AN: Thank you all for reading and sticking with this
Disclaimer: SM owns all things Twilight
Out of the Woods
I started to push myself towards the tritone that was filling the normal quiet of the woods. Never once looking back, there was no need I knew the nameless man would be gone as soon as the sound of the cruiser reached his ears. I didn't have much time to decide if I should run into the woods and let my unknowing savior pass me by or if I should allow for them to find me. As I was waring with myself, fate took my choice away from me, because the police issued sedan began to slow and eventually stop in front of me. A woman, tan in complexion with her dark hair in a tight bun, removed herself from the driver side door.
"Bella?" she asked softly as she approached me cautiously. "My name is Emily Uley, I'm an officer for Forks police."
I just stared at her, but lost the control I had on my emotions when she placed her hand slowly on my shoulder. It started with a small shiver up my spine, water leaked through my eyes and soon my lungs began fighting for air. Emily brought me to her body and sat me down on the side of the road and gently rocked me as she ran her hand through my tangled locks. Words of comfort were whispered to me; all in an attempt to calm me and bring me and my body some kind of peace.
While my body began to find its equilibrium, Emily began a garbled conversation through her radio with the police dispatcher
"This is badge number 282007, Officer Emily Uley, reporting 10-57 found, Isabella Swan. Do you copy."
"10-4 Officer Uley, what is your location?"
"Copy, we are at mile marker 52 going south on US 101, Code 4 will bring Isabella to Forks General Hospital."
"10-4, Office Uley Chief Swan requested use of lights and will meet you at stated destination."
"Copy, Officer heading to destination, over and out"
"Alright Bella let's get you home, okay?" Emily asked once she was finished with her conversation.
I nodded as she helped me stand and led me to the passenger door. Once I was settled and Emily was in the drivers side she started heading towards Forks.
I leaned my head against the cool of the glass and watched the blur of white and green. I wasn't able to think about what would happen once we arrived at the hospital. I simply didn't let myself process what had happened at the dance or in the woods. It was like the darkness was encroaching in on me, but in a much crueler fashion by refusing to let my senses rest. When we got closer to our destination I pulled the jacket that Emily gave me tighter across my body to provide some sort of comfort.
We pulled up to the all to familiar building. It was an odd experience coming here and actually being able to view the journey. I didn't move once she stopped the car, just looked at the concrete bricks that made up the pillar signaling the entrance to the ER. This was when my senses finally started to give, I felt the cold air as it hit my body when the door was opened, I felt the muscular arms encompass me, but the words spoken were mumbled and eventually that was gone too. As I was being taken into the hospital the images began to fade, and soon I no longer felt the warm arms.
Ж
The subtle beeping of my old friend and mumbled words welcomed the first of my senses as it returned. Next I felt the tiny pin pricks of electricity that was flowing through my warm hand, as another squeezed it. Last to come was my sight, but this was always the most difficult to return to, the lights stung so I kept my eyelids shut to prolong the inevitable. While I maintained my dark vision I was able to focus on the words being said.
"Emmett, I swear like I did last night and will forever, I'm not positive what happened. She left to go to the bathroom. She was gone a while and I went to go look for her when Tanya came up to me. She kept going on about how I could stop pretending, that she would forgive me for slumming it. I told her that I was done with her lying whore ass self"
"Edward" Charlie admonished.
"Sorry chief. Anyways I told her we were done this summer when I caught her messing around with Jessica's cousin from Port Angeles. I said that I was in love with Bella and she should just leave and stop embarrassing herself. Jessica and Lauren came out of the bathroom and said no one else was in there. That's when I went and found you."
"Emmett, we don't know what happened and we won't until she wakes up. I know, believe me I know waiting for her to show us her brown eyes is painful, but at least we can take comfort that she is hear, alive, and we can thank every deity anyone in the world believes in that she was able to fight off whoever attacked her." Charlie said with a scratchy and emotion filled voice.
"I know pop, sorry Edward, but you guys know I love her, she's my sister and it pisses me off to know end that she can't catch a god damn break."
"Emmett, Bella was kept in this world for a reason, and she is a survivor. I just pray this is the last time she needs to survive and she can actually start to live. She's my little girl and I've loved her since the moment I knew of her conception, and nearly died when I thought she was gone forever. We will find who did this and"
I didn't hear the rest of what Charlie said because I started to sob. These three men loved me, why I ever doubted them I will never know. My own stupidity began to weigh on me as I realized that the events that had taken place could have been prevented had I just listened. Once again fate has proven that I did deserve what I got because of my sure idiocy.
I felt warm comforting arms encircle my body as my hand was squeezed in Edwards. Charlie kept telling me to hush and saying things would be okay, somehow they would be okay. I didn't even noticed that it came out of my mouth but the word was out there "Daddy..." Charlie held me tighter.
"Oh baby girl, it's okay, we're going to figure it out." He whispered as he kissed my forehead.
The sound of the door opening alerted all of us to another occupant in the room.
"Edward, Emmett could you leave for a minute please." Dr. Cullen said, obviously meaning for the please to be a form of manners and not really giving the two an actual option. However, both did not pick up on this as the grumbled and moaned as to why they shouldn't leave.
"Enough, please leave, you can sit outside the room, but I need to talk to Charlie and Bella." Dr. Cullen's voice was firm, but still even and not raised. "Thank you" he added as they left after each bade me a small good bye.
"Bella, baby, you need to tell us what happened and we need you to start at the beginning." Charlie said as he placed another kiss on my forehead. I nodded and began the tale from when Edward and I arrived at the dance. Both men remained quiet as I spoke my tale, Charlie would squeeze tighter in times when I needed the support.
"Alright, Bella you're going to need to tell that to an officer, and I'll be there if you want me to." Charlie said, I agreed knowing that I really didn't have a choice in the matter.
"Bella, it doesn't look like anything is wrong physically with exception to some bruises and scrapes. Your feet are pretty torn up also, so I will give you some instructions for care before you leave. So I'm going to go get your discharge papers ready. Charlie please talk to her about what we discussed." Charlie nodded at Carlisle as he watched him leave the room.
"Baby, I know we talked about this and I was going to let you tell me when you were ready, but I think you need to go talk to someone, a professional."
I cut his argument off "Okay, I think that would be good." His smile said anything and everything I needed. I made a choice, one that was needed and healthy for me and everyone. I needed to get healthy and talking to a therapist, someone unbiased seemed to be the best way.
Ж
December 18th, 2009
"Isabella Swan" I raise my hand and follow the tall woman with graying hair back into her office.
"Sit where ever you like Isabella."
"Bella" I mumble and sit on the oversized chair with my good leg folded under the other.
"Bella, I want to introduce myself. I'm Dr. Kathrine Jensen, but you can call me Kate alright."
I respond with my signature nod and she continues speaking.
"I know the logistics about what has happened to you in your life and I want you to know that you direct this. You get to choose what we work on first if anything. I also want to be honest with you I'm not here to be your friend, I'm here as a tool for you to use so you are able to live. Things that happen in here will not be roses. There are times when I'm going to want to meet with you and different family members and sometimes just them. I will not tell them what we discuss unless you give me permission too. The reason I want to speak with them is sometimes people who are your supports are able to see things that you may not realize. Do you understand, if you don't it's okay and I can explain a little further alright."
I looked at the woman who seemed to be in fairly good shape, she looked younger than her gray and brown hair would indicate. She seemed nice and I knew I needed to be here for everyone and myself.
"I understand."
"Great, so today I want to get to know you a little bit more and also discuss some of the things we agree should be worked on and hopefully put them in an order. Next time we will take the first item, set some goals and dive in if that is alright with you."
I agreed and the rest of that first hour we talked about the basics of my life thus far, where I lived, who I lived with, what I enjoy doing for fun, to relax, who I spend my time with now. Toward the end of the session I began to really like Kate, she listened to what I said and included me on the plan on how my treatment was going to work. We decided together that we should work on issues with my mother first as they may be tied into the other items we had on our list.
She asked that I stay in the waiting room while she talked to Charlie for a few minutes. I had agreed that she could talk to him about today's session and each week I would decide depending on what was talked about.
December 23rd, 2009
"Hi Bella, Charlie" Kate greeted as she indicated for me to follow her into her office. I took the same seat as last week and thankfully didn't need to rest my leg on the stool that sat in front of the chair as my leg was feeling better.
"How was your week Bella?"
I shrugged but that got me narrowed eyes from Kate.
"It was odd I guess. We didn't have school because of winter vacation and everybody was getting ready for Christmas."
She looked at me for a moment before asking a question.
"What did you do while every one was getting things ready?"
"I don't know. I stayed in my room and read a lot. Edward came over and watched a movie with me."
"Why didn't you help get the house ready?"
"I guess I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to interrupt their traditions."
"Why did you think you would be interrupting?"
"Um, no one asked me to help and normally I would ask, but this just seemed so intimate, I felt I would be intruding."
"What were your holiday's like before you came to live with your dad?"
I flinched as the memories hit me.
"They were a lot like my birthdays. Renee was usually home in the morning on Christmas and she asked that I make breakfast for her. When I was old enough I knew to save as much money as I could in December so I could afford all the things she liked to eat that day, eggs, sausage, pancake mix, or whatever else. After I gave her the food in her room I went back to the kitchen to clean. She always found something wrong with the food, even though she ate all of it. She would leave at some point after she punished me and I would spend the rest of the day alone. Sometimes she wouldn't come home, I always wished she wouldn't come home."
I hadn't realized that tears had fallen down until Kate placed a box of Kleenex in front of me.
"Bella, remember how we said I would be a tool for you."
I nodded while I wiped my face.
"Okay, in order to do that I need to know details. Thank you for telling me about your past holidays, but you skipped over some information and I think it would be helpful for us both to talk about it, alright?"
"okay"
"Bella, can you tell me what your punishments were?"
"The last Christmas she said I had burned the eggs. I was in the kitchen getting ready to poor the grease that was in the sausage pan in the sink so I could start the dishes. She came in yelling at me, I don't remember what she said."
"That's okay Bella, you are doing really well, can you tell me what happened when she got into the kitchen?"
"She put her hand over mine and took the pan out of my grasp. Then she slammed it onto the floor by where I was standing. The hot grease splashed up and hit my legs, which thankfully were covered in jeans. It still caused some small burns though. As she was screaming she grabbed my hair and pulled me into the living room. I was on the ground and she started kicking me. Eventually she tired of her kicks or she was too drunk to stay vertical any longer because she straddled me on the ground and started slapping, anywhere she could reach she would hit. She must have looked at the clock because she got up and went to get ready for where ever it was she went. On her way out she kicked me one more time and told me to clean up the mess I made. I thought she meant in the kitchen, but when I got up I saw the blood that had seeped into the carpet. I looked at my arms and saw she had opened a scab."
"Good job Bella. Do you think you can answer more questions, remember we can stop whenever you need to."
I just shrugged and waited for her to ask. I didn't see her scowl at my non verbal because I was focusing on the floor, it was easier.
"Why did you wish she wouldn't come home?"
"We had an old black and white TV. I wasn't allowed to watch it, but on Christmas they always played It's a wonderful life. I would watch it over and over again. One time Renee didn't meet anyone or she was stood up, I'm not really sure. I think I was 13 at the time. She came home and I had fallen asleep with the TV on. I don't remember what she did to me that night because I had blacked out. I'm pretty sure some ribs were broken though."
"Bella, do you believe you're not allowed to celebrate Christmas?"
"I don't know, no one ever told me."
"Bella would it be alright if I talked to your dad for a few minutes about what you said and then the three of us can talk."
"Alright."
Kate led me to the waiting room and asked Charlie to come speak with her. I sat in a chair and pulled out my phone. I had a text message waiting for me.
Can I see you tonight buttercup?
My response was simple yes
Edward and I spent time together and he would cuddle with me, but we hadn't kissed anymore. I don't know if I did something wrong or if he did decide to go back to Tanya. I was too afraid to ask. I still hadn't told anyone but Charlie and Carlisle what had happened that day, and Emmett was the only one who asked. Before I was able to dive further into my mind to figure out how I felt about that Kate called me back into her office.
Charlie was sitting on the couch and Kate waited for me to take my seat. Instead of heading for the overstuffed chair I sat next to Charlie. When I looked at him I saw the streaks left by tears on his cheeks.
"Bella I told Charlie what you had said and he wants to talk to you okay. Charlie go ahead."
"Baby girl, I'm sorry. I guess we had assumed you knew you could celebrate Christmas. We had just figured you didn't want too."
"So, I can?"
"Yes baby girl."
"But I can't afford any gifts."
"Bella, look at me. I can give you money to go get people gifts or you can make them. Whatever you want. We are a family and we help each other."
"Charlie, Bella I want to make a suggestion, as I told both of you before if my suggestions don't work we can work with them to make them the most beneficial for Bella."
Both Charlie and I gave our acknowledgment of her statement.
"I think what needs to happen is when you are home, Bella you need to ask if you are unsure of anything. You will not get punished in any form for asking. Charlie I think you and Sue need to make a more conscious effort to acknowledge and not just assume that Bella knows she is to participate or rather has the option too. If you don't do this there is a chance that your relationship will drift farther apart, because."
We both agreed to do this, and Charlie asked if he could tell Sue and Emmett what we talked about today, all of it. I said we could, but that I wanted to be there.
February 12th, 2010
"Hi Bella" Kate said as she once again directed me into her office. We each took our normal seats and she began.
"How have you been this week?
"Good, I told Edward that I loved him."
"Really, and what did he have to say to that."
I blushed before I answered.
"he kissed me."
"Did he say it back?"
"No, but only because he said it first."
"Bella did you mean it?"
"Of course I meant it, why would I say it if I didn't?" I asked sounding a little insulted, because I was. How could she think I don't love him.
"That's good Bella. I didn't mean to imply you didn't have those feelings. It's just we have talked about how sometimes your actions and words are based on your desire to please others. You have been getting really good at deciphering when to put yourself first or others first."
"Oh" was my brilliant reply.
"Bella, I need to ask how you are feeling about James and Jacob being arrested?"
I sat for a minute trying to word my answer. James had been identified last week after he was arrested for breaking and entering with intent to steal. His DNA was a match to the DNA found under my finger nails. I identified him in a line up shortly after, and because of his statement to me that he was one of the men who took me from the Stanley home he was arrested on those charges as well. He quickly cut a deal after he ratted out all parties involved. Jacob Black, Jessica Stanley- who was his cousin, and Tanya Denali, who he had been sleeping with.
Jessica and Tanya were still under investigation, but the police department hadn't been able to get enough evidence just yet to press charges. Charlie was not pleased about this, but he knew to follow procedures so that they would not be released on technicalities.
"I'm okay. I'm happy that they were caught. I'm angry that Jessica and Tanya haven't been arrested. I'm worried about Emmett and Edward and the guilt they each seem to be feeling, because they seem to think they let these people into my lives. No matter how many times I tell them it wasn't their fault or anyone's except the people who actually did the acts."
"That was really good Bella. You have every right to feel all of those things. I want to talk to your Dad for a minute is it okay if I bring him in here."
I gave her my permission and she returned a short while later with Charlie.
"So, I think we can take Bella down to 1 session every other week. Her panic attacks and nightmares have gone down and she is verbalizing her feelings really well. Also from what you two and the rest of the people involved here have been reporting things are improving."
I smiled because I was getting better, things were hard at times and we all reverted to our old ways at other times.
Charlie said that would be fine, and he left the room at the end of the session, but Kate held me back.
"Bella, I expect full details on your valentines date with Edward when I see you next."
AN: I hope you all enjoyed there will be one more chapter and an epilogue.