My only excuse to the lack of updates is that the holidays were crazy busy and I have been in a writing rut.
If you would like to see any particular character go anywhere, please let me know. =]
'Anna! Watch out!'
'Anna! Wait! Mom? Mama?'
'No! Mom! Mama! You can't leave me! Please! Please don't leave me! Mommy!'
Mariana had fallen into a restless sleep as soon as she felt her mothers step into the bathroom to talk. She knew she needed to sleep and she knew that fighting the inevitable would only hurt her in the end, but she couldn't keep her mind still enough to fully fall asleep.
It started with the same vision of Anna dying over and over, but it soon turned to her mothers in Anna's spot. It was something that she had been worried about since she had woken up from the crash, which is why she didn't want to let the two women out of her sight.
Her heart thumped hard in her chest as her mind played tricks on her and she witnessed her mothers being killed over and over again. She couldn't force her brain to turn off.
Stef and Lena had been in the bathroom talking for only about 10 minutes when they heard their daughter mumbling from their bed.
Lena had finished explaining the news about the twins' sister and both women were mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. They had no idea how they were going to tell their already broken daughter about this new news, and on top of that, they had other children to take care of.
Stef was the first one to notice the sounds coming from the young girl. She peaked her head out of the bathroom door and gauged the situation.
"I think she's having another nightmare." She said to Lena, who was rubbing the headache that had formed.
Lena sighed, "I'm gonna call Dr. Rosier and see what she thinks."
Stef nodded in agreement and watched as her wife left the room and then focused her gaze on her daughter who by then had begun moving around in a frantic state. She desperately wanted to just wrap the girl in her arms and soothe away all of her fears, worries, and heartache. It killed Stef to watch her daughter suffer without knowing how to fix it.
"Mommy watch out!"
The Latina's cries pulled the mother out of her thoughts and she made her way to the distraught girl. She sighed and made her way to the bed and sat down next to her daughter. She knew the girl needed to sleep, though she wasn't sure how effective this nightmare-sleep was, so she laid down parallel to her daughter and began to run her fingers through the long dark hair in the hopes of calming her down into a restful sleep.
Mariana sniffled in her sleep, and her mother's fingers running through her hair helped calm her slightly, but tears were still escaping.
Stef looked down at the broken girl and felt the unwanted lump in her throat and sting in her eyes. Biting her lip in an effort to stop the threatening tears from spilling, Stef tried to focus on her daughter.
"I'm so sorry, my love." She began speaking with a deep breath. "I wish I could take all of this pain away, but I don't know how to help you, baby." She pulled the girl into her arms and held her close. It had been years since she had held one of her children in this way, but it felt comfortable at the moment.
With another sniff, Stef began to rock the girl and continue talking. "I know you've been trying to hard with Anna and at home, and in school, with your dancing. I'm so proud of you. You have come so far from the first time I met you." She smiled at the thought. "You were so shy. You wouldn't talk to anyone but Jesus." Letting out a small chuckle, she continued "Do you remember that? My little Miss Thing not talking?"
After a moment of silence, she let out a wispy and teary-eyed laugh "I miss you, baby. I promise I will do everything in my power to help you through this. But you have to come back to me, my love." Still rocking the girl, she leaned in close to her daughter's ear "I love you with my whole heart, my sweet, sweet girl."
At the sense of another presence in the room, Stef looked up and saw her wife standing at the doorway, cell phone in her hand, and tears in her eyes.
Stef tried to force a small smile as she continued to rock her now calm and sleeping daughter in her arms.
Lena walked towards her wife. She needed to talk to her about the phone call, but she put that aside so she could comfort the blonde who was trying hard not to lose it. "She settled back down?" Lena asked gently as she put her hand on her wife's shoulder.
Stef sniffled back a sob and nodded her head, still looking at her daughter.
"Why don't we see if she will sleep for a while longer." Lena suggested, trying to get Stef away from the Latina so they could talk.
Stef nodded her head as the tears began to spill over. She kept her head down as to not show her emotions as she carefully laid her daughter back on the bed and planted several kisses to her temple. "I love you, baby." She added before getting up and walking to the bathroom, still not looking at her wife.
Lena sighed at her wife's stubbornness and followed her into the bathroom, closing the door halfway behind her.
Stef had found her way to the floor and sat in front of the bathtub, resting her back on the cool basin. Her knees were pulled up as close to her body as possible and her head was buried in her arms, which were gathered onto of her knees.
Lena sat down in front of her wife, but held off on speaking- allowing the blonde to gather her thoughts.
A soft sob and the shaking of Stef's shoulders indicated that she was letting out some of the pent-up feelings that had been bottled up inside of her. Lena moved next to her wife and wrapped her arms around her shaking figure. At this gesture, Stef's sobs grew and she buried her face into her wife's chest.
"It's alright, honey. They're going to be alright." Lena cooed as she held her wife in her arms and let her fall apart. She knew the blonde needed this breakdown. She needed to let out the emotions that had been building up for hours.
"I've got you."
"I will always have you."
"What do you know about the car?" Brandon suddenly asked his dad as they were sitting on the couch together.
After Lena went upstairs to be with Mariana and Stef, Mike had taken his son to the couches and simply sat with him there. Mike knew his son wasn't much of a talker when it came to difficult topics, so he was waiting for the boy to take the initiative.
They had the T.V. on to a show that neither of them were really watching and it had been about 10 minutes of silence before the boy spoke up.
"What?" Mike asked, turning his head to try and meet the gaze of his son.
"The car that hit the twins. Do you know anything about it?"
Mike looked at his son with a confused look. "Uhh not really. I go the call from your mom and never even saw the crash" he began with a questioning tone. "Why do you ask?"
Brandon shrugged and looked back at the television. "Just wondering." He responded simply.
Mike knew there was a real reason as to why his son was asking, but for the time, he decided to let it go. And although he knew the boy and his siblings were going through a difficult time, he decided to try and at least some of the kids out of the house to get their minds off of the situation.
"Hey, B."
"Yeah?"
"What do you say you, me and Jude get out of here for a little bit? Hu? Maybe go to the batting cages or grab some food that Lena totally wouldn't want you to eat?" He asked trying to lighten the mood and get his son to smile.
Brandon shrugged his shoulders again. "I don't care."
"Why don't you go shower and I'll talk to your moms." Mike decided, knowing his son wasn't going to give an answer either way.
"Ok" Brandon responded and got up to make his way to the stairs.
Mike sighed and followed his son by getting up and walking up the stairs to find his ex wife. He knew this was going to be a hard time for everyone in the family, but he hoped he could do something to take off some of the pressure he knew both Stef and Lena were feeling. Although he and Stef had gotten a divorce, they still cared about one another and Mike, though he was only the father of Brandon, felt protective of all of the Foster children. He made it his goal to do whatever he could to help.
Stef and Lena remained in each other's embrace for the better part of 10 minutes, pulling on each other's strength and trying to decide where to go from there.
"So" Stef finally spoke, wiping her eyes, "What were you going to tell me about the doctor?" She hated feeling weak and vulnerable, even when it was with the one person who she trusted and loved the most.
Lena wiped her own eyes and took a deep breath. "She wants an emergency session with Mariana. She said she has an opening at 1."
Stef nodded "Yeah. Ok. She needs to go. We can do that."
Lena nodded in agreement, knowing she needed to tread lightly with her wife.
"What about Jesus? And Callie? And the boys? We can't just leave them here and..." Stef began to ramble when a knock on the door pulled her out of her thoughts.
Both women wiped there eyes once again and Lena went to open the door, thinking it was probably one of her children. However, she was surprised to find Mike standing there, slightly rocking from foot to foot.
"Hey, Mike. Is everything ok?" She questioned.
The man ran his fingers through his hair and nodded. "Yeah, yeah. Uhh I was thinking of taking B and Jude to the batting cages or something to ya know get 'em out of the house for a bit. I mean if you think that's a good idea" He stumbled over his words.
Lena nodded and turned her head towards Stef, who by then had met the other adults at the doorway of their bedroom.
"That would be great. Thank you, Mike." Stef agreed. "Lena, why don't you go wake up Jude and let him know what's going on." Stef instructed. Lena nodded and began to leave the room. "Oh and ask Callie to come into our room. I want her with us today. We need to talk to her."
Lena again nodded and went to her daughter's room, where she knew her daughter and son were.
"Thanks again, Mike. This is really helping us out." Stef said with a small smile. She suddenly looked around the room and went to her dresser and grabbed some money. "Here. For food or whatever you guys want to do." She handed the money to her ex-husband.
"I got it, Stef. Don't worry." Mike said, holding his hand out to reject the money.
Stef licked her lips and nodded. She didn't have the energy to protest. "Thanks." She simply replied.
"B is showering, but I'll just wait downstairs for them." Mike stated before turning to walk away. "If you need anything else, Stef..." He began.
Stef just nodded and they both understood.
Lena poked her head into the room which held her children. She knew Callie probably hadn't ever fully gone to sleep, but she hoped Jude had gotten some rest. She waited a moment as she witnessed Callie ever so gently stroking her fingers up and down her brother's back and humming softly. Her eyes were closed, but Lena knew that she wasn't sleeping.
In order to refrain from startling the girl who seemed deep in thought, Lena gently knocked her knuckles on the doorframe and waited for her daughter's eyes to open. Lena smiled at the girl when she looked down to see that her brother was still asleep next to her.
"Hey, honey." Lena greeted as she walked into the room and sat down on Mariana's bed. "Mike and Brandon wanted to take Jude to the batting cages for a little while." She decided to just come out and say what she needed to. She didn't have the time or energy to build up to it, though she knew she needed to make sure Callie felt alright about the idea. She knew how protective she was at the time, especially under the circumstances.
Callie bit her lip as she looked from Lena back down to her brother.
"I can go with." She finally replied.
Lena exhaled before continuing. "Actually, mom and I wanted you to stay here with us. We wanted to talk to you."
The woman waited to see what the response would be from the girl who seemed so unpredictable over the past 12 hours.
Lena could see that she was having an internal battle with herself, so she continued to speak. "They're just going to the batting cages and then maybe to grab something to eat. They won't be gone for very long."
Callie knew deep down that she didn't have a choice in whether or not Jude went with, but she was feeling so nervous about letting him out of her sight. She had knots in her stomach that had formed the moment she heard there was a car accident.
Finally, knowing she couldn't prolong the waiting, the girl nodded.
"I'll leave you to wake him up and let him know the plan. I'll be in my room. Come on in when you're both up, ok?"
Again, Callie nodded and focused her attention on waking up her brother.
The mother smiled and left the two for a much needed moment alone- more-so for Callie than her brother.
It had taken a good 45 minutes for Mike to get the boys out of the house. Jude wanted to shower before he left, despite Stef's words about how he would probably get a little sweaty at the batting cages. Then, Callie wanted to talk to the boy before they left. Both moms knew she was telling him something along the lines of being extra careful and that she was a phone call away. Typically, they would intervene, trying to get the girl to continue to relinquish the parenting burden, but they knew this was a touchy subject for both of them, and allowed her to have her moment with him.
Finally, all three boys left with Mike promising to keep his phone on loud, along with the other two, in case they heard any news.
Stef shut the front door behind the boys before turning to face her wife and oldest daughter. She glanced at her watch and noted that they needed to leave to get Mariana to her appointment in a little over an hour, which gave the moms some time to talk to Callie.
Lena, being on the same page as her wife, looked at her watch as well and smiled at Callie, who seemed to be lost in a thought.
"So, why don't we get you something to eat and then we can head on upstairs to talk for a little bit." Lena stated as she put an arm around the girl and began to lead her towards the kitchen.
Callie, however, stood still. "I'm not really hungry. We can just talk now." She mumbled as she looked down at the floor.
Stef raised an eyebrow and met her wife's eyes.
"We have to leave here in about an hour to take Mariana to a doctor's appointment. So we can talk now and you can eat after, or you can eat now and we can talk after, but we will be doing both before we leave." Stef said with no room for argument.
Callie let out a frustrated groan. "I'll just eat later." She said before turning to head up the stairs.
Lena let the arm that had just been around Callie's shoulder drop and she exhaled deeply.
Stef came up behind her and wrapped her own arms around the taller women's waist and rested her chin on Lena's shoulder. "She's going to be alright. Baby steps with her." She whispered before turning her head and kissing her wife's mocha cheek several times. She unwrapped herself from the embrace but held out her hand. Lena took it with a small smile and the two of them followed their daughter.
It was going to be a long hour.