Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.
A/N Thank you again to all my readers! I appreciate each and every one of you! I have three questions for you all, first how can I change the name of a chapter? Seems simple, but I don't know how. Second, I will be starting a new story shortly, so I have a few ideas. Both of these stories I will write at some point, but I want to ask which I should write first.
Muse – Bella, a brand new dance student at Julliard, receive an assignment to choreograph and perform an original dance that clearly shows an emotion. Edward, an aspiring photographer, receives an assignment, too. He must find some subject to use in many ways for different effects. While searching for inspiration, will they find something more?
The Eye of the Beholder - Bella is a teenage model in NY, but it's not all it's cracked up to be. She never feels thin enough. She never feels pretty enough. She never makes enough money to satisfy Renee. But after an incident, which leads her back to Forks, and her dad. But can this small town and her big crush there, save her from herself?
My last question I also asked last chapter. Do you want an Epilogue? Feel free to respond in a review for this chapter or the next.
Sorry for the long note.
Chapter 11
Eyes
I continued through the woods though it felt like it would kill me to do it. Every step I took away from Edward was a step I regretted. But what could I do? Leave with him? Abandon everything I knew and loved? Well, everything I knew and loved with one exception. The one exception that I would be going with. The one exception that I cared for the most. I felt worse and worse, because he didn't even seem to mind me leaving. It probably made his life easier. It was me they were really after. They wanted to protect Edward from me. They wanted to use him to get me. They only wanted to hurt me. Of course, I knew Edward, just and chivalrous as he was, would never willingly turn me in. It wasn't, because he cared about me. It was, because he believed me. It was, because he was a good person.
That ached even more. I fought myself all the way through the woods, but I knew, I knew the whole time that I was going to run away and hide. I was going to be a child, playing hide and seek. Edward was going to hide with me, to show me where to run. The police weren't going to count to ten. I was wasting time. I couldn't even be sure I'd be able to find Edward again. He had probably left. That didn't stop me from walking on though. I made my way back to the outskirts of Forks, where I knew the cemetery was. I needed permission. I needed someone to tell me it was okay to be childish. I went to my parents.
I knelt between the graves. I fought back tears. I felt so much lighter than I ever had here. I felt no guilt on my shoulders, pushing down, trying to push me into a grave, into hell. I didn't hate myself for the things I'd done, because I hadn't done anything wrong at all. I'd been a good girl most of my life with my parents, and I'd spent every moment at the Retreat trying futilely to prove to myself that I deserved to live. I finally felt like I'd proved I did deserve to live. I suddenly felt wronged, as if someone had stolen from me, and I had never noticed what they had taken. Now I wanted it. Now I needed it. It would kill me not to have it. But it was gone. I felt hollow, too. Maybe that's what the thief had taken. My heart and soul, and now I wanted to love and be loved, but I couldn't do either. I couldn't do anything.
I looked at the marble head stones. "I miss you," I said. "I miss you everyday," I said. That was how I greeted them every year, on the anniversary of their death I would be taken, handcuffed and guarded out to the cemetery. I would kneel in between their headstones and I would say that. Then I would cry. I would say I'm sorry and I would beg forgiveness in front of every one who came. Dr. Gray and Felix and Nurse Greco would stand over me and say nothing. They looked down on me, not with sympathy, but with apathy. No one cared about a murders pain. The headstones would not move or change in anyway. They always stared back. Today I said something else. "I have to leave you. I have to because it will save my life. I have to, because I deserve that life. But I'll always come back. I will look after you, and I will remember you. I loved you," I murmured. I stood up and turned my head towards a shuffling. The police? I panicked.
Instead a tall dark skinned man with black hair stepped forth. He flashed those shiny white teeth and I was shocked.
"I knew I'd find you here, Bella," Jacob grinned.
"Jacob," I said, shocked. Before I could decide if this was better or worse, there was a flash of silver at his throat and red poured over his russet skin down to stain his white T-shirt. His eyes widened and he lifted his hand to his throat. He looked like a child despite his size. His eyes were so bewildered and helpless. He crumpled to the grass, one hand still at his throat. He managed to lay himself face up, before he stopped moving all together. I swallowed convulsively. I couldn't look away from his frozen form lying beside the graves of my parents. When I tore my eyes from him, I gasped. It was worse than the police. So much worse.