignoring the term of endearment from Esme, I finally replied.

"You first. Why are you here? What do you seek from me?"

That came out far more formal then I had intended. 'Seek' Bella, Really? It sounds old-englishy. To my surprise, they seemed pretty willing to talk about whatever they had come to see me about, especially in front of the pack, who had edged closer and closer as we began to speak.

Jake was leaning into my side heavily, his heavy form being a comfort, and Sam was next to me, standing on the pack's behalf. So far, they hadn't noticed one of the wolves slink off, (aka, Bella wolf) which was working to my advantage.

"We came here to inform you about Edward."

Jasper began in his southern drawl, moving in front of Carlisle, and eliciting a growl from Jake. I could feel Jasper try to project calm as he walked forward (still staying on their side of the treaty line), but using my shield I nudged it to the side. Figuratively, of course. If he was surprised it had no effect, he didn't let it show. Not that I was surprised, because I'd imagine that in the army one had to get used to hiding emotions.

"Back millions of years ago, before the existence of vampires was obscured from the general populous, the humans gathered together with their primitive technology, and attempted to create something that would cull the population of vampires."

It seemed a bit off topic that they would bring in this little tale. There had to be some correlation between this and Edward, but I wasn't sure what. Judging by the confusion through the bond, Jacob didn't have any idea either. Sam nodded, gesturing for them to continue. I was beginning to get antsy standing here, and as much as I wanted my answers I could tell Charlie would want to see me soon.

"After years of experimenting, and managing to keep the investigation a secret, they managed to come up with something that would affect a vampire. It was a virus, something made to systematically attack us, disable us, and eventually kill us. But it didn't work as intended: rather, it caused mania and heightened aggression, and it twisted our perception into something that it wasn't."

That did sound horrible, for lack of a better word. Rather then jumping in with what I was slowly beginning to put together, I waited for extra information, hoping that perhaps I was wrong. Because if I was right...what kind of person would it make me?

"But there was another flaw- it only affected certain vampires. Many of the population could walk around those who were infected, yet remain unaffected themselves. The unaffected killed the effected, thus dooming the virus to be but a myth.."

Okay, perhaps I was wrong? During my inner monologue, my wolf silent and my mind being the only thing in debate, Sam took over from my outer silence. I gave him credit, he was calmer then I could ever be right about now.

"What has this got to do with mind-reader-leech?"

The burning question. Or rather, the glittering question. When did I become so jokey- probably since I started hanging out with the pack. They were a bad influence. Let's not tell Charlie that though, otherwise I get to witness him trying to shoot a werewolf- several werewolves in fact- and I'd rather not expose him to that particular secret just yet. Or ever, if I could help it.

With him- and these were his words, not mine- Less is more. Of course, that was in regards to mother nature, and not in the regards to supernatural secrets, but still, the concept applies, right? Alice crossed her arms, still scowling a little bit, but had managed to pick up somewhat, vibrating with the energy she used for shopping. Let's not tell her that I need a new wardrobe.

Not that I particularly wanted to go with her anyway, but I'd probably get dragged. And if I got dragged, I'd have to explain why I needed new clothes, and she would probably smell my new scent- not to mention my own nose burning- and okay, wow, that was a slippery slope fallacy if I've ever seen one.

I blame RE for that...even if I haven't been back to school in..fuck it's been well over a week. My holiday was only a week! How has Charlie not mentioned this to me yet?! Taking a breath in, I forced myself to calm down, grateful that my wolf was masking my tremors and that Jasper couldn't sense my emotions.

"The virus re-emerged, centuries later, out of no discernible reason. By this time, the existence of Vampires had been shrouded over, so the humans could not be put at fault. As the virus surged from host to host, carrier to carrier, groups of the immune worked to find a cure. And that, they did. Using several of the captured infected, they managed to synthesise a cure, but they found out something crucial. In order for the cure to be effective, it had to be synthesised using the blood of the specific vampires la tua cantante. Singer. Only the potency of their blood was enough to attack the virus and bat it back, The other ingredients were easy enough to obtain at that time- the blood of a werewolf.."

That elicited a loud snarl from the pack, who were evidently not very impressed at that fact. It took all that I had to mask my own snarl with a throaty cough, faking a coughing fit. As a human I was liable to colds- so if they asked, that was my excuse. I was hardly the healthiest person back before I got the wolf immune system.

I didn't like the idea, in the past or not, gaining the blood from a..brother or sister of mine, if you can consider them as such. My stomach plummeted as I slowly realised what Carlisle was saying, and I began to think that maybe I had been correct in my previous assumption.

"...not your pack. Children of the Moon. Those who change under the influence of the moon. Continuing on,"

Carlisle moved swiftly on upon seeing the not appeased faces of the pack. The two species, despite being different, were incredibly similar, both sharing the form of the wolf. They were like cousins. The odd, estranged cousins of a family. Although, I was fairly certain that nobody in the pack had actually come across the Children of the Moon, but like I said, estranged.

"They needed the blood, because they needed it's properties to allow the Vampire's natural venom to fight off the virus. A werewolves blood is the closest thing to our own venom, easily being equals to one another. The third thing they needed was the ground version of hawthorn. While some myths suggest that it is incredibly poisonous to us, it is not the case. Like most things, upon ingestion, it causes no serious effects. However, a side effect of it is that it can thin our venom, sort of like an anticoagulant."

Upon a synchronised blink, from both the pack and Emmett (because apparently he hadn't taken a medical degree..then again I think I would be terrified if Emmett was my doctor), Carlisle expanded upon his statement. Which was probably for the best, otherwise we would have no chance of following.

"Blood thinner. A drug which thins the blood and stops clotting. In our case, it weakens our venom slightly, that while it sounds counter-intuitive, it actually weakens the virus as a consequence. The last thing they had needed was vampire ash. It was something to do with them believing that when a Vampire is burnt, the strength of that vampire is immortalised in their ash."

I'm now feeling incredibly disgusted. And also more knowledgeable about a nearly extinct vampire disease then I ever wanted to be. That was like..vampire cannibalism. Eugh.. Moving swiftly on, the long winded conversation seemed to be drawing to a close, and it left me none the bloody wiser. Or rather, it might have. But the Cullens apparently weren't going with the 'long story short' explanation.

"The only downside, was that the virus had to be cured by the next Bloodmoon, a total lunar eclipse that belongs to a tetrad of total lunar eclipses. It is named as such, because it not only is red in colour, but it was associated with giving Vampires unbelievable power: another myth. But something about what the Bloodmoon emits enhances the virus..thus making it incurable."

"It's a good story and all,"

I began, gritting my teeth in an attempt to hide the brimming growl. This had to end soon, otherwise there was going to be a large (yet small when compared to the others) and shaggy wolf standing next to Sam.

I could almost feel the stinging of the healed wounds littering my body, and the unbridled rage threatened to erupt out of me once more. My knuckles were clenched so tightly that I wouldn't be surprised to find blood- on second thought, that would be a very bad thing to happen.

"But what has this got to do with Edward? You said that it had been doomed to a myth, and a cure had been created for the second incarnation."

Deciding that drawing blood in a clearing filled with vampires was a spectacularly bad idea, I unclenched them, before gathering a tuft of Jacob's russet fur. Keeping his eyes on the Cullens, I could sense him push comfort through our bond. But, I could also sense an underlying fear.

I ran my hands from head to his lower back, trying to assure him to the best of my ability. I made a note to talk to him later about it- because while such worry was not unusual for Jacob, especially after the vampire scare, I had a feeling that it was due to something else.

"The virus..recently resurfaced. It manifested itself in Edward."

Annnnddd shit. I wasn't sure how to feel. Some part of me, that I would like to label 'vindictive Bella' felt some sort of pleasure that he was suffering, like he had made me suffer. I didn't listen to that part of my mind very often, for a very good reason. Because I would likely be a sociopath if I did. My wolf still felt the embers of anger smouldering, but also seemed..impassive.

Like..she didn't really care. If she was a reflection of me, then did that mean a part of me just didn't care about the Cullens any more? I guess it was pretty accurate.. in the sense that I had no idea how to feel. I was conflicted. Does it make me a bad person if I was still angry at him? Even though he was ill?

"The day he left you behind in the forest,"

Alice began, speaking for one of the first times that it wasn't just directed at me. My hand froze from where it was in Jacob's fur, and he let out a warning growl as he moved to cover the front of my legs. Blinking quickly, and forcing myself to slowly unclench my hand. I didn't want to hurt Jacob after all.

"Was the day we realised that something had happened. Upon Edward not returning that evening, and his strange behaviour becoming more evident, we immediately left to try and determine what was wrong with him- and/or find him."

This time, I couldn't stop the tremors from emerging. I was just hoping they'd put it down to nerves. Sam put a hand on my shoulder, as I concentrated hard on not losing it. Fury was seething through my bones, my wolf pacing and snarling, and I was trying desperately trying to hold my form. They didn't think to tell me that they were leaving? Or, I don't know, check that I was okay before they left? Especially if they had suspicion that something was wrong?

Even without Edward, there was six of them- surely one of them had time to inform the 'puny human' that they were leaving, to be wary of Edward? Apparently I meant less to them then I thought. And that realisation hurt. I could sense Jasper pulsing out more calm which I ignored, and Jacob was nudging my legs with a gentle force. Both Carlisle and Esme were looking at me with a degree of concern, which, let me tell you, wasn't doing good for my temper.

Here's a fun fact, when a wolf (me in this case) gets heat up, and we start to tremble, it isn't because our wolves are trying to take control but as a result of too much emotion, which causes the wolf instincts and the human instincts to go to war with one another. Well, I guess I don't know that for sure, but I was willing to go by what my wolf said.

"So, why did you come back now then? You seemed perfectly happy to just leave me here by myself, without any warning! You don't need the human's help, do you!?"

As if on cue, my form began to waver even more violently. I was getting the feeling that my secret wouldn't be quite so secret any more. A crooning noise was coming from in front of me, and I realised it was coming from Jacob. It was kind of like a song, low and warbling, yet there was no sense of anger or fury. It was..calming, but not to the extent that I could stop from shaking.

Sam looked like he was debating whether to put an injunction on me, as his hand tensed on my shoulder. I was trying so damn hard to not phase, but the Cullens were just making me more and more mad with every excuse or lack there of they gave.

"Bella. Calm down."

He muttered the injunction under his breath, trying to make it as subtle as possible. The command reverberated round my ear drums, echoing and bouncing around. Any growl growing in my throat abruptly cut off, and my trembling ceased a little bit. Not enough that my form completely stabilised, but enough that I wasn't flickering dangerously between wolf and human. Judging by the Cullen's faces (shock, confusion, and most of all, scepticism) they had noticed either the power behind Sam's words, or at the very least, the conspicuous shaking.

"Bella.."

"Tell me, to my face, that you didn't just come back because you needed my help."

The trailing silence was all that I needed to know. Whatever was left of my heart, shattered into teeny tiny pieces. Esme looked at me with pity, Carlisle looked almost ashamed, Jasper impassive, Alice seemed dismayed, Emmett was quiet and perturbed, and Rose just had a snarl in her face.

My shaking picked up once again, and this time, perhaps sensing the inevitability, Sam and Jacob stepped away from me, as I could audibly hear Esme asking me what was wrong. My form shattered in a violent flash, and with a quick, anger fuelled phase, I became adorned with my signature fur and quadrupedal form.

Not looking back, I snarled at the Cullen's, lip curling up and ears pressed back, before I turned on my heel and sprinted off, my wolf easily taking the reins, as I enveloped myself in the comfort of my own mind, free from the torment they had brought on to me. In the background, I could hear Sam hiss at them something along the lines of 'This is what your son did to her!'.

Concentrating further my wolf could hear someone running up behind us. My wolf turned our head sharply and growled viciously, fully prepared to tear a chuck out of whoever it was, but it was just Jacob. He didn't make any noise, nor did he flip in submission, but she acquiesced and allowed him to continue following us.

Soon we were on top of the cliffs, where we sat on her haunches and threw our head back in a vengeful howl, nothing like the joy filled one we had experienced during our imprint ceremony.

Jacob sat back on his own haunches and joined in, the sharp and bitter tone cutting through the forest and warning all who were near to not come into our territory. For now, I didn't give two flying fucks about the consequences of phasing in front of them, because my anger was still burning furiously like a fire.

"Mine."

Both me and my wolf rumbled together in synchrony, as Jacob stood tall and proud next to me, his fur bristling. He ran his tongue through my-our fur, flattening it down from where it had been raised, and was covering me in his scent.

"Yours."

He agreed, in between licks. It was then I learnt that no matter what the Cullens did to me, Jake would always be here for me. He was my friend. My imprint. My other hand. And after all of the events that had occurred today? I was no longer scared of moving on.

Author's Note

Sooooo...Bella thinks that despite everything, she's received some closure about Edward. Even if it wasn't news she wanted to hear.

Now we're really moving into the plot- hehehe. And we'll see the rest of what was said after Bella left. And perhaps, the Cullens feeling a little bit bad about leaving Bella out of the loop.

So how is every one? I'm still full of the cold, but I'm feeling pretty okay. Gotta love this 'affa fine weather.' Wait, no, wrong place and dialect. Heh. Oops. That was Yorkshire..not Scotland...

And for all who celebrate it, happy Pride Month! I haven't done much to celebrate it myself, but I believe in what they do, as a bisexual myself. Feel free to talk about it with me if you'd like!

Here's this weeks question. What is everyone's favourite sport/instrument/school subject/video game. If you can't tell by the '/' that's me trying to make the question accessible to everyone. Feel free to answer all of them, just one, or none at all.

My answers are, in order, football, drum kit, computing science, and Spider-Man PS4.

This author's note is far, far too close to becoming a chapter all in itself, so I'm going to reign in my babble and cut it off here.

See you next time!

~Cait