The Ball
'Whatever you do, Christie, do not swear, make rude gestures, or produce any bodily functions.' Hillary said rolling out a red carpet at the front of the mansion. 'These people are important and I want people to think that Lara only hosts good company.'
Christie laughed. 'Look dude, I am good company! I saved your asses last week.'
Hillary curtly walked over to her. She stood, leaning on the wall chewing bright pink gum. 'Christie, we know you're good company, but they don't. If they saw you acting like this then they'd think that Miss Croft welcomes anyone into her home.'
'Well she invited me in. She didn't know who I was. Ha! Hillary, I got you there.' She threw a wink at Hillary who sighed, smiled and shook his head. 'Go and help your very trustworthy cousin to pick an outfit. She can never expect to wear her riding trousers to meet the Duchess.'
Christie walked into the mansion and strode up the massive staircase, missing a step every time. She ran into Lara's bedroom to see her beating the life out of an innocent punch bag. 'Lara, Hillary said to come and help you.'
Lara stopped and wiped the beads of sweat from her forehead. She took aim out of the open window and spat forcefully. Christie laughed as she knew that Lara was nowhere near as sophisticated as she made out. She could relate to her as the down to earth heroine who has inherited a hell of a lot of money.
'CHRISTIE!' Hillary's voice bellowed out from below the window. 'What did I tell you?'
Both Lara and Christie leant over the window sill and saw Hillary wiping the top of his head with a beaded handkerchief.
'Sorry Hilly that was me.' Lara said trying her hardest not laugh as her butler placed the spit covered tissue in the bin.
The night came fast, it was already seven o clock and guests where arriving by the dozen. The gym had been successfully converted into a giant ballroom and Lara's kitchen was bustling with cooks that had been hired for the day.
Hillary glided through the collection of people, holding two trays harbouring glasses of champagne. He had assistants in the form of Bryce (comically wearing a tuxedo) and Hillary's brother, James, who didn't resemble Hillary at all. He had a blonde ponytail that had been gelled back and slickly positioned. He was taller and slimmer, but had the same air of grace about him as his brother.
Lara waited to introduce herself as the hostess once everyone had arrived and Christie decided to wait with her. They both wore identically shaped dresses that flattered their figures, only Christie's was black and Lara's was white. They both sat in front of a mirror and waited for Bryce's call to tell them that everyone had arrived.
Lara had allowed her hair some freedom as she hadn't tied it up. 'Einar hasn't been in touch.'
Christie ran her fingers through her newly un-matted hair. The absence of her dreadlocks annoyed her. 'Hasn't he? Perhaps he's just waiting until we go back next month. I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.'
Lara looked at her. 'Your hair looks really greasy.'
Christie coughed. 'Excuse me! I had to douse my hair in conditioner to get me dreadlocks out!'
Lara looked at her hair and frowned. 'Well they're out now, go and wash it.'
'Well if it bothers you so much I will!' Christie said thumping Lara on the arm playfully.
An hour passed and still not everyone had arrived. Hillary had made the decision to call Lara despite having three short of the hundred and forty people.
Lara and Christie linked arms and walked down the stairs. They entered the ballroom and stood up on the large platform situated at the front. The classical calm music ceased as Lara stepped up to the microphone. 'Ladies and Gentlemen…' She began addressing the large crowd of well dressed aristocrats. She looked down and saw six young children sat with their arms folded. '…boys and girls...' She continued professionally. 'I am delighted to welcome you all to my humble abode. Please, take full advantage of our 'pleased to serve you' staff and make use of all the facilities. I insist that you all have a wonderfully exciting and enjoyable evening and that you may all leave feeling a little (if not) very merry.' The crowd laughed heartily before falling silent again. 'Before we resume the party, I would like to introduce my younger cousin, Miss Christie Montieno.'
'Thank you!' Christie shouted down the microphone. She grimaced as the sound bounced off the walls before nearly deafening all the guests.
Lara curtly bowed her head and stepped down from the platform.
'You've been practising that old chestnut.' Christie said as they both took it in turns to shake hands and kiss the guests on the cheek.
'You bet.' Lara said winking at Christie and greeting an elderly gentleman with a light kiss.
Christie took it upon herself to mingle in the crowd, greeting everyone with a wave of the hand and a friendly 'Hey' and 'Hi there'. She was tapped rather heavily on the shoulder. She turned around half expecting to see someone waiting to hit her.
'Excuse me Miss, do you think that I resemble a Pineapple?' A broad middle aged woman asked.
Christie was taken aback. She looked her up and down and smiled. Inwardly she laughed hysterically at the sight of a large woman dressed head to toe in yellow, with a bright green scarf weaved into her platinum blonde bun. She looked EXACTLY like a Pineapple. 'God no! Who on earth would say that? You look lovely.' She smiled warmly and nodded.
'Oh dear, why thank you. My husband, the one with the black suit over there said I looked rather like a fruit. I naturally asked which and he said Pineapple.' She pointed jollily at the man stood with Hillary showing him his golden watch.
'Well you don't, you look great.' Christie lied. 'I'm just going for a beer.'
She cursed herself as she walked over to the table of alcohol. There was no beer, just expensive champagne, wine, whisky and other 'posh stuff' as Christie would call it.
Lara walked over to her and linked her arm. 'I see Lady Smith is as colourful as she was last year. Last time I held a party, she came dressed like a kiwi. She seems to like dressing in anything tropical.'
'Just as long as she doesn't come as a tropical dancer…' Christie said shuddering at the thought of Lady Smith thrusting her body into various moves. 'When does this party get started then?'
Lara sighed. 'Sadly this is it. It rarely gets more exciting than this.' She and her cousin looked around only to see geriatric 'toff-nosed' men and women holding their heads high and boasting about their latest fur lined jacket. The few younger, better looking guests were just as bad…they gloated over being able to play piano at the highest grade. Not one of them seemed to lack in talent, yet none of them (coincidently) were able to prove it.
'So, this is all we're getting? Classical music? Man, I have nothing against that stuff, but surely we need to get the show on the road?'
Lara agreed. 'Any ideas?'
Christie's eyes widened. 'Give me ten minutes.'
She rushed off and out of the mansion. It was dark, but Lara's beautiful lamps in the grass illuminated the path towards Bryce's cabin. She reached into her pearl handbag and pulled out a set of keys. 'Not that one, that's Hillary's room, not this, ah…perfect.' She held a small silver key in between her fore and middle finger. She unlocked Bryce's door and stepped inside. The place was dimly lit, partly because Bryce wasn't in there to light it up with is computers and game consoles. She sat down on his leather swivel seat and typed in his password. 'Damn he is so predictable.' She then inserted a blank CD into the computer and selected various songs from his playlist. 'Blink 182, Sandstorm, Madonna, JT…' She smiled as she clicked the 'burn' button. She had selected over fifty songs. 'Fifty of the best songs ever al compacted onto one CD, God I love technology!'
When it had finished, she turned it off and gathered many electrical items from his personal stash. She took a black shiny bin bag and filled it with disco balls, smoke/bubble machines, a dry ice machine and plenty of streamers.
'Lady Smith, you look phenomenal!' Lara said smiling at the large lady, who had come over to harass Lara on her opinion of Pineapples. 'He must be joking with you; you don't look at all like a Pineapple!'
By the time Lara had just about finished her rounds of the people there, Christie and Bryce had teamed together to throw the ultimate party. The lights dimmed and the music stopped suddenly. The guests went quiet, some still muttering. A heavy mist billowed out from both sides of the room and covered the floor. The guests were all gasping and looking down at their feet. Some where kicking their legs like as though to shift some of the smoke. A single bright white light fell upon Christie who was stood on the once respected platform, where Lara had addressed her guests formally.
'People of Croft Manor. I would like to introduce to you now, a party that will end all parties. A party that will undoubtedly blow your well educated minds. A party that is going to…' Two lines of smoke were violently emitted upwards on either side of Christie, giving her an image worthy of the Gods. '…KICK ASS!'
Many colours flashed from the two large disco balls sneakily placed on the ceiling and dry ice was puffed out from the centre of the 'dance floor'. Many people stood, they appeared to be waiting for something.
'They need someone to dance first, they're like robots!' Christie shouted over to Lara, who was laughing.
'I take it you mean me?' She said rolling her eyes playfully. She and Christie stood in the middle of the crowd; they all parted and gave them a perfect circle to perform. Christie looked towards Bryce and nodded her head. The song changed quickly and the sound of MC Hammer filled the room. Both Lara and Christie, all dignity set aside, began to shuffle across the circle in perfect sync. Every move they made was mirrored by each other. They looked as though they had choreographed it previously. Slowly, the crowd began to move, the 'Pineapple Lady', as Christie called her was now dancing gleefully to the music and various other aristocrats were merrily moving.
Lara and Christie stopped as the song ended. The crowd didn't seem to notice as they carried on dancing to the next song as though there was no change.
'Well, I must say you know how to work a crowd.' Lara said smiling broadly. 'They usually just stand in their own little groups in order of importance talking about their recent brush with 'poverty''.
'Yeah well, people like that haven't seen poverty until they've visited some parts of L.A.'
Bryce came running over laughing. 'Lara, I haven't seen you move like since…well I've NEVER seen you move like that!'
Lara smiled and tapped Bryce heavily on the back. 'And you never will again.'