Life had been cruel with Rumplestiltskin many, many times, but this one, he felt like the ground beneath his feet had simply disappeared. He couldn't contain the anger inside himself and he spent a whole night awake staring at the fireplace, as he tried to fight against the tears that he refused to let fall from his eyes. The Dark One hadn't cried in a long time, not even when Cora broke his heart, but the force of Belle's betrayal was so strong, that it was impossible for him to control the rage.
He loved her. Rumplestiltskin loved Belle more than anything in his life, he trusted her, but she just wasn't able to trust him back and now, between all of their mistakes, there was child. Gods, he couldn't just believe it, he never meant it to happen, not even for a second, that was why he gave her the most powerful contraceptive potion he could have made. The Dark One had known about the prophecy for years now and when he started to get involved with Cora and the Seer predicted that she would only give birth to girls, he thought that he could have it all with her and never get to have the baby boy that was destined to be his destruction.
There was an important detail that differed Cora from Belle, and it wasn't the fact of which kind of children they were meant to have, because he never consulted the Seer about his wife, to ask if she saw a boy being born to them, but it was the love they felt for each other and the goodness in Belle's heart. He had never been truly in love for Cora and her heart had always been dark, they couldn't possibly create something good enough to extinguish the darkness.
But Belle, his darling wife was pure and kind, exactly like the prophecy mentioned. She could have lied to him, but deep down he knew that it was his own fault. Now, he had to step back, because he would be lost if he looked into the beautiful blue eyes of hers, copied in the small face a of a wee babe. He would surrender, love it and raise it until it was no longer a child, but a man willing to slay the beast he had as a father.
If that was a normal situation, he would be astonished, full of happiness, with the news of his wife's pregnancy, but it wasn't and the only thing he could feel was tormented and afraid, like coward he was. But as beastly as he felt at the moment he couldn't help, but also feel a terrible ache in his heart for the cruel words he had spitted at Belle about the child, because even if it was meant to kill him, right now it was just an innocent, caught in the middle of a storm.
Rumplestiltskin needed a lot of time to think about his next step, he didn't visit Belle for a week after their fight and even then, all he did was to keep wandering around the castle, too agitated to simply seat and spin some gold. He needed to find a way to fool the fate that had being traced for him and his son, or he would have to do something drastic about that situation and Belle would hate him forever. Of course, he had his backup plan, but he wasn't willing to use it and he would like very much to just be a good father for the child that was to be born.
He even managed to sit himself with face buried in his hands, begging to the gods that Belle please gave him a daughter, so it all could be forgotten, but he knew that even if there was someone listening his pleadings, the person wasn't going to do anything about it, not for him, the monster that locked his wife in a tower and rejected his baby.
But now, after being his weakest, the Dark One was in control of himself again, walking through the grey corridors of Regina's castle, hearing the voices in his head make fun of him, about his immense remorse over his attitudes with Belle, telling him that she would have a little demon in her arms in no time, that the thing would be so dark that it wouldn't even look human. He shooked his head, trying to concentrated in what he had come there for and opening the door to the Evil Queen's chambers.
She was looking at herself in a mirror, brushing her hair with care. Crossing his arms, he cleaned his throat to call her attention and Regina turned to him with a sided-smile, when she noticed the frown on his face.
"Someone doesn't seem to be in his best humour," the queen mocked, standing up. "What happened?"
"None from your business," Rumplestiltskin quickly replied in his most harshly tone. "I have better things to do, so if you did not call me here for what I wanted, then I'm going away."
They had been working together for months, both wanting something they couldn't reach without the help of the other. And that was what deals were for, making sure they strictly got what they wanted and nothing more.
Regina smiled lazily in an almost annoyed way as she adjusted the sleeves of her black dress. Rumple had no time for her silliness today, he still had a lot to think and the anticipation of finally getting what he was waiting for, made his nose wrinkle in anxiety. After a long moment of hesitation, the Queen finally made a movement with her hand and a purple cloud of smoke, brought a young blonde girl to the room, eyes wide in panic, hands cuffed and her green dress in rags.
"Fine," Regina said. "Here she is."
"Finally," Rumplestiltskin breathed, approaching the blonde and going to stand behind her, checking for the scars that should be there.
He withdrew the collar of her dress, just enough to look at them and the girl tossed to free herself from him.
"Get away from me," she spitted.
The imp stepped back, just not because she asked for, but because he had a question for Regina.
"Are you sure that she knows where to find her?"
"Of course, she does," the Evil Queen assured. "Now I want my part of the exchange."
Taking off a small bottle from his coat's inner pocket, he placed it on Regina's hands. The solution of her problems, she hoped, just like the girl could be the solution of his, if only she had the right information.
"Our deal is over," he bounced at the Queen.
The blonde was desperately trying to free herself from the cuffs, which Rumple thought to be slightly amusing, as all of them knew that only magic could take it off and the girl had none of it anymore.
Regina walked towards him, glancing between the two of them. "Will you share with me your plans for Green?"
"It's Tinkerbell," the fairy screamed.
"Who cares?" Regina returned.
Tipping his fingers together, he gave the Queen an expressionless glance, trying not to show how much agony he was feeling, because it had been really long, since Rumplestiltskin felt like one of the desperate souls that seek him and he didn't like to be in this position. He felt weak and right now, that was the only thing he couldn't be.
"Let's just say that she will be more useful, than the last fairy I caught," he explained standing in front of the blonde with threatening eyes and a dangerous voice. "So, tell me, Green, where can I find the Blue Fairy?"
"You can't," Tinkerbell answered in a petulant tone. "The fairy's place is hidden and only people with a pure heart can enter there. You will never find her, Dark One."
Grunting furiously, he waved his hand and the fairy's eyes rolled back, before she fainted in front of Regina's astonished expression. He vanished from there, appearing back to his castle, inside the secret tower, where the Seer was locked.
His breath was coming hard with anger and he wanted to break the whole place, but he needed to keep searching, he needed to find the Blue Fairy and make her reverse the situation or bring her to damnation with him. Either way, she would suffer. But just for now, he would relish in getting anything that could give himself some hope.
He stepped closer to the cage, lifting the Seer up with his magic.
"What do you want from me today, Rumplestiltskin?" She inquired.
"I want to know if my wife is the one that shall bear the child destined to kill me."
The seer smiled, enjoying to know how tortured he was.
"Lights she might be, pure and true."
"You've already told me this many times. I want something concrete, just like what you told me about Cora," he yelled. "Will the baby be a girl?"
"You know, the future is always foggy," the Seer said. "I see your wife holding a heathy child. That's all."
Rumplestiltskin let her fall to the floor with a muffled noise.
"You're useless."
"And you won't reign as the Dark One forever," she mocked.
Then, he left her alone, retiring to his own chambers, where he could start to think about another way to fool the fate.
Belle had never felt so concerned in her whole life as she did during the horrible two weeks that followed her argument with her husband. He really locked her in there with no real intention of ever seeing her. She had become so usual to crying her heart out, that the tears didn't even came anymore, leaving her wonder what the future had reserved for her and if it would ever allow her some happiness.
Her ultimate preoccupation was her child and what might happen to it. Belle couldn't just convince herself that it was meant to kill Rumple and she could only get more affectionate to the child. She watched the bump grow as the days went by, with the certainty that the babe would be healthy and strong, sometimes wondering if it would inherit its father's magic or thick greenish skin. It wouldn't matter to her, not as long as both could be safe.
The sickness Belle felt, however, wasn't willing to pass. She drank lots of tea and ate mostly nothing, even though it started to make her feel weak and dizzy, which got her spending more time in bed than doing anything else. A pile of book of books, laid down in her nightstand, just at her reach, so she could read aloud when she wasn't feeling so distressed and bring herself some distraction.
That night however, she couldn't read, she kept petting her belly nervously with a lump on her throat as she felt a panic attack arriving. Her mind worked quickly with a million different questions, but the greatest of all, insisting in make her guess if Rumple would keep her locked in there for the rest of her pregnancy or the rest of her life. She wanted him to come there, so she could apologize and assure him that everything was going to be alright.
The girl would take his hand in hers and press it to the place where their child was growing, reminding him that it was made of their love and would be a great joy in their lifes. But she knew him well enough to be sure that that he wasn't going to swallow his pride and do it so soon, if someday he would actually come. Belle felt afraid that he would never want to see the baby and would just forget about them in that tower like he did with the other prisoners.
Sliding off of the bed, she walked to her dresser and picked the magic mirror, knowing that like in every other night she would only see the darkness, however what Belle stopped in the surface, was something that she surely wasn't expecting. A woman's face.
"Belle?" Fiona questioned, startled.
"How can you see me?"
"I have another linking mirror hidden with me, quite smaller than yours, but still works," she answered with a sigh. "I've been using it to hear the things that happen in your chambers for quite a while now. And I'm sorry for what happened between Rumplestiltskin and you."
In any other occasion she would have stormed at Fiona for invading her privacy, as only gods knew what that woman could have heard, but the truth was that Belle was too wrecked to even complain about that. She went back to bed, holding the mirror grateful to have someone to talk for once.
"I need to protect my child," Belle whispered. "Please, tell me what you know about the prophecy."
"I know that fate can't be chanced and your child is likely to be the boy of the prophecy," Fiona said. "You should have taken the potion."
That certainly would have made things easier. Maybe if she had drank the potion, her relationship with Rumple could have evolved enough for them to trust each other and end the secrets, so they could have analysed the prophecy together and get to someplace where a pregnancy wouldn't be unwelcome and they could form a family.
"I couldn't," she admited, worrying at her lip. "Do you think that he will kill both of us?"
"Rumplestiltskin?" The other woman laughed weakly. "Oh, please, he would never do such a thing."
"You haven't seen how mad he was. He hates me and he hates the child. I'm afraid."
Belle had been truly frightened of Rumplestiltskin twice, first when they go married and she had no idea of who he was and second, the night he found out that she was having his baby. He was so angry that she really feared for her own life.
"You should be," Fiona warned. "But I don't think Rumplestiltskin will ever harm any of you, he would rather die than hurting someone he loves."
But he doesn't, an insistent part of her echoed in her mind, he doesn't love any of you, or he would have chosen to fight for this family. She breathed in, analysing Fiona for a second, thinking that she definitelly seemed to have too much acknowledge about the Dark One's life choices for a prisoner.
"How do you know him so well?"
"I don't," she quickly replied.
"Fiona, do you think that he might try to get rid of just the baby then?" Belle inquired, worriedly. "I've heard stories of women that drank special teas to bleed until there was no child growing inside them anymore."
At this point Belle didn't know what to expect anymore, but the idea of losing her baby made coldness settle heavy in her heart, bringing a despair she hadn't yet known. That child was important to her and she had to consider every possibility so she could prepare to defend herself if it needed be. She didn't want to believe that the man she loved was capable of doing something like this, for the sake of the baby, she had to prevent herself.
However, Fiona that so seemed to hate her when they met, was now trying to calm Belle down, her voice a sweet assurence of hope.
"I may not know Rumplestiltskin very well, I but I'm sure that he is not the kind of monster that would so such a thing. As I said, he cares for you," the prisoner guaranteed. "And anyway, you're too long into this pregnancy, the baby is already strong and if you drank something to get rid of it, you die as well."
Belle's face went pale, but she had her eyes glued on Fiona's brown ones and the pain present in there was so big that she couldn't just ignore.
"Why does that seem to hurt you so much?" The girl asked, curiously, because the ups and downs of her life weren't supposed to affect anyone but her.
"A long time ago I had a child myself, but I lost it," Fiona told her and the princess felt an enormous pity and compassion. "Care for yours, Belle, but go very far away from here in the first opportunity you have, because father and son facing each other is not something you will ever want to see."
Sighing, Belle nodded, taking the advice from mother to mother. She had to do what was best for her child, even if that meant never seeing Rumplestiltskin again.