Disclaimer: I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.
A/N-Okay, first things first. A number of you had questions about what a "DTR" is. A DTR is "Define the Relationship" so it's whenever two people sit down and lay out what exactly the nature of their relationship is. So are we just friends? Boyfriend/girlfriend? Casually dating? Things like that which is what Lily and James did at the end of the last chapter.
Also, a few have pointed out that James always seems to be the one chasing Lily in this story. I have to tell you, I realized that a few chapters ago as well. That's not really intentional, it's just the way I happened to write it. You'll just have to trust that it's kind of remedied later on. There are reasons for it though. The first is that I am pretty traditional myself and I feel like the guy really is the one that needs to take charge. Another is that Lily is written with some of my personality traits, one of those being that she is pretty shy when it comes to things like that. And then also, James has had 4 years to work out how he feels about Lily and he is sure of it. Lily has had 3 months and she's had a lot of emotion thrown at her.
Chapter 11: The First Date
Lily woke up early on Saturday morning feeling blissful. A big smile formed on her face as she remembered that in a matter of hours she would be on her date with James. She sighed happily, the bright sunshine that was pouring into her bedroom reflecting her mood perfectly. Friday had been like a dream. She and James hadn't had much opportunity to talk but every once in a while she would catch his eye and they would share a secretive smile.
As she pushed the curtains of her bed aside she felt the faint fluttering of nervous butterflies in the pit of her stomach, but nothing could rid her of the peace she had felt since James told her how he felt two days ago. She had gotten a full night's sleep for the first time since Halloween and was in much better spirits for it. Even Mary and Jenna had noticed a difference in her demeanor, though neither knew what had brought about the change.
The three girls made their way to the Great Hall for breakfast in their pajamas, a practice the 7th years from all four houses had been exercising on weekends as their workload increased. Mary left them and headed to where Emmett was sitting with Bill and Brady while she and Jenna sat down next to Sirius, Peter and Remus.
"Where's James?" Jenna asked as she drizzled a large amount of syrup over her waffles. She looked up and down the table to see if he was sitting somewhere else and (to Lily's annoyance) even looked over at the Ravenclaw table to see if he was sitting with Lexi.
Sirius shrugged, his mouth full of partly chewed pancake. "Weon't know weree 's," he mumbled spraying bits of food into the air as he tried to speak. Jenna looked confused and Remus looked over at him, a look of clear disgust evident on his face.
"What?" Sirius asked innocently after a huge swallow but he was grinning as Remus shook his head.
"We don't know where he is," Remus said, ignoring Sirius and answering Jenna's question. "He said he had 'things to take care of' when he woke up this morning and we haven't seen him since."
"He practically skipped out of the dormitory though," Peter added. Lily had to bite her lip and duck her head down in order to keep herself from grinning as she had a fairly good idea of what James was doing. She looked up and found Sirius watching her carefully, calculating her reaction. She swallowed hard and he just raised his eyebrows at her and then went back to attacking his pancakes.
Lily kept staring at him. Did he know? Sirius wasn't really known for his discretion and she felt that if he knew, everyone in the school would know.
But she was distracted from her thoughts when Rosalyn walked behind him and bumped her hip against his back violently as she passed causing him to spill the entire goblet of orange juice he'd been drinking all down his front.
Remus and Peter burst into fits of laughter, though Remus had the decency to look a little pitying. Lily had to cover her mouth to stifle her own laughter. Jenna, who had had some of Sirius' orange juice poured on her pants as well, stared after Rosalyn, an ugly and mutinous look on her face. Sirius, for his part, was muttering a continuous stream of curse words and expletives which only made Remus and Peter laugh harder, though a few 2nd year girls sitting near them flinched every time he said another one.
The group headed back to the common room after breakfast and spent the rest of the morning leisurely sitting around the fire. Sirius was in a bad mood the rest of the morning, even after he changed his clothes.
Lily didn't participate much in the conversation, her mind constantly drifting to the date that was coming ever closer. She thought endlessly about what she would wear. James had been very secretive about what he had planned for them that afternoon so she didn't know whether she should plan on being warm or cold, jeans or a skirt, short sleeves or long. She checked her watch constantly until finally it reached eleven and she stood up and walked toward the staircase.
"Where are you going?" Mary demanded, looking over at Lily with an expression bordering on exasperation.
Lily tried to look innocent, but Mary's and Jenna's faces clearly told her that they weren't buying her act. "I'm just going to get dressed. I'm tired of being in my pajamas," she replied, hoping she sounded disinterested rather than evasive.
"That's a good idea, we'll come too," Jenna said, hitting Mary lightly on the arm and then pushing herself off the floor and walking over to Lily who was trying to look like she thought this was a good idea too.
They made their way up the staircase, Jenna muttering about how she'd like to spill Bubotuber Puss all over Rosalyn's clothes while Mary looked on trying to make sure that she was only kidding. The other two girls pulled on sweatshirts and jeans and in a matter of minutes they were ready to return to the Common Room. Lily on the other hand was still standing in front of the mirror alternately holding up a form fitting dark purple sweater and a light blue top made of a flowy material against her body.
"What are you doing?" Jenna asked, shooting Lily an uncertain look.
"Which do you think I should wear?" Lily asked, not really answering Jenna's question.
"The purple," she answered automatically, giving Mary a significant look.
"Really?" Lily asked, holding the purple sweater up again and critiquing it in the mirror. "You don't think the blue one would be prettier?"
"Well, the blue one's prettier but it's freezing so unless you plan on sitting right next to the fire all day, I'd go with the sweater," Mary added practically.
"Good point!" Lily responded and then pulled off her pajama top and put the sweater on, examining the way she looked in it in the mirror.
Mary and Jenna continued to look on exasperated and confused as Lily spent ten minutes trying to decide whether her trainers or heels looked better with the jeans she had picked out (finally choosing the trainers for the same reason she chose the sweater), when she put more make up on than she typically did on normal school days, and when she spent an extra thirty minutes putting big, loose curls in her already wavy hair. When they questioned her about her reasons she answered, "Don't you ever have those days when you just feel like looking pretty?" Mary shook her head and said she had never felt that way while Jenna just continued to stare at Lily, a calculating look on her face.
They headed back down to the Common Room just in time to meet the boys to head down to the Great Hall for lunch, but Lily made Mary and Jenna stare at her again when she claimed that she wasn't hungry and was going to stay in the Common Room.
As Jenna climbed through the portrait hole, Lily heard her mumble, "That girl has to be the only person alive who would spend an hour getting 'pretty' only to stay up here where no one will see her."
Lily waited in the empty Common Room for another ten minutes until 12:15, the time she and James had decided they would meet in front of the Fat Lady. When she finally pushed herself through the portrait hole and into the corridor, her stomach squirmed excitedly and she couldn't keep a smile from breaking across her lips and her eyes flickered over to where James was already waiting for her, leaning casually against the wall with his hands in his pockets.
He looked up when he heard the portrait close. A smile matching Lily's snuck up his lips as his eyes met hers. Lily immediately felt her cheeks redden. This one silent exchange between the two of them made her happier than anything had all year.
"You look beautiful," he said, his eyes dazed.
She smiled cheekily. "Ah, you're already off to a good start, Potter." He laughed nervously and ran a hand through his unkempt hair. "And thank you," she added. "You look really nice too." She meant it as well. He was wearing jeans and his scarlet sweater, a favorite of hers, though she had never told him that before. It suddenly occurred to her that she no longer had to pretend that she didn't notice how great he looked and was allowed to tell him so. "I really like that sweater on you. It makes you look very…" but all of a sudden she couldn't find the right word. Simple words like "handsome" and "good" eluded her until she blurted out, "muscular." It was the truth, she thought, but then blushed. She inwardly rolled her eyes at herself because though her comment was honest and she knew it was okay to tell him that, she now felt stupid and thought it sounded forced and cheesy.
James gave her a funny look and though he was grinning, it was obvious that he was slightly embarrassed as well. He cleared his throat. "Okay," he drawled.
There was a moment of awkward silence before Lily covered her eyes with her hand and groaned, "I can't believe I just said that." Lily laughed at herself, breaking the tension. "I was just trying to pay you a compliment."
"Well, thanks," James said uncertainly and pointed down the corridor. "Maybe we should just get going." He ran a hand through his hair again, and perhaps if the butterflies in Lily's stomach were not being so distracting, she would have recognized this as a sign of his mutual nervousness. But, as it were, she did not.
"Right," Lily murmured and followed as James headed off. She fell into step next to him, quiet so that all that could be heard were their echoing footsteps off the walls. The silence was stifling and Lily felt sure that he could hear her heart pounding as loud as a drum. After they had walked through a few of the corridors, she couldn't stand it anymore. "Oh man!" she whined, causing James to look over at her in surprise. "Is this whole date going to be super awkward?" she asked, stopping in her tracks.
James stopped next to her and gazed at her, a contemplative look upon his face. "You think this is awkward?"
Lily pierced him with a disbelieving look. "You think our little exchange back there was normal? You think us walking in silence isn't awkward?"
James shifted uncomfortably, turning her question over in his mind, and then returned her gaze. "Yeah, I guess you're right." He gave her an apologetic look and scratched the back of his head. "You're just going to have to give me a little grace today though. I'm nervous! It'll be better next time, I promise."
She grinned at his mention of their next date, filled with happiness at the knowledge that he didn't even consider the possibility that their date would be a disaster and they wouldn't want to go out again an option. "I guess I could do that," she said quietly, taking a step forward even though she had no idea where they were headed. James grinned back at her and began walking as well. Lily sighed and then reached over and grabbed him by the hand, intertwining their fingers. "I find it interesting that you're so sure there will be a second date," she said sarcastically with a tone of mock seriousness.
Her voice was confident and playful, disguising the giddy thrill that had erupted in the pit of her stomach when she had fit her hand perfectly into James'. Her skin tingled and was pleasantly warm at every place it brushed against his. He bantered back at her, his thumb absentmindedly tracing circles on the back of her hand. The physical feeling of it was incredible but there was something more than that. She loved the feeling of ease and perfection that she felt while holding his hand. There was a euphoria of newness about it, but also a sense of timelessness and ease, like they'd been doing it forever.
And as she giggled while he explained his belief that over the past six years he had earned at least a second date, she thought to herself, "If everything with James is this easy, falling for him is going to be simple." It was a thought that simultaneously excited her and scared her to death. She knew how volatile and explosive they both could be at times and she had seen couples much more compatible than the two of them rip themselves apart.
Determined not to worry right now about a thought that haunted her more than she wanted to admit, she pushed it from her mind and leaned in a little closer to him, letting his gentle musk sweep over her.
She wasn't paying attention to where they were going and soon found herself standing in front of a painting of a large bowl of fruit; a painting she knew led to the kitchens.
James released her hand and turned to face her, walking slowly back toward the painting. He had an excited grin on his face, his eyes alight and twinkling as he watched her. "Now, our first stop is a place that not too many people know about. In fact," he added a bit haughtily, "I can only think of four students who know what's behind this painting." He smirked at her before turning and raising his arm to tickle the pear.
Lily, not wanting to burst his bubble because he was clearly very excited to show her this, kept her mouth shut and plastered a politely curious smile on her face.
After he pushed the door open, he extended his hand to her (which she accepted eagerly) and guided her through the doorway.
"Welcome to the Hogwarts kitchens," he announced in what he assumed was an awe-inspiring voice. What it really did was make it that much more difficult for Lily to keep herself from giggling at the show he was putting on for her.
"Wow," she whistled in a low voice. In all fairness, it was an incredible sight. The room was flooded with soft light from the bright, snowy day outside. As it was lunchtime, the kitchen was buzzing with movement, various loud sounds, and delicious smells. Tiny house-elves scurried around back and forth between the ovens and the giant tables that matched the house tables upstairs. Every once in a while, James and Lily would hear a loud crack as food was sent to the tables above.
"I thought you'd like to see this," James grinned, clearly pleased with himself. "Look familiar?"
"It looks like the Great Hall," Lily supplied, assuming that that's what James was trying to point out to her.
"Exactly!" he exclaimed. He pointed to the tables where one of the smallest house-elves, wearing his uniform tea towel stamped with the Hogwarts crest, was lifting a plate of chicken wings. "See, what they do here is put the food on these tables and then send them up to our tables during meal times."
"Oh! I always wondered how they did that!" Lily said, hardly believing that James was buying her poor acting job.
Just then, the house-elf that they'd been watching moments earlier looked over and waved. James lifted his hand and waved back. The elf disappeared briefly behind the ovens and then reappeared hauling a large picnic basket. He brought it over to them, a large smile on his face. He bowed to them both before he started speaking.
"Hello, Mr. James, sir," squeaked the little elf. When James took the basket from his hands, he said, "Thank you, sir." He looked ready to go back about his work whenever his eyes landed on Lily. The already tennis ball sized eyes grew even larger, as did his smile. "I did not know it would be Miss Lily you brought with you today, sir." The elf watched them expectantly.
James snapped his head around to look over at Lily, a look of confusion on his face. Lily was biting her lip in a vain attempt to suppress a guilty grin.
"Wait a minute! You've…" he narrowed his eyes at her and then looked back over at the house-elf who was no longer smiling but watching them both apprehensively. "She's been down here before?"
"Yes, sir," the elf squeaked as he uncomfortably squirmed from one foot to the next. "Miss Lily comes down here many times. I is seeing her two or three times a month. Her favorites is roast beef sandwiches and strawberry cheesecakes, sir."
"Thank you, Blinky," James muttered in dismissal. The house-elf bowed once again and then returned to his work while James turned and silently pulled Lily from the kitchen. Lily was trying desperately to keep herself from laughing but once the door closed behind them, she couldn't keep quiet anymore. She pulled her hand out of James' grasp and leaned against the wall to support her shaking body as she began giggling madly. James looked at her, shaking his head and trying to look more upset than he really was for she could see a hint of a smile threatening to turn up the corners of his mouth. "Why didn't you tell me you'd been to the kitchens before?"
Lily shrugged and tried to calm her giggles long enough to answer him. "You were so excited about showing me something about the castle I didn't know yet. I didn't want to ruin your fun," she explained, an apologetic smile on her face.
James rolled his eyes and started walking again, Lily fell into step next to him, still giggling every once in a while. "Well, now I just feel like a moron, so…"
"Not a moron!" Lily protested. "You were very cute."
James scoffed and looked down at her. "Great, so during the fifteen or so minutes we've been on this date, I've been 'awkward' and 'cute.' Those weren't really what I was going for."
"Don't forget muscular! You were muscular, too," Lily interjected, a teasing smile on her face.
"Ah, yes, of course! How could I forget that?" he asked sarcastically, but his grin was back in place. "How did you find out about the kitchens anyway?" he asked as they made their way through the deserted Entrance Hall.
"Jenna found it our second year," Lily explained. At James' still curious expression, she elaborated. "She missed dinner one night so she asked Nearly Headless Nick where she could get a snack and he told her."
"Wow…I don't know why we didn't think of that…" James muttered to himself, dumbfounded.
"Why? How did you find it?"
James blushed. "We – Padfoot, Moony, Wormtail and I – stayed awake one night and then hid in the common room until an elf came in and then we ambushed him. It was actually a pretty impressive plan," he said, swept up in his memory as he led her through the Entrance Hall. "We were prepared to interrogate him and then follow him to the kitchens. But all we had to do was ask and he told us…it was actually kind of anticlimactic now that I think about it."
Lily shook her head. "You four are ridiculous," she said, affectionately rolling her eyes.
"We might be ridiculous, yes. But we have fun," he defended as he pushed open the front doors.
"James…what are you doing?" she asked, a puzzled look on her face.
"Going outside," he answered simply, knowing full well that he wasn't really answering her question. She glared at him and he just smiled serenely back at her.
"Why are you going outside?"
"We're having a picnic," he clarified as though it were the obvious answer to her question. "What did you think we were doing with a picnic basket?"
"Outside?" she exploded, disbelieving. "I thought we were going to have an indoor picnic or something." She looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to say that he was only joking. When he said nothing, she blurted out, "James! It's snowing!"
"I know that," he said with a shrug. "Don't you trust me?"
"I don't know," Lily whined, eyeing the snow warily as a cool breeze flew in and kissed her warm cheeks. She looked at James' waiting face and she felt her uncertainty melt away. She sighed and smiled warmly at him. "Okay, let's go." She followed him out of the door and across the lawn, her hands shoved deep into her jacket pockets. She kept her body close to his and blinked against the unfriendly winter wind.
When they reached the Quidditch Pitch, Lily looked over at him, an eyebrow raised. He chuckled, murmured, "Trust me," and then kept walking. He led her around to the other side of the Gryffindor locker rooms and she was greeted with a surprising sight.
A small table was set up, complete with a burgundy table cloth, plates, goblets, napkins, silverware, and floating candles. Also, a few feet away from the table was a roaring fire.
James watched her as she took in the picnic he had set up for them, her red curls blowing gently around her head. A slow smile crept up her face as she turned to look at him. He was glad that he could finally just watch her, unashamed, without having to look away or hide what he was feeling whenever she turned her eyes upon him. She blushed under his gaze, but didn't look away, the same feelings he had for her mirrored in her emerald eyes.
"I told you to trust me," he said, the hoarseness of his voice cancelling out the playfulness he had intended with his words.
"I'll never doubt again," she replied as he pulled the chair out for her and she willingly sat down. "Oh! The chair is warm!" Lily said in surprise as he sat down across from her.
"Yeah, I used a heating charm to keep the seats warm." She looked impressed so he continued. "The locker rooms block the wind and the fire is waterproof. That way we can stay warm and still get to enjoy this great view!" The view was lovely. They were at the top of a gentle hill and could see the snow covered grounds clearly. She could see part of the lake that had frozen over and the edge of the Forbidden Forest, its treetops blanketed with the falling snowflakes. "Remind me later on when it warms back up that there's somewhere I want to take you. There's this really nice, secluded clearing just on the other side of the lake. It has a creek running through it…it's really nice. I'll take you in the Spring. Not too many people know about it because it's borderline inside the Forest." He paused and considered her for a moment. "Although, I thought that about the kitchens too and I was wrong so…"
Lily laughed quietly, her heart light as she listened to him make plans for them months in advance. She tried to keep herself calm rather than giddy and girly. "Well, you're in luck. I've never been to this 'borderline Forbidden Forest clearing,' so that one will be a surprise."
He smiled and leaned down to the basket to pull out some food. She hugged her arms into her chest and subtly leaned closer to the fire. Though they were indeed out of the wind, now that they were still and no longer walking, the cold had set deep into her bones. She could feel the heat from the fire but it did nothing to warm her up. She was freezing but James had worked so hard to set his up, she didn't want it to have all been for nothing. She tried to keep herself from noticeably shivering as he pulled out a loaf of bread and two bottles of butterbeer.
"I thought since we are outside we should have some hot food," he said. "How about some clam chowder?" He ladled a bowlful of the steaming soup for her. She leaned her face over it, allowing the steam to drift up and warm up her numb cheeks.
"Smells delicious," she said, only able to smell it because her hands were too cold to pull out of her sleeves. She noticed James shiver as he ladled himself some soup.
"It's still kind of cold out here, isn't it?" Lily nodded vehemently, not wanting to open her mouth in case her teeth started chattering. James watched her carefully, concern flickering across his face. "Are you okay? You look cold."
She nodded again. "I am cold, but I'll be okay," she said brightly, but her chattering teeth gave her away.
"Nope, come on, we're moving," he ordered as he stood up from his chair. He pulled out his wand, muttered, "Pack!" and watched as the food, plates and tablecloth expertly packed themselves into the picnic basket. Lily protested feebly by telling him she was fine, though she was already out of her seat, ready to move out of the cold. James pointed his wand at the fire, mumbled "Finite!" picked up the basket, put his hand lightly on Lily's back and led her into the locker rooms. "There's a fireplace in here," he said.
Lily felt immediate relief as she entered the tiny building just by getting out of the bitter cold. James pointed his wand at the grate and two fireballs shot into it and began crackling immediately. Lily moved to stand next to it and closed her eyes as the heat swept over her. As she relaxed, her body began shivering violently and her teeth chattered loudly.
"Geez, Lily, you're freezing," James said, horrified, as he moved next to her and wrapped his arms around her and began rubbing his hands up and down her arms, trying to warm her up. She smiled gratefully up at him, his concern for her evident on his face.
"If I d-d-didn't know any b-better, I'd say you p-planned this," she stuttered through her chattering teeth.
"Ha, ha," he replied sarcastically, his hands still rubbing vigorously. "You know I would never do this on purpose."
"I know…I'm j-just giving you a h-h-hard time." She felt better already, her shivers beginning subside as her body slowly warmed up. "Come on, let's eat. I'm starving." He looked at her apprehensively but then nodded and pulled the soup out of the basket and handed it to her as she sat down, her back against the wall. He tapped the bowl with his wand and she watched as steam began rising from the chowder again.
As he began eating his, he looked over at her, a grim smile on his face. "This is some date, huh? My big surprise wasn't a surprise at all, I tried to freeze you, and now we're eating on the floor of a locker room."
Lily giggled, allowing the heat from each spoonful to warm her from the inside out. She considered his statement for a moment. It was true, they were sitting on the floor of the Gryffindor locker room and there was no denying the distinct smell of stale sweat. But somehow, she was enjoying it more now. She figured part of that was due to the fact that she could finally feel her fingers again. But a bigger part was that she was snuggled up to James. She leaned her head briefly on his shoulder and without needing to look, she knew that he was smiling. "Yeah, but I think this is better," she muttered quietly.
To her surprise, he snorted. "Better? Yes, you've got a lovely view of mine and Bill's locker, your hands are still cold as ice, and it smells like…well, it smells like Quidditch, which doesn't really bother me, but I doubt you're enjoying to too much."
"Well, in spite of all that, I'm still having a good time." She lifted her head and smiled at him.
He looked at her skeptically. "If you say so," he muttered with a shrug.
They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, eating their soup quietly. Finally, James looked over at her. "Can I ask you something?"
"Sure," she replied, finishing off her chowder.
He looked pensive for a moment, as though trying to figure out how to correctly word his query. "How long did you like me before I asked you out?" he asked slowly, his cheeks reddening slightly though he didn't look away from her. "I mean, did you just realize it when I asked you or…"
Lily shook her head. "No, I figured it out on Halloween."
James' jaw dropped open. "Halloween?" he asked incredulously. "Really?" Lily nodded, amused by his reaction. "That's just so…ironic. I was going to tell you how I felt about you that night but then we got distracted and I didn't have another chance to…" A look of comprehension passed over his face as he relived the weeks since Halloween. "Is that why you started avoiding me?" She nodded, shame and regret swelling within her. "Why didn't you just tell me?"
Lily shrugged and looked at him guiltily. "I didn't think you liked me anymore," she explained in a small voice.
James looked at her as though she were crazy. "What on earth could possibly make you think that?"
"I thought you had moved on," Lily answered truthfully. "I thought you were dating Lexi…" James rolled his eyes and shifted in an irritated fashion. Lily continued speaking louder so that he wouldn't interrupt her. "I know you hated that I assumed that, but I did. And you can't blame me for thinking it either. Everyone thought you were dating. You acted like you were dating. You took her to the Slug Club party and the Halloween party and then she sat with us during meals and you were always running off to meet her somewhere. I didn't want to be all, 'Okay, I like you now!' when it seemed like you had finally moved on." She was quiet for a moment, her hands fidgeting in her lap as she revealed her innermost feelings and deepest motives for her insane actions over the last month. "And I felt ridiculous. I mean, all that time you had openly pursued me and then I was finally interested in you and you had moved on…it seemed like punishment for my own stubbornness. I felt like I deserved that pain and you deserved happiness, so I just let things happen."
James was silent, unsure of what to say to her confession. She was avoiding his eyes, watching her hands with a careful determination. He wanted to tell her that it didn't matter, that they were here now and that's all that was important. Instead, he moved his hand over hers and watched as her delicate fingers intertwined with his. "Better late than never," he murmured warmly once she finally looked up at him.
She was astounded by the emotion she saw peering out at her from the depths of his hazel eyes. She didn't understand what it was that she had ever done to deserve being looked at like that, but she never wanted it to go away.
The intensity of her own feelings were quickly becoming too much for her to handle. The warmth from the fire and even more from his touch was quickly overtaking her. Most of the room around them was fading away so that all she could focus on was James: his scent, his touch, his lips. She knew that she needed to say something else to keep her head above water; to be able to have some control over herself and her actions at all.
Swallowing loudly and forcing her eyes away from his, she asked, "So…you never felt anything for Lexi?"
"Nope," James said matter-of-factly with a simple shake of his head. "I mean, she's great, I know that. But she's a friend and that's it. She's easy to talk to and I think a lot of people wanted us to get together…but there wasn't any chemistry."
Lily grinned to herself, partly from hearing his proclamation and partly because she completely understood how he felt. Once she realized her feelings for him, it seemed like even the smallest spark with anyone else was impossible.
"I mean, I could spend the whole day talking to her and have a good time, but I never wanted to hold her hand," he continued, squeezing her hand. "I never wanted to brush a strand of hair out of her face or touch her cheek," he said as he pushed a lock of red hair behind her ear and let his fingertips slowly glance over her skin. "I never wanted to kiss her," he finished, his voice husky.
Lily looked up, her eyes wide and her heart speeding up considerably as she awaited his next action. He gave her a crooked smile and lifted their entwined hands and brushed his lips against the back of her hand. She grinned at him and let out a small sigh, trying to keep the miniscule amount of disappointment at bay that he had only kissed her hand.
"No, at the end of the day, there's only one girl I ever wanted, and that's you." Lily blushed a deep red, knowing that it would probably take them a little getting used to before they would be able to openly say how they felt about one another without blushing. "Wow…I sound really cheesy, don't I?"
Lily gave a small giggle. "Just a little bit," she teased, looking up at him with sparkling eyes. "But a girl needs to hear a little mushy stuff every once in a while."
"I'll keep that in mind," James said dryly before leaning back over to the picnic basket. "And now…dessert!" He handed her a fork and a napkin before pulling out two slices of strawberry cheesecake.
Lily's eyes lit up and she smiled in surprise. "My favorite!" she squealed and took her slice from a beaming James. "Did Blinky tell you?"
"No, I already knew it was your favorite," he said proudly before biting into his own piece.
"I knew there was a reason I agreed to go on this date with you," Lily quipped, grinning at him cheekily.
"Anything for cheesecake, huh?"
"Absolutely!" Lily said thickly through a large bite.
"I'll keep that in mind, too."
Lily gave him a calculating look. "Well…maybe not anything," she clarified. "But most things."
"Can I get an example of something you won't do for cheesecake?" James asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes that told her to proceed with caution.
"I won't kill anyone," she stated simply.
"Well," James began as he looked away from her, grinning like a madman, "murder wasn't exactly what I had in mind." He wiggled his eyebrows at her and then burst into laughter at the abashed look on her face. She clicked her tongue at him and then gave him a playful hit in the arm, shook her head and then went back to her cake.
"Well, I have another question for you," she said after a few moments of silence.
"Shoot," James replied, placing his clean plate back in the basket.
"You said I'm the only girl you want, right?"
"Yes…" he drawled, looking at her carefully.
"Well, my question for you is this." She paused for a moment, hoping that he was expecting another deep question. "What kind of a person kisses 'the only girl he wants' and then makes a reference to the time?" She grinned wickedly as he rolled his eyes and shook his head. "I mean, I'll be honest with you. I was there…I remember that kiss in excruciating detail and when we were finished, the time of day was probably the furthest thing from my mind."
James huffed and shook his head again. "I was trying to be a gentleman, okay?" She giggled, enjoying the fact that they were able to tease one another.
"You were trying to be a gentleman by not giving me what I wanted?" Lily continued skeptically.
"Yes. We were both exhausted and you were half asleep. Not three minutes earlier you'd been completely knocked out and drooling on my arm. For all I knew, you were still asleep! You could have been…I dunno, sleep-kissing!" he defended, though he couldn't keep a straight face as he uttered the last phrase.
"Sleep-kissing?" Lily giggled. "You're insane, you know that, right?"
James smiled and rolled his eyes before pushing himself up onto his feet. "Are you finished, yet?" he asked, holding out a hand to her to help her up.
Her face fell. "Oh no…is it over?" she asked, pouting, disappointment apparent on her face and in her voice. "I don't want it to be over yet," she murmured.
James tried to keep from grinning but couldn't manage it. He looked down at his hands for a brief second and bit the inside of his lip to keep from all out beaming. She grinned sweetly back at him, aware that her statement had been something of an answered prayer for him. He cleared his throat and looked back up. "Well, you're in luck then. Because there is still more date left." He held out his hand to her again and she took it happily.
"What about the dishes?" Lily asked as they walked toward the exit.
"I'll come back for them later," James answered, disinterested. As they approached the door, James suddenly halted and turned toward Lily. "Now, are you ready to get back out into the cold?" he asked in tones of mock seriousness. Lily nodded her head quickly and smile, but watched as James's demeanor changed from playful to serious. "Promise me you'll tell me if you get as cold as you were earlier." He pierced her with a protective and concerned look that normally would have irritated her independent streak and flared her temper, but under the circumstances (her extremely giddy emotions at his obvious display of affection) she just smiled and kissed him quickly on the cheek.
"I promise," she whispered before pulling all the way back away from him. Her lips tingled and her face was warm as she watched James's shocked face flush red.
He cleared his throat again, nodded his head, squeezed her hand gently, and pushed open the door and walked toward the lake and forest, pulling Lily along behind him. As the cold began sinking in again (though less bitterly than before because they were moving rather than sitting) Lily moved close to James. The sensation of being as close to him as she was did more for warming her up than their actual body heat.
James led them right up to the edge of the frozen part of the lake and stopped. He turned to grin at her. "Ever been ice skating before?"
Lily's eyes lit up and a huge smile formed on her face. "Seriously?"
"Yeah."
"Awesome!" Lily squealed, letting go of James's hand and pulling out her wand. She tapped it against her feet, expertly transfiguring her trainers into ice skates. Without waiting, she waddled through the snow and then began gliding atop the smooth, icy, lake surface. She closed her eyes and momentarily let the freeing sensation sweep over her. She'd always imagined when she was younger that this is what flying felt like as the wind whipped through her hair.
She opened her eyes and slowed to a stop in front of James who was still standing at the edge of the ice where she had left him. "Are you coming?"
"I dunno," James replied, a shy grin on his face. "I'm kind of enjoying the view."
Lily rolled her eyes but grinned in spite of herself as she skated a few steps backward. "My, we are cheesy today, aren't we?"
James shrugged but remained rooted in his spot. "Where'd you learn to skate?"
"There's a creek or stream or something that flows through the town I grew up in. There wasn't very much water in it though so it froze from October to March, sometimes April, and before I came to Hogwarts, Petunia and I would go ice skating every day after school and all day during Christmas break. I still go whenever I go home." He watched her glide effortlessly across the ice, her red hair fanning out behind her. "I practiced a lot which is why I am so good," she said with a wink. "Now come on! Get out here!" She skated up to him and pulled on his arm.
"Okay, but I'm warning you, I'm not very good at it," he said as he transfigured his shoes. He stepped out onto the ice shakily, his feet shifting dangerously beneath him. He reached out to keep his balance and Lily took the opportunity to slip her arm around his waist to steady him. He looked over to grin at her, but taking his eyes off of the ice was a bad idea. His skate hit a divot in the ice and he lost his footing. He tripped forward but then overcompensated and started falling backwards. Instinctively, he latched onto Lily to try and regain his balance while she tried to steady him. But nothing could stop the inevitable. James went crashing to the ice, his legs splayed out around him. Lily was inadvertently brought down as well, falling hard onto James's chest. His arms had constricted around her to keep her from rolling onto the ice. He was wincing as pain from the impact shot up his backside. Lily on the other hand, was laughing uncontrollably, tears beginning to leak out of the corners of her eyes.
"Are you okay?" she laughed as James released her and she pushed herself back up.
"Yeah, fine…just a little embarrassed," he admitted as he took the hand Lily offered and rose to his feet. He stayed stationary and rubbed the spots that were still stinging from the fall. Lily was still giggling as she slipped her hand into his and began propelling them forward at a very slow pace.
"You know," she began, turning so that she was facing him and skating backwards, "You surprise me, James. As much as you like showing off, I can't believe you chose something you're this bad at for our first date." She grinned slyly at him and giggled again as he rolled his eyes.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I have never, in my life, shown off." He kept his face straight but his eyes were twinkling with humor.
"Ha!" Lily snorted, disbelief obvious as she looked incredulously at him.
"Now Lily, is it really showing off if I am just awesome at everything I do?" he asked smugly. "Except for at ice skating…clearly," he added quietly as an afterthought.
"Yes," she answered quickly.
James let out of bark of laughter and shrugged. "Well, in that case, I guess I am guilty of showing off quite a bit." As he said this, the blade of his skate got caught in the ice again and he stumbled forward. Lily was ready and as James grabbed her shoulders, she set her feet and put her hands on his waist, steadying him until he had regained his footing. Neither of them moved their hands, but looked into the other's eyes, their faces close together. James had an embarrassed, pink tinge on his cheeks and Lily smiled slightly as she felt an electric shock shoot down her spine from the intensity of the gaze he was piercing her with now. She cleared her throat and looked down at the ice. James was quiet for a moment, but finally spoke up, saying, "Then again, being bad at this does seem to have its perks." Lily looked back up at him, a mischievous glint in his eyes and a crooked, playful smile on his lips.
"So you planned this?" Lily said as though it were a realization that was just hitting her.
"I'm not saying yes…but I'm not saying no either," James said mysteriously as Lily moved back to his side, giggling.
They skated for another forty-five minutes, James falling a total of seven times, taking Lily down with him three of those seven. The third one was the reason they decided to stop. As Lily fell, she threw her hands out behind her to break her fall, but her left hand came down on a jagged shard of ice which sliced it open. Blood trickled down her wrist and onto the ice, leaving a trail behind them as they made their way back to the edge where their wands lay.
James healed it with ease, but both decided that it was time to call it quits: Lily because she was starting to get cold again and James because he was mortified that he'd made Lily bleed on their date.
He was silent as they made their way back up to the castle. Lily, who was quite giddy with joy from the whole first date experience couldn't understand why James' demeanor had shifted so suddenly.
When they were about to reach the doors, she stopped him.
"Hey…what's wrong?" she asked, concerned that she'd done or said something she shouldn't have.
"Nothing," James answered mechanically.
"James, I'm not stupid. Tell me what's wrong," she persisted. He studied her momentarily, taking in the determined crease that had formed between her eyes and the way she had crossed her arms across her chest.
He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Fine. It's just…this date hasn't exactly turned out the way I'd planned," he explained reluctantly. Seeing the crease in her brow deepening, he elaborated. "I enjoyed myself, don't get me wrong. We could have just sat in the Common Room all afternoon and I would have loved it, but I just wanted it to be something special for you."
"James," Lily whispered gently, grinning sheepishly and taking a step toward him, "I had a wonderful time!"
"Oh yeah, I'm sure," James said sarcastically.
"I did!" Lily protested.
"Right! Which was your favorite part? When my big surprise just made me look stupid or when you nearly got frostbite because I made you sit outside? Or did you like eating on the floor of the Gryffindor changing room more? Or maybe when I cut you open, maybe that was the highlight of the date for you."
"Well when you put it like that it doesn't sound so hot, but I had a great time," she insisted, baffled by his stubborn disbelief.
"Look, you don't have to lie to make me feel better…"
"I'm not lying!" Lily interrupted, getting frustrated with him.
"Sure, sure…whatever you…" but he stopped talking because Lily had rolled her eyes, grabbed his sweater and pulled him down to her and caught his mouth with hers. He was caught momentarily off guard but didn't take long to recover. He wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her flush against his chest. Her hands moved slowly up, one arm snaking around his neck and the other resting lightly on his cheek.
Their kiss was slow, not frenzied like their first had been. He knew that this wasn't a onetime thing that may never happen again and so he took his time, memorizing the curve of her hip and the feeling of her erratic heartbeat against his chest. He wanted to remember always the way her fingers tangled themselves in his hair and the soft floral scent of hers. He moved his lips slowly against hers and each time she responded he felt as though fireworks were exploding in the pit of his stomach.
Though their last kiss had only been a week ago, Lily felt as though this were a completely new experience. This kiss, rather than a reaction to a dark, warm setting and pent up and suppressed emotions, was instead a way of making up for lost time and showing him that she felt the same things he was feeling. And…oh! How could she have forgotten in only six days how great a kisser James was? The feeling of his hands on her back and the way his lips tasted did more to warm her up than anything had since they'd left the castle earlier. She didn't want it to end, but when James pulled away, she knew that a chance to continue would present itself soon enough.
He leaned his forehead against hers and she let her hands drop from his neck and wrapped them around his waist. They were both breathing heavily, their chests rising and falling as they took deep breaths. They were silent for a moment, enjoying their embrace as their hearts slowed back down.
"Do you believe me now?" Lily asked quietly, a soft chuckle following her question. James nodded, his eyes full of emotion.
Lily swallowed and hesitated as she pulled away from him. She was dreading saying what she was planning on saying next. She'd been putting if off all day for fear that it would hurt James.
"Hey, can I talk to you about something?" she asked, avoiding his eyes.
"Yeah…" James drawled, picking up on the uncertainty in Lily's voice. His gaze was fixed on her intently and she wasn't sure if that made her feel better or worse.
"Well, I was thinking about this morning and how much fun I was having sneaking around…and I was thinking that maybe it's something we could keep doing." She was clearly nervous as she said this, her hands wringing anxiously in front of her. She peaked up to glance at his reaction.
"What do you mean?" James asked, feeling slightly puzzled. "Like…keeping us a secret?"
"Yeah!" Lily said brightly; too brightly.
"Why?"
"Well…think about it. We could sneak off, pretending to have Head business to take care of and then meeting up in empty classrooms or dark corridors instead," Lily described in her most persuasive voice. She felt ridiculous and embarrassed saying it out loud but watched as his face changed from skeptical to intrigued. "I think," Lily added quickly, "that it will help us with the transition from friends to more than friends."
"Well, I think we'd be fine in that aspect…but if you want to keep it a secret for now, I guess that's okay with me," he said, shrugging, after a few moments of contemplative silence. He didn't understand why she looked so relieved that he'd agreed, but he'd waited this long for her, and he was just happy that she wanted to date him that he didn't mind waiting a few more weeks for everyone to find out. "Besides…I think we should give this empty classroom business a try. It sounds interesting," he added with raised eyebrows. Lily blushed and hit him playfully on the arm. "Oh…but I did already tell Padfoot. I hope that's okay."
"Can he keep a secret?"
James nodded and smiled to himself. "Well, I'm going to go clean up the changing room," he said, kissing her quickly on the lips before walking away from her. "I'll see you in the Common Room in a few minutes. And what do you say? Want to 'study' later?" he asked with a wink.
Lily laughed, her heart still beating quickly from his brief, but extremely familiar gesture. "We'll see," she replied playfully. And with a final wave she turned to head back into the castle, a wide smile on her face which she felt confident wouldn't be gone for a long time.
A/N-And that, my friends, was the first date! I had so much fun writing this chapter. Lily and James just came alive for me as I was writing it. I typically try to keep them from saying anything too cheesy, but there were a couple of instances in this chapter when I couldn't help myself.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Also, I've really enjoyed your reviews. I try and reply to every review so if you didn't get a reply it means you either didn't sign in or you have blocked PMs.
Special thanks to kacauthemix. If you liked Lily giving James a hard time about saying "It's too late," you can thank her because she totally provided that! Thanks kacauthemix!