Chapter 11

"Why did he kiss me?" I mumbled as I lightly moved my fingers to the place where his lips had laid. I was sitting on the edge of the bed in my pajamas, replaying in my head what had taken place that night for the hundredth time. However, it wasn't just the kiss what kept me up all night, but also the realization that, for the first time in my life, I was in love.

"Kagome, breakfast's ready!" My mom yelled from downstairs.

"I'll come down in a sec!" I stood up and walked to my dresser to get a rubber band to fix my hair. "Ugh, I look horrible." I said as I looked at the reflection of my tired face in the mirror. I put my hair up and then went to the bathroom to wash my teeth and face. "I guess I look a bit better now…" I said, not totally convinced.

I walked out of the bathroom and went downstairs to get breakfast. My heart beat faster as I got closer to where he currently was, and I feared what my reaction would be when finally I saw him. I hoped that I wouldn't let him know how I had been awake when he kissed me.

"Finally, there you are dear. How are you feeling?" My mom said as she came out of the living room.

"All better." I smiled.

"Good." She smiled back. "I left you some food on the table. I have to leave now, and Izanagi and Inuyasha are done eating, but they will still be around for a bit so you won't be all alone."

"Ok. Have a good day at work!"

"Thanks dear." She said as she put on her shoes at the house entrance.

I turned left and went into the living room. There I found Izanagi watching some obnoxious early morning TV show. Well, that's what I thought until I got closer and saw that his eyes were completely closed and his mouth wide open. I couldn't help but giggle.

"He's never been a morning person." I heard coming from somewhere behind me. I turned around and there he was, coming into the living room wearing dark blue sweat pants and no T-shirt whatsoever.

"Good morning, Inuyasha…" I tried very hard not to blush or show the nervousness that rose within me due to him being around and, to top it all, half naked.

"Good morning." He walked towards the free couch while eating an apple and then sat down.

I kept staring at him almost unconsciously, replaying the memory in my head and then trying to figure out his motive once again. I don't know how long had passed by the time I heard Inuyasha talk to me.

"Kagome are you ok? Is there some apple on my face?" He touched his lips and chin.

"Uh, no. No, I was just thinking about something important and it just happened that I was looking in your direction. My eyes weren't even focusing on anything in particular. Has that happened to you?" I smiled, but I was pretty sure that my story wasn't very convincing.

"Yeah…" he replied.

'Damn it, he can feel my awkwardness! I have to get out of here!' I thought.

"I'm…uh… going to get ready for school now." I walked towards the door.

"Aren't you gonna eat something?"

I looked to my left at the lonely plate sitting on the table. I was quite hungry, but I had already failed enough in my attempt at indifference to stay in a room with him any longer.

"I'm not hungry. You can have it." I left the room without looking back and went upstairs.

Before I even opened the door to my room I heard my phone ringing like crazy. 'It's probably Sango, considering how early it is.' I thought. I went into the room and got my phone from the desk. It was indeed Sango.

"Hey Sango"

"Good morning!" She said cheerfully.

"Why are you so excited?" I started to look in the closet for clothes to wear."What happened to you?"

"It's not to me that something great has happened."

"It's too early for guessing Sango. What's up?"

"Ayumi and Inuyasha are no longer going out!"

"What?" A pair of pants fell out of my hand. I couldn't have heard that. It was my imagination.

"They broke up!"

"Wh-When?" I sat down on my bed.

"Last night! They ended up breaking up by the end of their date."

"Who told you this?" I still couldn't believe it.

"Eri. Ayumi called her this morning, and you know Eri. She can't keep her mouth closed for too long."

"I can't believe it."

"Have you seen him today?"

"Yes, and he seemed normal. Not at all like someone who has just been through a break up."

"Well, he does like somebody else."

I was silent for a bit, no longer feeling the need to contradict this kind of comments which Sango liked so much.

"Kagome?"

"Uh?"

"You didn't say anything."

"About what?"

"My comment. You usually deny all of them." She paused. "Oh my God! You did what I told you and it worked, didn't it? You realized your feelings!"

"Yeah" I felt myself blush. "Yes, I…I love him… I shouldn't, but I do. I should have listened to you earlier."

"weetie, I'm so happy it worked. How are you feeling?"

"Confused"

"Don't worry, that's completely normal. You had never been in love before."

"That's not the main reason though. It feels strange and awkward to be around him, like I expected, but…"

"But, what?"

"I think you were right too about Inuyasha liking me."

"Really? Why?"

"Something happened last night."

"Something… like what?" She got serious.

"He kissed me."

"He did what?" I could tell by her tone of voice that her mouth was hanging open out of astonishment. "But, when did it happen? He was on the date until late, according to what Eri told me."

"Right after he got back from the date he came to my room."

"You should have told me that before! What did you say? What did he say?"

"He… thought I was asleep."

"But you weren't."

"I was faking."

"Ah... Well, in any case, congratulations sweetie! Everything is unraveling like it should." The she paused. "Wait. Why did you say that you are confused then? You seem to have everyone's feelings in order now. I don't understand."

"It's just… I don't know what to do now. The guy I love is single and likes me back but… he's my mom's boyfriend's son, and he went out and just broke up with one of my good friends. If I went for it I could hurt so many people…"

"I know sweetie."

"But I really want to be with him." I sighed. "I feel so happy and safe when I am with him. When he looks at me I feel so sure of myself and… special. I feel how much he cares. And those late night talks we've had… they are among the most precious moments of my life. I don't—" I felt my eyes tearing up.

"Kags, c'mon we gotta go!" Inuyasha yelled as he knocked on my locked door. I jumped up, frightened by his sudden appearance.

"You go ahead, I will be a bit longer." I yelled back nervously.

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"Fine. See you at school!" I heard his footsteps moving away and then going down the stairs.

"Kagome?" I heard coming from my cell, which I had forgotten about.

"Yes Sango, sorry."

"Do you think he heard you talking?" She asked.

"No, I don't think so. My door is pretty thick, and if he had been listening he would probably have stayed longer to listen, since I wasn't done talking."

"I guess it doesn't matter if he heard anyways. You will be telling him how you feel soon enough."

"I will?"

"Yes." She sighed. "Kagome, you have always been there for other people, but never for yourself. You have taken care of your single mom all of your life, making her happy and never worrying her by being a good student and an overly obedient daughter, even when you became a teenager and were supposed to defy your parents. You cared for me and taught me to enjoy life more back when I was fat and made fun of, even though other kids then made fun of you for being pretty and choosing to hang out with me rather than with the popular kids. You even went out with Koga just to make him, Eri, Ayumi, and Yuka happy! And there are so many other examples. C'mon sweetie, worry about yourself for once. Make yourself happy!"

"I really want to… But what if my mom finds out and leaves Izanagi. She's never been this happy before."

"You are doing it again."

"It's an important thing to think about. I can't just ignore it." I really wanted to ignore it, but…

"You wouldn't be doing anything wrong because you are not related by blood. You are just two people who happened to fall in love. And if your parent's love is so strong they will understand you and stay together no matter what." She sighed. "Inuyasha seems to be able to see this since he took the initiative."

"Fine. But, what about Ayumi?" I kept making up excuses almost unconsciously since, as Sango had said, I cared about other people more than myself.

"Talk to her first. Tell her about your feelings and how you do want her to get hurt. If she's really your friend, she'll want you to be happy. And if she doesn't agree, well, she hasn't been very nice to you lately…"

"That doesn't sound like you. You hate confrontation."

"But I love you more than I hate confrontation, Kagome. I want you to be happy, even if that involves Ayumi hating both of us. She should have been a better friend to you, especially since often you have allowed her to step over you and outshine you just so that she could be happy. And how has she repaid you? Talking behind your back the moment someone took interest in you rather than her."

"Sango…"

"You know it's true. You know you deserve it. Go for it."

I was silent for a minute, analyzing everything I had felt and thought about since I met Inuyasha, and everything I had talked about with Sango. In a second I came up with more excuses in my head.

However, deep inside I knew that, no matter how much longer I postponed this conversation, I had already known for a while what I wanted, what I was going to do; I knew that was going to give in to my desires.

"I will." I said as I smiled to myself.