AN: Edward is torn between two lovers and feeling like an asshole and he also feels like a ping pong ball and his two loves are the paddles.
I couldn't wait for you Chap.11
Edward was sitting on the porch drinking coffee when Al exited the house and Edward noticed the permanent smile on his brother's face. "Heeey Al what's got you so happy?"
Al sat down on the steps and turned to his older sibling not knowing how Ed was going to react to him boinking his student. After a couple of minutes of awkward silence Al looked at him "I did it brother."
Edward not knowing what the hell he meant gave him a confused look "Did what?"
A huge smile crossed Al's face "I finally got laid." Edward almost spit the coffee in his mouth out as he choked on what was in his throat. After he got that under control he looked at Al stunned his brother would say that "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"
"It was Aiden, she was an animal Ed." Edward's eyes widened as he stepped forward "You screwed my student?" Al lowered his head "Not exactly brother."
Throwing his hands in the air and frantically raging "WHAT THE HELL WOULD YOU CALL IT THEN?"
Al looked up at him and smiled another huge smile "Voluntary and willing rape." Edward frowned and sarcastically said "It can't be rape if your partner's willing Al."
Al smiled a sly smile and gazing at his brother out of the corner of his eye "Ooooo I was very willing." As Edward's mouth hit the ground he shook his head "AHHHH" then he calmed down realizing that they must have something special and he actually had no room at this particular moment to judge anyone with the situation he was in so he put his hand on Al's shoulder "Congratulations little brother welcome to manhood."
Envy walked out of the house "Hey what the hell are you two vile creatures talking about?'' Edward related to that statement because in his present situation he felt like a vile creature with no conscious at all. On one hand he had a sweet submitting wife, well she was his wife till they came back. But on the other hand he had a messed up in the head sex goddess that he was enjoying. 'I have to figure this out. I don't fucking know what to do and at this point I really can't choose between them because I love them both with all my heart.' He knew he was screwed and he didn't mean literally how was he suppose too choose between them when he loved each one differently.
He looked at Envy and Al "I'm going for a walk I need to clear my head." They both nodded knowing he was having a difficult time and they knew his head was fucked completely up. As he walked he tried to weigh the pros and cons of both women. 'Noah is kind, sweet and understanding and her gorgeous dark skin and brown eyes make me melt. But Winry, with her fire, passion and big blue eyes knows me better than I know myself and everytime I'm with her my heart skips a beat. AHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO?' he kicked a rock and watched it fly across the road 'I can't lose either one of them and I defiantly can't choose between them. IM SCREWED!' Sticking his hands in his pockets he walked around for what seemed like hours just trying to straighten his head out but everytime he did something would pop into it and screw his logical thinking up he finally came to a decision 'You're screwed Elric. If you can't make a choice you're going to lose both of them.' He knew one thing for sure he had to make a trip to Central to talk to Noah face to face and find out what the fuck she was talking about and have her explain it to him. "What the hell did she see in that vision?" He asked himself walking back to the house and realizing his head was pounding at this point he decided not to think about anything right now.
He felt a little disconnected for the next seven weeks as he just went through the motions of the day. Winry hadn't had a drink in those weeks and she looked a hell of a lot better. He had to tell her he'd made up his mind to make a trip to Central because he needed to talk to Noah. He didn't know if leaving her by herself was a good idea but then again there was a house full of people to watch her.
That evening the phone rang and it was Mustang calling for Al. He needed help with this girl destroying towns so he wanted Al and Envy to help seeing how Envy was a homunculus.
"I know your brother doesn't want to talk to me right now so I'm asking for your guys' help." Mustang knew if he got Al and Envy on board it wouldn't be long before Edward followed not wanting to let his brothers get in a tight jam.
Edward overheard Al's side of the conversation and figured he could go to Central, Kick Mustang's ass, Talk to Noah, Take the mission and find the girl all in one trip.
"Tell that asshole we're all coming and I'm not going to be pleasant when I get there." Edward said walking past Al visualizing kicking Mustang's ass as he smiled.
"Did you hear him General?" Al said smiling at Edward and imagining what was going through his head.
"Uh, Yes I did Al and tell that obnoxious brat I'll be waiting for him." As Mustang hung the phone up he smiled a slight smile as he turned to Hawkeye "I knew he wouldn't let them come alone."
She gave him a slight grin "Are you're sure it's not that he just wants to kick your ass?" Turning to walk to the door she said over her shoulder "You did completely fuck his life up." Mustang didn't get to answer her before she was out the door so he just groaned to himself and realized he'd better be on guard the whole time Edward was there.
Winry wasn't really sure about how she felt about Edward going. She didn't mind him going to see Noah she just didn't like the idea of him not supervising her every day. So he came up with an idea that would keep her busy and she could spend time with Edala at the same time. He taught her some meditation moves and a few martial arts moves and he told her that if she had a thought about drinking to go out in the yard and take Edala and do them, twice if she had to.
She thought that was an awesome idea and she liked the idea of learning martial arts. He told her when he got back he'd teach her more and pretty soon she'd learn everything he taught Noah and she liked that idea even better. Then at least if Noah wanted to kick her ass it would be a fair fight.
"Edward what are you going to do about me and Noah?" she asked as they sat on the porch "Didn't she tell you to make a choice?"
He turned to her and slightly smiled "Listen Winry I have got a huge problem." Looking out towards the countryside he sighed "I love you both with all my heart, it's a hard decision for me. That's why I want to talk to her about this vision she had. She won't tell me shit she keeps saying I'll figure it out."
Winry stood up and walked over behind him and put her arms around his stomach and laid her head on his back "Well Edward it seems you've already figured it out and didn't she tell you you weren't married by a priest and she gave your ring back." She gripped him tighter as he caressed her arm and she sighed "To tell you the truth I don't mind sharing you at all."
He chuckled at that "That's good to know Winry." He then turned around and pulled her into a hug "I do love you and never forget that." Smiling she looked at him "I love you too Edward." He knew this choice wasn't going to be easy he had eight years with Noah and two children and that seemed like where he needed to stay and he knew it would be hard on Winry especially after what had happened between them and he didn't want to hurt her or drive her back to drinking so he thought he'd wait till he got back to tell her.
That night he fell asleep on the couch and he was awoken by someone coughing outside. As he got up and went outside he saw someone crouched down by the side of the porch and as he got closer "Who's there?" she stood up startled and turned around "Edward did I wake you" She wiped her mouth "I'm sorry."
He was relieved and confused about why she was out there "Winry what are you doing?" he asked looking down at the ground and he could tell she had gotten sick.
"I was out here looking at the stars and I just got a little light-headed then I got sick." She smiled slightly at him as he walked over towards her and put his hand to her head "Have you been feeling bad in the past few weeks?"
She put her hand to his on her head and took it off her head "It comes and goes but it's mostly in the mid-mornings. This is the first time it's happened at night."
After having watched Noah during two pregnancies he knew the signs of morning sickness well, only sometimes it happened at night, usually if you ate late and counting back to their first sexual encounter it had been eight weeks. He had a feeling this was going to complicate his decision. As he stepped forward and pulled her into a hug and placing his hand on her head "Winry I really didn't mean for this to happen."
"What me getting sick? I don't think you could have done anything about it?" She said looking up at him wondering why he said that.
He pushed her back some and looked her straight in the eyes "Yeah I could of, I could have never touched you." He sighed and his eyes dropped and then he looked back at her "Winry I think you might be pregnant."
She pushed him back "No! I-I-can't be." She began to freak out a little knowing how much this would complicate his decision "Edward, w-w-we have to do something."
Being the sarcastic person he was "I think we already did Winry." She pushed him backwards "THIS IS NO TIME TO BE A SMARTASS ED!" tears weld up in her eyes as she stared at him and he flinched "AAAGH" god he hated to see her do that.
"I'm sorry but I promise Winry it'll be okay." He tried to reassure her but she just went off "HOW'S IT GOING TO BE OKAY ED! YOU'RE MARRIED TO ANOTHER WOMAN AND NOW I'M PREGNANT."
He turned his head to the side "Yeah that does cause a problem." Those words cut her to the core and he didn't mean it that way but she screamed and ran into the house crying. 'GREAT! Just fucking great! Way to go you fucking idiot. You just said the wrong fucking thing.' He knew he had to go talk to her thinking she might do something stupid or hate him forever now 'She must think I'm a complete asshole.'
He walked into the house and upstairs to her room where he heard her crying inside as he knocked softly on the door "GO AWAY ED!"
"NO!" he yelled then lowering his voice so he didn't wake everyone up "If you don't open the door I'm going to kick it down." He didn't want her to deal with this herself, this was his doing as much as hers.
She turned the knob and glared at him with tear filled eyes as his head lowered "I'm sorry Winry I didn't mean for it to come out that way." Feeling the need to step in the room he found himself wondering why this was so bad. 'Didn't Noah tell me to save her I had to love her and I did and now she's pregnant? So how is this suppose to help?' He thought as he tried to figure out the right words to talk to her because they hadn't talked very much since he'd gotten back.
Sobbing she turned to him and lowered her head "I-I'm sorry Ed I didn't mean to complicate things for you." His heart sank as he walked over to her and pulled her chin up "You didn't complicate anything Winry, I did." As he leaned in and kissed her lips gently "This is my fault. Like everything has been my fault I just can't seem to do anything right anymore. I'm so fucked up in the head right now with everything that's happened since I've been back."
"I haven't helped the whole situation have I?" she turned and walked to the bed and sat down. He followed her and sat next to her and she looked up terrified "I haven't fucked with your head have I Ed?" Turning to face her on the bed he smiled "Not at all." She breathed a sigh of relief "Good I didn't want to have to deal with Noah breaking my neck."
"The only person that's screwed with my head is me." He said dropping his head into his hands "I don't understand how I could love two women at the same time but yet screw everything up." His eyes widened as he remembered his daughters words that night before they came back through the portal 'Daddy what will you name the baby?' and then she said 'I don't know daddy but I do know it's not yours and mommies.' Crap! He figured out his daughter had Noah's gift and she had seen this coming and this was the baby she was referring too. It was a lot for him to take in and Winry could see the stress on his face "Edward don't worry I'm sure everything will work out."
He decided to spill his guts to her he needed to tell her everything "Winry I really don't know what to do. When I went back to the other side I spent a year searching for you a-and when I found you it was on the front page of a newspaper and you were dead. I don't know what happen to me after that I felt so empty inside like there was a part of me I lost." He sighed then ran his hand though his hair and continued "And that next day with Noah I-I let go of everything that had been hurting" Looking up at her "That included you Winry. I just couldn't feel that hurt because it hurt so fucking bad." As a tear rolled down his cheek "I never truly knew how much I loved you till reading that paper that day." Wiping the tear from his cheek, "Letting go of everything helped me and so did Noah. She knew how much I loved you and she is the reason I'm here right now." He stood up and walked to the window "I just thought it was a sick twist of fate that you were dead on the other side. It was like we were never meant to be then that fucking idiot General had to go and bring me back and it was like everything I'd let go of suddenly came rushing back." Turning to face her he sighed again "Winry I do truly love you but to be honest I don't know what's going to happen. Hell I don't even know who I am anymore I'm so confused by my feelings right now I can't think straight."
Walking over and bending down in front of her he placed his hand on her stomach and giving her a sideways glance he smiled softly "Don't get me wrong I'm happy about the baby and I know I will love this one as much as I love my other two. I will be here for you and him/her no matter what." She could see the confusion and distress in his face and she knew he was having a difficult time because he was torn between two people that he loved dearly and she hated to see him this way and her heart broke for him.
Reaching down she placed her hand under his chin and lifted his face to stare into those golden amber eyes "Edward I know you and I know you will be here as best you can but I don't want this baby to be a burden that holds you to me." She smiled at him "I now have a part of you growing inside me and that's enough for me." She leaned forward and kissed his lips softly as he closed his eyes and it was a lingering soft kiss like a I love you but I know where your heart lies kiss. As she leaned back he opened his eyes slowly to see her looking at him "You don't have to make a decision because I know where you belong and it's not with me. You belong with the woman you been married to for eight years."
He gave her a confused look 'What the fuck! Now she's telling me it's over?' Now he was more screwed up in the head "W-Winry what are you saying?" she took a deep breath and sighed and he could see the tears welding in her eyes but she held them back "I'm saying you need to go home Edward to your family."
He felt so numb all over and he didn't say anything 'No! This isn't what I wanted. I don't want it to end like this. What do I do? WHAT DO I DO?' "B-But Winry-"she put her fingers to his lips "Ssssh, Its okay" she smiled a huge forced smile and he could tell it was fake "I'll be fine Ed." She kissed him again and leaned back "I do love you but I won't have this baby be the reason you stay. So I want you to go downstairs and in the morning I want you to leave. Now can you please leave my room before I regret what I just said."
He didn't know what to say as he stood up completely emotionless and walked to the door. As he got to her door he looked back over his shoulder to see her almost to the point of tears "I love you too Winry and someday, somehow I'm gonna make it right, I promise you that."
The only thing she could force out "Just go Edward." And when he shut the door she completely lost it as her tears fell all that night. He felt such emptiness inside and he didn't know if talking to Noah was the right thing to do right now because his emotions were all over the place and he couldn't even feel anything.