Okay, so I had some time and energy to write, so I'm writing this directly after chapter 10. I don't really know what your response is going to be.

Hey, so if you like Cade, just hold on! It's going to come in the future, at least, I hope. I've planned for it to.

Also, have you heard Want U Back by Cher Lloyd? It's the PERFECT Bade song from Jade to Beck. If you haven't heard it listen to it, and keep that in mind.

I woke up to Tori screaming. I don't like screaming, and I'm not sure anybody does. Except for famous people if the screaming is for them.

She runs upstairs to get me, and I fly out of bed like someone had pressed an eject button. Her eyes are full of tears nearly begging to spill over the edge, but clearly she's trying to contain them. "We have to call 911 now," she says breathlessly. "It's Jade."

My mouth opens in shock, but I'm frozen. "What... what happened?" I whisper.

"WE HAVE TO CALL 911 NOW!" she screams again, in my face. I can't move, though, I just keep standing, wondering what must have happened to Jade. A lot of terrible things could of happened.

Then she shoves me, and it startles me, because Tori would never push anyone under a normal circumstance. I run over to where I left my PearPhone, which was luckily in my pocket when my Mom kicked me out. Tossing it to her, I leave the room plugging my ears. I hate 911 calls.

I've only had to call 911 once, and that was because my brother spilled boiling water all over himself. He's okay now. The man on the other end was super-serious and it scared me and made me cry. I was afraid I would say something or do something wrong.

I realize that it's very early, maybe 2 or 3 in the morning. We have school tomorrow, right? Tori's parents said that they weren't coming back until noon today; they had an overnight conference about Trina to go to. They had a long sit-down talk with us about what was and wasn't to be done while they were gone. I got the message.

There's blood on the kitchen floor.

I can't really see all the way in, but I can see blood all over the floor, and I don't want to look further. I freeze in place, not wanting to move at all, stunned. "Jade?" I whisper. "Jade-y?"

Nothing happens. I find my feet taking me forward, even though I don't want to see. I don't want to, but it's like I'm not even in my own body; everything is white-ish in my vision.

Jade's not even there.

It's another girl in a mess of blood, and it looks like Jade and it must have been Jade at some point, but this girl is lifeless. I don't even know if she's alive.

The cuts on her wrists made all this blood? Seems like it. There's a knife just out of her reach, as if it fell when she lost consciousness. Why? WHY? WHY?!

Tori comes out from the stairwell just in time for me to double over and vomit in the middle of the living room. She runs up to me and holds my hair back as I heave for a second time, choking on vomit rising from my throat. It burns and makes me sputter. "Oh, Cat," she whispers, and I wipe my mouth off on my shirt and Tori holds me on the couch.

I start to cry and she rocks me back and forth. "What did I do?" I sob, and my tears run all down my neck. "I didn't mean to kill her."

"Shh," Tori whispers, and I realize that she's crying too. "Help will be here, and Jade will be all okay."

"Jade is dead," I whimper.

"No, they can still save her," Tori tells me. "Shh. Shhh, you're okay. Calm down." I can't stop crying, and when the ambulance people bust through the door I'm in a daze. I can't think. They push past me and the vomit on the floor and take the lifeless little girl away quickly, putting her on a piece of white paper covering a stretcher.

It all happens so fast. The men ask lots of questions, but only Tori answers. I can't open my mouth; it's like it's stuck with glue. They tell us to come in the ambulance with Jade, but Tori says no. She called her parents, and they're leaving immediately and should be back in an hour. "Cat's in mental shock," Tori tells them, and I don't know what that means.

Tori talks for awhile, but my hearing goes suddenly and I can't hear or talk. I just stand there, frozen, for so long until Tori grips my hand and sits me on the couch. Everyone leaves, and we're alone. She asks me something, and I can't nod or do anything. I don't want to; I don't want to answer stupid questions.

My hearing fades back in a little bit, and Tori asks me if I need to sleep. My friend is in life danger; I can't sleep! No! But when she leads me up the stairs I realize that I'm about to faint and lose consciousness. I buckle onto the bed, and I know I'm unconscious but I can still think in my mind. The picture of Jade in my head won't go away; it stays there. I still see all the blood; I still see Jade all twisted and mangled on the floor.

When I wake up nothing makes sense. Why am I in Tori's bed, and where's Jade? Tori's holding my hand and it's clear that she's been crying very hard. Did something happen while I was asleep? "Tori, why are you holding my hand? Where's my girlfriend?"

"You broke up with her," Tori mutters. "Remember?"

Tori's lying and it makes me angry. "I would never break up with Jade, EVER," I shoot defensively. "I love her so much! Where is she?"

"What day is it?" Tori asks me.

"It's Sunday," I remind her. "Jade and I spent the night last night, remember? We came because we were staying behind the gas station?"

Tori lets out a breath like something's very wrong. She seems stressed out. "Cat, try to think," she tells me. "Try to think back. Think hard. I don't know how to explain this, but you've forgotten an entire day. It's Monday," she tells me. "Jade got very hurt last night."

"What happened?" I ask, eyes wide. I'm concerned. I love Jade; she's my girlfriend. Tori's still holding my hand, though, and I pull away because I'm afraid that Jade will get mad if I'm holding hands with another girl.

"I have to find a trigger," she mumbles.

"Trigger? Like on a gun?" I gasp, and it makes me want to cry. "Did Jade get shot by a gun?"

"I read a book on this," Tori says aloud. "You have to find the right trigger. It differs from person to person." She takes a deep breath. "Cat, do you remember the ambulance's siren?"

"What? Yeah, I know what a siren sounds like, why?"

"No, that's no going to work," she tells me. "What about... do you remember the knife? It was inches from Jade's hand."

It's not April Fools Day, because I would know if it was April Fool's Day. That means that Tori is a liar, liar, pants on fire. I jump out of the bed, away from her. "There was lots of blood.."

As soon as she says blood, I see a picture in my mind. Jade, all twisted up on the floor. It's like it was from a dream, but slowly memories start to flood back to me. People rushing in, me throwing up...

"That worked," Tori says breathlessly. She then walks up to me and gives me a hug. "It's okay, Cat. You're going to be okay. Everything's going to be fine."

I hug her back so hard and I want to never let go. We stand for a long time hugging, and I feel Tori start to cry against me, her shoulders moving up and down. I don't do anything, though, until the door bangs open and Mr. Vega screams, "GIRLS! ARE YOU OKAY?"

Tori and I run downstairs, and she can't say anything, she just starts crying. She falls into Mr. Vega's arms, and Ms. Vega runs to the kitchen. "Where is Jade now? Should we go to the hospital?" The spotlight's on me.

I begin to cry too, and Ms. Vega takes me in her arms. She's not my mom, but she's comforting, and she rubs my back. "It's okay, honey. What happened to Jade?"

"Cat can't remember about anything from earlier. She passed out, and she was and still is in mental shock," Tori says, pulling away from her Daddy's chest. "She went to the hospital."

"I'm not ready to see her," I say, and I know it makes me sound scared, but I don't know what Jade will say. "I don't want to go."

Tori nods, and she comes over and takes me away from her mom. She looks into my eyes. "If you're not ready, I won't go either." She takes a deep breath. "Now, we're just going to wait."

Yeah, who cares about school?