A/N: Woohoo, thanks for the reviews/favorites/alerts/etc. Means alot. (:

So yeah, this chapter's a bit short. Annnnd I dont rly know how I feel about it. It's kinna eh.

But the song featured on here is called If You Wonder by Jeff Bernat.

*READ/REVIEW!

Disclaimer: I dont own BTR.

Happy Reading.

- Christina's POV -

After I was released from the hospital, I was directed to at least take a week or two off from work to slowly get back into my normal schedule again. I liked the sound of it, relaxing before jumping back into my old life again.

It was worse after I got out of the hospital though. Everyone treated me as if I was born yesterday.

"Watch your step, watch your step." Logan held onto my arm as I stepped over the curb, leading into the parking lot. "There you go, babe. That's it."

"Babe. Seriously?"

"Shh, better safe than sorry!" He said in his nerdy voice.

"Woah woah woah, wait Car coming!" Rodney yelled from behind us, making the others yell various warnings as well. I looked up. It was LEAVING the parking lot.

"You guys, its not even coming here."

"What in the world is up with this attitude, young lady?" Logan's squeaky voice came out. I chuckled as he opened the car door for me and hopped into the driver's seat. My mom and Dad advised Amanda to stay with me until I got back on track, so we headed back to me and Logan headed back to my apartment while Felicia and Rodney took her to get some clothes.

"Here's a plastic bag if you ever feel dizzy and need to .. withdraw.." Logan said as he focused on the road. My eyes widened and I shook my head. Seriously?

When we got to my apartment, Logan held onto me as we took each step again and the others surrounded me as we took the elevator up to my room. They opened the door for me, seeing that my apartment was as clean as it was before everything happened.

"Sit, sit.." Logan helped me sit onto the couch. "There you go, sweetie." I rolled my eyes at him and reached for the remote. "NOT TOO FAST BEFORE YOU GET DIZZY!"

"BABE IM FINE." He pouted and sat on the couch next to me.

Although the support was craaaazy, and I loved every bit of it. I wouldnt have asked for a better family to get through this with.

"You know damn well you a worthless piece of shit. Logan aint gonna save you, & even if he tries, he's just going down with you."

Bam.

I woke up in the middle of the night, sweating as I sat up from a nightmare. Little things from that one day replayed in my head as the night approached and well, it was getting tiring.

"Christina, stop thinking about it and go to sleeep." She groaned under the covers.

"Im not even thinking about it Amanda, it's just there in my head.." I said softly. She threw the covers off her head and ran her hand through her hair before hugging me.

"Come on, lets just go back to sleep. It's gonna be okay." She snuggled onto me and she fell right back asleep. As for me, it wasn't working. I picked up my phone and texted Logan, since.. he HATED me calling him.

Baabe.. :'( Bad Dream.

I waited for a bit and after awhile, I realized he might've been in a deep sleep, so I set my phone down.

Buuuzzz.

Aw my baby. I'm here for you. =(

I smiled until I realized he was calling.

"Hello?" I quietly said.

"Hey cutie. Go back to sleep." He sleepily said in his raspy voice.

"I'll try."

"No.. I promise it'll be fine."

"Mmm, okay." It was silent. Then he started to slowly sing to me.

Why I love to give you flowers on a Wednesday, 12 dozen roses at your door.

Or even light some candles when you come over for dinner, I wouldn't mind to light a billion more.

Or how I like to wake up and see you with no make up, I'd still give you a ring the way you are.

Or stay up on the phone late at night when you're alone, looking out the window gazing up at stars.

So if you're wondering why I do the things that I do, honestly I don't know what to say.

All these questions and answers, I just like to have her, every moment every single day.

Why I love to hold you even in the public, you could call it lovely PDA.

I don't care what city, you could pick out of the 50 states like California in the bay.

Or how I like to take you to church on every Sunday, holding hands together as we pray.

I dont care if people hate, I dont care what people say, cause my love for you will always be the same.

So if you're wondering why I do the things that I do, honestly I don't know what to say.

All these questions and answers, I just like to have her, every moment every single day.

I started to get drowsy. "Goodnight Babe." He said. I yawned and returned the favor. My boyfriend was the sweetest.

The next morning quickly came.. well at least to me it did, I felt like i slept for 5 minutes. I looked over and saw that it was about to be 11. I got up to shower, realizing Amanda was alrdy up and watching tv outside. After my shower, I put on ripped skinny jeans, uggs, a black and dark grey off the shoulder shirt and a beanie. My hair air dried and it was pretty wavy, so I left it the way it was. I walked outside to see Amanda eating a bowl of cereal, still in her pajamas and watching tv.

"What time did you get up?"

"At like 7. I woke up and couldnt get back to sleep." She pouted and continued to eat.

"Jesus."

"What're you doing today to be dressed up like that?"

"I think I'm gonna visit Logan at the studio. My turn to spoil him for a bit." I smiled to myself. I poured myself a small bowl of cereal and watched TV with Amanda for a bit until I figured it was time to head to the studio.

"Now are you sure you're okay to drive?"

"Yes babygirl. I'll call if anything."

"Mkay. i love you."

"i love you too." I made sure the door was securely closed and headed to my car. The studio was about a 15 minute drive from my apartment complex. I stepped out of the car and headed straight up to the studio.

"Oh hey, Christina. How are you feeling?" Freight Train greeted me as he was walking around the halls.

"Greaat. It's good to see you again Freight Train."

"It sure is. I'm glad you're okay. If you ever need me to stay and watch your place, give me a call." I laughed and patted him on his chest before walking deeper into the studio. No one was around, But I did hear Gustavo yelling in his office. I couldnt help but get closer to the door to hear the conversation. Oh god, I was taking after the guys' nosy ways.

"What? More Harmonies and dancing! We've been doing that for so long!"

"Yeah but you should've expected it! We told you guys after Christina got out of the hospital that you were going on tour next week!" Kelly yelled at them.

Tour? What tour...

"All you need to do is get it together, and pull through for this 3 month tour. After that, you guys get to rest as much as you want!" Kelly added. They continued to whine until Gustavo rose his voice.

"DOGS PLEASE. NOT NOW." They didnt stop. "AH, GOD. KELLY, PLEASE. BRING THEM TO THE BOOTH WHEN THEY'RE RDY." With that, the door flew open. "Oh hello, Christina. Glad to see you're doing fine." Gustavo smiled and walked away. I gave Gustavo a fake toothless smile and looked into the room to see the guys eyeing me and then Logan. He had the 'Im sorry I didnt tell you sooner' look.

Tour alrdy? Why so quick? I just got out of the hospital and they were sending him away alrdy?

"Babe, Look.. I can explain-"

"It's fine. I get it. Have fun on tour." I said with a fake smile. I wiped the tears coming down my face and hurridly walked out of the studio and to my car. Logan yelled for my name, but I ignored it. More tears coming down my face. Before he could get to me, I quickly drove off and went back home. I opened the door to see Amanda sleeping in my bed again. I closed the bedroom door, sat on the couch and started crying.

Call me selfish, but I didnt want him to go on tour right away. Not now. Not when I was still recovering and when I still needed him. Going on tour meant less conversations, more work, more pretty girls and no Logan to physically be with me. for Three whole months.

About an hour passed when I heard my door opening. I gripped onto the couch, scared of who it might be.

"Christina.." A soft voice came before I saw those brown puppy dog eyes peer into the room and at me. I looked up at Logan as he closed the door. I got up and tried walking to my room but he grabbed my wrist. "Dont. Talk to me please..." He turned me to face him. I took my wrist away and my lips started trembling as the tears fell. "Im sorry babe.. I knew I should've told you earlier, but I didn't want to right after you got out of the hospital. Please.. I wasnt trying to hide it from you. I just never knew when the right time was.. I didnt want you to find out this way." His puppy dog eyes and soft tone drew me in. He knew he won. He pulled me into a hug. I gripped onto his sides as one arm was behind my head and the other around my waist. His cheek rested onto my head and he planted kisses on my head to make me stop crying.

"Babe i dont want you to go.."

"I dont either, but I have no choice."

"But-but, I just got out of the hospital, you cant just go-" I started rambling and he shook his head. He grabbed my face with his hands and planted a passionate kiss on my lips to make me stop.

"Babe, I know. Everything you're feeling right now, I'm feeling too .. trust me. But I rly, rly, have no choice." I looked up at him. He was being honest. I nodded and dug my head onto the crook of his neck. "I promise we'll get through it okay? I'll text you, call you, facetime with you every chance I get. I'm not neglecting you at all." I nodded again as he rocked me to stop crying.

"Will you be back by Christmas?" I pulled back a bit to face him again. He had a regretful look on his face.

".. I dont know.. I hope.. But I cant gaurantee it.." More tears fell. "Babe please stop crying... I'll be back before you know it."

"It's not the same."

"I know."

"I still need you to help me get through this."

"I'm still gonna be here, every step of the way. Just not physically for awhile. Babe please... You have to understand this wasnt my choice. Neither was it Kendall's, Carlos', James' or Rodney's." He was right. I nodded and he kissed me on my forehead. "And everyday I have to spend with you before I go, I'll take advantage of it. These next few days, just me and you, okay? Well.. after studio time.." I chuckled, making him smile. "I love you, babe. That'll never change."

"I love you too."

It'd be great if I could get more reviews. (: It'll make me happy!