Chapter 11: With Open Arms

I groggily woke up to my alarm buzzing in my ear the next morning. After smacking my hand against the button, I stared around my room, confused. How did I get in here? The last thing I remembered was collapsing on the couch after school. Now I was in my bed. I must have come up to my room in the middle of the night.

I pushed myself up and yawned, lifting my arms above my head as I arched my back and pointed my toes. My muscles felt oddly stiff, and I could only guess that I slept in one position all night. Ruffling my hair, I started toward the bathroom to grab a quick shower, hoping the hot water wouldn't only wake me up but also soothe my sore muscles.

By the time I stepped out of the bathroom, steam floating into the air behind me, the sun was starting to come up. Sun shone through the blinds, providing the only illumination in the room. As I got dressed, I started thinking about how today would go. It was the middle of the week. Hardly anything interesting happened on any day but Friday.

Yesterday was a different story, considering the encounter with Quil. I had to admit, it was a little gutless of me to make him the messenger boy. But I had my reasons for keeping my distance.

Then again, so did Jacob.

I was the one hurting him, after all. So why did I cry last night? I was being a baby, a coward. I couldn't handle the consequences of my actions, which made me quite the child. Jacob wasn't just anyone; he was special. Whether he was next to me or away from me, we were oppositely charged magnets, drawn to each other despite the distances. Well, it felt that way at least, and I didn't think I would ever understand it.

I fortunately found a parking spot next to Hayley at school. Once I stepped up the curb and under the canopy, I noticed Ryan and Natalie standing there, a small earpiece in either of their ears. Ryan saw me, waving and pointing at the music player in his hand, grinning. I smiled weakly, nodding in acknowledgement.

Hayley came out of the office just as I passed. I gave her a look, asking, "What were you doing in there?"

She held up the paper in her hands. "I was just getting a copy of the schedule for our exams next week. Here." She handed me a pink sheet.

"Thanks."

On the way to first period, I pathetically searched the faces that occupied the hall. What was the point? Jacob obviously wasn't going to show. I didn't blame him for being upset with me, and if torture was his way of punishing me, I was okay with it. Didn't I deserve it?

By the time we reached the classroom, I hadn't given up. My eyes danced around the hallway. Hayley cleared her throat after a moment, staring at me as she held the door. I glanced from her to the hall again, but when she coughed a second time, I sighed and went inside.

It was official. I blew it with Jacob.

. . . . . . . . . .

I sat against my locker during study period while Hayley discussed finals next to me. She rambled on about how ugly they were first semester as I scanned the schedule she had given me earlier, seeing when and where certain exams would take place.

"The algebra exams are the worst, so make sure you practice," she was saying.

"As if the subject wasn't painful enough," I mumbled.

Hayley pursed her lips. "Nat's the best at it. I'll have to study with her."

"I might join you," I said. "A B average won't pass at home."

"You're doing better than me!"

I giggled lightly. "Like you said, study more." She whacked me on my knee.

"Whatever."

I set the schedule down. "Hales, you're better at biology than I am. Will you do me the honor of tutoring me, a pathetic and hopeless sophomore with a C?" I begged, poking out my lower lip.

She saw my look and rolled her eyes. "You're ridiculous," she teased, which earned giggles on both sides. "Hey, you know what? This weekend we should go to the beach. Hang out before finals and everything."

I blinked. "Shouldn't we do that after we finish finals?"

She shrugged. "Yeah, that too."

"Whatever works, I guess. You know how much I love the beach."

"Is that one of the reasons you liked the party so much?"

"The water fight helped. I haven't laughed that hard in the longest time." A memory came to me, one with Jacob. "Well, maybe I've come close," I whispered.

Hayley proved to be my closest friend when she sensed the problem, patting my knee. "At least the party helped you forget about him for a while."

I hummed in agreement, not knowing how else to respond. A short silence passed between Hayley and me, during which I finally managed to focus on a subject other than Jacob. I opened my mouth to speak, but upon seeing my friend's expression, I hesitated. "…Hayley?"

The green hues in her eyes brightened as she gazed down the hall. She nudged me, not even sparing me a glance. "Sarah…"

Confused, I slowly turned my head to look down the hall. The sight that greeted me was both relieving and nerve-wracking. A particular group of people were coming down the hall, casually passing their classmates. They stepped gracefully over outstretched legs without a glance down. Their skin stood out among the other students', and it was a little difficult pinpointing who was who because of the identical haircuts. Embry led the pack, with Quil close behind.

Embry looked at me, his dark eyes falling on my blue. He graced me a gentle smile and small nod as he passed. Quil acknowledged my presence with a simple smile, which I kindly returned.

Hayley grabbed my arm at some point, and her grip tightened as the two boys passed. I almost protested such a vice grip, but then I saw the look in her eyes: excitement.

"Hayley?" I called softly. She wouldn't look at me, still staring down the hall. She shook my arm roughly, urging me to turn my head. I did as suggested, spotting a third figure trailing quite a ways behind Embry and Quil.

I felt like I was going to hurl.

Wandering down the hall, head ducked, he stared at the floor. From my seat, I recognized the look on his face; he was pensive, subconsciously stepping over legs with just as much grace as his friends. His hands were tucked into his pockets, a slight slouch to his posture. I would have thought he didn't care how he looked today, but the fitted shirt and gelled hair told me otherwise.

His good looks were going to kill me someday, I just knew it.

Hayley's grip was numbing my arm, but as oblivious as Jacob was to the world around him, I ignored the pain. My heart beat furiously against my chest, so loud I could hear my pulse.

I froze when he gazed at me. A coat of sadness smothered the usually warm and sincere look in his eyes. The anger seemed to be gone, but another emotion lingered: desire. As he strolled down the hall, his eyes stayed in line with mine. Only when he passed me did he look away. I stared after him, stiff as a board, even when he joined his friends at the end of the hall.

Hayley finally released my arm. "Um…"

For the first time, she was speechless. All I could do was stare at the floor. I couldn't ignore the look Jacob gave me; he was clearly a mess. Cowardly, I peeked in his direction. His back was still to me, but Embry and Quil were clearly talking to him. Embry's eyes flickered to me and back, which alerted me to the fact that I was the subject.

"Sarah," Hayley whispered. "Go talk to him."

I blinked, eyes widening. "What? No!" I hissed, frantically shaking my head.

"Go, now! You have to!"

I glanced from her to Jacob, who was peeking over his shoulder. He and his friends were all staring at me. I quickly looked away. "What would I even say?"

Hayley looked at me as if I had grown two heads. "Apologize, duh!"

I covered my reddening face with my hands and groaned. Who was I kidding? I wasn't prepared for this! Within all of the time Jacob and I had been apart, I never even thought of what I was going to say!

The bell rang, and I quietly shrieked, jumping slightly. The things this kid did to me…

"Are you going to lunch?" Hayley asked.

I glanced from her to Jacob, who was still talking to his friends. "Uh…"

She tucked her copper hair behind her ear, discreetly eyeing the three boys further down the hall. I followed suit, both of us witnessing the discussion occurring between Jacob, Embry, and Quil. Hayley looked back at me, confused. "What do you think they're saying?"

"I'm not sure," I said with a shake of my head. "It looks like they're encouraging him, but…to do what?"

When we looked back, Embry and Quil were coming down the hall. Hayley's head turned sharply, her eyes wide in alarm. She and I seemed to be thinking the same thing: did they hear us? She didn't look at them as they passed, but I did. They stared at me, which didn't surprise me one bit. They were just talking about me, after all.

When they left for the cafeteria, Hayley and I simultaneously gazed at who had been abandoned. My heart leaped when I discovered he was looking back.

Hayley patted me on the leg and jumped to her feet. "Good luck!" she whispered. With wide eyes I watched her go, cursing her for leaving me alone. I stared until she turned the corner, out of sight.

Nervously I pressed my lips together, scared to see who was obviously staring at me. The weight of his gaze gave him away. Gathering the courage, I finally risked a glance toward Jacob, whose eyes fell immediately. A few seconds passed before he looked back, and the expression he wore stunned me.

It was breathtaking. Adorable, but in a sad way.

I bit my lip as we gazed at each other from a distance. His eyes weren't intimidating like last week, when his gaze had been so intense that I was forced to shy away. Now it was different. His eyes held mine with a softness I had never seen before. It held me in place, my muscles locked. The tension in the air was too thick to breathe.

But then he offered me the smallest smile, and the aura thinned. I almost melted away at the small curve of his lips. Jacob always found a way to comfort me, even with a problem between us.

I stopped breathing when he started toward me, his hands coming out of his pockets. I wanted to get up, to meet him halfway so I didn't seem like such a coward, but my body refused to move. As he advanced, he hardly made a sound. It was an addition to his grace, another positive feature, among many others.

I tilted my head as he got closer. His eyes held mine, but I didn't dream of looking away. When he stopped in front of me, both of us could only stare, amazed at the sight of each other again. His faint smile was still against his lips as he looked down on me, and I welcomed the heat that radiated off his body with open arms.

Jacob offered me his hand. "I think we need to talk," he gently declared. His voice triggered warmth, and I was grateful to hear it again. It was then that I realized how much I missed it, the smooth tone. I felt like I found something I'd lost.

The corners of my lips turned up ever so slightly as I looked away from his handsome face to his hand. I slid mine into his, a tingle enveloping my skin when we made contact. His fingers encircled my smaller hand and chills traveled down my spine.

Jacob helped me to my feet, and when I was standing in front of him our eyes met once more. Within close proximity, I caught the light in his eyes again, and I felt comfort in just knowing that. The way he kept his hold on my hand aided that feeling, but nothing felt as good as my hand in his. Even if it did swallow my own, there was just something right about it.

He led me through the halls, gripping my hand securely. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He was gone, but now he was here. It felt like a dream to see him again. At the same time, his presence was invigorating. I began to feel more confident in this confrontation as he took me out into the sunlight, approaching a nearby bench.

Jacob released my hand and touched the small of my back, motioning with his arm for me to have a seat. I followed his request, sitting myself down on the bench. He sat down next to me with a sigh, and I lowered my eyes to my lap.

I had to say something. It would only be right if I apologized first.

"Look, I'm—"

"Sorry that I—" he started at the same time, and we looked at each other, eyes wide in surprise. He chuckled shyly and rubbed the back of his head. I weakly smiled, glancing away.

"Um," I started, pressing my lips together. "Maybe I should go first." Jacob smiled slightly, nodding and encouraging me to continue. I forced myself to look away, not wanting to stare. Nervous as hell, I could barely breathe. "About last week… I'm sorry for everything. I was being really inconsiderate of you. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions." I peeked at him. "We could have avoided this, um, situation if it weren't for me."

Jacob looked away. "Yeah…"

"I'm sorry," I said again, my voice pathetically weak. Jacob noticed, his brown eyes darting to me in a flash. The look on his face was full of pain. I blinked in shock. "I-I shouldn't have yelled at you. You didn't deserve that."

Jacob smiled, but it was forced. "I get everything I deserve."

"…You were just being nice."

He shook his head sadly, replying, "I was a bit forward. Admit it."

I pressed my lips together, my eyes locked on him. Unfortunately he was right; he did come on a little strong, but it was harmless.

"I freaked you out, which was what I was trying to avoid. A lot of people find me to be a little…intimidating. I mean, look at me." He smiled without humor. "I'm not surprised you were scared."

Stunned, I stared at Jacob. My eyebrows furrowed. "You're too sweet to scare me, Jacob."

He didn't speak, staring at the concrete in confusion before finding me. His expression appeared to lighten once my words sank in, even if he seemed shocked. I let the silence linger for a few more seconds, admiring the look. It was one of the cutest expressions I'd ever seen.

With effort, I continued. "You were very nice," I declared. "And I'm grateful for that. Being new wasn't very easy."

His smile grew, the boy sighing in relief. "Good. I thought I made it worse."

"You didn't," I said, shaking my head. "I was just a little overwhelmed with everything. I should have been thanking you."

"For what?"

I smiled at him. "For saving me, of course."

Jacob smirked. "You make me out to be some kind of hero or something."

"After all you did, I don't see why I shouldn't call you one."

"As you wish," he replied, a smug look on his face. I chuckled, earning a grin.

"Besides, I appreciated your company," I admitted, surprised at my honesty. I was just so comfortable with him that I couldn't help myself. I wanted to tell him everything, how I felt with and without him. "I know I didn't show it well last week. It was weird not having you around."

"Your friends would disagree," Jacob insisted. "That's not the first time I've disappeared."

"So I've heard. How long were you gone last time?"

Jacob didn't speak, staring across the lot. His hands were clasped tightly, his knee bounced, and his jaw tightened. "A while," he finally answered. "I checked in every once in a while. I was too busy for school."

"Doing what?" I asked softly.

There was another long pause. "…It's complicated."

My promise to Quil and Embry came to me, and I held my tongue. Clearly this involved the girl from Forks, but I wouldn't mention it; Jacob didn't look like he wanted to talk about it.

The silence lingered between the two of us, and I let my gaze rest on the sky. It wasn't overcast for once. Instead, the sky was clear, sunny. It was a nice change, but so was the day itself. The person I missed now sat beside me, though he had yet to find out just how much I yearned for him. Maybe, for now, it was better that way.

"You looked beautiful at the party the other night."

I stiffened, staring at him in alarm. He only stared at the sky. "Y-you were there?"

A small smile pulled at his lips. "I saw you."

"W-well, why didn't you come say hi?" I sputtered.

Jacob turned his head and flashed a brilliant smile my way, which convinced my lungs to stop working. "You know, I haven't seen anyone have as much fun playing in the water as you. Kid at heart?"

My blush worsened. "I didn't have a beach back home. I couldn't help myself."

"Impulse then," Jacob assumed, looking back to the sky. "Been there."

I gazed at a single cloud, although my thoughts were somewhere else entirely. Jacob called me beautiful? The roles should have been switched; he was much more beautiful than I was, even for a guy. Nobody had ever complimented me in such a way. The fact that it was Jacob who said it for the first time had me at a loss for words. I feared my sanity would go next.

His effect on me was strong, but it was special too.

Jacob was staring at me again when I looked over. He didn't seem to be aware of it, which was odd; he seemed like the type to watch his every move. He was concentrating, but on what?

"…Jacob?"

He blinked a few times, coming out of his reverie. "Hm?"

"Are you okay?" I asked, leaning forward slightly.

"Uh…yeah, I'm fine." His minty breath fanned my face, his eyes in line with mine. "Why?"

"You were just looking at me funny," I explained. "I didn't know if I said something wrong to upset you." The thought of hurting this kid again was horrifying.

He shook his head quickly. "No, it's not that."

"Then what?"

"Don't worry about it."

I closed my eyes, remembering the day he spoke those same words when I thought he was sick. "You said that last time."

"Sarah."

"Were you sick?" I asked, staring at my lap. I knew he wasn't, but I needed to see if my suspicions were correct; that he left because of me.

Jacob sighed, running a hand through his short hair. "…No. I just had to deal with something."

"Something like me?" Ugh, I didn't even mean to say that. I panicked when his eyes narrowed. "I-I mean, you skipped after I yelled at you. I just thought—"

He gave me a look, silencing me. "Don't go there."

Dumbfounded, I blinked, trying to sort this out. "So…I wasn't—"

"Hey." His warm hand covered mine, my body stiffening on the spot. His eyes peered into mine as he closed the distance, his face much closer than before. "Stop," he said softly, firmly.

My heart skipped when Jacob's fingers wrapped around mine in a tighter hold, gently squeezing my hand. The close proximity was enough to make me breathless, but I couldn't force myself to pull away.

I looked down at my lap, his large hand swallowing mine. Jacob was staring at the same sight. While I was going crazy over the physical contact, I also recognized a lack of withdrawal on his side. What did that mean?

"A lot's happened lately. I don't want you to blame yourself for anything," Jacob assured me, voice low. While I looked up, his gaze lingered on our hands.

"But…I hurt you," I confessed.

His brow furrowed slightly as he stared at me, silence surrounding us. I understood what he couldn't say, biting my lip and slowly rising to my feet. Jacob didn't release my hand, but his hold did loosen.

I faced him once I was standing, witnessing his returning gaze. His eyes pierced mine with a sense of knowledge I didn't understand, as if he could read me and see what I was hiding. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, I shook my head.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. I treated him so poorly, even when he was kind to me. "I didn't mean to, I really didn't. I just… I didn't want—"

He was out of it seat before I could continue. I stared at the blue fabric now pressed against my cheek. Strong arms held me to a chiseled chest, while my smaller arms hung limply at my sides. Heat and the scent of pine invaded my senses, overwhelming me to the point where I could only stand in the cage wrapped around me.

"I told you," Jacob whispered softly. "Don't go there." His breath brushed over my ear, eliciting a small tremble from me. His hold tightened, bringing me closer. "Believe me, just this once."

Chills ran down my spine despite the warmth surrounding me. Jacob's arms were tight around my back, his hands holding my sides because I was so small. His embrace was gentle yet secure, comforting, welcoming.

I exhaled quietly, the gentle beat of his heart relaxing me. Hesitantly, I lifted my arms, lightly wrapping them around his back. My heart encouraged me to hold him more, tighter, but this amount of contact was overpowering enough.

In that moment, things were okay again. It felt like the past few days never really happened. Jacob's hold suppressed any negative emotions and filled my heart with light and warmth, like he was my sun.

I let my gaze settle on the shrubbery, the breeze gently swaying some of the leaves. My bangs came in my eyes slightly, obstructing my vision, but I didn't have to see to know Jacob and I were forming a bond; I could feel its strength, ever increasing, and it would never fall.

"By the way," Jacob started, his smooth voice catching my breath, "apology accepted."

"…Likewise," I replied, my voice just as gentle. My heart jumped when his hold tightened, pressing me even closer to his chest. Naturally, I embraced him more as well. Jacob's cheek rested against my hair, but after a moment he set his chin atop my head.

"This is nice," he murmured with a sigh.

The comment was unexpected, but who could disagree? This was the purest moment I had ever experienced with another guy, and because it was Jacob, it was that much more special. I craved a peaceful moment for so long, and now that I had it, I didn't want to let it go. I closed my eyes, taking in the familiar warmth of my friend.

"Friend" didn't describe our relationship well enough. We shared a bond much stronger than that.

I recalled my conversation on the beach with my friends. They were right; I was undeniably falling for Jacob. How couldn't I? Our position only encouraged romantic feelings, and our interactions were so effortless. He was a guy who accepted me, comforted me, protected me, and he made me happy.

I felt so secure and taken care of. Nobody had ever affected me so heavily, not even my father.

Jacob's hand moved a little on my shoulder, the soft touch bringing me out of my reverie. I lifted my gaze and tried to see what he was doing or what he was thinking. Did he sense the same peace I did?

I gently slid my hands across his back. He breathed a low sigh of comfort, which instantly made me giddy. Regretfully, I started to pull away. Hopefully I wouldn't miss this kind of touch for too long.

Jacob retreated, and I kept my eyes downcast, shy and a little embarrassed. How did we look to any passersby? Perhaps we appeared to be a couple. The thought was oddly stimulating.

Jacob donned a stunning smile upon making eye contact. My breath caught in my throat. My body tensed. And he called me beautiful.

His hand lingered on my shoulder. "To think, I actually stayed away and missed this," Jacob declared, chuckling lowly. I bit my lip, glancing to the side.

"My bad," I grimaced. He glared at me in disapproval, but the look vanished when my stomach growled. I put my hands over it, my eyes widening.

"Hungry?"

"Apparently," I confessed with an embarrassed smile.

His teeth shone bright against his tan skin. "Fine, let's go. Might as well feed you while lunch is still going on," he said, then ruffling my hair. He smirked when I gasped, starting to walk back as I desperately tried to fix my mess of hair. "Besides, I'm starving."

I huffed, chasing after him. His long strides made it difficult to keep up, but as we traveled through the halls he eventually noticed, walking at a slower pace. A comfortable silence hung around us, the only sounds being our footsteps. Eventually, as we turned a corner, I found the courage to say something that had been on my mind since we came back inside.

"Hey, Jacob?"

"Hm?"

"I have a proposition for you."

"Oh?" he asked with a grin. "What would that be?"

"How about I make it up to you, for what happened," I said.

He rolled his eyes. "Sarah, I already told you not to—"

"Just hear me out, okay?" I begged. He sighed, and I took that as my cue. "Finals are next week, and I know that you've missed a lot of school. I was thinking that maybe…I could tutor you?"

Jacob stopped. "Tutoring? Are you sure? I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if you backed out."

"Why would I do that?"

He gave me a look. "Think about it, Sarah. Everyone's surprised when I actually attend school. What does that tell you?"

"That you should come to class more often. Maybe then you wouldn't be so hung up on their opinions."

His brown eyes widened for a fraction of a second. "What?" He shook his head a little. "You think these people actually matter to me?"

The way he worded it struck a nerve. Wasn't I one of "these people"? Shrugging, I replied, "Why else would you care if they were surprised to see you?"

"It was just an expression," Jacob explained. "What I meant was that I've missed too much school, enough that you probably can't even help me. Besides, I don't wanna hold you back."

"Jacob," I started, taking a small step toward him. His eyes seemed to soften when I closed the distance, as if he appreciated the proximity. "I wouldn't have volunteered if I didn't think I could handle it. It's fine, really. Embry and Quil can come too. I owe it to them."

"Why?"

"They skipped when you did," I said.

Jacob smirked, leaning forward slightly. "So you're willing to risk your grades, and your sanity, to help us?"

I laughed softly. "Maybe."

His fresh breath brushed my face as he too chuckled. "If you insist. Don't say I didn't warn you."

I started to walk. "Oh c'mon, it won't be that bad. Especially for my first time."

"Wait," Jacob said, catching up to me easily. "You've never tutored?" He shook his head, laughing out loud. "Oh, this is bound to be interesting."

I gave him a look, and he only laughed louder as we entered the cafeteria. Almost everyone noticed us together, but I continued smiling softly anyway. Not even their looks could throw off the wave of happiness washing over me.

A/N: Revisionnnnn.

Reviews are encouraged, as always!