Wow I just checked the last time I updated this thing, ouch. Bad fanfic writer, bad bad. Am crawling off to continue typing.
Disclaimer: This is only a pale copy of the masterpiece which is the real Naruto storyline.
Hollowness, and longings which will win?
Sand Border
As expected they didn't stay long in their first desert hideout. Only a few days after the new troup had joined them, they re-split and headed off in different directions. Sasuke and The Girl however, joined Ringo and Kiriya in West Quarter One.
From the ease of the change Sasuke concluded they probably did it often, making them harder to track down. A large caravan was given to Sasuke's team, Kiriya getting a seperate space too small to call a room, but private none the less. The Girl had a blanket which hung infront of her bed giving the illusion of privacy. The boys shared bunk beds opposite to her single bed. If they minded the cramped quarters noone said anything, as they were all too exhausted by evening to think about anything except food and sleep.
His daily camp life was different from anything he'd expected. There was no guilt, no pointed stares, no history to be ashamed of. He was the chosen vessel of the lamentated Orochimaru-sama, and as odd as it sounded, Orochimaru was missed, everyone in the camp had some story of how it was Orochimaru who saw past the failure they were and found their true potential. When Sasuke asked about those that never finished their training, they shrugged and replied, 'if some die on the way, well they should've been stronger'. Sasuke remembered thinking things like that.
But Sasuke's purpose never wavered, he woke everyday with the hope that today would be the day that Kabuto showed himself. And everyday he was dissapointed, and not. Everyday Kiriya pushed them further and higher something that hadn't happened in a long time for Sasuke. Every night he collasped into bed feeling pain and exhilaration. And loneliness. As much as he tried to ignored the sentiments, everytime he mastered a new move it was Kakashi-sensei's approval he sought, Naruto's jealousy, Sakura's pride. Even if outwardly he was content with Kiriya's brief nod, Ringo's snarl, and The Girl's smile.
He buried such feelings as deeply as he could, pushing himself into complete fatigue to escape them. Days swirled into each other and Sasuke was no longer sure how much time he'd spent in his new surroundings. Like everything else it didn't matter, he only had one thing left, and this time he wouldn't come back afterwards, wouldn't lean on Naruto or Sakura.
One evening, trudging back to the caravan after working himself to collaspe over a new shuriken throwing pattern, Sasuke was pulled up short by the sound of hissing. It was dark, had been getting dark for a good hour and noone had come to herd him back to the caravan so he'd profited from the time to train as long as he wanted. Now he wondered if he hadn't missed something vital.
The Group had camped in a new ravine still within the Sand's border, but within sight of the border of the Country of Wind. The caravans had been mostly been hidden in the many natural rock caves which riddled the ravine sides. The people had spread a little into the warren of interconnecting tunnels and caves making it hard to count how many people there really were.
Sasuke eased himself into one of the side caves and made his way silently towards the hum he could feel like breath on his skin. It took him a moment to realise that the 'sound' he was hearing, wasn't audible, and that it didn't in fact come from outside of his own head. Sasuke raised one hand and pressed it against his curse seal. The vibration was strongest against his skin at that point.
Following the feeling like a trail Sasuke penetrated further and further into the coldness. His fingers brushed against the walls as he turned and walked, always following the increasingly strong call. Eventually a real sound joined the feeling and he made out the murmer of a large group. Edging along the wall towards the source he used the natural darkness to camoflage his arrival at the cavern opening. He needn't have bothered noone was looking anywhere but at the back of the cavern.
Torches lined the walls but their light was concentrated on the figure of a person drinking from a plain metal cup. Allowing his eyes the time needed to adjust to the low light Sasuke raised his eyebrows in surprise as he recognised the leader of WQone, Nanami, who sat on a reclining couch. The crowd was made up of the highest level shinobi from West Quarter and from their respectful kneeling positions they obviously held the normally quiet scribe in high consideration tonight. Beside her stood Hanri the Group's Head Medic Nin holding the cup that Nanami had just finished giving him. Hanri's assistant lit an incense burner and placed it in front of Nanami. She leaned forward and breathed deeply from the smoke.
Sasuke's seal cramped suddenly and Nanami dropped back onto the couch her eyes rolling up into their sockets. A long sigh came out of her mouth and Sasuke felt his vision blacking out, little white stars starting to dance in front of his eyes. The inside of his skull hurt and he felt as if an enormous fist was squeezing his brain into a tiny pebble. Nanami's eyes snapped open and she looked directly into Sasuke's mind.
It took no more, Sasuke screamed. Arching back from her gaze, Sasuke dropped into the abyss below him.
Elsewhere
It was deep here, and shallow, and big and small and Sasuke had been here before. He'd seen these lights once before, when he'd first been given the curse seal. He remembered the floating feeling, the way his feet hung heavy from his ankles, even though his head knew that here he didn't have feet or ankles or a neck to feel the pain of the seal growing.
Slowly things became sharper and he could make out the shape of scales in the light, so that the encircling golden light became the thick coils of a huge snake. A snake so enormous that the head soared over him lost in the glare of the shining scales.
But he still stared upwards fighting the tears that formed from the overwhelming brightness mixed with the cramp in his neck.
"Ma-manda?" Sasuke asked, finally turning his eyes away.
"Ssassuke." Manda replied.
Sasuke blinked staring at the 'ground' under his floating feet.
"It hurts." Sasuke said, rubbing at the roiling seal.
"Becausse you fight it." Manda said, his coils shifting suddenly.
"..."
"Why do you fight it?" Manda asked, his head lowering so that Sasuke could feel the stare of the snake on the seal.
Sasuke forced himself to lower his hand and clenched his fists as he felt the seal open against his will. The tendrils of the seal spread out, over his skin like over his mind.
"Why do you fight Ssnakesskin?" Manda asked, his coils slackening and his head descending further until the sensation of being watched forced Sasuke to look up.
"What could you possibly have to fight for? Do you love your life sso much? Do your friendss replace your family? Have you forgotton everything you are?"
With every sentence Manda's head lowered until it rested level with Sasuke and all Sasuke could think of was that Manda wouldn't even need to chew.
Manda's tongue flicked out and touched the cheek tattooed with black. Cold flicked through Sasuke making him shiver.
"It iss time you fulfilled your desstiny Ssnakesskin. Orochimaru iss gone, but I am not and the contract sstill sstands. Your body for the power you enjoyed." Manda hissed suddenly the power of his voice rumbling the air around Sasuke.
"As I understand it, you can't possess this body as Orochimaru could have." Sasuke said stalling for time.
He still had to kill Kabuto, couldn't let anything happen to himself until that. If he had a 'something' to fight for it was that. One last kill.
"True." Manda said, that rumble vibrating through Sasuke. "But then I have no need to exchange bodiess, I am not mortel."
"Then why...?" Sasuke began.
Manda hissed making Sasuke stumble and fall to sitting with the violence of the sound.
"I do not have time to disscuss thiss with you mortal. The contract sstandss and while you may fight me for a time, you will eventually losse and I will claim what I want. Better you make peace with that." Manda voice, though not made for roaring, conveyed the anger that he felt.
Manda's coils churned with force and Sasuke couldn't help but cringe as walls of pure muscle flexed around him.
"I will ssend ssomeone to you Ssnakesskin. I ssuggest you lissten to what they have to ssay."
Manda was gone before Sasuke could
blink and so was the light.
...
Time had passed, he knew that much. An eyeblink could take an hour or not even a millisecond of a millisecond of a millisecond, and he had done many eyeblinks. But more than that, he'd thought, though thinking here was dangerous. Here was a place of dreams and memories, and he didn't know if he was sharing 'here' with someone else or not. But the memories came anyway. Memories of when he'd come back to Konoha, of when he'd first realised that there really was no way to return to the past.
If he avoided Konoha hospital now it was linked to his time spent under Kabuto's experimentations, and the things the Hokage and Sakura had had to do to bring him back. To make him less than Orochimaru had made him, to make him normal again, human again.
They'd been naive to think that all that time spent under Orochimaru had left him unmarked. Oh they'd been ready for the pyscological difficulties, groups of therapists had been waiting to anaylse him, but noone had thought of the physical changes that had been made. Sasuke himself had suppressed the memories of the operations, the 'vitamens', the experiments designed to make him not only receptive to Orochimaru's influence, but the perfect container.
It'd been almost three weeks before the Hokage had called him in, or rather ordered the ridiculously small ANBU guard that protected him, to bring him in. Granted the woman was overworked, and had precious few highly ranked shinobi free to guard even someone as dangerous as Sasuke Uchiha, but thinking back it showed that she was too easily swayed by her student's desires. The reminder of his changes was rude and reminded him that he really wasn't the same Sasuke Uchiha, ex-team seven member.
Her voice was even when she told him of her worries about his physical state, there were no inflections as she questioned him about his memories of the operations, his increased abilities afterwards. Her surprise that he had no dependence on various drugs did creep through, and Sasuke sneered as he reminded her that as Orochimaru's container no such weaknesses were allowed.
His sneer had died at being told to strip, and she spared him no dignity or pudeur as she examined him externally and internally. Muttering under her breath she sat back down behind her desk as he shuffled back into his clothes.
She dimissed him brusquely and he left angry. Days passed while he waited for his chance to speak with Sakura or Naruto or even Kakashi, and finally the Hokage called him back. This time she sent the ANBU guard out of the room and called in a woman he later learnt was called Shizune, an older man in a med-nin outfit, and finally Sakura. His heart beat faster as she walked past him but she didn't even spare him a glance.
Stilling his face to hide his worry Sasuke fixed the wall behind the Hokage with a proud look.
The Hokage gazed at Sasuke, waiting a moment before she began talking to the three others in the room. "You are all the top medical specialists in Konoha, and more, you're all people I trust implicitly."
She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the desk still staring at Sasuke. "This subject is most delicate and I expect total silence from everyone working on this."
Sasuke expected her to continue to explain what the hell was going on, but it was Shizune who stepped forward flicking through a heavy sheaf of papers.
"When I first treated the subject after his return to Konoha, I noted various physical changes. None of them being immediately dangerous for his health I noted what I had found in a report and waited for an opportunity to further examine the subject. You all have a copy of my initial report and findings."
She paused and glanced at the others who all nodded. Glancing around Sasuke noted with growing unease that Sakura had started to look very unhappy. He also didn't like how noone said his name.
"In short, increased muscle resistance and blood flow, increased absorption of oxygen, replaced internal organs, augmented growth of nerves along the spine, and increased bone density are the things I noted."
Turning back towards the Hokage, Shizune snapped to attention.
"I recommended further tests to be performed on the subject at the earliest possible date to verify the extent of the changes and if they were a danger."
Sasuke wondered if Shizune'd deliberately left out saying who those changes could be dangerous to, him or their precious Konoha. Shizune nodded curtly to Sakura and the other medic nin before stepping back behind the Hokage. The Hokage still hadn't moved her eyes from Sasuke's face, while Sasuke still avoided looking her directly. Without changing the hard look on her face the Hokage continued.
"You all have the reports from my examination of the subject three days ago." The Hokage said shortly.
Sakura seemed to shrink a little in place, Sasuke saw this because he wasn't looking anywhere else but at her now. He had the sudden feeling that if he looked only at her then this...whatever it was, wouldn't go so badly. Sakura avoided his gaze, her eyes lowered towards the ground, Sasuke read fatigue in the slump in her shoulders and the shadows under her eyes. Her mouth was a tight line and he wondered where the laughing, carefree Sakura had gone while he'd been away.
"The subject's body has undergone major transformation surgery. Surgery which has pushed his physical limits beyond belief."
For the first time the Hokage showed something other a hard willingness to do her job, she sighed and leaned back in her chair playing with a carved stone stamp rather than looking at him anymore.
"But it's going to kill him."
Sasuke didn't twitch or blink, he watched Sakura's mouth tighten, the line of her lips thin even further. It was an expression as misplaced as the thoughtful, faraway look Naruto sometimes got.
He was aware that the Hokage was a little pissed that he didn't seem to be taking her revelation more seriously. But it didn't matter, dying wasn't a new future for him, in fact it was kind of comforting. He'd decided in an instant of weakness to return to Konoha, to team seven, he'd had weeks to regret his decision. To regret the ring he still carried in his pocket.
"Sasuke Uchiha is too valuable a trump card for Konoha to lose, especially at this moment. His' kidnapping' is common knowledge amoungst Konoha's lower level shinobi, the real story is only known by a selected group of people within Konoha. A limited number of Konoha outsiders know that Sasuke defected, even fewer know why. Most know only the official version we're now supplying, that he was a double agent working for Konoha to bring down the Sound from the inside."
The medic-nin snorted in disbelief. The Hokage fixed her eyes on him for a moment.
"Noone from Konoha will ever say it was anything different."The tone was final, and the man bowed shortly, once.
"I need you all to lend your specialisations to this case. I do not want Konoha to lose the Uchiha bloodline, you will do all you can to ensure his survival and fertility."
Sasuke felt a stab at the mention of fertility. It had also been brought up by Kabuto, the idea of breeding or trying to clone Sasuke to provide a continuous supply of sharigan carrying containers. Something about actually having babies in the Sound had turned the stomach of even the normally ruthlessly practical Orochimaru, and Kabuto had let the subject fall.
His throat was suddenly dry, so his voice was raspy when he asked,
"What do you mean, my fertility?"
The Hokage raised one eyebrow.
"We lost alot for you boy, good people, and your return to the fold is not without cost. You will not be expected to fulfill your part of the bargin immediately, but by the age of twenty we will expect you to have fathered at least one child, with another child every..."
Sasuke let out a short bark of laughter, the ridiculous image of him as a brood stud filled his head. Laughter bubbled up in him.
"You expect me to repopulate Konoha?" The idea was suddenly extremely funny and Sasuke doubled over laughing.
The Hokage gave him the time needed to recover, to wipe his streaming eyes and straighten up. It was only when he heard the stamp in her hand crack saw that the Hokage's face was nothing but thunder, that he finally swallowed the last chuckle. Sasuke still felt giddy from laughing and his reply lacked his normal caution and intelligence.
"I would love to try, but with all honesty..."Sasuke began.
The Hokage slammed her hand down onto her desk, which prompty sank into the reinforced floor a few centimetres. Shizune winced calculating the cost of reparing it again.
"Listen boy. It's not a choice, the only reason you're not body parts right now is you are the only still living Uchiha we have. And that for generations now the Uchiha's have formed the backbone of Konoha, and their bloodlimit has kept this village safe. You will breed, everynight if you must, but we will have those children."
Sasuke fought the bile rising in his throat. The thought of being a father was so far from everything that he suddenly felt light headed and nauseous.
"I...I need to..." Sasuke said weakly, hating himself for the tremble in his legs.
Sakura was there in an instant leading him to a window pushing it wide open and supporting him as he leaned out trying to hold together enough pride not to vomit. The idea of letting himself fall crossed his mind, from this height if he did nothing to stop himself it was a fairly sure death. The pressure of small hands on his back and shoulder pulled him back and worried eyes noted his paleness.
"Teacher..." Sakura pleaded.
The Hokage sighed.
"Sakura escort him to the hospital, we might as well start immediately."
"Well Kabuto, how is my Sasuke?"
Orochimaru's voice was like warm oil as Sasuke swam up from deep sleep. For a moment he lay blinking at the ceiling. He knew this ceiling, he was here often, this was Kabuto's special surgery room. This was where Kabuto performed the operations he'd perfected in the other, more securely locked rooms.
Forcing his body to obey, he dragged himself up to sitting ignoring the screaming pain along his spine.
"Ahh, Sasuke-kun, awake already." Orochimaru said with a satisfied smile.
Sasuke didn't want to move his jaw incase the bottom half of his head fell off, so he settled for a glare that said plenty.
Kabuto gave him a hard look but didn't try and force him back down onto the table.
"The operation was a success of course but I need Sasuke here for two or three days to monitor the results." Kabuto said a touch of testiness in his voice.
An amused twitch of Orochimaru's lips had a smile blooming on Kabuto's face like magic. In front of Orochimaru Kabuto didn't show his jealousy of Sasuke, or his fear. But all three of them knew about it.
"Keep me informed of Sasuke-kun's progress." Orochimaru said blandly smiling at both of them before he turned to leave.
The door had barely closed before Sasuke was lowering his feet towards the ground.
"Just where do you think you're going?" Kabuto asked trying to keep his tone civil.
"I have training to do." Sasuke managed to mutter without moving his jaw.
Kabuto placed himself between Sasuke and the door a friendly smile on his face.
"You've just had three days of spinal surgery to increase your reflex responses and you want to ruin it all by training?" Kabuto asked sweetly.
Sasuke gave him a twitch of the lips in responce and tried putting weight on one leg. When his body had stopped screaming he eased down onto the other, breath hissing through his clenched teeth.
Kabuto waited, annoyance causing his jaw muscle to twitch. When Sasuke finally let out a mewl of pain Kabuto used the distraction and punctured Sasuke's arm with a needle. After that there was only darkness.
"Sasuke-kun?"
Sauske blinked, a beam of sunlight cut through the semi-gloom of the hospital room. It lay across his legs and there was a line of heat where it touched. His head was groggy and he felt... unclean.
Looking to his left he saw Sakura sitting, waiting for him to wake up. Seeing him move to sit up she shushed him and stroked his forehead.
"It's just the side effects from the examinations." She explained gently.
Sasuke felt tired so he flopped down onto the bed letting his head loll to the side.
"I can ask Tsunade-sama to let Naruto in to see you. There are no more tests today." Sakura said withdrawing her hands to fold them in her lap.
Sasuke gave no response.
Sakura gave a pained smile and stood to go.
"I don't suppose there's any need for me to stay either." She said sadly, giving him a last glance.
Seeing him lying unmoving she turned a little further away.
"I'll ask Naruto to come tommorrow." She continued in a whisper.
Slow tears leaked from her eyes as he refused to acknowledge her words. Sakura scrubbed at her face trying to tamp down the feelings of helplessness that were swamping her. Turning back to Sasuke she lay her upperbody over his and hugged his neck, her face pressed into the crook of his neck. He ignored the tickle of new tears.
"It won't take long before all this is over Sasuke-kun." She whispered throatily. "I promise, and then it'll all be okay. Tsunade-sama won't let anything happen to you. Just hold on a while longer, you'll see... I promise it'll all be worth it."
He didn't remember falling asleep after that.
Sasuke traced the same old patterns in the ceiling, going over the same square pattern of tiling again and again. The air in the mask had changed scent and he knew that soon his eyelids would close and when he woke up he would be stronger, better. He didn't bother to think of how it was going to be done.
Sasuke was always amazed that Kabuto's room didn't permanently smell like blood and body fluids. But then Kabuto was always careful, about everything.
"We'll start with the chakra drain, and once he's at zero we can start the transplants." Kabuto's voice was pitched low but Sasuke's ears picked it up easily.
"I trust you with everything Kabuto." Orochimaru replied before he turned to regard Sasuke's prone body.
"Sleep well Sasuke-kun," Orochimaru said, a gleam of possession in his eyes. "When you wake up you'll be closer to your goal."
Sasuke stared at Orochimaru, words were wasted here. Turning back to stare at the ceiling Sasuke restarted the pattern tracing until his eyes finally closed.
There was a tickle in his chest and he heard voices. Sakura, the Hokage, a male voice. Slowly Sasuke opened his eyes and for a moment the glare of chakra blinded him.
A brief instant of surprise and then memory flashed back into life. They were operating on his chakra system. Again. Something about certain paths being close to burn out through overuse. The tickle in his chest became an itch and he felt the muscles of his stomach clench in an effort not to move.
"Sakura, he's awake. Deal with it." The Hokage said without lifting her eyes from his chest.
Sakura put aside the clipboard that she was busy scribbling on and hurried forward. She gave him a hurried, strained smile and placed he hands on either side of his head. He felt the warm pressure of her chakra caress his temples and he couldn't work up the energy to try and resist.
Pain lanced along his arms and Sasuke had to work hard not to let it show on his face. The Sharingan spun to a stop and he straightened from his crouch.
He felt the presence of Orochimaru leave from his surveillance post and couldn't stop a sigh of relief from escaping.
Kami how he hurt. Kami how far he'd come.
But would it be enough to catch Itachi? To pass him? Only one way to ever know, and only a few months left to achieve it in.
Naruto tried a smile but it died.
"So bastard, hear you get out in a few days."
Sasuke turned the food on the platter not sure what to say. He knew what Naruto really wanted to know, if they'd succeeded or not. If he was really back, or if he was going to try and leave again. The therapists had talked to him until finally even his ears stopped hearing their words and he just watched their lips move dully. And he still didn't know, if he was back.
Naruto scratched a whiskermark and Sasuke held down a shiver remembering the strength of the Kyuubi.
"Kakashi-sensei says we have to go easy on you for your first trainings." Naruto continued, eyes on the ground.
Sasuke stayed silent, but Naruto was used to silence and he continued anyway. Hooking his hands behind his head, Naruto tried to look carefree.
"Course Sakura-chan and I are real busy doing missions and stuff, so you'll have a chance to get a bit of form back before I hand you your ass again."
A quick grin flashed fangs and Sasuke wondered how long it was going to take this time before the fox marks dissapeared. The same thing had happened to him if he held his second stage too long. Even once he'd returned to 'human' state, certain physical changes stayed, a skin colour, the eyes, the longer shaggier hair. As if his DNA had been contaminated by the seal.
As if he wasn't quite human anymore. Maybe that was what put so much sadness and worry behind Sakura's eyes whenever she looked at him.
"But anyway, it'll be a while 'till you're back to normal.." Naruto stuttered to a stop his eyes wide.
Panicked Naruto started waving his arms as if he could sweep away his words.
"I mean, not that you're not normal now, it's just that, you know what with the surgeries and all you're not exactly like you were, no I mean, you're not...ready yet." Naruto finished lamely.
Sasuke abandoned the food tray and pushed the button which lowered the upper part of his bed into position for sleeping.
"Right. I'll just go. Get better soon okay?" Naruto said shuffling towards the door.
A few steps from the bed Naruto turned and gave a pained little smile.
"I'm glad you're back bastard."
Sasuke turned onto his side and stared at the wall beside his bed.
"Ssso sssad." Manda's voice hissed quietly.
Manda's head appeared and Sasuke's non-existant stomach lurched at the look of sympathy in those cold eyes.
"You were almosst a god and they made you human again."
Manda tsked and Sasuke stumbled back as Manda suddenly appeared beside him. Smaller this time Sasuke realised, no bigger than himself but that didn't reassure him much.
"I don't mind." Sasuke lied.
Manda tsked again.
"Liar." Manda said aimably. "Even you don't know what they left you."
Sasuke felt his vision dim and hoped that it signaled the end of this hell.
"But that'ss all going to change."
Later
Cool hands brushed his head, a quiet voice called to him. He felt sleepy and his mind felt heavy, flacid. With effort he opened his eyes blinking in the weak light, Sasuke almost smiled at Sakura who's eyes typically filled with tears. He opened his mouth to tell her to stop being stupid, tried to raise his hand to cup her cheek and soften the words when memory came back.
His eyes hardened and instantly his hand went to his neck, brushed over his face but the skin was smooth unmarked. He hauled himself up to sitting and looked around in surprise. Surprisingly The Girl had made no move to stop him. Even more surprisingly he wasn't chained, nor was he anywhere other than his own bed.
The Girl gathered up her bowl and cloth, for a moment she hesitated, then she bowed towards Sasuke and slipped out of the caravan.
No, Sasuke decided fuzzily, not towards him, towards the snake coiled over his feet.
The revulsion that stirred in him at the sight of the serpentine form that unfolded itself so that the flat triangular head could lift itself to stare into his wide eyes made Sasuke's stomach roil. Pushing down the rising bile, Sasuke gritted his teeth and refused to flinch as the snake glided up his legs until they were almost nose to nose.
The flat gold eyes searched deep into the flat black ones of Sasuke. Giving a hiss that made Sasuke's skin crawl the snake backed off.
"There isss no lasssting damage. That isss good." Recoiling itself over his feet the snake blinked lazily at him.
Wanting nothing more than to throw the animal off of him and bolt for the door, Sasuke bared his teeth fruitlessly.
The snake hissed again, a shiver of laughter rolling down its long back.
"My Lord..." The snake said mockingly. "You have nothing to fear from me. I am here to aid you."
Sasuke looked at it without speaking for a moment.
"I don't need your help." He said flatly, lifting a corner of the blanket to escape the bed.
"We do." The snake said simply.
Sasuke paused, then snorting he pushed his way free, giving the snake a few kicks. Flicking its tongue in irritation the snake glided quickly to the pillow and addressed Sasuke.
"Sssnakessson." It hissed.
Sasuke slowed, his hand stretched for the door.
"Sssnakessskin." It hissed again.
Sasuke turned against his will.
"Orochimaru is dead." Sasuke said flatly.
"But we are not." The snake said simply. "My Lord Manda ssstill wissshesss to fulfil hisss plansss, for that he needsss you."
"Manda is a summon, what does it matter to him if Orochimaru never reached immortality?" Sasuke asked fixing the pale stripe on the top of the swaying snake's head with his eyes.
"My Lord Manda, hasss hisss own plansss. Orochimaru failed him, he wissshesss to offer you the chance he offered Orchimaru." The snake said trying to fix Sasuke's eyes with his own.
Sasuke remembered this game. During the first year of his stay with Orochimaru, the various small summon snakes would amuze themselves by trying to hypnotise Sasuke his seal making his mind more open to control by certain people. Orochimaru used to encourage it, telling Sasuke to keep them out of his head with his own anger and hate. Sasuke had learnt to out stare most hypontism attacks, which left him protected against most genjutsu attacks.
"And what chance was that?" Sasuke asked
"Your dream." The snake said smugly.
Without changing expression Sasuke turned and stepped towards the door. The Sasuke who would've sold his soul for power, who had sold his soul for power, was dead and gone. Only the walking shell remained.
The snake gave a hiss of annoyance and slithered off the bed, slipping across the floor like lightning he interposed himself between Sasuke and the door.
"Your true dream, the one that not even you dare to admit." The snake hissed again, rising up to Sasuke's waist height trying to capture Sasuke's eyes.
"I don't have any dreams." Sasuke said bluntly.
"Only the dead do not have dreams." The snake insisted.
"Then I am dead." Sasuke said stepping past the swaying reptile and pushing open the door to the cabin.
Outside all the members of the West Quarter One were gathered in a rough semi circle, it was still night and behind them tall torches burned. Rather than the ragged, plain travellers clothes they usually wore each one wore the shinobi garb of a Sound Nin. The uniform which rendered all except the highest, faceless and monotone. The flickering shadows made it seem as if shadow ninjas were moving between the still bodies, it raised the hairs on Sasuke's neck. Nobody said anything as Sasuke stepped out of the caravan and onto the little lip of wood that jutted out between the door and the little ladder for descent. Warily Sasuke regarded them all, pride kept him still as the snake climbed his body until it could slip it's head over his shoulder.
Nanami stepped forward pulling down the mask she wore as part of her uniform so Sasuke could see her face. She took a place infront of him on the ground, turning her back on him she raised both hands towards the group.
"My brothers and sisters," she began.
Sasuke rested quiet, his body in that state of alert relaxation that allowed an instantaneous response to any situation. His eyes flicking from person to person, the sensation of being surrounded growing stronger and stronger.
"Your dream My Lord. Your real dream." The snake hissed into Sasuke's ear.
"It is as was promised!" Nanami continued.
"Your first dream, it'sss not too late." The snake whispered.
"The heir of Orochimaru-sama has returned to us!" Nanami called, thrusting her hands further into the air.
"I have no dream." Sasuke said, staring at each of the pairs of eyes fixed on him one by one.
"Remember, My Lord, think back." The snake prodded, and the words hummed through Sasuke's bones.
Nanami turned towards Sasuke and knelt.
"Leave me alone. You're lying" Sasuke whispered even as he felt the memories resurfacing.
"Yesss, that dream." the snake whispered again, positioning its mouth over the seal.
Sasuke felt the fangs slide into his flesh and the felt the seal awake under the venom being pumped in.
"I give you the SNAKESON!" Nanami cried triumphantly.
Sasuke barely heard the cheering over the hissing and whispering in his head.
Later
"Nomi, you're gonna get us in trouble."
Sasuke's skin tingled and he opened his eyes.
"Oh chuut you baby, I bet they were lying. There's no snake man in there."
A sound of shuffling outside the high, tiny window brought a shiver to his body and Sasuke blinked away the strangeness in his vision.
Small fingers scrabbled at the wood under the small round window which was the only source of light. Sasuke lay still searching for the feeling that had become so familiar that the lack was screaming at him. The worm was gone.
Cautiously he raised his hand to run it over the curse seal, the skin was smooth to the touch. Even the slightly raised 'scar tissue' which formed the mark was gone. He turned his head towards the vibrations that tickled along his back like fingers.
Little fingertips appeared at the window's edge. Sasuke sat up waiting for a reason to react.
"Push you baby." Nomi whispered angrily.
"I am pushing." The other grumbled.
Sasuke dragged a hand through his hair. It was long now, brushing his shoulders, but no matter what he tried, the spikey ends just wouldn't imitate his brother's silky mane. Nothing he did could bring him any closer to Itachi. Not even killing Itachi had bridged that gap. His brother had still looked at him with those far away eyes. Far, far, far away eyes.
It wasn't suppose to be like this, he hadn't meant to live beyond his brother, beyond his family. His family was dead, why wasn't he? Why was it him out of all of them that had survived? Stupid Naruto, stupid Sakura, even stupid Kakashi-sensei, and stupid Konoha, and stupid, stupid him.
Old questions running nowhere.
Sasuke rubbed his arms under the cotton clothes he wore, they grated on his skin. He seemed hyper sensitive. The murmers of people outside of the caravan felt like a soft breeze on his skin. He felt the sound of stomping footsteps like a drumming rain. His ears pricking up Sasuke climbed on the girl's bed in front of him and peered out of the window. The Girl had caught the two young kids in mid mischief.
Dropping from the window Nomi considered a fast get away trusting to the fact that she couldn't possibly know him to save him the beating he was going to get. But Natsu chose that moment to grab his hand.
From behind the window Sasuke wondered just how thorough her training had been. If she really had been groomed to imitate Sakura she'd whack the two kids into next week. He remembered well Sakura's abortive attempts to teach at the ninja academy. She may have grown up alot from the spoilt little girl she'd been, but the apple never falls far from the tree.
"Sssnakessson?"
Sasuke turned his head, The Girl's tirade drummed against him even through the wood of the cabin wall.
"Snake." Sasuke said simply.
"Are you hungry? Do the little onesss interessst you?" The snake asked, as if Sasuke's hunger and the children were connected.
"No." Sasuke said, realising that in the snake's mind maybe they were.
He turned back to the window.
But The Girl had finished yelling already and was dragging the two kids away, presumably to more punishment.
"I will sssummon your ssservant." The snake said sliding from his cubby hole under Sasuke's bed.
"No need." Sasuke started to say, but the snake was already gone.
Turning back to the window Sasuke watched the sand been blown around covering the footprints left by the two children.
How easily all trace is erased. Sasuke thought idly.
"My Lord." A grudging voice said.
Sasuke turned his head again. Ringo knelt at the entrance to the caravan. Sasuke considered him emptily.
Vaguely Sasuke knew that this half grown man had once incited jealousy and hate in him, that The Girl had once irritated and upset him. But all that was before, now there was nothing but the recognition of a face, a name.
Standing, Ringo looked up resentfully from under his fringe. Meeting Sasuke's clear gaze Ringo glared a moment longer then shrugged and turned to the pile of clothing on his left.
Ringo held out a sword belt and Sasuke tied it snugly before slipping the sword sheath between him and the dark material. Next Sasuke stood patiently as Ringo slipped a heavy kimono top over his shoulders.
With his back turned, Ringo hesitated. Steeling himself Ringo turned back towards Sasuke holding out the last item.
Sasuke's eyes didn't change but there was a flutter somewhere inside of him. It died and Sasuke held out his hand.
Ringo's eyes held something akin to respect or relief as Sasuke raised the forehead protector to his forehead and tied it behind his head.
The feeling of having something around his head was odd, but there was nothing more than that. No feelings of betrayal or change, as easily as that Sasuke declared his loyalty to the Sound and turned traitor, again.
Next: Just what are the consequences of Sakura's pact with Pakkun?