A/N - Prompt for this one came from madeleine68 so big thank yous for that. Quote is a favourite of mine. Mothers are a sore point right now so expect this fic to be flowing like Niagara Falls. And El and Liv have asked me to apologise for how tactile they are in this chapter - its all down to interpretation though so I'm blaming Serena for making it worse than it is!

*** L&OSVU *** L&OSVU *** L&OSVU *** L&OSVU **

Family

Friends are the family we choose for ourselves - Edna Buchanan

I'll never forget the day I realised I'd lost my daughter forever. It was a Sunday afternoon in Central Park. We'd not planned to meet, we rarely did really. I occasionally would feel some maternal guilt and take her out for dinner to assuage it, but generally she kept her distance. It wasn't that we'd argued particularly, there'd been no one incident that had left us estranged, we'd just drifted apart.

I was jogging. I've always exercised, it's a compulsion, an addiction for me, like the alcohol but more healthy. I like the sense of control it gives me, as opposed to the alcohol which does quite the opposite. Usually I work out at the gym, but it was a sunny day so I thought I'd make the most of it, and blow off the cobwebs of the previous evening's drinking spree. And it wasn't just me who'd decided to take advantage of the fine weather.

I caught sight of her before she saw me. She was stretched out on the grass, wearing a pretty maxi dress, bottle of beer in hand, leaning into the arms of an attractive looking man and laughing happily.

I can honestly say that I'd never seen my daughter look so relaxed and content. She was picture of happiness, and I couldn't help feeling a pang of regret that I'd never been able to make her look that way.

I moved closer, pondering the identity of the gentleman who was holding her. She'd not mentioned a boyfriend when we'd last met. In fact, at the time, she'd seemed wholly consumed by her work to such an extent that I couldn't imagine when she'd have had the opportunity to meet a man.

Ah. Suddenly it hit me. I looked at the scene again, noticing for the first time that they weren't actually alone, and in fact were a party of five, sat around a picnic blanket. They were five very different looking characters, but I suspected they all had one thing in common. They were detectives, and he wasn't Olivia's boyfriend, he was her partner.

Elliot Stabler.

I'd never met him, and I'd been told little about him, but mother's intuition had told me that he was someone very special to my daughter, even before that day. Just looking at her, laughing in his arms as he affectionately wiped something from the corner of her mouth told me everything I needed to know.

Well, almost everything. From the distance he was at I couldn't see his wedding ring, but I knew there was one. Typical Olivia. Always wanting things she couldn't have.

I was tempted just to jog on, but I'll admit my curiosity was piqued. I'd had so few opportunities to meet Olivia's friends over the years - my fault I knew - that I didn't want to pass up the chance, and so I jogged over to them.

"Olivia?"

"Mom?" Her eyes flew upwards to meet my own, a stunned - if not slightly guilty, understandable given her antics with Mr Wife and Children - expression on her face. She pulled herself from her partner's arms, looking more than a little uneasy.

I smiled, "Aren't you going to introduce me?"

"Well… yeah… ok." It didn't escape my notice that far from being the relaxed, happy girl that she'd been as I'd watched from afar, she'd tensed up considerably. She glanced round the circle awkwardly, "This is my mom."

One of the men from the group got to his feet, holding out his hand for me to shake,

"Nice to meet you Ms Benson. I'm Don Cragen, Olivia's on my squad." I shook his hand and there was an awkward silence as he looked to my daughter. It didn't take Einstein to work out what he was 'asking' her with that look. He was clearly the old fashioned gentleman type whose gut instinct would have been to ask me to join them but, it appeared, his fatherly concern for my daughter was coming first. I was surprised if I was honest. It never occurred to me that Olivia would have discussed her relationship with me with anyone, least of all her boss.

In response to his silent enquiry Olivia nodded at him, but I could see her reluctance in her eyes. And so, when Don invited me to join them I shook my head.

"Oh no, I won't intrude. Not at all."

I did genuinely mean it, but I presume, from the way Olivia rolled her eyes that she thought I was playing the martyr in some way.

"Mom." she said, in the plain talking way that was her all over, "Just sit down. You're here now. You may as well meet everyone." I sat down on the picnic blanket, uttering something about it only being for a second or two but she wasn't listening, already moving onto her introductions.

"The Captain you've met. This is Munch, conspiracy theorist extraordinaire," she said, pointing to the grey haired man at my side, before addressing him, "And Munch, she's my mom, so no proposals ok?" there was a humour to what she was saying but the joke didn't reach her eyes, such was my presence unsettling her. She moved on round the circle, "Fin Tutuola. Newest member of the squad. And El," she paused, and I caught her eye, amused by her use of a nickname for her partner - considering her boss was there, she wasn't acting terribly professionally, and she must have thought so too because she quickly corrected herself, "Elliot. My partner."

I smiled genially at the assembled group, "Well, it's nice to meet you."

"You too." It was Fin that spoke. "And it appears Olivia gets her looks from her mom eh?"

Olivia's eyes met mine again at that point. She knew as well as I did that she'd matured to look very little like me and considerably more like her rapist father. We'd had enough arguments on the subject over the years, something which she'd clearly discussed with her partner given the way his hand crept onto her shoulder in the seconds that followed.

Perhaps sensing he'd made a faux pas, Fin endeavoured to change the subject, although unfortunately for him crashing from one awkward topic to another, "Would you like a drink? Some chicken?" he indicated the tub of fried chicken that they were sharing, but it was his initial offer which proved the sticking point as Olivia glared at me, a definite air of "Don't you dare" in her frosty stare.

And yes, I know who I am, I know what I've subjected her to, but I won't be told what I can and can't do by the child I've raised and so, somewhat pettily I reached for one of the beers in the middle of the picnic blanket, "Thanks. Don't mind if I do."

"MOTHER!" If the glare was obvious, her furiously intoned exclamation was further more so, and she must have realised as much because when she spoke again her tone was softer, and less hell bent on making me look like an idiot, "Mom, you're jogging. You'll dehydrate."

I flipped the cap, and opened my mouth set to argue with her but I didn't get the chance before the one they called Munch cut in, "Its just one. I'm sure she'll live."

He may have sounded like he was on my side but I was watching the eye contact, taking in the body language, hearing the tone, and it wasn't hard to see that his actual intent with his words was to placate and reassure my daughter. Apparently she'd not kept the details of our rocky relationship on a high level when she'd confided in her colleagues; she'd spelt the whole thing out in glorious Technicolor.

Marvellous. Just what I wanted. To be sat round with a group of people who barely know me but know that I like to drink. I wondered exactly what she'd told them on that subject. Was it just that I liked a scotch or two, or had she got closer to the bone?

The answer I suspected was sitting in front of me. In the shape of Elliot Stabler and the way his hand, complete with wedding ring (I could see it now), was caressing my Olivia's arm, as his other arm snaked its way around her waist. It wasn't necessarily sexual, in fact, it probably wasn't at all on his part. He was just taking care of her.

They all were, in their own ways. Her Captain had obviously stepped into the shoes of the father she never had. Munch had the air of an uncle with a favourite niece. And as for her partner? Well, I just wasn't going there. It was pretty obvious what he was to her.

And it worked both ways. I could see the new boy looking at her apologetically, the pieces of the puzzle obviously having fallen into place for him, but Olivia was quick to reassure him, reaching out, taking his hand and squeezing it; supportive big sister to younger brother.

Suddenly uncomfortable, I necked my beer, even though I knew that in doing so I would just confirm everything Olivia had ever told her colleagues about me. I didn't much like it, but I wasn't about to leave a half empty bottle behind - I just didn't work that way - and I needed to get out of there before the feeling of melancholy inside me got any worse.

Bottle drained, I got to my feet and looked round the circle awkwardly, "Well, it was nice to meet you. I should go." Olivia didn't argue a second time, probably, I thought because she suspected that if I didn't leave I'd sit and work my way through every bottle of beer they had. Instead she just smiled thinly,

"Bye mom."

The others said their goodbyes to me too, and I took off across the park, not stopping until I was shielded from their vision by the large trunk of a tree. I stopped behind it, and looked back over at them. They'd picked right up where they'd left off. Olivia had relaxed all over again, was happy and smiling.

And why wouldn't she be?

She was with her 'family'. The family I'd never been able to give her, and now she'd found for herself.

I just hoped they'd look after her.