I just want to say thank you for all the encouragement and likes, and enjoy all the feels in the new chapter. Next one will probably be up on Saturday.
For a while after their run in with now deceased bullies, Killian lets her spend some time hunting alone and she appreciates his willingness to let her come to terms with what she had done in her own way. Still, he keeps telling her that she did the right thing and kisses her every chance he gets, and she's fairly certain that his love is the only reason she never remembers her nightmares.
Even though she had never thought she'd enjoy stalking her prey, being one with the nature and thinking about nothing at all except her arrow finding its target, she finds that she does. But, no matter how much she likes those quiet moments, she likes being with Killian much more and her outings never last for too long; it's like she's got an internal clock that makes her hurry back home after a certain amount of time apart from him, and she's unable to keep a smile off her face as soon as their cabin comes into view.
Living with yourself after you've killed somebody is much easier when you know who you did it for and when that person doesn't fault you for it, giving you even more love and support than he did before.
Emma wakes to the sound of rain on the tin roof of the cabin, and Killian trailing kisses down her neck. She smiles, her eyes still closed, raising her arms and tangling her fingers in his hair. Her every sense is flooded with him; his smell, the feel of his skin, and the sound of his breathing. As soon as she opens her eyes and meets his ocean blue gaze, they both know that today is the day they finally come together completely, and when he smiles and brings his head down to kiss her she doesn't need air anymore; she's breathing him in, believing for the first time in her life that she can live only on love.
He pulls away and watches her as he sneaks his hand under her shirt, and Emma bites her lip when he cups her breast, his thumb slowly teasing her nipple. She pulls his head down and presses her lips against the stubble on his jaw line, then runs her hands under the edge of his sweatpants and boxers, heat racing through her veins.
Killian tugs at her shirt and she helps him get it off, gasping when his lips close over her nipple, the scruff on his chin feeling divine on her sensitive skin. He smirks at her, the look in his eyes exactly the same as it was when he bandaged her hand up on the beanstalk, tying his scarf around her hand with his teeth. He licks a path to her other breast and she can't wait anymore, she doesn't want to take it slow; she just wants to feel his naked body against hers, right now.
"Too many clothes", she murmurs, gently pushing him away and sliding her hand into his sweatpants, watching as his tongue darts out to wet his lips when her hand closes around him.
She keeps expecting their warning system to start ringing but it doesn't, and she thinks that even if it did, they probably wouldn't hear it over the rain and the sound of their own labored breathing.
"Emma", he grits out her name and wraps her fingers around her wrist, looking at her sternly. "I don't think I'm going to last very long if you keep doing that."
"Okay", she says, letting him go and pulling off his T-shirt. He peels off her pjs slowly, kissing her hip, then her thigh, knee and calf before dropping them off the edge of the bed. Emma makes quick work of his remaining clothes and her panties and he presses his body against hers just so, making her spread her legs wider, her fingers gripping his shoulders. He rolls them over so that she's on top and his hand disappears between them, his fingers driving her a little insane, her hips buckling, her fingers tangling in his chest hair. Breathless little gasps keep coming out of her mouth and he keeps teasing her, driving her almost to the edge and then drawing back until she can't take it anymore. She swats his hand away and leads him inside, their eyes locked together as he slowly enters her, his hand gripping her waist, burning her skin in the most delicious of ways. They move together, finding a rhythm that soon sends them both over the edge, holding onto one another, their cries lost in the sound of the rain.
They spend the entire day in bed, slowly learning each other's bodies as well as they know their own. It doesn't take long for Emma to find out that he's incredibly ticklish on the right side of his ribs, but not at all on the left, that his biceps feel incredible beneath her fingers, like velvet over steel, and that he tries really, really hard to avoid touching her with his stump. When she brings it up he tells her that he doesn't know what she's talking about, his eyes downcast so that she can only see the curve of his eyelashes. A sudden chill comes over her as she remembers her conversation with the creep, and she places her finger under his chin and tilts his head up to make him look at her.
"You could hear us?" She asks him softly, and he doesn't answer right away, debating whether to keep playing dumb or not.
"It's fine. Frankly, I would be more surprised if you wanted me to touch you with it", he says and Emma honestly can't believe her ears. She hadn't really thought much about his stump, beyond the general regret that Rumpelstiltskin had taken his hand from him, and she certainly never wished he wouldn't touch her with it.
What hurts the most is that he thinks he needs to play it all down, and she wonders if his over the top flirting is just a defense mechanism. All evidence points to the conclusion that she's the first woman since Milah that shared a bed with him, and instead of trying to talk some sense into him, she goes for a more direct approach, tracing her fingers down his arm, then running them gently over the jagged scar on his stump.
"No, Emma, you don't have to-" he trails off in a soft voice, trying to pull his arm away, and Emma wraps her fingers around his stump and holds on until he stops struggling.
"Are you done?" She asks, and he nods slowly, looking at her hand, her fingers gently tracing his skin. "That creep said some pretty idiotic stuff, and the only reason I agreed with him was because I needed to make him relax and let go of the rifle. I don't think any of that, and I don't care if you have one hand or five; I want you all the same. I've always wanted you", she says, bringing her free hand up to caress his face.
"Always?" He asks, a half smile tugging at his gorgeous lips.
"From the second you dropped the woe-is-me-poor-blacksmith act", she admits, grinning. "That was some really bad acting, by the way."
"I thought it was one of my finer performances", he objects, and Emma laughs, then grows serious when she remembers that Snow had believed him at first. She realizes that it's the first time today that she found her thoughts turning toward her family, and she feels guilty. No matter how good Killian makes her feel, she can never let herself forget them, not Snow or David, and especially not Henry.
"I wish we could go back", she says, closing her eyes and picturing Henry, his laughter ringing in her ears.
"Someday we will", he says, and Emma loves him for saying that, for sounding like he really believes it.
Fall draws to its end and the weather changes, cold wind blowing from the north, but they only make a fire in the fireplace after dark to avoid the smoke giving their location away. Even with the rifles, the last thing they want is more people stumbling over their cabin, and every time Emma thinks about that day, she feels a shiver going down her spine at the thought of facing something like that again.
Even greater problem than people and zombies coming across their cabin poses the quickly decreasing number of cans they have left. The woods around the cabin are full of wildlife, but they won't be able to survive the winter without fruit and vegetables, which means that they need to go look for food right away, before snow covers the roads and forces them to go on foot.
"We're going to do it quickly, hit one of the Walmarts at the edge of town, take what we need and come back. Won't even take a day", Emma says for the tenth time, still trying to convince herself that it's going to be fine, pacing around the kitchen and wishing she was more like Killian. He approaches their food run like a stroll in the park and she had spent an hour poring over the map of the area and deciding which roads to take.
"Exactly", Killian says, folding the map and getting up from the table. "What's a Walmart again?" He asks her, and Emma smiles, appreciating his effort to ease her tension.
"Do you think we should take the rifles?"
"Definitely not. You saw how many of those buggers firing them attracted last time, and we're practically in the middle of nowhere here."
"You're right", Emma agrees, and they put on their jackets and walk out of the cabin, locking the door and trekking through the woods to the car. He's got his sword and she's got her bow and arrows, and soon they're driving down the road, Emma gripping the steering wheel so tight she's not certain if she'll be able to let it go once they reach their destination.
They pass by a couple of zombies staggering on the side of the road, some deeply ingrained human instinct keeping them from walking in the middle of it, and Emma is grateful that she doesn't have to stop the car and watch Killian take their heads off. She looks at him and marvels at his relaxed pose; he's slouched in his seat, resting his hook on his knee and gazing out the windshield seemingly without a care in the world.
"How can you be so calm?" Emma asks him, and he raises his eyebrow at her.
"If I fell to pieces before every battle, I wouldn't have been a very good Captain to my crew", he says, giving her his best pirate smile.
"That doesn't really help me", Emma says sulkily, turning off the road and into the Walmart parking lot. She shuts off the engine and they sit in the car, waiting to see if anybody attacks them.
"I shall protect you, Emma", he tells her, and Emma leans across the seat to give him a kiss before they exit the car and start toward the store, weapons at the ready.
She knows that it's too much to ask for a nice, zombie-free environment, but she hopes it's just the zombies lurking inside, because recently she's come to the realization that humans are much worse.
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