A very quiet and pale Byakuya was sitting a row ahead of Yoruichi and Ichigo with a very confused Renji on the bus. The red haired man stared blatantly at the nobleman's face until he had to turn and stare back. "What are you staring at?" he inquired placidly, his gray eyes once again taking reign of the coldness they were once known for.
"You look weird." Renji blurted out dumbly before smacking a hand to his forehead, "I—I mean, uh, you're acting kind of weird and I want to know why, taicho." He nodded to himself, thankful that quick thinking was able to save him from getting shredded to bits.
"Weird? Such a basic and informal adjective." Byakuya said thickly, yet still maintained his superior tone. "Now why do you think so?"
"You look like you've seen a ghost," he replied but face palmed inwardly as he realized that they see plenty of ghosts as Shinigami, "You look shell-shocked."
Turning his head to look out of the window, he crossed his arms as if to form a barrier and responded to Renji's statement. "My emotions are nothing that you are obligated to concern yourself about, and I am at peace as of the moment." He finished with a level tone, effectively severing the strings of the conversation with a hot knife. Renji leaned back, seemingly satisfied with his taicho's answer, but nonetheless kept an eye on him.
Shinji Hirako was grinning up a storm from the back of the bus. He knew why Byakuya looked like a scared little girl and wanted nothing more but to call him out on it, but it would only cause him to get spied on more than Kuchiki or Unohana.
Kenpachi looked over at the grinning man and scowled. "The hell you grinning at Kuchiki like that for? You wanna sleep with him or somethin'?" he barked out viciously, immediately pissed off at the blond man for no apparent reason.
Hirako didn't even bother to grace Kenpachi by acknowledging him and decided to respond back as he looked out of the window. "I don't roll that way, pinhead. And at least I can get a woman or two to sleep with me—the only females I see you with are your pink haired monkey and your fruitcake 5th seat!" he responded casually, and a majority of the bus responded with sniggers and giggles.
Yumichika immediately clapped two hands over the ears of a sleeping Yachiru in his lap (thanks Nemu) and flipped his hair angrily. "I am by no means a female, Hirako-taicho! And you should think twice about saying such inappropriate, ugly things!" he retorted viciously and even made a point about snapping as he finished.
"Stop acting like a pussy, Yumi. Real men handle shit like this by killing each other!" Kenpachi roared as he gripped the handle of his zanpakuto and attempted to send out a wave of killing intent through his gigai, but only managed to create a buzz in the air.
"First off, the word 'pussy' is such a disgustingly ugly slang word. I prefer the use of the word 'vagina'." Yumichika explained fluently, seemingly forgetting that Shinji insulted him and Yachiru.
"So instead of calling someone a pussy, you call them a vagina." Shuhei turned in his seat in the front repeated in disbelief, knowing that only Yumichika is capable of such an unorthodox thing.
"Yes, of course. Is there a problem?" the infamous 'Supermodel of the Soul Society' challenged.
"N—No…it's nothing." Shuhei muttered and returned to his seat, glad that he was able to get out of that one.
"It's quite elegant, don't you think? It just rolls off of the tongue!" Yumichika gushed as he cleared his throat. "Vagiiiiinaaaa, vaaaaaginaaaaa, VA—gin—A! Va-va-gi-gi-na-na!" he announced repeatedly as he enunciated the word quite fluidly.
The only people managed to keep a completely straight face were Nemu, Byakuya, Isane, and Retsu. Unohana shut her novel closed and stood in the middle of the aisle. Smiling gently was able to immediately hush the entire bus and she spoke in a gentle voice. "Using such inappropriate language in front of a child is not the behavior that seated officers should partake in. Right, Hirako-taicho, Zaraki-taicho, and 5th seat Ayasegawa?" she finished sweetly, maintaining steady eye contact with the three.
Shinji eyed her for a bit before nodding halfheartedly and muttered an apology.
Kenpachi grunted and fell asleep.
Yumichika turned a bright shade of red and stammered lamely for a few moments before staring at his reflecting with a pocket mirror.
Nanao was standing at the front of the bus with her clipboard, taking attendance. The bus had little lighting, so she had to squint at the print. "Yes…everyone is present—no—we are missing Kurotsuchi-taicho, does anyone know where he is?" She looked directly at Nemu, who merely shrugged at her.
Uryu scowled and put the engine in drive and began to pull out of the parking lot. "Who cares?"
After a half an hour of various arguments, songs, and carsickness, Byakuya, with forced calm, glided smoothly off of the bus with his bags and made an immediate beeline to the entrance of the hotel. The décor was quite elegant, for a commoner, that is.
The sooner he could fall asleep and forget about this day, the better. Retsu hadn't made any inclination of acknowledging him, his patience was running thin. If someone as clueless and dimwitted as Renji could catch on to his uneasiness, it meant that he was doing something wrong.
He deposited himself in an itchy armchair and closed his eyes for a moment's peace while Yoruichi check everyone in. Not even a moment later did he hear a shrill cry from one of the ryoka.
"What the hell are you doing here? We left you at the mall!" Uryu shouted at Mayuri Kurotsuchi, who was seated near the elevators, tinkering around with a remote control device. Narrowing his amber eyes at the Quincy, he chuckled sardonically. "Foolish little Quincy boy, did you really think I wasn't anticipating that?"
The bespectacled man spluttered lamely and scowled, unable to form a response.
"There is a chip in your brain, and from it I can read your mind, stupid Quincy boy." He replied simply, thinking that Uryu knew about this new technology in his head.
Tuning out the argument, Byakuya rubbed his eyes in aggravation and stared at the ceiling in deep thought. Renji was leaning against a wall on the other side of the lobby with Ichigo as he watched his taicho. There was something wrong with him, and he was surely going to figure it out!
"He's hiding something. I just know it; can't you feel that there is something wrong?" Renji muttered over his shoulder so that Ichigo, who had a wary eye on Yoruichi, could hear.
"You're right, everything just feels weird. I have this weird theory, so hear me out…" Ichigo began.
A few minutes later, Renji was seated on the ground with a pale face. So that was it! It wasn't like he didn't expect something like this, but so soon after the war?! He lifted a wary eye to Ichigo, who was staring down at him with a smirk. "Idiot, I'm just a Substitute Shinigami and even I figured it out before you, a Pure Shinigami. Shame."
"Shut up," Renji retorted thickly as he accepted Ichigo's outstretched arm. "I'm not a noble, like you!" Ichigo had to force his father into explaining the truth about his past, and his father reluctantly told him that he was a former captain of the Gotei 13 and former clan head of the Shiba. Thus, making Ichigo and his sisters' apart of the Soul Society's nobility.
Shrugging lightly, Ichigo yanked his bag over his shoulder and walked over to the elevator, "Stop draggin' your ass, Yoruichi's already got the keys, let's get to our rooms so I can sleep!"
Retsu's eyes widened in delight as she strolled into the hotel suite. Yoruichi must have really gone out of her way this time. There was a huge living room that was outfitted with half dozen leather loveseats, a huge 50-in flat-screen television, a full kitchen, and five white doors that led to the bedrooms.
"How much money did this cost? This hotel is way over our budget!" Nanao questioned bluntly as she ran a single finger over the marble drinking bar. Yoruichi kicked off her sandals and dumped her bags on the ground. "Not much, maybe around eight percent. I'm sorta rich, y'know. Being a clan head of one of the Four Noble Houses." She replied airily, giving Nanao an arch look.
Nanao blushed and nodded weakly, "Ah—yes."
Isane was still at the door, staring into the penthouse room in shock before Retsu laid a hand on her shoulder, "Please enjoy yourself, Isane. You won't be able to do so if you stand at the door."
Nodding dumbly, she consented and stumbled her way in, nearly tripping over Yachiru's racing form. Forty five minutes later, each member of the SWA was seated in the living room with their pajamas on, looking for something to do to kill time.
"It's only eight o'clock, and I'm sure as hell not turning in this early, let's play a game!" Rangiku cheered as she ran into the kitchen to look for some snacks.
"Let's play duck, duck, goose!" Yachiru squealed as she ran across the tops of the loveseats. "Duck," she smacked Isane on the head, "Duck," then Nanao, "Duck," then Sui-feng, "Goose!" she screamed as she lightly tapped Retsu on the head before rushing out of the room.
"So, I have to act like a goose?" Retsu questioned blankly as she turned to Isane. Yoruichi slapped a hand to smother her impending laughter and was able to disguise it as a cough, "No, Unohana-san. You're supposed to chase and catch her."
Nodding in understanding, Retsu fretted on the inside. She will never understand the antics of the younger generation.
"Let's play confessions!" Yoruichi announced as she sat down on the ground, motioning for everyone to sit in a circle. "Here's how it'll go: I'll spin a bottle and if it lands on you, you must answer eleven questions, one for each person in the circle. Understood?"
Everyone nodded weakly and Rangiku joined the circle with a bowl full of chips, a six pack of soda, and an empty soda bottle. "Spin it already!"
Yoruichi complied and spun it. The women of the SWA stared at it in anticipation and it slowly came to a stop on Nemu, who barely blinked. Yoruichi explained the rules one more time and was asking the first question, then Nanao, Yachiru, Momo, Rukia, Kiyone, Orihime, Isane, Retsu, Sui-feng, and finally Rangiku.
"First question: Are you a virgin?" she asked with a sly grin. Nemu assumed that it would be the only thing that Yoruichi would be asking for the night. Seeing that the rest of the woman who were staring at her intently, she knew that it would be smart to just get it over with.
"No." She replied evenly, barely moving her mouth. Just because she was a manmade being didn't mean that she wasn't able to do whatever normal women could.
Yoruichi was about to asking another question in excitement, but Nanao put a hand to the cat woman's mouth. "One question only."
"What is your favorite novel from the real world?" Nanao queried curiously as she ignored Yoruichi's pout, wanting to get a feel of the woman's reading habits.
"Frankenstein."
The rest of the women blanched and chuckled in amusement. What else were they expecting if she had a mad scientist for a 'father' who 'created' her?
"Do you have candy?" Yachiru asked as she bounced up and down on her heels in anticipation.
"No."
The next forty five minutes were spent asking each other various questions; ranging from questions like 'Would you rather lick Mayuri Kurotsuchi's back or Yamamoto's toes?' to 'What you would you do if you were born with an extra foot?'
Finally, it was time for Retsu to answer the questions of the other women. Glancing around she noticed how they were sending each other warning glances and some of them were pretending to fiddle around with their phone, but were secretly turning on recording devices.
"Are you ready?" Yoruichi asked sympathetically, giving Retsu the opportunity to back out; mainly because she didn't want the rest of the SWA to go down with this possible train wreck. Her breath hitched as she saw the seasoned taicho nod; it was time.
Deciding to forgo using her virginity question, the corners of her lips twitched as she thought of something better.
"What have your past relationships been like?" This was the type of question that required a bit more explanation—more than Nemu's—and knowing Unohana, she'd answer each question quite through.
Isane kept her eyes staring straight forward, now afraid to even look her own superior in the eye. That whole situation in the coffee shop made her even more suspicious of the taicho than usual.
Retsu frowned slightly as she thought of her next words. It didn't seem like that bad of a question, so might as well go for it.
"They were nice, to say the least. I was treated well and loved; I felt satisfied and complete," she began, but paused when she saw Rangiku trying to stifle a giggle from the innuendo that Retsu inadvertently made. Ignoring the sound made when Yoruichi's hand connected with the back of Rangiku's head, she continued. "I was engaged for a short time, but that fell through." She finished with a tone that made clear that she wasn't planning on continuing with the last part.
Retsu answered the next few questions with relative ease, it seemed like the women were too afraid to ask for the answers that they really wanted to know about. It wasn't until the last question—from Rangiku—was her flawless feathers rustled.
The buxom strawberry blond was practically quivering with a mix of fear and excitement that she didn't even feel Yoruichi's jab in her side. She had thought long and hard about this question, and now she could finally test her limits.
"Out of all the high ranking male members of the Gotei 13, who would you see yourself together with?"
The collective intake of breath did not go unnoticed by Retsu, but she had to admit that she was impressed with Rangiku's question. It was the type of question that could be asked to anyone here, but had to be answered thoroughly. She expected as much. She looked over at Isane, who had finally decided to look back and smile nervously.
It was nearly time to go on that trip again; that was her first relapse in ages and she knew that it couldn't happen again.
Yamamoto was out, she'd never embark in a relationship with a superior and someone who was centuries older than her. Kurotsuchi, Hitsugaya, and Komamura were out as well, for obvious reasons. Rose and Love—nah . They were kind enough, but not her taste. Kensei was much too intense for her. She disliked Zaraki even more than Byakuya did. Shunsui had courted her for centuries and even attempted to pop the question, but all of his attempts were thoroughly rebuked by her. She knew about Ukitake's affections for her in the past, but she knew that he wasn't for her.
And then there was Byakuya—the man she liked and the man she couldn't even stand to look at. His cold, condescending personality, his obvious disrespect for commoners, his dry humor—she liked all of that. Underneath the surface was a kind and thoughtful man who was ambitious as he was hot-headed.
And much to Minazuki's chagrin, Retsu had yet to admit that she had fallen for Kuchiki-sama. The signs were blatantly obvious, most of her thoughts had something pertaining to Byakuya, her heart goes a mile a minute in his presence, and she nearly snapped Isane's shoulder out of jealousy. Not only that, but she gave her lieutenant the type of look that could frighten even Yamamoto into submission.
The women wanted her to say Byakuya; that was plain to see. She might as well have a bit of fun with it…
Putting on a bashful expression, she waved her hand dismissively. "It's embarrassing, but I can tell that you all are anxious to know…" she trailed off casually, drawing this out for more than it was worth. Their eyes were practically glued to her…wanting to absorb each and every word.
"I don't know how I exactly feel about him as of yet…"
'No, no, stop it Retsu! This is a mistake!'
"We had lost touch for a while, but soon came back into contact, I was elated."
'Dammit, Retsu!'
Pausing purposely to keep the younger women's attention, she was able to force her cheeks to redden slightly and turned her face away from the others. At this point Yoruichi had crawled over to her and was seated directly in front of her, her golden eyes wide with excitement.
"I have a bit of feelings for…"
The circle had tightened even more around her to the point where she was feeling claustrophobic.
"Shinji Hirako."
Drawing an annoyed hand through his moistened hair, Byakuya spat the water he had in his mouth into the sink and rubbed his eyes. Today had been a long, horrible, day and he just wanted to turn in for the night, even if it was only eight. Clad in 'pajamas' as Urahara called them as he forced it upon him, he padded wearily to his bed and climbed in. That woman; that damned woman had plagued his thoughts for months now; not a minute passed by that she wasn't in a part of his mind.
He was thinking about her more than he thought about Hisana, which was very frightening to him. Rukia was elated when he told her that he could never forget about her sister and that he still loved her. But did he? It had been over fifty years without her and now his love for her was waning. He could not let that happen.
Retsu Unohana was driving him insane. Her smile, her graceful walk, her melodious laugh, her murderous glares cast at troublemakers; he liked all of that. He wanted to get to know everything about her. And that was the problem.
She was pushing Hisana out of his memory.
Finally feeling the comforting arms of sleep wrapping around him, he had settled in for a while when he was disturbed by a series of loud knocks, followed by a kicked in door.
"It wasn't locked." He muttered coldly, not even bothering to sit up and look at the assailant. He already knew who it was.
"It's more fun this way," Shinji replied smartly as he sat on the corner of Byakuya's bed. "Now get the hell up, it's only a quarter to nine and here you are in bed, tucked in your jammies, like an eight year old. Shame."
Flicking on the lamp that was on the bedside table next to him, Byakuya sat up and glared at Hirako through narrow eyes. What other methods of torture could he possibly put him through now? Wasn't that enough? "What do you want now, Hirako? Haven't you done enough to disturb me already?"
Shinji frowned at the younger man's snippiness, but the look of annoyance was quickly replaced with a grin. He was succeeding at chipping away at the kid's stone cold exterior; it was only a matter of time.
"I need you to do me a favor," Shinji began as he tossed something circular to Byakuya. The nobleman caught the object easily with one hand; it was an empty bucket. "A vomit bucket? So you've managed to poison the minds of our subordinates. How typical of a commoner in a high position," he replied with a huff.
Resisting the urge to toss Byakuya off of the open balcony, Shinji forced a smile. "All I want you to do is get me a bucket of ice. Easy right? Just walk out of this door and make a left. Go all the way down until you see an orange door, then make a right. Ice machine, right there. Got it?"
Byakuya stood up and stared suspiciously at the blond man. Why must he, out of the others, be forced to get a simple bucket of ice?! It could be an amateur prank set by Hirako and Kurosaki; which was much more believable. He hated when those in a position of power fool around and with the war over, it was happening much too often.
"Everyone out there is either drunk, lazy, or both. You and I are the only sober ones here and you need to get your ass out of this bed and do something." Shinji responded as he walked behind Byakuya and with surprising strength, was able to push him out of the room.
The blond man was right, every man in this room besides the both of them were completely plastered. Even the ryoka boys were nodding in and out of consciousness. Upon further inspection, he noticed that Zaraki was the only male taicho in here besides the two of them; the others were gone.
"I already know where Rose, Love, and Kensei are, but the others went bye-bye not too long ago," Shinji opened the hotel room door and gestured for Byakuya to go. "The hell are you waiting for now? Get going!"
Standing in the middle of the doorway, Byakuya took a moment to evaluate Shinji. His body seemed relaxed; the man had the audacity to wander around shirtless like a heathen. He was completely sober and he wasn't injured at all.
"I still don't understand as to why I have to fetch you ice." He stated placidly, hoping to not engage in an argument with the 5th Division leader. Trying to prove a point to Shinji was as redundant as a fresh graduate of the Academy challenging Yamamoto for the Sotaicho position.
Grinning at the younger man, he spoke as he slowly closed the door in front of him. "Like I said before, it's a way for you to stop being all moody and emotionless. Even if it's something stupid as getting a damn bucket of ice, now get lost!" he slammed the door smartly in Byakuya's face. Snarling at the wooden door, he realized that he was barefooted and that he was wearing a pair of flannel pajama pants and a tank top. He prayed that he didn't run into any women on the way there, especially Yoruichi.
He'd be in for a world of pain.
The game of 'Confessions' ended dully with most of the women too shell-shocked to even answer the questions properly. Most of them branched off into their own small groups, conversing idly over a cup of tea and so on and so forth. Unohana was situated with a novel in a far corner, but she was barely reading the words.
She was thinking of her next move.
'That was a foolish mistake, Retsu! Not only did you scare the hell out of those poor girls, you just put yourself in a situation that's going to screw you over in the long run!' Minazuki bellowed in aggravation. Why was her mistress so dense? Hirako was the worst choice for a fake crush; even someone like Kurotsuchi would be more convincing!
"I know what I'm doing, Minazuki. So stop meddling into my business." She replied stiffly as she brought the novel closer to her face, hiding her expression from the other women. Even though they were minding their own business, she could easily feel a few pairs of eyes on her at once.
"Under normal circumstances, I would have chosen Ukitake-san. But I still assume that he still has a thing for me and that would be insensitive to his feelings," she explained. "I chose Hirako as a way of getting the attention off of Byakuya-kun himself."
'I'm not following…'
"Hirako-san is already suspicious of me. But he cannot out me because he doesn't have sufficient evidence. He and the SWA wouldn't be able to out Byakuya-kun because of his noble status, so he's safe for the time being."
'So you're basically fighting back, but using a bit of strategy in between,' Minazuki stated with a bit more clarity in her voice.
"Essentially, yes. I'm still a bit worried about Yoruichi-san, though. Not only is she a clan head of a major clan, but Sui-feng is giving up command of the Onmitsukido to her. The Onmitsukido has always been under command by the head of the Shihoin. That alone puts her above the rest of the taichos and only slightly below Yamamoto-sotaicho."
'You could always assassinate her. We used to take care of problems like that back in the old days.' Minazuki advised in excitement at the thought of killing again.
"How long has it been?" Retsu asked, suddenly changing the subject out of nowhere.
Minazuki's personality suddenly darkened. 'Two hundred and forty-nine years, eleven months, and five days. Perfect timing, don't you think?'
"Almost too perfect, but it shall do, for now." Only five people alive today knew why Retsu always went on an extended trip to the 'mountains' every two-hundred and fifty years. Yamamoto, Sasakibe-fukutaicho, Ukitake, and Kyoraku, and herself, obviously, were the only ones old enough to have been there to see why.
"U-no-ha-na-taicho~!"
Retsu looked up to see an obviously hammered Rangiku crawl up to her on her knees, holding a bucket in one hand. Immediately thinking she was about to vomit due to excess alcohol, she was about to stand up to get a bit of medicine, but Rangiku grasped her by the wrist.
"I'm not—hic—drunk, taicho! Yo quería—hic, hic—preguntarle—hic—a buscarme un poco de hielo, pleaaase!" Rangiku slurred out in two different languages. Knowing a few languages herself already and being able to translate drunk, she knew that Rangiku was asking her to get her a bucket of ice for her.
Before asking why she needed it, she looked at the coffee table to see two bottles of white wine that looked fairly warm. All right, it wasn't a problem. Plus, she needed to stretch her legs a little as well. Helping Rangiku up to her feet and tucking the ice bucket under one arm, she went on her way.
As soon as the door clicked behind her, Rangiku instantly sobered up. "Alright, I want to know why the hell Unohana-taicho wants Hirako-taicho! He's just—ew!"
"And he looks like a horse too, I'm gonna call him Horsey-chan!"
Ignoring Yachiru's epiphany, Yoruichi sat up from her cat nap on the couch. She knew Unohana was looking for a way to get rid of her, it was obvious. She was a threat to her and her reputation; it was only instinct that she'd protect it.
"I didn't know you spoke Spanish, Ran-chan." Yoruichi commented off-topic with a smile. This was where she had to draw a line now. She didn't want to risk getting the SWA drawn in way over their heads. It was a necessity to keep them out of nobility drama as much as possible.
"Hirako-taicho is rude, vain, perverted, and egotistical; the exact opposite of Unohana-taicho. And supposedly, opposites are supposed to attract," Nanao commented sagely as she walked over to join the conversation. Her taicho swore on his life that the whole 'Opposites Attract' thing was real, and she was quite skeptical of it, until now.
Rukia was still pale from Unohana's confession, but had a voice to speak. "She could be lying, you know; it's probably just a silly prank! You know how out of sorts she can be when we do our kind of stuff."
The women nodded thoughtfully and gave Rukia an appreciative look. She could be right, Unohana-taicho was almost always lost when it came to girl talk, games, and of course, gossip. This could just be her little way of toying around with them, especially with the war being over.
"For now, just play along with it; at least until it's painfully obvious that she's joking around," Yoruichi advised, "No one, and I repeat, no one mention a word of this to anyone outside of this room. Especially Shinji."
"How come? Hirako-taicho would think that this is kind of fun and would want to join in, right Yoruichi-san?" Momo asked with a red face. She thought she got to know everything about her new taicho, but even being the closest to him out of everyone in this room, she was just as lost as the rest were. She wasn't sure if she'd be around long enough to see a marriage between Kuchiki-taicho and Unohana-taicho; there was an opening in the Kidoshu she wanted to go for it.
"I've known Shinji since I was a teen in the Academy and he was a lieutenant. Back then, he was your typical asshole of a man. But he's a lot less jovial now and even more twisted in the head," Yoruichi explained seriously, freezing the blood in the veins of everyone else present. "Aizen messed him up badly, and I don't want you all to get roped into his antics. He won't cross me, but he'll have no qualms about manipulating the rest of you."
"Jeez, you're making him sound like a serial killer! We're all high ranking for a reason, we're not stupid." Rangiku retorted and the rest of the women voiced their agreement.
Knowing that she'd lost this argument, Yoruichi relented, but made them promise not to meddle unless she deemed it necessary.
Byakuya cursed as he smacked the machine with his free hand. He had been standing at the ice machine for at least five minutes and had filled up only a fourth of the bucket when the machine sputtered out and was now only giving him one ice cube every few seconds.
He heard a few soft footsteps behind him and dismissed it as someone returning to their room. Noticing that the footsteps were getting a bit more hurried and louder, he turned around to see Retsu, clad in a pair of Chappy the Bunny pajamas bottoms, a sleeveless shirt, and a pair of sandals. Rukia had insisted that she wear these since she had only packed sleeping kimonos.
"Byakuya-san." Retsu said calmly with open eyes; neither a word of surprise or greeting. Seeing him with ruffled hair and grungy pajamas made him all the more—relatable. Shoving such trivial thoughts to the deep recesses of her mind, she smiled and mentioned that the ice machine wasn't working.
"It broke down just a few moments ago, Retsu-san." He casually shifted his hair over to cover his tinted cheeks. Seeing Retsu without her ever present immaculateness was strange—yet it made her all the more appealing. His breath hitched in her throat when she moved into his close proximity and gave the machine a surprisingly rough smack with her hand.
The machine whirred to life and finally dispensed the amount of ice that he needed. Instead of thanking her and leaving like she expected, he stuck around and just looked at her. Filling her bucket wordlessly, she stared at him while he spoke.
"We need to have a word, and you're not running off like last time." Byakuya warned as he put a hand on her small shoulder. Even though there was little to no pressure on her shoulder, her knees buckled slightly; and yet she managed to catch herself before she pulled an Isane.
'You've slept in the same bed and kissed this man and you get all weak in the knees from a hand on your shoulder? You're as soft as cotton, Retsu.'
Throwing caution to the wind and discarding her cheerful and oblivious mask, she spoke quietly. "We've spoken already today, and I've had enough shockers for the day," she stated brusquely as she removed his hand from her shoulder.
Two taichos in a relationship spelled trouble. Two taichos; one being a clan head and the other a commoner spelled a shit-storm from the deep recesses of hell.
"That's obvious, you are quite the observant one." He muttered condescendingly as he rested the bucket of ice on top of the machine itself and crossed his arms about his chest. She directed a fearsome glare at him that would have caused an unseated member to have a myocardial infarction plus a series of grand mal seizures, but he only broke out in a cold sweat that he was able to pass off as the warm air of the hallway.
As he gathered himself, she filled her bucket full of ice and turned to stomp off, but her shoulder was once again gripped firmly from behind and she was cautiously pulled back against his chest. He let his hand drop, knowing that she wouldn't run again after that and his mouth was level with her ear. "I never thought I'd have to resort to physical methods, Retsu-san," he whispered, his hot breath sending pleasant shockwaves throughout her body.
"What else could I possibly tell you?" she asked thickly, trying to swallow the sizeable lump in her throat and not pass out at the same time. Her body was on fire and she was afraid that if Byakuya didn't let her go soon, she would do some things that she'd soon regret.
"What I want…is for everything to return to normal," he answered serenely, and feeling the rumble in his broad chest nearly made Retsu keel over a third time that night. He needed a bit more time to think things through; he especially didn't want Retsu to have to deal with his ongoing problem with getting over Hisana. He vowed to never replace her, but the ache of loneliness could take a toll on anybody.
"How do you intend to do such a thing when we are in a position like this?" she asked lightly and she felt her heart simmer down a bit with his weight off of her. She knew that she wasn't off of the hook yet and had to agree to whatever he wanted.
"The celebration is in two days. After that, things will be back to normal. We manage our divisions, attend meetings, and hold club activities as usual. Your cooperation is all that I ask."
Narrowing her eyes at him, she replied. "You are aware that we are being watched, right?"
"Naturally. Those harpies aren't particularly discreet with their movements. And Yoruichi is the ringleader of all of this nonsense." He snarled uncharacteristically at the thought of her. The woman had terrorized him since he could walk, disappeared for a century, then came back to resume her 'duties.' The epitome of a demon.
"Let's not put a stop of it, at least for now. When it starts to get ridiculous and starts to affect our divisions, then we shall intervene," she advised as she looked around the hallway in paranoia. "It's a way to teach them a lesson."
"So you are asking me to deal with this nonsense for a longer period of time?" Byakuya asked incredulously, eyeing the woman to see if she was joking. She was expressionless and placid, as usual, which meant that she was dead serious and expected his cooperation on this subject.
A silent nod confirmed his worst fears. He could ignore the SWA easily; he had done so for the better part of the century, but to play along with their scheme? It was social suicide and he had no way out of it.
"You don't have to decide now, I'm giving you an opportunity to mull on this a bit." She explained as she started to turn to leave. She jolted slightly as if she had just remembered something, and turned back around to him. "One more thing," she whispered as she gestured for him to come closer.
"Why were you cradling my lieutenant in your arms, Bya-ku-ya?"
His froze immediately in shock and he looked away from her icy cold eyes. He knew it would eventually come to this. The Kotetsu sisters had terrible timing and now he would be the one to pay for it. One misstep and he may just piss her off again, and he wanted nothing more for them to be on the same page once more. Composing himself rather smoothly, he replied.
"She slipped on her sister's bag of candy and fell. Had I not caught her, she would have injured herself." It was almost like she wanted him to let her own subordinate fall and badly injure herself! He gave her a cross look. Byakuya wasn't one to outwardly care about his subordinates, but a situation like that could not have been ignored.
"It was quite the provocative position and any woman would be suspicious of something like that." She defended herself with a shrug and a flippant wave of the hand. It wasn't like she was going to murder Isane in her sleep, she just wanted a real answer and she knew her lieutenant would sugar coat it to instigate more drama.
"You sound jealous." He stated with a smirk as he took a potentially fatal risk by mocking her.
She disregarded his taunt with a flippant wave of the hand. "I was merely curious, that is all. It's not every day that I see my lieutenant with an attractive man."
"So now you think I am attractive? I always assumed that you didn't associate physical features with the matters of the heart." He pressed on as the smirk on his face became more pronounced. This was what he loved about being around Retsu; he could be himself and not worry about getting attacked by fan-girls or having subordinates flee from his sight.
"I don't—I have never seen my lieutenant in such a state before. That is all." she finished with a huff and turned her face away from him so that he couldn't see the aggravation on her face. Even if she couldn't afford to lose her mask, she could at least drop it a little bit around him.
She'd eventually have to tell him the truth.
"I see." He picked up his bucketful of ice and nodded a goodbye before walking away. It wasn't safe for the two of them to be caught out here; cutting their visit short was the smartest solution.
"One more thing," her soft voice called out in alarm. Noticing the panic, he wheeled around quickly to see what the fuss was about, but was completely caught off guard by what she did next.
She was in front of him within seconds, yanked him down by the shirt with surprising force, and planted a passionate kiss on his lips. Suppressing the groan of surprise and pleasure in his throat, he unconsciously gave away all of his restraint and wrapped his free hand around her, kissing back.
Much too soon, she broke the kiss and chuckled at his flustered expression. A bit of payback once in a while wouldn't hurt anyone. She took a long look at her watch and tutted fretfully, "Oh, look at the time. I must be on my way, goodnight, Byakuya-san!" she bid him adieu, picked up her filled bucket, and swayed down the adjacent hall.
She could see the look of annoyance and the look of desire plastered on his face. He stood there for a few moments more before stalking back to his room.
'Did you see the look on his face? He looked like he wanted to take you right there and then!' Minazuki gushed as the squealed in delight. Oh, this was getting juicy now! Whenever Retsu wants something, she gets it. Unohana put on an aloof expression and shrugged daintily. She wasn't trying to seduce Byakuya—oh no. "I'm not used to expressing my feelings, and that was the best I could come up with."
'You could've hugged him, shook his hand, had a cup of tea with him, played chess with him, you know. NORMAL STUFF.'
Casting her zanpakuto a curt look, she sniffed in distaste and kept strolling to the room. If Minazuki assumed that anyone in this universe was normal, she was terribly wrong. Being normal isn't a blessing, it's a curse. Being odd has its own rewards. Her reward would probably be finding someone good enough to tolerate for the rest of her long days.
It didn't seem too bad.
"You're only saying that because you haven't found someone you care about," she replied nonchalantly after a few moments of silence. Almost feeling Minazuki's temper flare up, she continued bravely. "Maybe one day you will set aside your bitterness and jealously and take the time to really express yourself."
'I am not bitter or jealous! Witch!'
Oh God. This is probably the worst chapter that I've written for this story; everything feels off and just completely wrong. But this is the biggest chapter so far, so I guess that makes up for something, right?
I usually limit myself to about 4,000-4,500 words per chapter, but it seems that I may have to double that limit at some point…
Thanks for reading and review!