So I had a lot of time this weekend. Consider this my apology for not posting Chapter 10 sooner, although I made no promises about the length of time between updates. People are mixed on the whole "stressors" deal, so I'll just leave it as is. Maybe Petunia had a Dr. Phil obsession over the summer hols. We'll just all be grateful that I didn't say something along the lines of "number of LCUs in relation to the hardiness score."

Much love to all my darling reviewers who left me so many reviews last chapter! I got a lot. Is that the secret, not updating for a while? Shall I become one of those demanding writers that withholds updates until they get x number of reviews?... Nahhh. I prefer it when people review because they have something to say. So here goes my demand:

I will not update unless I get at least one hit on this chapter. Cool? I'm in a weird mood today.

Severus set the letter aside, outwardly calm. Inwardly, his mind was racing. Anastasia had gone to Lucius of all people. Anastasia hated Lucius Malfoy. She always had, all the way back to their Hogwarts years. But Lucius was precisely the last person that Severus wanted with this information, and Anastasia must have known that. Bringing proof of something like this to the Dark Lord could put Lucius on the fast-track back into the Inner Circle. They could not afford to let that happen.

He looked up at Harry, who was sitting in front of his desk like he always did Monday nights. The only thing that belied the fact that this was something out of the ordinary was the nervous way the teen was tugging on his fringe. "How did you procure this letter from Mr. Malfoy?"

Harry shifted almost guiltily and Severus' eyes narrowed. That did not bode well. "Err, he sort of… gave it to me."

"He gave it to you," Severus repeated blandly. "Please tell me that doesn't mean what I think it means."

Although Severus' tone had been mild, Harry winced as though he'd been yelled at. "He knows."

"And you just decided to confirm it for him by asking for his letter? You idiot boy, do you realize that in this very letter Draco politely handed over, Lucius asks him to suss out the truth? You just did all of his damned work for him!"

"He swore a Wizard's Oath, Severus," Harry said, sounding hurt. "I wouldn't have risked it otherwise. You know I wouldn't."

Severus passed his hand over his eyes tiredly. He hadn't meant to snap, but the situation was very dangerous. The most minor mistakes could cost them both a lot more than just their secret. "Was it retroactive? Because if Draco goes to Lucius with the news that you asked him to swear-"

"I didn't ask. He offered and swore while I was still pretending I had no clue what he was talking about."

Well that was certainly an interesting development. It seemed Draco wasn't too keen on being the little Lucius-clone that he'd always threatened to become. With any luck, this meant that Draco wasn't willing to go merrily skipping off to be branded with the Dark Mark. He'd have to have a long talk with his godson later. "What we have to worry about now is whether or not Lucius has already gone to the Dark Lord with this information. Either way, this is not a fortuitous development."

Harry nodded slowly. "He's on the board of governors. If Malfoy doesn't get him the proof he wants, he can start an investigation of his own."

"Precisely." Part of Severus was pleased Harry had seen that on his own without prompting. The other part scolded the first for not staying on task. "I'll talk to Mr. Malfoy myself later on, but from the details of your encounter, we can assume for now that he will not pass along any proof he might garner. That gives us some breathing room, as Lucius is not likely to go to the Dark Lord without evidence,- unless he is certain he will find that evidence- not after his… disgrace last summer."

He didn't mention the prophecy or the Ministry, but Harry still flinched. Black's death was still very close. "We need to find some way to give Lucius incontrovertible proof that Anastasia was wrong," Severus continued, pretending not to notice.

Harry chewed his lip. "How? I mean, she wasn't wrong. So how do we prove that she was?"

Severus sat for a long moment, looking at the letter contemplatively. He glanced back up at Harry, an idea forming in the back of his mind. It was a good idea, entirely logical and rational, and yet it put a bad taste in his mouth. Still, it was the only one they had, and it was very likely to actually work. "I have an idea," he told Harry, hiding his reluctance. "It necessitates Mr. Malfoy's help, but neither of you are going to much like it…"

"You want me to what?" Malfoy squawked in a thoroughly undignified manner. If Harry hadn't heard what he was responding to, he might have been shocked. But he had responded in much the same way. "Oh no, Severus, you've got to be kidding me."

"I assure you, Draco, that I would do no such thing."

Malfoy whirled on Harry. "Potter, you must have some kind of pull with him. Tell him that this is completely mad!"

"Trust me, I tried." Harry looked over at Severus, whose expression remained unreadable. "But he's right. It's the best chance we've got. I thought you wanted to help him, Malfoy. Family looks out for each other, right?"

Malfoy shook his head violently. "I'm not sure I like him that much."

"The depth of your regard astounds me, Draco," Severus commented dryly.

"I didn't mean it like that, I just… with Potter?"

"Draco," Severus said patiently, sounding for all the world like he was beginning a lecture. "The only way to keep your father from investigating this further is to prove to him that my relationship with Potter is just not a possibility. The best way to do that is to convince him that Potter has been in another relationship. As the only other person privy to this secret, you are our only choice for that."

Malfoy nodded. "Alright. I get that much. But why can't I just write my letter to Father and be done with it?"

"Because your father is desperate to regain his former status among the Death Eaters. He will not want to believe that this information is useless. He might believe- rightly, I might add- that I asked you to lie for me. And the moment one of your fellows finds you with your hands down the pants of some Ravenclaw, the ruse will be up- or did you think that wouldn't get back to Lucius?" Severus' upper lip curled. "Not only will your life be in danger once the Death Eaters know you lied to protect Potter, but my life will be as well."

Malfoy's face went white and Harry knew that whatever else the blond was- spoiled, arrogant git came to mind- he truly cared about Severus. "So Potter and I have to…" He looked over at Harry and shuddered. "I don't know if I can, Severus. He's a Gryffindor."

"You dated Seamus," Harry pointed out, feeling mildly affronted.

"And I told you, Potter, that was an experiment that I have no wish to repeat."

"Understand, Draco," Severus interrupted, "I will not force you to help us. This puts you in an uncomfortable situation, and I will not hold it against you if you refuse. But you also must understand that if I'd had another choice, I would never have asked this of you in the first place."

Malfoy licked his lips nervously and looked back to Harry once more. "Right. I guess… I guess this means we're dating, then."

"I guess so," Harry replied awkwardly. Out of the corner of his eye, Harry could see that, although Severus had gotten exactly what he wanted, he didn't look at all pleased.

Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil were whispering and giggling furiously as they made their way down from the North Tower. They'd been with Professor Trelawney, doing some extra work for Divination class. It was their favorite class, after all, and Professor Trelawney told them they both had the makings of true Seers. But they weren't anything like Hermione Granger, of course.

They discussed how Lavender's horoscope had told her that her true love was near and they made guesses as to who it could be. Lavender was hoping for Ron Weasley, who she'd had her eye on ever since the DA last year. Parvati, however was trying to convince her friend against Ron. He hadn't made such a good impression on Parvati or her sister Padma at the Yule Ball fourth year. Parvati had the feeling that Ron wasn't the romantic type.

A sudden noise made the both of them stop, however. It came again, sounding like a moan. Parvati and Lavender shared significant looks before creeping forward silently. If that had been a moan of pain, the attacker might still be around. If it had been a moan of pleasure, well, they didn't want to risk losing a juicy piece of gossip.

They heard a low, throaty chuckle coming from the same general area as the moan. "Liked that, did you?" a familiar voice purred.

Malfoy, Lavender mouthed. Parvati nodded, feeling as though Christmas had come early. Malfoy and his boyfriend du jour was a popular topic among the gossips. If they had managed to catch Malfoy at it with someone new, their friends would be absolutely green with envy.

"Draco," a second voice hissed, too low for the girls to identify. They crept closer. "Draco, don't. Not here. Someone will see-"

"Don't have to be careful anymore," Malfoy's voice was muffled. "I told my family. We could let the whole school see if we wanted to."

"Draco!"

The girls peered around the corner to see Malfoy pinning someone against the wall. His blond head was lowered, nuzzling the neck of… Lavender and Parvati stared; that was impossible!

"Relax, Harry," Malfoy said. "It's going to be fine." He leaned in for a kiss.

Lavender couldn't help it; she squeaked. Malfoy's head whipped around in her direction and Harry looked up, startled. His hair was mussed- more so than usual- and his lips were red and swollen. He looked like someone who had just emerged from a really good snogging session. But with Malfoy?

"Lavender, Parvati, I can explain," Harry said weakly.

Malfoy smirked. "I'm sure they can figure it out for themselves, Harry."

Oh, that was really weird, hearing Malfoy call Harry by his first name. "Y-you and Malfoy, Harry?" Parvati stammered. "But you hate him."

"Passion is passion, my dear," Malfoy said, with a sly look at Harry, who blushed. "Passionate hate can sometimes lead to… other kinds of passion." Harry's blush deepened, but he didn't contradict the blond. "Now if you don't mind, we were in the middle of something."

The two girls nodded, backpedaling quickly.

"Draco!" Harry hissed before they were out of earshot, sounding embarrassed. "You were the one who wanted to keep this secret."

"And you were the one who wanted to tell all your little Gryffindor friends." Malfoy sounded nonchalant. "Don't worry Harry." And there was the sound of more kissing.

Lavender and Parvati nearly ran to the Great Hall. Oh what a story they had to tell!

"Are they finally gone?" Malfoy whispered in Harry's ear, making him shiver.

Harry took out his map and checked. "Yeah, we're completely alone."

"Good," Malfoy said with a sigh, stepping away from Harry and leaning his back against the wall. "Well that was more fun than I thought it would be."

"I'm flattered."

"Not that." Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Although you're a surprisingly good kisser. I'll have to thank Severus for that."

"Malfoy-"

"Oh would you relax, Potter?" Malfoy raised a hand to rearrange his hair, which he had, in his own words, artfully disheveled. "I meant the act, the game. Scandalizing Brown and Patil. It was fun."

"You think this is a game?" Harry gaped. "Severus is in real trouble."

"Of course I know that, Potter. I know what's at stake. Just because it's dangerous doesn't mean it's not a game." He paused, thoughtfully. "Look, it's like Quidditch. If you have fun and look at it as just a game, you play your best. But if you play thinking about all the people depending on you and all the consequences of losing, you choke up. Like the Weasel," he added helpfully.

Harry scowled at the slight aimed at Ron, but he decided it was best to pick his battles. "I still don't see how this is a game."

"No, I suppose you wouldn't. You're too much of a Gryffindor." For once, that didn't sound like an insult. "Look at what we're doing Potter; we're trying to convince the school- and part of the world outside of it- that we're madly in love, when the opposite couldn't be more true. We're making them see what we want them to see, believing what we want them to believe. It's a bluffing game, just with stakes higher than galleons." He pushed away from the wall. "This should be all over the school before breakfast tomorrow, although no doubt your entire House already knows. Please do remember to sing my praises when you're besieged with questions." He walked off with a lazy wave.

Probably off to the dungeons, Harry thought, fighting off the urge to follow him. He desperately wanted to see Severus but he knew it was a bad idea. They'd agreed, in light of the situation, to limit the number of times they'd see each other. The Monday night sessions they wouldn't cancel since that would look suspicious, but- as Severus put it- all of their other extracurricular meetings would have to cease. Save for the occasional detention.

But Harry needed Severus to tell him that the feelings of guilt roiling in his gut were unnecessary. That Harry was doing the right thing by what he couldn't help view as cheating. Irrational, Severus would call it, and it was. Still Harry needed to hear him say it and wouldn't be able to until next Monday at 5 o'clock.

Or maybe not. Harry took out a piece of parchment and a quill and scribbled out a quick note. Checking his map once more to make sure he was alone, he said quietly, "Dobby."

There was a crack and the little house-elf appeared before him, eyes brimming with happiness, wearing the usual odd assortment of clothing. "Harry Potter, sir!" Dobby chirped. "Dobby is very glad Harry Potter is calling on him!"

"Hi Dobby," Harry said with an awkward little smile. "How are you?"

"Oh, Harry Potter is so kind to be asking Dobby that! Dobby is doing very well, sir. Dobby is enjoying working in Hogwarts and cleaning up after Harry Potter's noble friends!"

"Err yeah. I'm glad to hear that." Not that Harry thought that sounded like an especially good thing, but Dobby certainly seemed happy. "Listen, Dobby, I need a favor. Can you keep a secret?"

The little creature puffed out his chest importantly. "Dobby is honored to be keeping Harry Potter's secrets, sir. Dobby is not telling anyone, sir. Dobby is shutting his head in the oven before he is telling anyone-"

Harry hurriedly cut him off before he could say anything more. "I appreciate it, Dobby, but I really don't want you hurting yourself, okay?" He handed Dobby the note. "This is for Professor Snape. Give it to him when no one else is around, all right? And don't tell anyone I asked you to do this."

Dobby nodded. "Of course, Harry Potter, sir. Dobby is not letting you down!" And with another sharp crack, Dobby disappeared.

Harry hoisted his bag on his shoulder, feeling some of the irrational guilt dissipate from his gut. He knew he had nothing to confess, that Severus had already known what they were doing, hell, that Severus had told them to do it. Still, he knew he wouldn't feel right about it until Severus wrote back telling him to stop being an idiotic, emotional Gryffindor.

Harry headed back towards Gryffindor Tower instead of to the Great Hall for dinner. This had been part of their plan; both Harry and Malfoy missing at the same time would only add fuel to the rumor mills. Besides, Harry could put of the hundreds of questions of "is it true?" if only for a little while.

Severus felt out of sorts all day. Irritable. Today was the day Harry and Draco were to put the first phase of the plan into action, and he couldn't exactly say he was pleased. The plan involved a certain amount of physical intimacy between the boys- the very reason that they had both protested in the first place- and the thought of it made Severus hot with anger. If only it didn't have to be Draco. Beautiful, wealthy, young, seductive Draco. Draco who had seduced everything gay, bi, or bi-curious in the castle. Draco who was everything Severus wasn't.

Rationally, Severus knew that Draco did not want Harry, which is why he had protested so vehemently against the plan. Still, Severus couldn't help but wonder when this was all over, when Harry had gotten used to kissing Draco, being close to Draco, would he find Severus wanting?

Perhaps it is best, Severus thought to himself, if he falls for Draco. Someone his own age. And he would be a stabilizing influence on Draco. They could be good for each other. Severus drummed his fingers against the wood of the High Table. If they want to be together, I won't stand in their way.

Like hell you won't, the little voice snapped tartly. As if you could stand to see Harry with anyone else, never mind with your godson.

Severus sighed. No good putting the cart before the horse anyway- as far as he knew the boys still loathed each other.

"Severus? Are you all right?"

Severus looked up to see Minerva McGonagall looking at him with concern. He immediately stopped drumming his fingers against the table; she'd known him long enough to recognize the nervous habit. "Yes Minerva just… preoccupied."

She nodded and thankfully didn't ask anything further. She did, however, look pointedly at his plate of mostly uneaten food. "You need to keep up your strength, Severus."

"I do not require a nursemaid."

"You've been sick once already this term," she said firmly in a tone that brooked no argument. "You'll eat or I'll force it down your throat."

A chuckle came from just beyond her. "I'd listen if I were you, Severus," Albus said, his eyes twinkling. "She'll do it, you know."

Glowering, Severus turned back to his plate. "One of these days you'll both realize I'm not your student any longer."

"One of these days you'll stop acting like one," Minerva said cheerfully. "Now tuck in!"

Knowing he'd lost the argument, but not truly caring, Severus obediently ate his food. It had no taste in his mouth, but it was a welcome distraction to the images of Draco shoving his tongue down Harry's throat.

Severus made his way tiredly back to his rooms after dinner, feeling drained. He'd like nothing more to have a glass of wine in front of the fire before going to bed. And if he had more than one glass, or a couple shots of Firewhiskey, well, he'd replenished his stores of hangover potion. But surprisingly, when Severus entered his rooms, he heard the crack that signaled a house-elf's appearance. And by the elf's odd collection of clothing, this was Dobby, the former Malfoy elf that Harry had freed.

"Dobby is having a note for Professor Snape, sir!" the elf chirped, holding out a piece of parchment.

"From whom?" Severus asked curiously, taking the note. Anyone who had wanted to talk to him could have done so moments ago in the Great Hall.

The elf's ears drooped slightly. "Dobby is not saying, sir. Dobby is promising not to tell. Dobby will be shutting his head in the oven if he must."

Severus remembered the Malfoys used to make Dobby punish himself if he did wrong. "That won't be necessary, Dobby. I may have a response. Will you wait?"

The elf brightened at once. "Of course, sir! Professor Snape is very kind to be asking Dobby. Dobby will be waiting all night if he must!"

"That… won't be necessary either. Wait here." Severus went into his lab, closing the door behind him. He sat at a worktable and unfolded the note, unable to suppress a smile at the familiar handwriting inside.

S-

We started the first phase of the plan today. I can't say that I liked it; I was too busy thinking of you. He doesn't kiss half as well as you do. And I know it's stupid, but I couldn't help but feel like I was cheating the entire time. Please reply with something properly biting about my foolish lion sense of loyalty.

I miss you. I wish I could go see you, but I'll have to content myself with a note. Reply soon, okay?

-H

The irritability Severus had felt all day just fell away as he read Harry's note. Tension he hadn't realized he'd been feeling melted out of his muscles. See, a part of him seemed to say, you had nothing to worry about.

Taking out a fresh piece of parchment and a quill, Severus penned his reply.

Random note: I've had Lady Gaga's "Beautiful Dirty Rich" stuck in my head the past two days, so I'd like to dedicate the song to Draco Malfoy. Because he is.

Daddy I'm so sorry, I'm so s-s-sorry, yeah
We just like to party, like to p-p-party, yeah

Bang, Bang.
We're beautiful and dirty rich