Disclaimer – I do not own Twilight. All recognizable plot and characters belong to the talented Stephanie Meyer.
This story is rated M. Some scenes will be graphic so please if you are under 18 do not read.
Please review.
Sorry about the wait. I'm on a road trip. I'll post when I pick up a signal but it won't be regular until I get home Labour Day weekend. Hope you enjoy.
The next day we all woke up with horrendous hang over's to someone banging on the front door. Whoever the wolf belonged to, we might be forced to hurt him. It wasn't a wolf. It was Jenna.
"You four look like shit." She said coming into the house. "Seth came over last night. I guess he was all freaked out I was going to stop dating him because of you four moving off the reservation."
"What did you tell him?" Emily asked going to the kitchen to make coffee.
We trailed after her and I handed out aspirin while Kim poured tall glasses of water for each of us.
"I told him I thought we should take a break." She said with a sigh. "He started to freak out and shake in the living room. Then when he realized I was actually scared he might phase there, he freaked out more and had to leave. I think he's still to upset to talk because he hasn't come back."
"Where are they?" Emily asked sitting down.
"Angela came by this morning. I guess Quil freaked out and went running to her to but she assured him they were good. She said they are all at your house and it's a real shit show over there. She begged me to tell Seth I didn't mean it. I have a feeling she might head here as well."
"Thanks for the heads up." Holly mumbled pouring cereal into a bowl.
"Eggs" I told her, "We need greasy food. Trust me. Let's go to the diner.
"You're the one who worked in a bar. I'm all for taking your advice on this one." Kim sad, her head buried in her arms.
"Let's get dressed." We took turns showering and then went to the diner for breakfast. Leah was working.
"Well didn't you just butt fuck the bunker with this stunt." Leah said as she ambled over.
"Sorry?"
She rolled her eyes, "All the guys have gone loco because you've got all the imprints leaving their mates."
"Wolves." I corrected her.
"What?"
"All the imprints have left their wolves."
"Is there a difference?" She looked confused from one of us to the other. "Previously Disney movie happy mates are rejecting the imprint."
"We aren't rejecting the imprint." Jenna supplied. "I'll still be here for your brother."
"Right, you just broke up with him."
"Exactly." She nodded.
Leah looked confused, "Em?"
"Yes Leah?"
"Why are you doing this to Sam?"
"Isn't this what you wanted Leah?" She replied with an honest look of confusion on her face.
"Why would I want you to hurt him?"
Emily half smiled though it was a sad look rather than amused. "Like Jenna said. I'm not rejecting the imprint."
"No, just walking out on your husband."
"That was my mistake."
"I thought you were happy."
"You thought wrong."
"Can we get some breakfast?" Holly interrupted the cousins. Emily looked ready to cry. Kim and I each took one of her hands.
Leah ignored her and turned to me, "Why are you doing this? Sam and Jake hurt you, I get it, I do. I've been through the heartbreak but do they really deserve this?"
"I'm not doing anything Leah. I've moved back to Forks for Paul because of this supernatural bond, that's it."
"Yeah except then you left him and what did Jared or Seth ever do to you or do you just want to hurt us all?"
"I am not out to hurt anyone Leah. Like I said, I'm only here because Paul apparently needs me around."
"Leah, none of us are rejecting the imprint. We are just re-evaluating our lives. It has nothing to do with Bella except that she's kindly agreed to let us stay with her for a while." Kim told her firmly.
"What's a pack sister for?" I faked a smile at her.
"Exactly." Kim nodded before turning back to Leah, "Now could we all please get the hungry breakfast with orange juice and coffee, lots of coffee. Please."
Leah spun around and walked away from us. She threw her order pad at another waitress and stormed out the back.
Jenna sighed and got up to order our breakfast at the counter.
"You aren't doing this because of me are you?" I turned to them.
Holly shrugged, "For me, a little since it's you Jake is in love with but maybe, like for Jenna that wouldn't matter. I don't know."
"We never talked about these things before." Kim added, "That doesn't mean we didn't think about or worry about them."
"We just weren't brave enough to question it." Emily sighed.
We ate our breakfast once again lost in our own thoughts.
"Come on, let's go check out the damage and reassure the boys we aren't rejecting the imprints." Emily herded us out.
"Do you think it's hurting them? What we're doing?" Jenna asked as we left.
"Yes." Emily answered honestly. "We just have to make them understand that the bond of the imprint is fine. It's only the rest of it we're rejecting."
"Right." Jenna nodded, still looking a little unsure.
"Jen?" Holly linked arms with the younger girl.
"I don't want to hurt Seth."
"None of us want to hurt them Jen."
"I know you love him. We all love them and if that's enough for you, then great, I hope you are happy. Angela seems to be." I told her, "It's not enough for me."
"No, me either." Kim nodded.
"I can't live like this. It was all fine before Bella came but now when Jake's not around I cry. I'm always wondering if he still really wishes he'd imprinted on her."
"I wouldn't let myself acknowledge that I was unhappy. Sam was hurting so much for having hurt me. I just accepted that he needed me. It's not enough though. I want to be married to someone who wants to be married to me, not a man who still loves my cousin."
Jenna nodded, "I know and when I'm not with him, I hate the feeling that he's only with me because he has to be but when we're together, I can't help but forget all that and just get lost in the feel of being near him."
"Yeah, we all have that problem." Holly agreed.
"But we'll all be there to support each other, just like when they came by Bella's last night." Emily stated confidently.
We all agreed with her and decided it was time to head to the reservation and face the pack.
We drove straight to Emily's house. It was a mess. The door was off the hinges, windows were broken, the shrubbery looked bulldozed in places, it was like a tornado had been through.
"What the hell." Emily climbed out of her car and looked around the yard.
"Fuck." Holly swore walking around the debris.
"Do you think it was a leech?" Jenna's scared voice affected us all.
I spun around and began running for Paul's place cursing the wedges I wore. Kim was behind me, running for Jared's and we heard Emily screaming for Sam. All I could think was that I had to get to Paul and that I would know. If something happened to him, I would be able to tell. The imprint would somehow communicate it. It had to. Paul couldn't be hurt. I just couldn't lose him. Life couldn't be that cruel. After everything, I still believed there was some good, that sometimes there was a happy ending. Maybe not a fairy tale one where everything works out perfectly and no one ever really suffers but a good one, one where Paul and I built a relationship, one where he was with me. Hell, I'd make Sam my best fucking friend if only Paul was ok. He had to be ok. I'd know if he wasn't.
The house didn't look much better than Sam's had, at least not on the inside. Paul had phased inside.
Please god, please, not Paul.
The mantra repeated through my mind as I ran out the back door, screaming for Paul.
I came face to face with three wolves and my heart nearly exploded in relief. I ran straight into Paul's arms, jumping to wrap my legs around his narrow waist, I buried my face in his neck and wept.
I heard a crash and peaked up to see Jared knock over the chair he was sitting in and run in the direction of his home. He must have heard Kim calling for him.
"Emily," Sam demanded, "Where's Em?"
"Home looking for you." I told him burying my head into Paul's neck again and breathing in his scent.
Paul dropped to the ground still holding me tightly to him, "What happened baby?" He asked between murmuring comforting words and rubbing my back.
"Happened? I have no idea." I finally pulled away from him. "God Paul, are you ok? Are the other guys? Who was it? The blonde? Did you catch her?"
He looked confused, "Who was who Bella? The blonde hasn't been back since the other night."
I felt tears rising again as I sniffled at him, "We went to the house, Emily's house and its wrecked and Jenna thought maybe a leech might have done it. I was afraid something happened to you." I sobbed and clung to him again, burying my head in his shoulder.
"It's fine baby. No leeches on the rez. I swear."
"You phased in the house."
"I found out you'd left me. I freaked out a little. You should see Jared's place."
"Is that what happened at Sam's?" he didn't answer so I pulled away to look at him. "Paul?"
"There was a bit of a fight after we left you girls last night but its fine, we're all fine, I promise."
"A fight? With who? You said there were no leeches here!"
"With each other, its fine, it happens. We were all just a little freaked out."
I pulled away from him and tried to stand but pain shot through my ankle and I collapsed. Paul caught me and pulled me into his arms, lifting me and carrying me inside. He set me on the kitchen counter and lifted my ankle, it was badly swollen, the adrenaline while I'd been running had kept me from noticing I'd hurt it.
"Fuck Bella, what did you do to yourself."
I shrugged, "I ran here from Sam's."
"In those shoes?" He demanded.
"I was worried about you!"
"If there had been a vampire what would you have done anyways? You should have taken care of yourself!"
"I'm fine, it's a sprain or something."
"We're going to the hospital." He lifted me again and carried me outside. "We can pick up your things on the way back."
"Pick up my things?"
"From Forks."
"No."
"Bella."
"Don't even try to pull that arrogant Sam clone, you will follow my orders, crap."
He set me gently on the truck seat and stepped back taking deep breaths, "Please tell me what all this shit is about Bella. Until two nights ago, everything was fine. Then you go spend a few hours with the imprints and all of you ignore us, you lock me out of our room and then move out with four of them. What the hell happened?"
"We bonded." I smirked a little, "Isn't that what you wanted."
He growled and slammed his fist into the side of the truck, "I wanted you to be a part of the fucking pack Bella."
"You wanted me to toe the line and play good little imprint like the other girls." I spat back at him. "What was it Sam said? To get me under control? Sorry but that's not me and they are tired of doing it to."
"So you convinced them to reject the imprint?"
"No, none of us are rejecting the imprint and it was Holly who brought it up not me so you can take all that blame and shove it up the pack's ass."
"If you aren't rejecting the imprint why have all of you left?" He yelled back at me, shaking lightly.
"I moved out of your house Paul. If I were rejecting the imprint I'd have moved back to New Orleans!"
"So what the fuck is this then!"
"What fucking difference does it make if I live with you or not? I'm still here, you can play protector wolf and take care of your imprint without giving up your space."
"When did I ever, ever indicate that I didn't want you here or that I felt like I was giving up something I wanted by moving you in here?"
"You want me here so the wolf sees I'm safe and eating. Like Kim said, you can run a quick check around my house when you feel the need and if it makes you feel better to watch me eat a couple of meals we can meet at the diner or you can come over for dinner. As for you giving up something you wanted well that's a different matter entirely, unless you meant besides your freedom of choice and a woman you could love."
He growled in frustration, shaking, "What the fuck is it you want from me?"
"Nothing Paul. I don't want anything from you. I'm your imprint. Fine, I'll stay in Forks and be your imprint but I do not want anything from you!"
He backed away as the shaking got worse, clenching his fists to try to stop from phasing. "Tell me what happened at Sam's. What is it that Holly brought up? Why were we fine when I left in the morning and then not fine after? What did she or I say or do to make you change your mind about being with me?"
"I told you Paul, I'm not rejecting the imprint."
"This isn't you Bella, it isn't us." The shaking seemed to lessen and his voice was more sad than angry, "We were happy. We were building something real. Please just tell me what happened."
"Real? Is any of this real Paul? You want to know what happened? You imprinted on me. That's what fucking happened, it's the same fucking thing that happened to Kim, Emily Holly and even Jenna, the thing that makes you need us, not love us Paul, need us. I accept the imprint and so do the girls, they are just fucking tired of pretending that any of their relationships are real and I really don't want to fucking start only to cry when you leave or lie to myself about how fucking unhappy I am like they do."
All the anger seemed to have left him as he sank into the grass, it was odd looking down at him for once. He looked so young and unsure.
"Do you want to go back to New Orleans?"
"I wont leave you like that Paul. I understand how the imprint works. I know you need me to be here."
His eyes lifted to meet mine, "That's not what I asked."
"Funny, I must have learned that from you."
"Bella."
"Paul."
"What do you want?"
"To know what you want, not what the imprint says to want, not what Sam or Jake or anyone else says, what do you want?"
"I told you, from the first morning you were here with me. I want you to stay. I want you to live here with me and I want you to be a part of the pack, a part of my family, I know we're fucked up, we all have our issues but it's my family." He sighed, "I'm trying Bella. I am and I know I'm not good at this shit, I've been on my own to long but I am fucking trying."
"Trying to what?"
"Make you happy, make you want to stay" he looked up at me, his eyes pools of swirling liquid chocolate and filled with pain, "to make you love me."
"Paul" My voice broke on his name.
"I can do better, be better, please Bella."
I dropped from the truck seat onto my good foot and dropped to my knees to move over to him. "I don't want to love somebody who doesn't love me. I can't do that, I can't be with someone who pretends to love me when he doesn't, I can't live a lie, not again Paul."
His eyes met mine again, "When have I ever lied to you or pretended to feel or be something I'm not?"
I tried to think about an instance when he had only been giving into the imprint but couldn't really. "You don't love me Paul," I rolled my eyes swallowing back tears, "you don't even really like me." One tear escaped, burning down my cheek, "You're just stuck with me because of the imprint." I swiped at the tears, "Its ok, we can make it work, we can be friends. It doesn't matter that you don't want me."
"Don't? What?" He growled, "I knew I should have listened to Sam."
I glared at him, "When don't you?"
"When I listen to Jared instead," He said grabbing me and pulling me into his arms, for a kiss that curled my toes and stole my ability to breathe let alone think clearly.
"What are you doing?" I panted at him when he finally released my mouth to breathe.
"Following Sam's advice." He said kissing down my neck.
"What's that?" I panted.
"Be myself."
"Huh?" Coherent thought was leaving me as he tugged my shirt over my head.
"Sam said you're my imprint so I should let my instincts guide me. Since my instincts lead to fighting and fucking, I figured I'd follow Jared's advice to be less of an asshole. To give you time to adjust to everything and be more comfortable with the pack and me. I figured he was right, after all, the thing you hate about Sam is that he's dominant, so I tried not to be." He explained while undressing me. "It doesn't seem to be working, so I guess I'll just have to do it my way."
"This is your way?" I asked as he laid me back in the grass.
"One of them." He told me leaning forward to take my nipple in his hot mouth. My answer was a loud moan. "Do you really think that I don't want you?" He asked before biting my nipple, he laved the sting with his tongue before moving over to my other breast. "I'm going to make sure you never make that mistake again." His hot tongue licked over the sensitive spots on my breasts while his hands skimmed over my stomach and hips. He pinched and twisted one nipple while gently kissing along the curve of the other. Then he ran his fingers gently over the sensitive curve of my hip while biting and sucking on my nipples. His hands and mouth explored my torso until I was a panting gooey mess, begging him to make me come.
"Please, Paul, please."
"I'm going to have you screaming my name so loud Jacob shits his baby alpha shorts and phases with jealousy." The possessiveness in his voice was like a caress.
All I could do was beg. "Yes, please Paul."
With a growl, he tore my panties from my body and then kissed along my thighs.
"Paul!" I whined, shifting my hips, "please, please, please."
He ignored me and took his time, caressing down my legs and kissing every sensitive spot right down to my feet. He was very gentle with my still swollen ankle, murmuring soothing words as he kissed the inside of my ankle.
I was nearly crying with need when he finally kissed his way back up my body. Finally, after a small eternity, his hot mouth descended on me. His tongue flicked over my clit and then delved inside of me, fucking me. As I squirmed and cried his name, he moved a hand to steady my hips, growling against my clit before sucking it into his mouth. The climax hit me so hard I screamed out his name just like he'd said I would. Before it was over, I felt him add a finger, slipping it inside of me as his tongue continued to flick over my clit. He pulled the finger out and added a second and as I felt myself coiling for another orgasm, he began to pump his fingers, curling them on the downward stroke.
His name was like a mantra now and I wasn't sure if I was begging him for more or to stop the intense feeling. I had never felt anything like it as the pressure crested and I came again, my body bowing in ecstasy.
I was still convulsing when he moved to cover my body with his. His heat seeping into me as I begged him, still unsure if I was begging for more or for him to stop as I was pretty sure the intensity of what he was making me feel might kill me.
I felt the tip of him at my entrance and he lifted his hands to my face, framing my head so that our eyes held.
"I have never and will never lie to you Bella. I want you. I wanted you before I imprinted on you. Its one of the things I hated most. That the fucking leech got to touch something I wanted. Now you are mine." He growled the last.
"Paul." I could only moan his name, as I attempted to rock up onto him.
"Mine." He growled again.
"Yours, yes, please Paul." I forgot the pain in my ankle as I wrapped my legs around his hips trying to pull his body down to mine.
He wouldn't let me look away as he pushed into me slowly. I could feel my eyes rolling back in my head at the feel of him stretching me as he slid gently home. He held still, his eyes meeting mine a moment longer before he bent to my ear and whispered, "I'll never lie to you Bella, because I love you."
I gasped and he began to move. There was nothing slow or gentle about him now. His body slammed into mine, as he growled above me and I panted his name, urging him to take me harder.
When he growled and I felt him climax, the heat of his semen pulsing against my cervix. I tumbled into an orgasm so explosive I was screaming his name, arching against him and blackness was creeping over my senses.
A short time later, I blinked open my eyes coming to my senses curled in Paul's arms, both of us still naked; he was smirking at me. "I think even the non-wolves on the rez might have heard that."
I punched him in the arm with the little strength I had. I still felt entirely boneless. I had never ever had an orgasm that intense in my life.
"This one time, and never, ever repeat this, but Sam was right."
Paul laughed, "He's right a lot, trust me."
"Why do you let him speak for you?"
"I don't." I lifted my eyebrow at him in question. "Sam took the lead with explaining things to you because I refused to and because I'd have torn a few chunks out of Jake if he had."
"Why?"
"I'm a possessive asshole and baby alpha and I don't get along."
"Baby alpha? You've called him that before, why? Did Sam make him his next in line or whatever it is?"
"Jake, by all rights of the blood lines is supposed to be alpha. He just never stepped up."
"Why?"
Paul shrugged, "He didn't want the responsibility. He didn't want to be a wolf."
"Neither did any of you."
Paul shrugged, "Baby Alpha never cared to step up."
"Wait." Something hit me then, "Alpha? Jake couldn't speak to me because of an Alpha order but if he was meant to be Alpha then…"
"Then if he really wanted to he could have broken Sam's order, taken the pack and gone to you." Paul completed my thought.
"He didn't do that."
"No."
"For my own safety."
"Yes."
"What about Billy?"
"Billy?"
"Yeah, Billy. Or the kids in school or your friends."
"We separated ourselves from old friendships. You saw that with Quil."
"So what if Quil confronted Jake about it in school and he got angry and phased, not only would the secret have been out but kids could have gotten hurt. Why was I so fucking special? How come Billy could live with a temperamental new werewolf but I didn't even warrant a proper goodbye? Not even a fucking phone call." Paul opened his mouth but I cut him off before he could say anything "You know what don't even try to make excuses. I don't want to hear about it."
"I need to get you to a hospital. We need to get that ankle x-rayed."
"It's fine."
Paul just rolled his eyes and pulled on his shorts and then helped me to dress. Now that I was thinking about it again, the pain in my ankle really was bad.
We drove in silence to the Forks hospital and then sat in the waiting room to see a doctor. Neither of us spoke for the two hours we were there. Nothing was broken but it was a really bad sprain.
"You just passed the turn off to my house."
"Our house is in La Push and I'm taking you there."
"No." Paul ignored me. "Don't you have to do what I want or some shit? I want you to take me home."
"No I don't and I am taking you home."
"Paul."
"Bella."
"Why are you doing this?"
"Taking you home?"
I rolled my eyes and instead of fighting with him, I decided to try to get some of the answers I wanted. "Why don't you and Jake get along?"
"I'm an angry possessive asshole who doesn't give a flying fuck about anyone but himself and the pack. Jake on the other hand is an entitled little pansy puppy goody boy who thinks sun shines out of his ass. I don't get along with him because he puts himself above the pack, he still wont embrace what we are, he's selfish and that is dangerous for us and more recently because he thinks he has a right to question my relationship with you."
"Why didn't you want to deal with the imprint yourself?"
"One, because you didn't know me from the escaped mental patient down the block, two because I was freaked out and didn't want to fuck it up and three because Sam is my friend as well as Alpha. He's the only one besides Jared I trust with everything that I am, not because he's pack or Alpha but because of who he is."
"When I got here everyone was either solicitous or glaring at me, why?"
"We all like Charlie. He's a good man and he's really been good to Sue and she has always been a godsend to us. We want the best for them and he missed you. Also because we're wolves, we have excellent hearing and we don't like our alpha being attacked."
"Attacked? You mean berated for being a domineering prick who thinks he has some right to a say in my life?"
"I mean that the guy saved your life and you wont even give him a chance to explain why he did what he did."
"I did, safety of myself and secrecy of the pack."
"Those were his reasons as Alpha. Maybe if you stopped attacking him at every turn and gave him the chance to relax and be himself you'd see the real Sam."
"The one who broke Leah's heart by going after her cousin without giving her a reason for ending their relationship? Or the one that guilted Emily into being with him?"
"Guilted?"
"Never mind. It's between them."
"Fine, let it be between them and stop brining the other imprints between us. We were fine until a few days ago. You were happy living with me."
I turned to look out the window, I didn't have a response, I had been happy. I'd felt peace I hadn't known before.
"Bella?"
"Paul." He pulled to a stop outside the house. Looking at the house reminded me of the state of the inside and of Sam and Emily's home. "What was the fight at Sam's about?"
"The pack drew a few lines in the sand."
"What lines?"
"Sam challenged Jake to take Alpha."
"You mean Jake challenged Sam."
"No," he sighed, "Sam demanded Jake take his place."
"Why?"
"Sam is, well not exactly only human but he's fallible like people are. He made a mistake with you and Jake threw it in his face. Tensions were high and shit happened."
"So did Jake take command?"
Paul shook his head, "He knows Jared and I will never follow him. I don't think Sam can ever fully give over the power of Alpha either. It's a part of him now."
"So if Jake tried to take it, he'd have to fight Sam?"
"I don't know but the pack would be split. Quil and Embry stood with Jake, Collin and Brady with us. Seth didn't want to choose but Leah went with Jake so he followed her."
"An even split." I mumbled.
"Not exactly."
"Why?"
"Sam has been Alpha a long time, he's connected to his wolf more than Jake because he has embraced what he is and Jake still resents it. Jared and I have both embraced this life as well, Jared more than anyone. Leah might be faster but Jared is connected with that form, he's fast, smart and he doesn't hesitate."
"That leaves you and the twins."
"Seth wouldn't want to fight. He'd go easy. Brady and Collin are perfectly synced together, they've always been on the same wave length, used to sharing thoughts so the pack mind never phased them and they are able to use it to their benefit in more ways than even Sam, Jared and I who've been living with it longer."
"And you? Sam said you're his best fighter."
"I'm the angriest bastard in the pack. Used to be I fought in school. Taking a hit doesn't slow me down; I've been taking them since I was a toddler. I use the anger but it doesn't control me, I separate my emotion from the situation so I'm clearheaded in a fight."
"So if there was a split Sam would have the stronger pack."
"Unless the twins changed, yes. If it were only the three of us the fight would not be a good one for us."
"Is the pack splitting?"
"No. It was a fight Bella. Sam wanted Jake to step up but I will never follow him and made that clear. We all drew a few lines had a bit of a fight and moved on. Fighting in the pack happens, we just usually keep it far from the houses and the imprints."
"Couldn't he just Alpha order you to follow him?"
"Yes and no."
"How?"
"He would have to compel my every action every minute of everyday and he's not strong enough to do that."
"I thought an Alpha order is absolute."
"I accept and submit to Sam's rein over me, this acceptance gives him more power than if I continually fought against his authority."
"So if Jake tried to give you an Alpha order you could fight it?"
"I don't know but I'd try and there are ways to manipulate an order. For example, one time not to long after I phased, Sam ordered me not to pick a fight with a kid in school I had some issues with so I had him pick a fight with me. Orders have to be worded just right or they'll leave loopholes."
"What would happen if he tried to fight you to make you submit to him?"
"I'd kill him." There was no hesitation in his answer. It wasn't arrogant or boastful just simple, direct and matter of fact.
"So what now?"
"With us?"
"With the pack." I clarified, the us part could wait a minute longer. I wouldn't get
any more answers after we went back to talking about us.
He shrugged, "Nothing. Sam is alpha, the pack worked out some of its aggression and we'll go back to being our normal, fucked up family. We just have to get the imprints sorted."
"Get us sorted?" I snorted at him.
"Bella, you and the girls are our soul mates."
"No, we aren't Paul, we're your imprints."
"It's the same thing."
"Is it?"
He growled again, "Yes. Damn it. It is. You and I are meant for each other."
"Like Sam and Emily or Jared and Kim?"
"Yes."
"Except that Sam is still in love with Leah and Jared never even noticed Kim in the two years they shared advanced math."
Sam's not in love with Leah. He loves her, sure, but he is in love with Emily and he'd chose Em everytime. He did choose Em. Jared didn't notice a lot of girls, well he noticed them but he and I were both focused on leaving here. I might have fucked around but he was focused on school, he didn't want to date some girl and then break her heart by fucking off with me after graduation."
"Sam didn't choose Emily, he imprinted on her, the choice was taken away and even Emily can see he still loves Leah."
"And Kim?"
"She's loved Jared forever and he didn't even care to speak to her or be her friend until he imprinted. She wasn't worth his time and she has to live with it everyday. Do you really think any of them don't see, can't tell that as much as you all need them you all resent the imprint? I don't want that Paul. I will not love blindly and let myself be broken again."
"So you refuse to be with me because I imprinted?"
"I refuse to jump into pretending to be part of this happy little family when it's all lies."
"So what then Bella?"
"Now you take me home and we do this the right way. Without the imprint crap." He frowned at me, looking so adorably confused. "We date Paul. You know, build a relationship like normal couples do. Continue getting to know each other. Let things progress naturally."
He sighed, "Fine." He turned to look at me, "Just remember this separation is on you. I want you here. I want you in my life and my bed. Me and the wolf both."
I nodded, "I guess Jared and Sam were both right Paul. I need you to be you. No lies or hiding things and I need time."
He nodded and turned over the engine to drive me back to Forks, but turned back to me first. "I can give you time Bella. I can give you any life you want here. I wish I could give you New Orleans and Paris or wherever but I can't, not with me anyways. If it's what you want, I can let you go. Like you said to Sam, I've learned to live with suffering, I hate that the pack will suffer with me but your happiness is more important. That is the imprint. I'm a selfish bastard and don't ever want to let you leave." He sighed and ran his hand through his hair, "This is my life Bella. I love who I am. I love what I am. Jared, Sam and I have all accepted our fate and embraced it. I'm happy. For the first time in my life, I'm happy. My life here is good. It's all I've ever wanted, now that you're here anyways. So I can give you any life you want. I have the money to buy you a business, move Lisa here and buy your Forks house for her. I have the money to buy or build you a bigger house. I have the money to give you almost any luxury, I just don't need or care for all that so I don't live like it, but I can afford to buy you all the designed crap, all the nice things in the world. I can give you any life here but even if I could abandon my responsibilities and my pack, I love living here, I love my family and my pack."
I nodded, "I'm not asking you to change Paul. I want to know you. I want to know why you love them, why you trust Sam and everything else about your life here. I want to be here. I just need time to know its all real."
He nodded and turned back to the front, shifting the truck into gear and driving us back to my house in Forks. When he parked, he turned back to me, "I'll leave you my truck.
I nodded, "I do love you Paul."
"You just don't trust that I really love you."
"I'm trying."
"I know."
It was all that we could say for now. I nodded and got out of the truck. He watched me walk inside and from the window, I watched him turn and walk into the woods to phase. I could feel my heart breaking a little. I hated hurting him.
I was surprised to find Emily had beaten me back. I had almost thought she and the others wouldn't be back. I was wrong. They all came. It hurt to hurt them. We loved them. We wanted our happy endings to be real though. We wanted, we deserved to be loved, not just needed; to be girlfriends and wives not just imprints.