Disclaimer: These characters belong to the creators of Glee, I own nothing. If I did, Faberry would most definitely be a couple.

Authors Note: Thank you for all the reviews and story alerts, I really appreciate them :) So a couple of people didn't like the Beth aspect which I totally understand and thank you for reviewing to tell me. I did go back and forth over the idea but I think, for the Quinn I created, it was necessary but I respect everybody's opinion and I'm glad you told me. However, there will just be a conversation about Beth; she won't appear. Hope you all enjoy and as usual, all mistakes are mine.

Chapter 11:

The look on her face isn't what I expected. Actually, that's not entirely true because I don't know what I expected her reaction to be but I don't think it was this. I didn't expect her to just stare at me, expressionless. Her face doesn't show anything, not anger, not confusion, not sadness, it's just blank. Yet somehow that's worse than if her face showed an expression because then at least I could understand how she felt.

Right now, I can't even guess at how she is feeling.

And that scares me.

Rachel is not a closed book. Either she tells you how she's feeling or you can guess by her facial expressions, so not knowing how she is feeling is a frightening concept.

"Rachel, please say something." She looks at me but doesn't speak. "Anything."

Her eyebrows furrow and I accept that she isn't going to say anything until she's processed what I've just said. She knew I had more things to tell her but I don't think she ever expected me to tell her that I had a daughter. Her mouth opens and closes several times of its own accord but she doesn't form any words. The longer this silence lasts, the more nervous I become. Sure she stayed with me after what I told her this morning but finding out I have a daughter, that's a bit different. That could push her over the edge. That thought alone makes me want to be sick. I exhale heavily and her eyes find mine. I have to look away at the piercing look she is giving me, like she's trying to get answers to her questions from me but without having to ask them. I cross my arms as a natural reaction, guarding myself for the onslaught of questions that Rachel will undoubtedly ask, preparing myself for the worst.

"You're just full of surprises aren't you?"

That was not the first thing I expected her to say but the tone she used, a tone filled with disbelief and anger, now that I expected.

"You have a daughter?"

"Yeah."

"You have a daughter." This time it isn't a question, she's saying it to herself, processing it. "A daughter."

"No matter how many times you say it, the answer is still going to be the same."

"I know that Quinn, I just…I can't seem to get my head around this," she replies. She starts pacing slowly and my eyes follow her every move. "You know, I've been thinking about what else you had to tell me but having a daughter was not one of my thoughts. The way you kept saying that I might look at you differently, it made me think that you were going to tell me you're a convicted criminal or something."

"Well I'm not a convicted criminal if that makes this any better," I try to lighten the mood but neither of us cracks a smile.

"How old is she?"

It's almost natural now, the smile which appears on my face every time I think of my daughter. At first, I didn't let myself think about her because thinking about her, thinking about how I gave her up hurt too much. Gradually over time, thinking about her started to make me happy because I had given her a better life, a life that I couldn't give her. A life with decent parents who she could depend on. Those thoughts gave me comfort and that is why now when I think of her, I can smile.

"She'll be eleven next month."

Telling her my daughter's age seems to snap her out of whatever stupor she was in and her eyes narrow at me. "I understand that what you told me about your parents is something that you don't tell somebody on the first date but fuck Quinn, you should…" She emphasises strongly on the word should and it makes me feel guilty. "You should have told me you had a daughter, I mean that's pretty important information Quinn. She could have walked into your apartment at any time whilst I was there."

"That would be quite hard," I state quietly but Rachel doesn't hear.

"Is the reason I've never seen her at your apartment because you only had me round when she wasn't in?"

"I never invited you round Rachel; you just came when you felt like it. How would I have been able to time you coming round and my daughter not being in?" I question but she doesn't seem to realise what I'm trying to say. "Rachel, the reason you've never seen her is…"

Rachel stops pacing suddenly and her hand comes up to her mouth and she stares at me sorrowfully. "Did she die?"

"What? No, she's alive and well," I quickly quash her theory and Rachel brings her hand away from her mouth. "I know you must be feeling so many things right now but can I just explain before you get the wrong end of the stick again. Once you have the whole picture, feel free to shout at me, hit me, whatever you need to do."

"I would never hit you," Rachel replies softly and in spite of the tense situation, I smile.

"It would be impossible for her to walk into my apartment considering I gave her up for adoption. That's why you've never seen her when you've come over." I run my fingers through my hair nervously, as Rachel stares at me.

"You gave her up?" I nod my head at her question, fully expecting her to repeat the statement several times like she did with 'you have a daughter.' "I feel terrible for assuming that you were hiding her from me and then suggesting that she was dead."

"You have no need to feel terrible, you weren't to know."

"But I should have asked rather than jumping down your throat like that," she says, pinching the bridge of her nose. She's a lot calmer now than she was a few minutes ago. "I'm sorry; it's just a lot to take in."

"I know."

"You're a mom," she states and she's smiling.

I shake my head fervently. "No, I may have given birth to her but I'm not her mom."

"Of course you are Quinn; you will always be her mom, even if you want to say that you're not." She takes a couple of steps closer to me but stops at the bed. "If she's eleven next month you must have had her when you were in high school."

"My rough high school experience wouldn't be complete unless I had a teenage pregnancy to deal with."

"Don't joke about this Quinn, please just be serious for the moment."

"Sorry."

"You told me that you came out to your parents as gay during high school though so why did you sleep with a guy? If you'd accepted you were gay, why would you do that?"

"I was already pregnant when everything happened with my parents I just didn't know it yet. I didn't find out until after my parents kicked me out and I was staying with Rory and his family."

"Who was the father?"

Unlike this morning when I wanted to have control of the conversation, I want Rachel to lead this conversation because that way I know what she wants to hear. This morning, she wanted to hear what I had to say and she let me tell her whatever I felt comfortable with but now I'll tell her whatever she wants to know.

"One of the guys on the football team, Adam," I tell her and she patiently waits for me to expand on that little nugget of information. "I slept with him a couple of times when my mom had cancer and when I moved in with Rory, I found out I was three months pregnant. He was actually great about it, I expected him to make me deal with it alone but he said he'd be there for me every step of the way. I told him straight away that I didn't want to keep her and he said that if that was what I wanted, he'd support me." I walk closer to Rachel and take a seat on the foot of the bed. "I think deep down he wanted to keep her but he never told me that. He was with me at the birth and I will always be grateful for that."

"Did you not want to keep her?"

"I told you this morning that I couldn't be dependent on somebody, that I couldn't look after somebody; do you really think that I'm capable of looking after a child?" I ask but Rachel doesn't answer me, she knows that I'm not looking for an answer. "I always knew that I would give her up. I mean my parents had disowned me, I was a mess, and I couldn't bring a baby into the mess that was my life. It wouldn't have been fair." I pause to take a deep breath.

"You can do anything if you put your mind to it," Rachel says as she sits beside me.

"Maybe that's true but I didn't think about raising a child, I didn't set my mind to that way of thinking," I explain. "I wanted my daughter to have the best life possible and that wasn't with me."

"Would it have made a difference?"

"Would what have made a difference?"

"If Adam had told you that he wanted to keep Beth, would you have kept her?"

I hesitate before answering, unsure whether the answer I have is the one Rachel wants to hear. "No, it wouldn't have made a difference. Maybe if we were both older but at the time, I was giving her up for adoption no matter what." Rachel averts her gaze from mine and looks down. "You were hoping I'd say yes."

"I wasn't hoping you'd say anything Quinn, I was just asking a question."

"If you had a teen pregnancy would you keep the baby?"

"I don't think I can really answer that," she answers. "I don't think anybody can unless they're in the situation."

"Hypothetically?"

Rachel swallows before answering. "Hypothetically, I'd like to say I'd keep the baby."

"Do you think I'm a bad person because I never once thought about keeping her?"

Rachel pulls me into her and I bury my head in the crook of her neck. "No, I don't Quinn. How can you be a bad person for doing what you thought was the best for you daughter?"

"What if it wasn't the best for her?"

"Do you think it was?"

I nod into her neck and Rachel pulls back, placing her hands on either side of my face. "Then you've just answered your own question." She kisses me and my stomach jumps. This is our first proper kiss that means something, it isn't just a peck and it isn't just foreplay, it's real.

I've been thinking about this for a while now, how our first proper kiss would go. I pictured it being romantic and that it would happen after what would be our first real date and sometimes fantasy doesn't live up to reality.

But this time, the reality surpassed my fantasy.

Rachel breaks the kiss and rests her forehead against mine. She stares at me intensely but unlike earlier, I don't look away. I can't. I lose myself in the brown pools of her eyes and I feel comfort, I feel safe.

"You were going to give the teddy bear to Beth."

It's comes out of nowhere but it's not a question.

I nod against her forehead. "I thought it would be nice if she could have something from me. I saw it in a shop window two months after I found out I was pregnant. I wanted to give it to her adoptive parents so she could have something to remember me by," I explain. "But when the time came, I couldn't give them the bear because I had spent the last few months telling myself that this would be Beth's teddy so it's stupid but I couldn't part with it because in my mind it was the only thing I had of my daughter, even though she never had it. It was meant to remind her of me but every time I look at it, it reminds me of her. Not that I need a memory of her but…"

"I know what you mean," Rachel says. "Do you know where she is?"

I shake my head at her question. "I had her in Florida so she might still be there but I don't know." I look away from her. "It was a closed adoption, she can find me when she's eighteen if she wants but I can't seek her out."

"Do you want to?" I shake my head once more. "Why not?"

"I don't want her to be disappointed in me like I was in my parents."

"You're not your parents Quinn and you don't know that Beth will be disappointed in you." Rachel brushes some of my bangs out of my face. "Don't think like that."

"I guess if I do find out, it won't be for another seven years," I reply, pulling away from Rachel and standing up. "We should really head downstairs, I've already made us late."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," she replies, mimicking my actions and standing up. "I'm glad you told me."

"So am I." I grab her hand and tether our fingers together. "I've told you everything about me, no more secrets Rach."

"And I'm still here." Rachel stands a little on her tip-toes and kisses me briefly before walking to the door and opening it, tugging me along gently. "I told you I wasn't going anywhere. You're stuck with me."

"I like the sound of that," I whisper the words but I could have shouted them because Rachel heard me regardless of the volume of my voice.

"Me too."

"Now that Rachel and Quinn have decided to join us, what does everybody want to drink? We've got pretty much everything," Kurt asks as he peruses his liquor cabinet, pulling out several bottles and studying them, placing some back into the cabinet and some on top of it.

"I'm going to stick to orange juice," Rachel says walking to the fridge.

I follow her dotingly. "Why don't you have a proper drink, let loose a bit?" I look to the side in thought for a second. "Come to think of it, I've never actually seen you drink, do you drink? You're not teetotal are you? A recovering alcoholic?"

She pours herself a glass of orange juice. "None of the above," she replies. "I hosted a party in high school which was my first time experiencing alcohol and I realised that I liked it. The next day we had a Glee performance and to calm people's nerves, I gave everybody a concoction of my own creation. During the song Brittany threw on me and I have to admit that being thrown up on kind of ruins alcohol for a person. I haven't really drunk since but I'm not teetotal because I'm open to drinking, I just choose not to most of the time. I do have the odd glass of champagne at celebrations," she says taking a sip of her drink. "Even when you offered in the bar I only had lemonade."

I allow my mind to go back to the first time we met and she's right. I offered her an alcoholic drink but she had stuck with lemonade.

"That's a shame because I think you'd make an adorable drunk." I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "If you were to drink, and that's only if, I'd look after you and make sure nobody threw up on you. I'll make sure Brittany gives you a wide berth too."

She laughs softly. "Quinn Fabray, are you pressurising me?" She replies lightly and I can tell she's not serious.

I wrap my arms around her waist and she stumbles forward ever so slightly. "Don't be ridiculous, I would never want to pressure you in to doing anything," I say seriously, making sure she knows that, even though I know her question was asked in a playful manner. "I just want to see what a drunken Rachel Berry looks like and in case you're wondering, yes, I do have an ulterior motive."

"What's that?" She asks, intrigued.

I bring my mouth close to her ear and whisper the words. "Drunken sex is amazing and I think that drunken sex with you will be mind blowing." I tug her earlobe between my teeth before releasing it and she hums in content.

She swallows nervously before patting me on both shoulders, silently telling me to release my hold on her. I oblige and she hands me her orange juice. "Well in that case, I'll just have the one." I beam at her and give her a chaste kiss on her lips. I'm about to head over to Kurt to change Rachel's orange juice into vodka and orange juice when she speaks again. "Just so you know, for future reference, you can't always use sex as a way to get want you want."

I lean closer to her, my mouth inches away from hers. "I beg to differ," I reply playfully before placing a kiss on her forehead.

"I have an announcement to make," Brittany shouts over the music. Her body is swaying to the music whilst Santana admires her girlfriend from her seat on the floor. Brittany comes to a stop in front of her girlfriend and holds out her hands for Santana to take. Brittany pulls her up and remains surprisingly steady even though the Latina crashes into her. "This morning, Santana proposed to me!"

The living room goes silent as Kurt switches the music off. "You two are getting married!" He squeals with excitement, almost spilling his drink in the process. "That is fantastic, I was wondering how long it would take for Satan to pop the question."

I'm surprised that Santana doesn't react to his nickname for her. But when I look at her, she hasn't removed her eyes from Brittany's. I'm not even sure she heard what Kurt said. Brittany kisses her passionately and immediately I feel like I'm intruding on a personal moment. I look away but nobody else seems bothered and I gather that they are used to their public displays of affection. A round of applause and cheers fill the living room before Brittany requests that the music is turned back on so she and Santana can dance. Kurt obliges and Brittany shrieks before wrapping her arms around Santana and slowly dancing with her.

"Told you it would be their wedding next," Rachel says louder than I would like into my ear, slurring her words ever so slightly. "I know everything."

I laugh at how drunk she is. She didn't stick to her 'I'll just have the one' and kept asking me if I could get her another drink. Although she's only had a few, clearly not properly drinking for years has made her body less tolerant to the effects of alcohol. Or maybe she was always a light weight. I take a sip of my own drink, jack and coke, my personal favourite. I can feel the effects of it on my own body but unlike Rachel, I can handle my drink so if anything, I'm only slightly tipsy. "I guess you do."

"Tell me you'll come to their wedding with me."

I wrap my arm securely around her waist preventing her from swaying on the spot. "Just tell me when and I'm there," I reply, placing a kiss on her temple. She sighs in content and snuggles into my side.

Santana lands on the flood beside us with a thud, a giggling Brittany by her side. They're engaging in a strange conversation which doesn't seem to involve many words but every so often, one of them will laugh at the other. Brittany kisses her fiancée before being dragged away by Kurt, Mercedes and Tina. I feel Rachel move away from me as she stands to follow the quartet.

"Congratulations," I say as Santana downs her drink.

She gives me a small smile. "Thanks." She leaves my side to get another drink before returning. "I've never seem her so happy. I should have proposed years ago."

"How did you do it?"

Santana ducks her head momentarily. "I just asked her this morning after sex," she says quietly and I remember how Brittany had whispered something into Santana's ear this morning before Santana replied saying not now. Had it been this? Did Brittany want to tell Rachel and me this morning? "I was just thinking about our conversation last night and it just came out. It's not how I planned it or anything but she didn't seem to mind. She said yes before I even finished asking the question."

"What about our conversation last night?"

She shrugs her shoulders lightly. "Just seeing you so wound up because of your feelings for Berry, seeing how much you cared for her, how much you loved her. It made me realise that I love Brittany and I want to spend the rest of my life with her so why wait? Why not propose to her?"

"Glad I could be of assistance."

"You proposed to her in bed!" Rachel falls into my lap with a giggle. "In bed, that is so you Santana."

Mercedes shouts her approval of the proposal from the other side of the room whilst Tina retells Kurt about Mike proposed to her. Surprisingly Santana doesn't seem to mind. "I don't do the whole romantic gesture thing and everybody knows that." She turns to look at Rachel who is making herself comfortable in my lap. "How did you manage to get Berry drunk? I tried constantly through high school but she always said no, I'm not being thrown up on again."

"She promised me sex," Rachel shouts and everybody eyes fall to Rachel and me before they return to their conversations. My cheeks fill with a pink tint but Rachel is oblivious to the fact that everybody just heard her. "You're cute when you blush."

Santana bursts out laughing at Rachel's declaration before Brittany calls her over. She stands up and casts a final glance at me and Rachel. "The more time I spend with you, the more I like you Quinn."

Rachel turns to look at me and kisses me on the lips. "She likes you!" Rachel exclaims. "Do you want to know a secret?"

"Always," I reply warmly, enjoying the closeness we are sharing and how natural it is.

"I like you too."

"I don't think that's a secret Rachel, I knew that you liked me."

She shakes her head furiously. "No, you don't understand how much I like you; I really, really like you Quinn."

"I really like you too but you are very drunk."

"It's your fault," she says as she smacks me in the shoulder gently.

"I do apologise," I pout lovingly at her.

"You're forgiven." She takes my bottom lip between her teeth before releasing it. "I'm going to go sing," she tells me before leaving my lap and heading over to the karaoke machine. Seconds later the song 'Don't You Want Me Baby' plays throughout the room and Rachel starts singing, beckoning Kurt to join her.

"She sang this during Glee Club with Blaine," Brittany says as she sits beside me.

"She's an amazing singer," I reply. Brittany nods in agreement. "Congratulations on the engagement."

Brittany beams at me. "I was wondering when she'd get around to proposing, I always knew that she would and that she wanted to be the one who proposed so I waited until she was ready and it feels so good to call her my fiancée." Brittany watches as Santana dances in a drunken fashion with Mercedes and Tina. "Are you going to ask Rachel to marry you?"

I choke a little on my drink. "It's much too early to be thinking about that."

"Why?" Brittany asks. "When you know you know, isn't that what Rachel said about you the other day?" Rachel had said that but I had thought that she was lying to make our relationship seem more real and romantic. When I look at her, I can imagine her being my wife and I've never done that before. Maybe she's right, maybe when you know you know. "I knew that Santana would be the person I married when we first met. It just took us a while to get there."

"I think it will take us a while to get there too," I tell her and she doesn't probe any further. "I'm going to drag Rachel away from the microphone before she stays up there all night and I don't get to spend time with her."

"That's a good idea because I want to sing with San and Rachel always steals the microphone from us."

I smile at the blonde before walking towards Rachel. "Dance with me?" I ask, interrupting Rachel mid song.

She glares at me briefly for interrupting her before her glare is replaced with a drunken smile and she takes my hand and steps away from the microphone. Brittany immediately grabs her girlfriend's hand and runs towards the now free microphone. Santana follows her, slightly dazed at the sudden movement.

Rachel places her arms around my neck and I wrap mine around her waist. "Do you want to get married?"

"Is that a proposal?"

My breath hitches for a second. "No…I meant in general…like in the future…"

"Take a breath Quinn, I was joking," she says. "Yeah."

"Thanks for that insightful answer," I joke.

"It's a yes or no question Quinn," she replies, raising her eyebrow at me. "I answered yes."

"Do you want to be with me?"

"Yeah."

I sigh quietly. "Can you give me a bit more than that?"

Rachel brings her gaze to meet mine, her eyes slowly closing and opening. "I want to be your girlfriend." She smiles lazily at me. "Properly though, not pretend."

Rachel stumbles a little in my arms and I tighten my hold on her. We're not really dancing; I don't think we ever really were. I'm just holding her and we're swaying a little from side to side whilst Kurt, Mercedes and Tina dance around us. "Does that mean you're my girlfriend?"

Rachel shakes her head. "You have to ask me properly," she says quietly so that nobody can hear. "But wait until I'm sober because I'm seeing two of you and I don't know which one of you is the real Quinn."

"Are you okay?"

"I think I'm drunk," she slurs, tugging her bottom lip between her teeth. "Are you drunk?"

I can't help but laugh at her. I was right, she is an adorable drunk. "No I'm not drunk; I needed to be alert because I wanted to make sure nobody threw up on you."

"I think you have a problem then," she whispers. "Because I might throw up on myself."

"You won't, I'll look after you," I kiss her forehead and she drops her arms from my neck so she can tether our fingers together.

"Thank you Quinn."

Rachel's hands run up and down my back impatiently, tugging at the bottom of my top. "Take this off."

Rachel and I had left the bachelor party about fifteen minutes ago because Rachel couldn't keep her eyes open for much longer. Trying to get her upstairs when she was drunk and half asleep proved to be a lot more difficult than I ever imagined. It didn't help that she kept trying to lie down on the stairs to go to sleep.

I take her hands in mine before placing them by her side. "Please stay still Rachel," I plead as I try to remove her makeup with a cleansing wipe. She obliges and I throw the wipe into the trash can when I'm finished. "I think you need to go to bed baby."

"But you promised me drunken sex," she pouts.

"I know I did but you're too drunk right now, I don't want to take advantage of you." I step behind her and unzip her dress, allowing her to remove it. She pulls the dress down before stepping out of it so she's just in her underwear and turns to face me.

"You wouldn't be taking advantage, I want this," she says adamantly as her eyes slowly close before she snaps them open.

"Even if that's true, you can barely keep your eyes open. Lie down and go to sleep."

She pouts at me and looks like she's about to argue some more but shrugs her shoulders. "Stay with me," she says quietly. "In the bed not over there." She points aimlessly towards the left of the room, trying to point at the couch.

"I will," I tell her. "Do you want your pyjamas? She shakes her head and climbs into bed. "I'll just get changed and then I'll come to bed." She mumbles something incoherently before closing her eyes.

I chuckle softly at her before disappearing into the bathroom to get ready for bed. I can hear her moving about in the bed, trying to get comfortable before silence falls. I brush my teeth quickly before ridding myself of my makeup and removing my clothes so I'm just in my underwear as well. When I come back into the room, she's fast asleep and snoring quietly. I can't help the smile which appears at the sight of her. I climb into bed beside her and wrap my arm around her waist pulling her closer to me. She sighs contently at my actions and I smile into the back of her neck.

"That feels good." Her voice is quiet and filled with sleep.

"Go back to sleep babe."

She murmurs something in response but after several minutes her breathing levels out and I can tell that she's fallen back asleep. In the past, this would have sc ared the hell out of me, being this close to somebody but with Rachel, it just feels right.

"Rachel?" I whisper her name to check that she is asleep and when she doesn't reply, I get my answer. "I love you."

I release a sigh of relief as I voice my feelings out loud for the first time. I know she didn't hear them but it's a step in the right direction. I close my eyes and wait for sleep to come.

Unsurprisingly, with Rachel in my arms, I fall asleep straight away.