Chapter 8: Romeo and Juliet
"When you can fall for chains of silver, you can fall for chains of gold. You can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold. You promised me everything, you promised me thick and thin. Now you just say 'oh Romeo? Yeah you know I used to have a scene with him'" (Romeo and Juliet, Dire Straits)
I woke up when I was hit in the face with a pillow.
"Fuck off," I groaned into the pillow.
"Never," said a familiar voice. I groaned and rolled over, covering my face with the pillow.
"Oi! Man whore!" shouted another familiar voice. I threw the pillow in the direction of Dylan. "What? It's true!" he insisted. I sat up and glared at Al and Dylan, who were standing, grinning, in my bedroom.
"Why are you here this early?" I demanded, even though the sun pouring through my blinds told me it couldn't be that early.
"Hogwarts letters," Al said, waving mine at me. I grabbed it as I heard the laughter from the kitchen.
"Is there a girl here?" I demanded, jumping out of bed.
"You act like that's never happened before," Dylan said.
"Dylan, the only girl who's been in the upstairs of my house besides my mum and grandma is your little sister," I said. The laughter continued. I ran down the hall into the kitchen. Rose was sitting at my kitchen table, laughing, with my father. I was suddenly very conscious of the fact I only sleep in boxers.
"Oh, hey, Scor!" Rose said, jumping up and hugging me. Have I mentioned I hate my life?
"Hey," I said slowly, blinking at my dad. He shrugged and offered me a cup of coffee.
"I made Head Girl," she said. "I'm assuming you made Head Boy," she added.
"I dunno. Haven't looked yet," I said.
"Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy!" Grandma shrieked as she walked into the kitchen. "Have you no shame?" she demanded.
"Er…" I thought about it. "No, not really. Why?"
"In your underwear in front of a girl?" she exclaimed.
"Why's that bad?" Dylan asked. "He's naked in front of them all the time." Al and I hit him upside the head in unison. Rose snickered and Dad looked pained.
"Draco!" Grandma yelled, hitting him upside the head. "You raised your son to be like you!" It was my turn to stare at my dad in shock. He turned pink and hid his face.
"What's going on?" Mum asked walking into the kitchen.
"My mother just called me a whore," Dad muttered.
"And by association called me one as well," I said.
"Yeah, but in your case it's true," Dylan said. He may be my best guy friend, but I'm going to kill him. Al hit him upside the head again. Mum shook her head at us in confusion before hugging Rose. What the hell?
"Hey, Astoria!" Rose said. My ex-girlfriend is friends with my mother? I hate my life.
"Go put some clothes on," Mum recommended. "Then bring your letter back." I nodded, still a little confused and walked back to my room. I opened the door and pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt before returning to the kitchen. I opened my letter, still half asleep. Tiredly I turned it upside down onto the table. Two pieces of metal skittered across the table. The first I grabbed was the badge proclaiming 'Quidditch Captain'. Dad clapped me on the back.
"Any strategies you'd like to share with your opposing captain?" Al asked. I punched him in the arm, still bitter about being woken up. The other badge turned out to be the Head Boy badge. I grinned half heartedly.
"Oh, good!" Rose said. "I'm glad it's you. I'd have hated to share the Head dorms with someone from Slytherin."
"Head dorms?" I asked weakly.
"You get your own room," Dad muttered. "Sorry about the left bedpost." I stared at him in confusion.
"You really did do the whole 'notch in the bedpost' thing?" Mum asked in disgust. Dad looked sheepish and Mum hit him upside the head. He nodded.
"I deserved that," he said.
"Let's go shopping," Dylan suggested.
"Okay," I replied, grabbing my book list and a pair of shoes. The four of us apparated to the entrance of Diagon Alley. "So, it's just going to be you, me and Ioan all year?" I asked Rose. She rolled her eyes at me. The fact that she and Ioan are actually in a relationship is confusing to me, to say the least.
"You missed multiple people," she shot back. I looked confused. "You know, the rest of the girls in our year that you haven't slept with yet." I sneered at her.
"How many hands does it take you to count all the girls you've slept with?" Dylan asked curiously. I'm getting really sick of the man whore jokes.
"One," I said snottily. Let's see… Fiona, Jasmine, Rose obviously, Natalie Porterfield (just to get her to shut up), and those two hot Ravenclaws, Stephanie Briar and Laura Bancroft. Oh shit. Maybe they are right. "And one more finger," I added sheepishly. I am a whore. Fuck.
"So it takes you both hands?" Rose asked, making some sort of insinuation against me.
"What does it take you?" I asked. "Both middle fingers?" Al snickered. Rose hit him.
"Go fuck Dylan," she said waspishly to her cousin.
"I'm game," Dylan said. They really need to get together. Like, really really.
"Well, I would," Al said (thank god he finally admitted to being gay), "except that would necessitate either scaring young children for life or leaving the two of you alone together, which would result in someone's death."
"Oh damn," Dylan said. "And I was looking forward to it, too!"
"Please make out in front of my grandmother," I said. "It might kill her!" I grinned at the thought.
"I was going to worry, but then I remembered it was you," Will said from behind us.
"Thanks, mate," I said.
"Here for you," he said.
"Ioan! Hey, Ioan!" Rose yelled suddenly. My entire dorm turned at Ioan's name and raced through the crowd towards us. I ducked, but it was useless. As one, Grant, Kevin, Sam, and Kent tackled me, while Ioan and Rose proceeded to say 'hello' without any words.
"Can't breathe!" I yelled from my place on the cobblestone street. My dorm mates have never really shown me much affection before, but after last year, they started seeming to like me. They hopped up and Kevin pulled me to my feet while Ioan unglued his face from Rose. Normally, I would hate him, but…
"Bastard!" he exclaimed, excitedly.
"Shmuck!" I replied in the same tone, high fiving him. Rose blinked at us in confusion.
"I'll never understand men," she said to herself. You see, after Ioan found out I 'broke up' with Fiona the two of us got in a fight, at the end of which we realised we had way too much in common to really hate each other, the least of which being the desire to sleep with Rose.
"Never expect to," the lot of us said, making her shake her head.
OOooOOooOOooOO
"Welcome to Quidditch tryouts," I said brightly, smiling at the forty people crowding the pitch around me. First hurdle as captain… I can do this right? Okay… First test. "How many of you are here because you find the wonderful Miss Potter attractive?" Lily and Rose were the last two team members remaining. A few guys raised their hands. "Feel free to leave," I said. They looked glum but left. "How many are here because you find Miss Weasley attractive?" I asked. Three or four guys including Ioan raised their hands. "Hate to break it to you, but she's taken. Ioan, since you're the one that took her, feel free to stay." I looked around at the thirty some people left. "How many of you are in Gryffindor?" I asked. A few of them were in my year, and I knew for a fact they were in other houses. Shockingly, all of them are girls. All the remaining guys and three girls raised their hands.
"If you didn't raise your hand for the last one, feel free to leave your name in the changing rooms and please leave," I said. The large group of girls giggled and left. "Alright. We've got four available spots on the team," I said. "Two Chasers, Seeker and Keeper," I said. "Keepers over here," I said, gesturing to the other side of the pitch. "Seekers, just here. Chasers, with Lily. Rose, will you deal with the Seekers please?" I asked.
"Yeah, of course," she said, eyeing Ioan (standing among them) with a hungry look. I felt a twinge of jealousy. God damn. And I'd thought those had gone away.
"Alright," I said to the Chasers. "Working with Lily, you're going to try and score goals past the shmucks trying out for Keeper," I said. The Keepers all seemed to quake in their boots, except for Rose's little brother, Hugo. I thought he played Chaser… I looked over at the Seekers. Rose and Ioan were making out in mid air. Fuck my life. Okay. I still sort of hate him.
"Rose! Tryouts!" I said sharply.
"I caught the snitch!" Ioan yelled back happily. Yeah, I'll bet you did. So long as the snitch counts as Rose in bed… Jealousy will get you nowhere, Scorpius. I sighed in anger.
Two hours later I had a team. Ioan was Seeker, Hugo Weasley as Keeper, Lily and two boys from her year Chasers, and Rose and I Beaters. I stormed into the newsroom, causing Dylan to jump.
"Got the censored personals," he said, throwing me a stack of parchment containing girls who were seeking sex that could not be printed in the newspaper. This sounds horribly conceited, but most of them were lusting after me. I sat down at my desk. Rose had dragged Ioan off to her dormitory the moment tryouts were over. You see, it's not Ioan I have a problem with. It's the fact Rose is happy. That may sound horrible, but I'd thought she was happy with me, but no… I pulled a corked bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhiskey out from under my desk. Dylan glared at me.
"That's not allowed in here," he said. I ignored him, pulled the cork out and took a swig.
"I'm the oldest student in Hogwarts," (sadly true), "I'm going to drink if I want to," I said, starting to flip through the personals.
"I'm worried about you, mate," Dylan said.
"Yeah, me too," I replied, drinking more and grabbing two of the papers before storming out.
OOooOOooOOooOO
By Christmas, it took me three hands to count how many girls I'd slept with. I knew I was going down a really bad path, but I couldn't seem to stop myself. At the Christmas holiday, I went to the Burrow with Al, and Dylan and Will. Rose invited Ioan. We arrived in a flurry of snow, quickly becoming warm by the fire.
"Albus!" Grandma Weasley said, running into the den where we were all huddled. "I thought I said only one guest per family member!" She looked around at us, glaring at Al.
"I only brought one!" he exclaimed, gesturing at Dylan. "I brought him, Rosie brought Ioan, and Scor brought Will!" This caused Rose, Ioan, Will, Dylan and me to pause in confusion.
"That would make him part of the family," Grandma Weasley said. "Ah, why not?"
"Do you really mean it?" I asked excitedly. See? I don't have to be in love with Rose and marry her to be part of the family! Although I'd like to be married to Rose one day…
"Of course, dear!" Grandma Weasley said. "I know how distant and cold your family is… You need a proper grandmother." I grinned for real for the first time in a long time.
"My family's adopted my ex-boyfriend…" Rose muttered to herself, looking flustered. I grinned at her.
"Makes it harder to escape me," I said. Ioan glared at me. Between men, I don't think it was really any secret I'm still in love with Rose. But she seems rather oblivious to the fact.
"Yes, so, Scor, Dylan, Will, Al, Ioan was it? You lot will be in Ron's old room with James once he gets here," Grandma Weasley was saying.
"Okay," we said.
"Rose, you'll be with Lily and Lyra in Ginny's room," she added.
"Lyra's going to be here?" I asked.
"Well of course!" she exclaimed from the doorway. "I'm part of the family too!" The lot of us whirled around. She and James were falling through the door. Rose ran forwards and hugged her. James high fived Al, me, Will and Dylan before turning to Ioan.
"And you might be…?" he asked.
"I'm Ioan," Ioan said, seeming slightly awkward. Poor bastard.
"Since when are you part of the family, Scor?" Lyra asked me over Rose's head. Technically, Lyra is not related to me in any way. In reality, she's the closest person ever to a sister, excluding Rose.
"Since today," I replied. "You?"
"Officially? It'll be July 7th," she said, holding up her left hand, where a diamond glittered. The jaws of the assembled dropped. Grandma Weasley exclaimed in happiness before wrapping Lyra and James in a bear hug.
"I get to be best man, right?" Al demanded.
"Of course!" James said. I smiled sadly, honestly trying to be happy for them, but finding it was not within me. I made the mistake of glancing at Rose. Yeah… Fire whiskey sounds really good right now…