GOODNIGHT SWEETHEART
{Author's Note: This was an emotionally draining chapter to write...next chapter will be the last one set in the 1940's ;). Thank you again to everyone who has added to alerts/favourites & most of all read. Special thanks to Lily & KatieMoon for your kind reviews; knowing you all like Rosie, is a big compliment :). Enjoy my lovelies! Please read & review, as if you have anything you'd like to see featured, I'd love to know. x}
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the character(s) you don't recognise.
Thank you so much for reading x.
EDIT: Everything in Italics at the start, is Rosie's dreams.
~+~
{SSR HEADQUARTERS| LONDON, ENGLAND| JUST AFTER BEING RESCUED FROM HYDRA}
"Keep her under…"
"She can not take anymore anaesthesia! You will kill her…"
"No, she will be fine, Doctor Zola!"
"Doctor Weismann-"
"Proceed!"
My recollection of the pain that had followed tore through me.
It was excruciating and fear was starting to take control of my body.
I couldn't move or speak as flashes of memories took over my dreams.
"Her heart has stopped beating Doctor Weismann!"
"No…We must keep her alive at all costs! She shall be the future of my work!"
"Doctor-"
"Carry on with the procedure, Doctor Zola!"
My body thrashed about in my bed as another sharp twinge of pain hit me square in the chest.
Tears were streaming down my face as I still tried to open my mouth to beg them to stop.
Why were they doing this to me?!
"It worked…"
"Doctor Weismann…What does this mean?"
"It means that HYDRA will not end with Schmidt's inevitable death, Doctor Zola! We shall become stronger and more powerful."
"From some…hybrid?"
"Just think of what else we can do! This is only the start of my plans…"
"Is she even human anymore?"
"Who are we to decide? No…we have created a super-human! The next step in evolution!"
"What will you do with her?"
"Let her go, what else? She is of no use to us yet. But, there will come a time, and then we shall use a trigger word, Doctor Zola! And she shall be under our command to act as HYDRA's most dangerous weapon!"
"And, what is that trigger word?"
I then sat upright in bed, my hands fisted into the sheets as I was drenched in cold sweat.
My whole body was in pain as I couldn't determine what I had just dreamt about; was it real?
Breathing heavily, I forced myself to swing my legs out of the bed and stagger over to the communal bathroom down the hall.
As I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I studied every little aspect of my features to try and find something different.
Somewhere deep inside the dark recesses of my mind, I had these memories of being under the knife whilst I was captured by HYDRA.
They had been haunting me every time I had closed my eyes to sleep.
Images of scalpels cutting into my flesh and syringes being hastily stabbed into my veins to try and keep me sedated.
Fragmented conversations that don't make much sense echo through-out my head as I wade through my dreams, desperately trying to speak or move and defend myself.
I was too scared to admit what I had seen to Steve or James, as their reactions would break me.
Right now I needed to be strong and carry on with my job for everyone's sake.
"Marilyn?"
Flinching at the voice, I chided myself silently for not closing the door.
"I'll be out in a minute Peggy-"
She was watching me closely, "Are you ill? I can call-"
"Please…don't…" I sighed warily before turning around and forcing a smile on my face, "I'm just tired is all."
"And I'm sure your time with HYDRA has nothing to do with this?" Shaking her head, she then gestured to the small kitchen area where a kettle was brewing, "Fancy joining me? I have been meaning to talk to you…"
She phrased it as a question, but it was meant as an order.
Nodding, I followed her over to one of the tables as I sat down and tried to look a bit perkier.
"Peggy, I'm fine, honestly-"
"You know, it will only be a matter of time before Steve and your brother find out about your sleeping patterns Marilyn; talking about it may help."
Leaning over to pour hot water into both the cups, she then gave me a levelled look, "You know what they did to you, don't you?"
Looking away, I answered quietly, "I get…flashes of these memories that come to me; they are so vivid! The pain is just…" Trailing off, I shook my head and brought my hands up to cover my face.
Peggy quickly sat down opposite me and said soothingly, "The Colonel spoke of your…abilities earlier. He is very impressed, and wants you to know that they would be invaluable to you as an Agent."
"I can't use these…abilities!" My words were muffled as my hands moved down my face to rest by my lips.
"Can't you? You have these abilities now, Marilyn. I know that how you got them may be unethical, but we…" She sighed, "Both sides have done truly awful things to win this war, but we are lucky to have you with us! HYDRA has some of the most advanced technology and the best scientists on the planet. You are an asset to us."
I removed my hands from my face to look at her in understanding, "I am needed?"
"Yes, and I know how much you worry for all of the men; you can change the future of how the military perceive us!"
She was right, and a part of me wanted to be a pioneer for equality.
"I am guessing that you have a job for me?"
Peggy nodded, "Intelligence work. May sound routine, but it is not easy to send average Agents into places of prominent HYDRA presence. We believe that their head scientist Doctor Klara Weismann has vacated an important ex-HYDRA facility in Austria, we need you to go and collect as much intelligence as you can."
"She would of left important notes?"
"Our sources say that she had to leave in a rush; her partnership with Schmidt is no longer possible, so we have luck on our side."
I nodded in determination, "I will do it."
Smiling, Peggy nodded gratefully, "I don't want to see you hide yourself away out of fear. Talk to Steve? He would understand more than most."
"I will, I just don't like to burden him. He has a lot on his shoulders right now, and-"
"He cares for you, that is not a burden."
She looked at me firmly before indicating towards the clock, "You had best be getting some rest Agent Barnes; you will be heading off tomorrow morning."
I didn't know it at the time, but that had set forth events that shaped me into a stronger and more confident person.
Determination had made me want to gather as much Intel as I could for the SSR and for Steve and his Howling Commandos.
We didn't get many chances to be together, but when we did, I didn't want to cast a shadow on our time together by mentioning what happened in Austria.
He and James knew that I was now much stronger, faster and I was immune to elemental damage, but I didn't want them knowing why.
Because the why was connected to the body that had been cut apart and left to decay by Doctor Weismann.
Only, the body wasn't exactly human.
~+~
{SSR HEADQUARTERS| LONDON, ENGLAND| WAITING FOR STEVE & THE 'HOWLING COMMANDOS' TO RETURN}
I couldn't wait.
My dark hair was pinned up and my make up was looking flawless; courtesy of Peggy.
I had also put on a new white dress and was wearing court heels (which were killing the pads of my feet.)
It wasn't like I was trying to impress my boyfriend, but…we had a date.
Steve had promised that we'd go dancing, and I knew that after this particular mission, he would need a chance to wind down and relax.
"Relax; I am sure that Captain Rogers will be here soon…" Peggy had looked at me with a knowing smirk as I anxiously paced around the area.
"I am relaxed. I'm just…stretching my legs?" I then sighed in defeat and chuckled, "Is it that obvious?"
"Ye-"
She cut off as the sound of men filing into the facility caught our attention, making me stand on my tiptoes for a glimpse of Steve and my brother.
The first clue I had of something being drastically wrong was by how none of the Howling Commandos could look me in the eye.
Every single one of them looked devastated and wracked with guilt, as I furrowed my eyebrows in concern.
"What happened?"
I looked over at Gabe who shook his head.
"Rosie, I'm so sorry…"
My heart sank as I tore my way through the men.
I was getting angry at my heels slowing me down, but I fought against kicking them off to run awkwardly over to where Steve was walking towards me with his blue eyes full of sorrow.
"Steve?"
It was then that I realised, as I shook my head and tried to look around frantically, hoping-praying-that this was all just a bad dream.
"Rosie…" He reached out to soothe me as I pulled away to carry on running in the direction he had came.
"JAMES!"
A strangled sob tore through me as I fell to my knees in the mud.
Steve had come to rush over to me as he knelt down, struggling to voice what he wanted to tell me.
"Rosie..."
"He's my brother! He can't die…Please…" I kept sobbing as the emptiness and gut-wrenching feeling of loss tore me open.
Rain poured down, drenching my outfit and the hours of joyous effort I had put in just earlier.
None of that mattered anymore.
The other Howling Commandos were watching in sympathy and remorse, as Montgomery had reached over to hand Steve an umbrella.
"I'm so sorry for your loss…" He rubbed my shoulder comfortingly before nodding to the others and walking off to give me some space.
I lowered my head to the ground as my eyes were burning from the stress of crying and my head was beginning to ache.
"James…" I kept repeating his name brokenly, as mud was soaking through.
"Rosie, I have to get you out of the rain...please?"
I was still sobbing uncontrollably as I couldn't force out any acknowledgment to Steve or even find the strength to stand up.
Instead of waiting for me to answer, Steve took charge as he had carefully reached out to scoop me up into his arms and hold me comfortingly in his embrace.
Passing numerous officials and our superiors still did nothing to deter him from getting me into the warmth.
I needed him to give me strength.
He was silent as he carried me into the barracks, his jaw firmly set as though he couldn't let himself grieve.
My vision was blurry as tears still clung to my dark eyelashes.
Steve gently set me down on an old chair by my bed that I used to drape my uniform on, as he knelt down on the floor beside me to take off my shoes for me.
I was still in shock; couldn't move or speak as now tears just fell silently down my cheeks whilst I stared straight ahead.
"Rosie?" Steve had rested his hands on my knees as he looked up at me, "Please…talk to me?"
Tears continued to cascade down my now red cheeks as I asked quietly, "What happened?"
He looked torn up with guilt as he explained, "We thought that it was just Arnim Zola on that train with a few HYDRA guards. But…it didn't go to plan. Bucky…he had my shield to defend himself from being shot at but…"
Shaking his head, he finished with barely a whisper, "The shield was too much for him to hold, and he was sent backwards into a hole in the side of the train."
My eyes kept staring forwards but my body shook from my silent sobs that were building up within me.
"Rosie, I should of saved him! He was right there! I couldn't hold on and then...he was just gone…" Steve lowered his head down to rest in my lap as he couldn't finish his explanation of events.
After a few minutes of me trying to regain control of my emotions, I raised both of my hands and rested them on the back of his head as I stroked his hair gently, "It's not your fault…"
"I should of saved him! I'm the reason for your pain, Ro-"
"No! It's HYDRA who are the reason for our pain Steve!" I answered back in anger.
"They kill and torture like there are no consequences! I can't let them get away with this..."
Steve had turned his head to rest his cheek against my lap as he said softly, "I'm going after Schmidt...it will end with him."
Looking thoughtful, I then lifted his head up gently, "I want to go after HYDRA with you. They took away my brother! They've ripped out a part of both of us! I want to avenge him…"
He had looked at me in concern before gently taking a hold of both of my hands and kissing them, "I can't have you hurt…"
"Steve…" I moved my right hand to his cheek as I stroked my thumb gently against his smooth skin, "They killed my brother! I need this…"
He looked at me closely, studying my eyes for what felt like forever before saying, "I love you."
I knew that was his way of telling me that he agreed to let me join him, as I smiled lightly and bowed my head to kiss his forehead softly and say, "I love you too."