Hey everyone, thank you all very much for the feedback last chapter! I truly appreciated it and am glad to hear that you're enjoying the story. I wanted to post this next chapter for you guys tonight, because I'm going into surgery on Thursday to get my stupid wisdom teeth removed. So I'm probably going to feel like crap for a few days after that. I'll also be posting the last chapter of Half-Life tomorrow. In addition, I just wanted to mention that the secret for this chapter was something Dan Scott had said in S1. Other than that, please read and tell me what you think! Thanks!

Secret No. 10: If happiness came cheap, we'd all be smiling.

Today was beyond depressing. Haley had woken up this morning and automatically noticed how dark and muggy it was outside. It looked as if a big storm was heading in. She'd then pulled herself out of bed and gotten dressed. She had a class at eight o'clock. However, as Haley started to gather her things to leave, she realized that she really felt no desire to even leave the room. She was still exhausted from crying the night before. Luckily, Carrie had gone out with some friends and hadn't witnessed Haley's breakdown. She still wasn't even back yet, which Haley was thankful for. She was not in the mood to talk and act happy right now.

So, instead of going to class, Haley had changed into sweatpants and a tank top before going back to bed. She slept for a couple more hours. When she had finally woken up, she found that she felt slightly better. She then grabbed her guitar and softly started to play around with a few notes. There were so many thoughts and emotions swirling around inside of her. She had to channel them somewhere. Her cell phone rang a couple of times, but Haley ignored it. It was probably just Lucas or her sisters checking up on her—no doubt wanting to offer her some words of comfort and love on the anniversary of Jimmy's death.

Haley just wasn't up to hearing it at the moment. She wanted to be alone. She continued to strum on her guitar for another fifteen minutes before finally putting it away. Unfortunately, it wasn't giving her the release she needed today. Haley sighed before running a hand through her hair. She then walked over to one of the shelves on her side of the room and grabbed a large photo album. She walked back over to her bed and took a seat. She carefully flipped through the pages. She felt a smile form on her face as she stared at the old pictures of her and her sisters.

One of the photos was taken at the beach when they were young. The three of them were making mud pies in the wet sand. The picture next to that one featured them taking those mud pies and throwing them on their father's feet as he sat in his lounge chair. They always did that. And every time afterward, he would chase them back towards the water. Every now and then he'd actually catch and tickle them until everyone on the beach could hear their shrieks and giggles. There was also a photo of her mom and dad having a fun battle of their own in the water.

Haley had kept looking through the other pictures, allowing the old memories to wash over her. She watched as she and her sisters got older with each page. The pictures of them with their father were less and less, the photos of their parents together becoming almost nonexistent. It was clearly the time when everything she'd known about her parents and family had started to fall apart. Haley had felt her eyes water. She grabbed a tissue and pushed on anyway. She knew she was just torturing herself by staring at these old photographs, but she didn't care. These pictures were all that was left of her father. They were what kept him from completely fading from her mind.

When she came to the last picture she'd taken with her father—the day of her sixteenth birthday—Haley had finally felt a few tears break free. She pushed on, though. The rest of the pictures featured their new life in Tree Hill. Some were of holidays with her family, hanging out with her sisters and Luke, and school events. The majority of the photos, though, were of her and Nathan. They had some type of contact in all of them. Whether they were looking at one another or touching, anyone could see that they were together and in love.

Haley had started to full on cry when she saw how happy her former self was in these photos. She had been so lost and broken before she met Nathan. He had been the same way, too. Nathan hadn't had an easy life either. But when they were together, Haley knew that they'd both felt complete. They were happy. Now things were just so screwed up. Haley slammed the book shut and fell back onto her bed. She threw her soaked tissue away before grabbing another one from the box on her nightstand.

Haley didn't just feel like she was mourning the loss of her father today. She was mourning the loss of Nathan, too. He was still alive and well—which she was thankful for—but he wasn't with her. Not like he used to be. Haley felt lost and broken again. She loved Nathan so much, but it seemed like no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get him to see that.

She knew that coming to Duke and trying to fix things between them wasn't going to be easy. But she hadn't expected him to be so cruel towards her. Little by little, Haley could feel her hope and determination chipping away. She wanted Nathan back more than anything. She wasn't going to give up. But at the same time, she could only take so much. She'd been at Duke for almost a month now and things still hadn't improved at all between them.

Haley continued to cry as the sobs overtook her body. She wanted it all out. She wanted these pent-up emotions and constant ache in her heart to be gone. Haley needed to feel something else. Anything else. She was teetering on the edge of becoming numb. Maybe that would be better, though. Maybe feeling nothing at all would be more tolerable than the pain. Haley clutched her stomach as she took deep, gasping breaths. She was crying so hard it felt like she couldn't catch her breath.

"Hales." Haley jumped when she heard her name and felt someone touch her shoulder. She looked up in surprise to see Nathan sitting next to her on the bed. She hadn't even heard him come in. Haley tried to say something, but nothing would come out. Hot, salty tears proceeded to slide down her face. She couldn't stop crying if she wanted to. The floodgates were open, and there was no closing them.

A second later, she felt one of Nathan's hands on her cheek trying to wipe her tears away. That was all she needed before sitting up and launching herself into his arms. She held onto him as if her life depended on it. One of his hands buried itself in her hair as the other gently rubbed her back.

"Nathan, I'm so s-sorry," she choked out. "I-I'm so sorry."

"Ssh, it's okay," he soothed.

"I h-have so many regrets. I never wanted this for us."

"Hales, just try to calm down. Okay?" Nathan said softly in her ear. "Just breathe."

Haley nodded against his chest and tried again to take deep, easy breaths. She focused on the sound of his heart beating and the feeling of his hand on her back. It took a few minutes before she finally felt herself start to calm down.

"That's it," he encouraged. "You're going to be fine. Just breathe."

When Haley finally felt like she had a handle over herself, she pulled away slowly. "I'm sorry. I ruined your shirt," she mumbled when she saw the large wet stain on his chest.

"I'm not worried about the shirt," he commented, still looking at her. Haley met his gaze briefly before looking away embarrassed. She hadn't ever wanted him to see her break down like that.

Haley wiped at the rest of the moisture on her cheeks. "What are you doing here, Nathan?"

"I took one of your books by accident yesterday," he explained. "I wasn't sure if you needed it, so I came to bring it back."

Haley saw it lying at the end of the bed and nodded. "Thanks."

"I also…um…" he trailed off while shifting a little, a nervous habit. "I wanted to check on you."

Haley stared at him, confused. "Why?"

"I know what today is and how hard it usually is for you. I just wanted to make sure that you're alright," Nathan stated. "I didn't really mean to barge in. I tried knocking. But when I heard the crying, I sort of let myself in. You should probably lock the door, by the way."

"I usually do," she replied softly. "But I guess…I guess I've been a little preoccupied today."

"Anything I can help with?"

"Unless you can find a way to bring back my father and/or stop hating me, then I don't think so."

Nathan frowned. "Haley, I don't hate you."

"Could've fooled me," she muttered sarcastically as she moved away from him. They were still sitting close, but Haley couldn't handle being near him at the moment. The comfort he'd given her moments before was quickly beginning to turn into anger.

"Look, Haley, I know that I've been acting kind of difficult with you lately, but…"

"Difficult?" Haley questioned incredulously. "Nathan, you've been more than difficult. You've been like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. One minute you're kind of nice to me, and the next you're making jabs at me." She couldn't take it anymore. She had to confront him about it if they were going to get anywhere. His constant hot-and-cold behavior was driving her crazy.

"Look, I'm sorry. I don't mean to. This is all just really hard on me, okay? You being here is like a double-edged sword."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm not going to lie. A part of me wants to find the right words to hurt you, Haley. Just like you hurt me. Then the other part…it's just…it's just hard. Alright?"

Haley sighed. "No, Nathan, it's not alright. I've been trying so hard to be patient, because I do know that my coming here was a shock to you and a lot to deal with. But I cannot be your emotional punching bag anymore. I'm not unaffected by any of this. I'm hurting, too, Nathan, and everything you're putting me through just makes me feel that much worse!"

"Haley—"

"I wish that you'd be honest with me. If you don't love me anymore or you don't want me here, then just say it. That's all you have to do, because at least then I'll know where I stand with you."

Nathan ran an agitated hand through his hair. "Haley, that's not it."

"Then what is it?!" she pushed, frustrated.

"The problem is that I love you, okay?!" he exploded. "That's what sucks about this, Haley. I still do love you. I always will. I just…I just don't know if I can trust you. It's been so long and so much has happened. Can you understand that? I can't just let you back in!"

He then stood up and turned away from her. Haley stared at him stunned, a mixture of both happiness and sadness forming in the pit of her stomach.

"Then don't," she stated.

"What?" he asked while facing her again.

Haley came to stand in front of him. "You don't have to let me back in. At least not right now. Let's just start over."

"Start over?"

"Like you said, it's been a long time and a lot has happened. We're not going to be able to pick up right where we left off. Maybe if we take things slow and start small, it'll be better," Haley suggested. When he still looked at her confused, she elaborated, "We were friends first, Nathan. Why not start from there again?"

Nathan was silent for a moment, mulling it over. "Friends?"

Haley nodded, hoping with all her heart that this new route would work for him.

"Okay," he finally agreed after another minute or so.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah. We can be friends," he stated.

"Good."

Thank God, she thought. In fact, Haley was looking forward to it. It was some type of progress.

"So, what are you doing for the rest of the day?" he asked.

"Um, I'm—" she began to say when her stomach growled loudly. Instantly, she felt the blush form on her cheeks from embarrassment.

"Hungry?"

"Yeah," she answered sheepishly.

"Have you eaten at all today?" he questioned, concerned. Somehow, she got the feeling that he already knew the answer to that.

Haley shook her head. "No. I haven't left the room."

"Well, I was just about to grab some lunch. Why don't you join me?"

"Sure," Haley replied with a small smile. "I'd like that. Just give me a minute." She walked over to the dresser and freshened up. Her eyes were still slightly red and puffy, but they didn't look as bad as before. She then grabbed her purse and turned back to Nathan. "Okay, I'm ready."

He walked over to the door and held it open for her. "Alright, let's go."

"Brooke, don't you think you have enough stuff?" Lucas complained.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Brooke retorted. They were at the mall shopping. Jake and Peyton had invited them to come along. Brooke had immediately accepted. She needed to stay busy today. She'd already cried a little bit this morning.

It's what always happened when she thought about her father's death and saw the images of him in the hospital. Sometimes she could swear she still heard the flat line of his heart monitor. But today was undoubtedly the worst. It's when the memories would return at full force. Brooke didn't care how much time had passed; she would never, ever forget that horrible experience.

"Just one more store. Then we can catch up with Jake, Peyton, and Jenny," she said.

Lucas nodded. "Okay." She knew that he was probably bored out of his mind and tired from carrying her many purchases. But being the amazing boyfriend that he was, he knew not to leave her alone today. She needed him.

"This way," Brooke instructed as they walked into another clothing store.

"The maternity section?" Lucas asked, confused. "Brooke, is there something you're not telling me?"

She rolled her eyes playfully. "I'm not here for me, Broody. I'm here for my mom."

"That's a relief," he muttered.

Brooke whipped around to glare at him. "What was that?"

"Um…nothing," he tried to cover.

Brooke folded her arms. "Lucas Eugene Scott, are saying that you don't want to have babies with me?"

"Yes. I mean, no. I just meant…you know…not right now," he stammered out. "Someday."

"You better," she warned before a teasing smile slowly broke out on her face.

"That was cruel," he commented, looking wounded.

"Well, you deserved it," she declared. Brooke then proceeded to search through the racks of clothes.

"Isn't it a little early to be buying your mom anything? She's not even showing yet."

"I'm not going to buy anything. I just wanted to see how these outfits looked," Brooke explained.

These will certainly not do, she thought when she picked up a hideous red and white checkered sweater. What blind fool designed these monstrosities?!

"That's it," Brooke declared after a few moments. "It's official. I'm just going to have to make my mom's maternity clothes. No wonder pregnant women always feel fat and ugly. It's these terrible outfits."

"I guess," Lucas muttered, clearly out of his element.

"Besides, a maternity line would be nice. Don't you think? All of the celebrities are preggers these days."

"Whatever makes you happy, Cheery." He then added, "And when can we expect this line on the market?"

Brooke gave him a look. "Don't start."

"What? I didn't say anything."

"Don't think that I don't know what you're implying. You promised not to mention it."

"Brooke…"

"I'll do it when I'm ready," she stated firmly. "Now let's go find the others." They walked around for a little bit in silence while searching for Jenny, Peyton, and Jake. Eventually, Brooke whipped out her cell phone to call Peyton.

"They're at the food court," Brooke announced while closing her phone. As they walked in that direction, she felt Lucas' hand intertwine with hers and give it a squeeze. She smiled at him and accepted his silent apology. Afterward, she leaned up to kiss his lips tenderly.

"I see them," Lucas stated a few seconds later.

"Hey, are you guys hungry?" Peyton asked while gesturing to the large pizza in front of them.

Brooke nodded as she and Lucas sat down. "Yeah. Thanks."

"It's really good," Jenny announced with tomato sauce on her face.

"I can see that," Brooke laughed before grabbing a napkin and wiping it off.

"So, it looks like you two have done some damage," Jake said while eying all of the shopping bags.

"They're all Brooke's," Lucas spoke up.

"Why am I not surprised?" Peyton teased.

"Shut it, Goldilocks," Brooke retorted back before stealing her slice of pizza.

"Hey!"

"Mmm, yummy," Brooke said smugly after taking a bite.

"Don't worry. I'll get you back later," Peyton retorted with sly smile.

"Bring it on."

Jake and Lucas looked at each other before shaking their heads, smiling.

Even Jenny giggled at the display and asked, "Daddy, where do babies come from?"

Jake and Peyton's eyes went wide as Lucas and Brooke almost choked on their pizza.

"W-what?" Jake stammered.

"Where do babies come from?"

"Why? What have you heard?" he asked suspiciously. Peyton nudged him and gave him a look. "What?"

"I was just curious," Jenny stated. "I want to know how I can get a sister to fight with."

"Oh," Jake commented, relieved.

Peyton and Brooke glanced at one another and smiled. "It's magic," Brooke spoke up. "There's a tiny seed that is planted in the mom's tummy. The seed gets bigger and eventually it becomes a little baby."

"But how does the seed get in there?" Jenny asked, perplexed.

"Brooke," Jake muttered as Peyton glared at her. Lucas, meanwhile, was trying to hold back a laugh.

Brooke just rolled her eyes at them. They had so little faith. "That's the magical part. It just appears when it's time to have a baby," Brooke explained.

"Oh," Jenny said. "Do you have a seed?"

"I hope not."

"Brooke!" Peyton scolded.

"What? It's true," she replied innocently.

"Maybe we should—" Lucas began when Jenny cut in.

"I never heard of a seed. On the animal channel it shows—"

"Jenny, are you done eating?" Jake quickly interrupted. "I thought that maybe we could go to that really big toy store at the other end of the mall now."

"Ooh, yay! I want to go!" Jenny exclaimed, her previous inquiries forgotten.

That was close, Peyton mused.

"Then let's clean up and get all of our things together," Jake stated before leaning in to whisper to Peyton, "Remind me to block that damn channel when we get back to the apartment."

Peyton laughed softly. "No problem."

"Oh my God, that's horrible!" Haley exclaimed, laughing. "How could you do that?"

"The guy in the stands was being a bastard. He deserved it," Nathan defended. They'd just left the dining hall and were on their way back to Haley's dorm. He'd been telling her a story about an incident at one of his basketball games last year.

"So that justifies hitting the guy in the face?" Haley challenged.

"The ball slipped out of Tony's hands, I moved out of the way to save myself, and the obnoxious guy was in the line of fire and got hit. Accidents happen," he replied with a smirk.

Haley shook her head. "That is so mean."

"It was an accident," Nathan reiterated.

"And you're a liar," Haley teased. A couple of minutes later, they were standing just outside her dorm room door. She really didn't want this afternoon to end. Haley had actually been having a good time. Now that she and Nathan had agreed to start over, there wasn't as much tension or angst brewing between them.

Lunch together had still been somewhat awkward at first, but Haley didn't mind. She was spending time with Nathan without him being hostile. That already made it a successful afternoon. After a while, though, they both started to loosen up. And as an added bonus, she was able to forget about her father for a short time.

"So…" Nathan trailed off.

"Yeah," Haley commented at a loss for words. She hated when silences sprung up between them. She started to say something at the same time as Nathan. They both stopped and gave one another nervous smiles.

"Sorry," Nathan apologized. "What were you going to say?"

"Oh, that's okay. I…um…I just wanted to thank you for lunch and helping me earlier," she said while brushing an unruly hair behind her ear. The loose strand had been bothering her all afternoon. "I was really upset, and I needed the distraction. Anyway, I really appreciate it."

"Sure," Nathan said, nodding. He then added with a shrug, "That's what friends are for, right?"

"Right." She gave him a timid smile as the same annoying strand of hair fell on her face, once again. Haley started to reach up to fix it when Nathan beat her to it. Her breath caught in her throat suddenly as his touch radiated throughout her entire body. She met his gaze and held it. It wasn't until her dorm room door swung wide open, breaking the moment, that they looked away.

"Oh, Haley, there you are," Carrie said. "I was wondering when you'd be back. You have a message on the answering machine. I think it was one of your sisters."

"Uh, thanks," Haley said evenly as she tried to mask her disappointment.

"No problem," Carrie replied as her eyes landed on Nathan. They seemed to widen for a moment before sweeping over him. She kinked an eyebrow and smiled charmingly soon after. "Hi, Nathan."

"Oh, hey, Carrie," he greeted back.

Haley stared between the two curiously. They know each other?

"It's been awhile. I didn't know that you knew my roommate," she commented.

"Haley and I have a class together."

"Wow, it's a small world," she said with a sweet smile. "How are you doing?"

"Good. You?"

"Great."

"I haven't seen you at any of the big parties recently. You missed out on some interesting stuff," Carrie stated pointedly.

"Well, I've been busy," Nathan excused. Haley stared at him intently. He looked a little tense, all of a sudden.

"That's a shame. You're always welcomed to stop by here, though. We should catch up." Her tone was light, but Haley could sense there was more to it. For some reason, she was not getting a good feeling about this.

"Uh, yeah," Nathan said while shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Well, I have a class to get to. I'll see you around." Carrie then turned to Haley and gave her a meaningful look. "And we'll talk later. Bye, guys."

"Bye," Haley replied as the knots began to form in her stomach. What was that about?

"I have to get going, too. I've got practice soon," Nathan declared.

"Oh, alright."

"I'll see you in class tomorrow," he said and started to leave before Haley halted him.

"What was it you were going to say to me before?" she questioned.

Nathan paused for a moment and shook his head. "It's nothing important."

"Oh, okay," Haley replied. She watched him leave before finally entering her dorm room. She leaned against the door and tried to process what had just happened. Nathan and Carrie knew each other. Carrie wanted to talk to her.

We never really talk, Haley noted. They lived in the same room, but Carrie wasn't always around. Haley could count the number of legitimate conversations they'd had on one hand. Why now? Does it have to do with Nathan? She sincerely hoped not. But if it did, it could be about something trivial. She was probably making a bigger deal out of this whole thing than it was.

That's it, she concluded. I'm overreacting. Actually, I'm not even doing that. Nothing really happened for me to react to. Everything is fine. Just fine.

Now if only she could convince herself to truly believe it.

"Who are you calling?" Brooke questioned as she, Jenny, and Peyton walked to the toy store. Lucas and Jake had spotted a sports store minutes prior and couldn't resist. So the girls went on ahead.

"Haley. She hasn't been picking up," Peyton replied.

"Do you think that something is wrong? Maybe we should drive—"

"No, I don't think that it's anything like that. She probably just needs some space today."

"Ooh, look!" Jenny exclaimed, pointing at the store. "Come on." She let go of Peyton's hand and took off running.

"Jenny," Peyton called while catching up to her. "Be careful. You know your dad doesn't like it when you take off like that."

"Sorry. Ooh, dolls!" Jenny grabbed hold of Peyton's hand again and led her over to the aisle.

"I miss my youth," Brooke sighed while looking at all of the toys.

Peyton rolled her eyes playfully. "Don't get all reminiscent on me, B. James."

"I can't help it. This is how I came to love fashion. I had my Barbie dream house, her expensive car, and all of those amazing outfits. When I got done with styling her, she looked like a million bucks. And then there were all of the Ken dolls that worshiped her…"

"Actually, it's not Ken anymore," Peyton spoke up with a teasing grin.

"Do not get me started on that," Brooke huffed. "They did not get a divorce. I refuse to believe that."

"They're just dolls."

"Ugh, there isn't even a point in me justifying this to you. You're the one who used to rip their heads off." They'd gotten into many fights as children over that. Haley had cried for days when one of her favorite dolls had been beheaded.

Peyton shrugged. "To each his own."

"I sometimes wonder about you," Brooke stated with a shake of her head. "Jenny, sweetie, do you see anything you like? Jenny?" She walked over to the little girl and knelt in front of her. There were tears streaming down her face as she breathed heavily.

"Oh my God. Peyton!"

"What's the matter?" Peyton asked while rushing over. She took one look at Jenny and her stomach dropped. "Jenny, what's wrong?"

"I-I…can't…breathe," she wheezed. Her hands were on her chest as she gasped for air. The frightened look on her face was enough to chill Peyton's bones.

"Does she have asthma?" Brooke suggested. "An inhaler?"

Peyton shook her head before ordering, "No, go get Jake." Brooke got up quickly and rushed out of the store.

"You're going to be okay," Peyton tried to soothe. She didn't want Jenny to panic when she already was having trouble breathing. "Just stay calm."

"Is she alright?" a woman questioned, coming up to them. Peyton looked around and noticed that they'd drawn a bit of a crowd. "Do you want me to call an ambulance?"

"M-mommy," Jenny sobbed. She then took a deep, strangled breath before collapsing on the floor unconscious.