On His Own

Lord Grantham stood by the window in the Imperial Bedroom of Downton Abbey two days before Christmas 1915 watching his son-in-law sleep. The younger man's blonde hair fell away from his face in a messy pile and predominant black circles colored the bottoms of his eyes. His face had taken on a hollow look and his once robust physique was a good twenty pounds lighter. "He looks like a naughty child that has been sent to bed without his supper," Lord Grantham thought. "He's so young. They're both so damn young." He glanced out the window at the grey clouds that were about to let go another rainstorm at any moment. When he turned back he saw his son-in-law's eyes were open and watching him.

Tom Branson woke when he sensed someone was in the room. He was not a heavy or a late sleeper but his recent bought of pneumonia had left him weak. He was sleeping almost constantly and even short periods out of bed left him dead tired. His wife had assured him repeatedly that he would regain his strength but it would take time. This morning he spotted his father-in-law standing by the window as he came conscious. He stirred and tried to push himself up without much luck.

"Is there something you wanted, Lord Grantham?" he asked. Tom was used to calling his father-in-law milord, but his pride wouldn't allow him to say that word. Not after the way he had spoken to Sybil and him when they had announced their marriage.

"I thought we should have a talk without the women present."

"As you wish," Tom said. "Though I would prefer to speak to you when I am dressed."

"Fine," said Lord Grantham looking somewhat perturbed. "Meet me in the library in half an hour if you can manage it."

Once Lord Grantham left the room Tom got up and dressed. He was marginally better than the last time he had attempted to get fully dressed as he managed to get his cloths on and do up his tie before he had to sit down to rest. It was coming on lunchtime and Sybil would not be back from her nursing duties at the hospital until late that afternoon. If he was going to have it out with her father, he might as well do it when Sybil wouldn't walk in and catch him. His wife had had enough upsets at the hands of her family this last while as far as he was concerned.

Tom made his way down the stairs. He didn't see any of the staff about this morning, which was a good thing. The only one he had seen since they had announced their marriage was Anna. She had given him a good scolding before his wife had walked in and caught her there. Otherwise they delivered the meals to his room and picked up the trays without a word.

He had to stop and rest in the great hall once he got to the bottom of the stairs. He stared towards the library dreading the exchange that was about to come but knowing it had to happen. After a few minutes he had caught his breath, stood and squared his shoulders and walked into the library.

"You wanted to see me, Lord Grantham?" Tom said.

"Yes, come in."

Tom walked into the middle of the room and stood where he could grab the back of a chair if he had to. Lord Grantham turned towards him and laid down his pen.

"I wanted to know what you were thinking when you married my daughter," Lord Grantham said.

"I was thinking how much I love her and want to make her happy," Tom said not taking his eyes off Lord Grantham.

"I see. You never once thought about how you are ruining her life?"

"I'm not ruining her life," Tom said trying to keep his temper. "Did it ever occur to you that Sybil is with me because it makes her happy?"

"A strange kind of happiness married to a servant."

"I'm not a servant anymore. I have a job at a paper arranged for next month. I'm not afraid to work. When my health gets better I will apply to a larger paper."

"You're ambitious. I can make it worth your while to walk away. The marriage can be annulled. No one will be harmed. I'll be generous."

Lord Grantham pulled out his checkbook from the desk and began to write.

"What did you say?" Tom said somewhat incredulously.

"I said, I'll be generous. Name your price."

"I see," said Tom. "It may surprise you to know, Lord Grantham, that there are others besides you and your class who are honorable. Nothing will make me break my vows to your daughter. We are married for the rest of our lives and nothing you can do will change that." Tom was rapidly loosing strength from the stress of confronting his father-in-law and grabbed the back of a chair for support. "Further more," he continued. "If you were so concerned for Sybil's happiness you would have encouraged her in going to college instead of deriding her for it. Your attitude hurt her. All she really wants is your approval and yet you keep withholding it from her. What kind of father are you?"

"How dare you?"

"I'm not speaking to you now as an employee. When it comes to my wife and her happiness I will dare to say whatever I please!"

"I want you to leave this house as soon as you are able."

"Nothing would make me happier than to leave today, but it isn't possible. We both know that."

Lord Grantham looked at Tom for a long minute before he tore up the check, turned and strode out of the room. Tom let out the breath he was holding and sat down heavily in the nearest chair. Isis came to him and wagged her tail.

"Well at least you're happy I'm here," Tom said patting her on the head. "You're maybe the only one." The tears were forming in the corners of his eyes and rolled down his cheeks to fall on the furry head. His long illness, confinement and opposition to their marriage were taking their toll. He was trying his best to do the right thing by his wife, but it wasn't easy. He still hadn't heard back from his family. He could just imagine the reaction when they found out he had married a Protestant. At the moment he felt as though he had been thrown into a brick wall that he would never find his way around.

"What are you doing here?" Edith said as she walked into the library. "Sybil will have a fit if she finds out you were up when you should be resting."

Tom didn't look up. He didn't want her to see that he had been crying.

"I've been talking to your father."

"I bet that was fun," Edith said sarcastically. "Papa can be a absolute troll when he puts his mind to it."

Edith could see the glimmer of wet on Tom's cheeks and wanted to tactfully give him a moment to wipe it away.

"I'm just going to go hang up my coat. Then maybe I could come back and we could have a chat," she said. "I haven't had a chance to properly welcome you to the family."

Tom just nodded as he continued to pat the dog. As soon as Edith left the room he wiped his face with his handkerchief and got some water from the drink cart. When Edith came back into the room she crossed to the sofa and sat down.

"You mustn't mind Papa and Granny," she said. "They are both set in their ways. Mary is just like them at times."

"What should I call you? I can't very well go around calling my sister-in-law "Milady".

"Lady Edith will do just fine. I would prefer just Edith, but if Papa heard you it would just add fuel to the fire I'm afraid. I for one am quite glad you and Sybil are married. I have never seen her look so happy as when she is with you. Even when you were so terribly ill, you could tell how much she cares for you."

"Thank you for saying so. You're the only one so far who hasn't given me what for."

"Why would I? I know better than anyone what this life is like and how it feels to want to do something else. Sybil said you encouraged her to go to nursing school. I doubt she could have done it without your support. I know I won't be able to do anything on my own. It's much more difficult than most people realize."

"Don't count yourself out, Lady Edith. You've learned to drive. That's more than other people around here have done."

Edith regarded her brother-in-law for a few minutes.

"You know now that you mention it, it was you who taught me to drive and wouldn't give up no matter how badly I was doing. Sybil said you were incredibly kind. Now I see what she meant."

Tom turned bright red.

"I was just doing my job," he said.

"Well, I never thanked you. Now I am, but I still think there is no hope for me."

"There is always hope. Just find what you like and do it. You will survive your family's expectations. Sybil made a different way and no one has disowned her yet. There is room for change."

"You are rather a rebel on a personal level," Edith said with a sigh. "I'll think about it. It is nice to have someone around here that thinks differently. Mary and I are always at odds. I did something to her once that I regret, but there is no way to mend that."

"Forgive me for saying this, but did you tell her your sorry. You might find it goes a long way."

"You sound like the Reverend Travis."

"Do I? I'm sure the saints will be turning in their graves," Tom said with a glint of his old self in his eyes.

Edith allowed a small smile to cross her face.

"Why don't you come in to luncheon with me. There is no sense going all the way back up stairs just to have your lunch alone."

"I'm not sure the rest of your family would welcome me."

"Don't be silly. You'll be here for Christmas. You can tell me what I should get Sybil for a gift. I don't have a clue."

"Alright," Tom said feeling somewhat heartened at having at least one member of the family treat him as though he belonged. He got up and offered Edith his arm as they walked to the dining room.

"There's no way I can go get her a gift. Perhaps we could get her one together. Just the other day Sybil mention how much she needed a ..."

The two of them showed up in the dining room together to a show of raised eyebrows around the table.

"I'm surprised to see you downstairs, Tom," Lady Cora said.

"He was down for a bit and I thought he should come through to lunch," Edith said. "You must be going crazy up there all alone."

"It's a bit tedious, but I'm not up that much," Tom said.

"Well, just don't over do things," Lady Cora said. "Now come and take a seat beside me."

Lord Grantham could only give Tom a dirty look with the other's present. Mary was out for the day.

"You said you have a job lined up in York," Lady Cora inquired. "What type of job is it?"

Tom spent the next while telling Lady Cora and Edith about the position he had waiting at the newspaper. To their surprise, he seemed to know exactly which spoon and fork went with what and never made an error at the table. The small detail was not lost on Lord Grantham either who remained silent during the meal. Carson glared at Tom but remained dutifully silent throughout the luncheon.

Immediately after lunch Tom made his excuses and headed back upstairs. He was visibly failing and Edith walked him back to his room.

"He is an odd fellow, isn't he?" Lord Grantham commented.

"A bit of an enigma, but you can tell he adores Sybil."

"Yes, quite. I'll leave the Christmas arrangements to you, my dear. I have no idea what to do with him."

"It will all work out, Robert," Lady Cora said as she got up to head into town and meet with her mother-in-law.